Chapter 19
19
Z eke had a whole life packed into this tiny cabin, and after almost two weeks of maneuvering around each other, Wesley was starting to get a feel for things.
And he wasn’t happy.
Zeke had built a cozy nest for himself, a cave really, where he could keep himself to himself. It was safe, for sure, and comfortable for one person, if a bit tight for two, and it wasn’t healthy.
They had brunch and dinner in the dining room now, but he still felt like he was dragging Zeke around with him. He felt that if the boy could have his way, they’d just stay in. But he needed more. He liked people. He wanted to do things. And he really felt like Zeke would like the world better holding his hand.
They hadn’t even had a hardcore scene since he’d been back. They’d had a lovely, romantic little honeymoon, but the boy had had his way long enough.
Right now, he didn’t even know where his boy was. He knew Zeke was in the cabin, but beyond that—how did you lose someone in four hundred square feet?
“Zeke? Boy? Where’d you go?” He surveyed the downstairs, counting all the guitars, then climbed the stairs to the loft.
He heard soft singing coming from the loft — Zeke had a lovely voice, and his boy was obviously happy.
“I hear you, songbird. I’m coming up.”
“Mmm…” Zeke’s head appeared over the top of the bed. “How are you, Sir? Happy?”
God he loved that adorable head. “I’m not… unhappy. Come downstairs, please?”
“Sure. I was just playing and enjoying the sunshine.” Zeke put some papers in a drawer before standing up.
“Working on something?” He backed down the stairs, which were really a glorified ladder, to make room for Zeke.
“Nothing much. I’m writing some stuff for a movie.”
“A movie? Wow.” Jesus. Zeke was so cool, and he didn’t even know it. He took his boy’s hand and pulled him over to the couch.
“Mmhmm.” Zeke came right to him, those dark eyes gleaming at him. “I’m enjoying it. It’s something new.”
“Zeke.” He wasn’t going to hesitate. He knew what he needed to say. “It’s time for more. I need more. And I think if you remember who you are, you’ll realize that you do too. I want to book a playroom tonight. And I want to go into town tomorrow.”
Zeke’s eyes went wide, and he could see the desire in that gaze. The pulse in his throat sped, and he wanted to kiss it, encourage it to move faster.
But he would save that for their scene. “My good boy. I want you ready for a scene. I want you focused. So no more movie music today.”
“No more movie music.” Zeke nodded, kissed the tip of his nose. “Yes, Sir.”
He forgave the kiss. That’s how they’d been for two weeks. It was a habit. “I want you to look around and find a cushion. Something for you to kneel on. You can put it next to that chair I like to read in for now.” He was feeling better with every word.
“Yes, Sir. I have one for yoga.” Zeke stood, whistling softly as he headed to one of the closets and started digging around.
He certainly couldn’t make Zeke any happier with this scene, so his goal would be to make sure the boy was grounded. Settled. Diffuse some of the anxiety he knew would be coming with their outing tomorrow.
“Thank you, boy.” He stood and watched Zeke move. He seemed to be giving off a bit of electricity.
“I’m glad you’re here with me. It feels like a dream. Like an amazing dream.”
“It’s real, boy. It will feel very real this evening.” He pulled out his phone and texted the front desk.
Wesley
Room reservation. Eight o’clock. Spanking bench. St. Andrews Cross.
He wasn’t sure which one was going to work best yet.
Jamie
Yes, Master Wesley. Your room has been reserved. If you need anything as all, please let us know.
Zeke was wandering a little, restless, cushion in his hand.
“Boy. Put it by that chair please.” He pointed, watching, trying to pay attention to what was happening with his boy. “And kneel there.”
“Yes, Sir.” Zeke did as he asked, but even kneeling, his boy was not focused or settled, was still distracted.
“Close your eyes.” He moved closer. Not close enough to touch, but enough that Zeke ought to be able to feel him there. “Take a nice, slow deep breath.”
Zeke did as he was told, and he took a long breath, then another. His boy wanted to do as he was told.
“Good. Eyes stay closed.” He took a good breath too and kept his words measured and even. “Tell me what’s on your mind.”
“Everything. It feels like—like I’m in the middle of a tornado. Like I can’t pick out a single thought.”
On one level, he understood the creative mind, and Zeke had been living that lifestyle uninterrupted for a long time. On the other hand… “A boy should be thinking about his Master.”
“I am! You are totally in here with me, Sir!” Zeke’s eyes popped open, then closed quickly.
“I believe you.” He chuckled at Zeke. “I was trying to help you narrow down your thoughts a bit.”
“Oh. Sorry, Sir. I’m sorry. I’m so worried about messing up, about disappointing you. I keep telling myself that’s stupid, for sure. You love me. I deserve to be loved.”
He wanted to hug Zeke up for that. It was such a huge leap for the boy. But Wesley was listening. Knowing he was loved wasn’t an issue anymore, but the impulse to not make a mistake was still there. “Don’t tell yourself it’s stupid. Tell yourself it’s unnecessary. It’s stress you don’t need. It’s a burden you don’t have to carry anymore. Tell yourself it’s safe to let it go.”
“It’s safe. You love me, and you have my back.” Zeke sighed softly and rolled his shoulders. “I love you, too.”
“I love you so much. You give me a gift every day just by waking up with me. You are safe, in every way. Mistakes mean you’re trying, and that’s what’s important to me. You can’t disappoint me if you’re trying.”
“I am, Sir. I swear. I’m looking forward to tonight. I’m excited.” Zeke was beginning to relax, sitting back on his heels.
“Me too. It’s been a while. I hope to help quiet your soul the way we’ve just helped to quiet your mind a bit.”
“I think that sounds like heaven. I’m ready to be—” Zeke sighed softly. “It’s hard to put into words.”
There were so many things that could finish that sentence, but he decided to give the boy just one to focus on. “Mine.”
Zeke offered him a smile—one that was pure sunshine. “Yes, Sir. All yours.”
He smiled back and touched Zeke’s cheek, long enough for the boy to miss it when he took it away again. “Think about that and work on your headspace.” He took a couple of steps away. “I am going to find something to read.”
“There are books on the shelf under the stairs.”
Like he didn’t know that.
“Thank you, boy.” He was actually headed for his tablet. He found it and made his way back to the chair to get comfy. He even pulled the blanket Zeke kept there over his knees.
“Can I lean against you, Sir?”
“Yes, you may.” He’d more or less intended as much, and he was glad that Zeke felt comfortable asking for what he needed. He’d share the blanket if his boy seemed chilly as well.
Zeke rested one cheek on his thigh, eyes falling closed, one hand wrapped around his calf.
He propped his tablet on one knee and opened the newspaper and rested his other hand in Zeke’s hair, combing through it slowly with his fingers. “It’s snowing.”
“Yes, Sir. It’s going to be this way for days. You, me, a fire, snow—it’s like a fantasy.”
“I think we need to make sure we’re back in reality now, boy. It may look like a fantasy, but it’s a beautiful reality. Aside from the fact that we have to bundle up and go out in it later.” He chuckled. It would be a cold walk over to the lodge.
“A beautiful reality.” Zeke hummed. “Oh, I like that. I like that a lot.”
He nodded, thinking that Zeke was ridiculously good for his ego, and if he wasn’t careful, he’d start believing he was perfect. Not even Doms were perfect, much as he liked to pretend.
Zeke’s hand moved on his calf, tapping and sliding, the motion rhythmic and fascinating.
Stillness didn’t come naturally to Zeke. “Are you okay, boy?”
“Yes, Sir. Just spinning happily with you.”
“Spinning?” That was an interesting thing to say. “What do you mean?”
“I mean that there are a thousand thoughts, and we’re bringing them together into a hundred, ten.”
Ten was still too many, but he’d take it for now. Hopefully a little sting later would help the boy focus on just one and be still. If not tonight, then soon. They were together now; they had time. “You don’t need a thousand. You don’t even need ten right now.”
“You don’t think so?” Zeke sighed for him, whispered. “I can’t make them stop by myself. I’m not sure I can even try. It keeps me busy.”
“Let’s see how you feel later.” He tugged on Zeke’s hair, then smoothed it over with his fingers.
Zeke’s head tilted, and he breathed, in and out, focusing on Wesley’s touch. He knew that tilt. It meant Zeke was interested, listening. All that from a little tug.
Hm. He had ideas. Constant reminders were easy enough to come by.
He tugged, soothed. Tugged, soothed.
And his boy was right there, focused on him.
He turned his eyes back to his electronic newspaper, knowing he had his boy’s attention.
* * *
Wesley led Zeke to their room and unlocked the door with the key from Jamie. He’d liked to have stayed at the bar and talked for a while, catch up with the bartender and get a feel for the lodge again, but they would do that soon.
Tonight, he was focused and so was his boy.
The room was warm at his request. He took Zeke’s coat and hung it up with his own. “Everything off, boy. Take your time and warm up.”
“Yes, Sir.” Zeke started with his sweater, then his shoes, the energy buzzing around his boy.
He took his time and removed his boots and socks, then tugged his T-shirt off over his head. He’d worn an old favorite pair of jeans, and he kept those on. He kept an eye on Zeke, but didn’t rush him, and went to inspect all the restraints on the St. Andrew’s Cross.
Zeke stripped down, standing there before him, naked and proud, lean as a rail, shifting his weight back and forth.
He finished checking the restraints first, then went right to his boy. “You look beautiful. Come kneel for me.” He led Zeke to a wide-open space on the floor and gave the boy a kiss. “Right here.”
Zeke smiled to him, nodded. “Yes, Sir. I love you.”
Then he knelt.
“Good boy.” He left Zeke there to check the spanking bench too, running his hands over it, making sure it was safe. He knew it would be, but it was his ritual and there was nothing bad about peace of mind. “I want you to wear my stripes, boy. How do you feel about that?”
“Excited. Nervous. Proud.”
The boy’s words made his heart beat faster. So honest and open. Absolutely his.
The cross it was then.
He went to the armoire and looked through the floggers, testing them until he found one that felt good in his hand but wouldn’t tear the poor boy up.
He wasn’t sure how much Zeke enjoyed a flogger, the first one he’d used was just heavy and didn’t leave marks, but Zeke didn’t seem scared or worried.
He brought the one he’d chosen over to Zeke and held it where the boy could see it, running his fingers through the falls. “I like this one.”
“It’s beautiful, Sir. I bet it leaves marks.” Zeke chewed on his bottom lip, nipples tight, hands fisted on his thighs. “I trust you.”
“Tell me your safe words, please.” Nerves were natural, anxiety too. He wasn’t going to take Zeke’s brave words away from him, but he could remind the boy that he had a way out if he needed it.
“Minor and major, Sir.” The question seemed to relax his boy, ease him.
“Minor and major. I’m always listening. Stand, please.” He waited for Zeke to stand, held the boy’s gaze for a long moment, making sure they connected, then walked around behind his boy. “You may walk over to the cross. Right arm up first.”
“Can I ask you a question, Sir?” Zeke moved as he asked, heading for the cross.
“Of course. Please do.” He followed Zeke and rested his hands on the boy’s hips.
“You won’t leave me here, will you?”
Oh, poor boy. The question horrified him, and the fact that Zeke felt he needed to ask meant there was something there from that awful former Dom. He turned Zeke back around to make sure the boy could see his face. “No. Never. That’s not safe, I wouldn’t be able to hear your words if I left the room. I will never leave you bound and alone. I promise.”
Zeke pushed right into his arms and hugged him incredibly hard. “Thank you, Sir.”
Then he let go and moved up to the cross.
He took a breath to steady his own mind a bit. This was a great responsibility in any case, but Zeke had history and baggage, and things like this that he wasn’t prepared for were going to come up. He just wished more for Zeke. He would show Zeke there was so much more.
“I don’t punish. Pain is meant to be pleasure in the end, and if that’s not how things feel to you, please use your words. It’s meant to help focus the mind, awaken the body, and bring us closer.” He locked Zeke’s right wrist into the luxuriously padded cuff. They didn’t spare any expense in this place.
Zeke rolled his hand in his cuff. “I haven’t done anything to be punished for, Sir. This is about us, being together, in a special way.”
“Good boy. You’re exactly right.” He strapped his boy’s other wrist in. “Don’t let your fingers fall asleep. Warn me before that happens.” He knelt to work on Zeke’s feet and teased the boy a little, nibbling on one thigh.
That earned him a soft little chuckle, a clenched ass cheek. “Master!”
“Right here, my boy.” He closed the strap on that ankle and moved to the other, then stood again and took a step back to admire.
Zeke was beginning to pant, just the slightest bit, his boy flushed, wanting him. He let the flogger dangle at his side and shook out his arm, watching as Zeke tried to keep still, but even locked down, his boy wanted to move.
He swung the flogger gently a few times, learning the weight, then brought it down on Zeke’s ass lightly, testing the distance. “Let’s fly, boy.”
“Yes, Sir.” Zeke tugged at the cuffs again, almost instinctively. “I’m here with you.”
He started slow and light, bringing the flogger down with an easy roll in a figure eight. Shoulder, ass, shoulder, ass, setting a rhythm Zeke could follow for a bit.
Slowly Zeke began to breathe with him, shift back and forth in time with his blows.
“Good boy. I’m going to change it up now.” He warned Zeke this time since they were new. He pulled the flogger back and swiped it through the air, feeling the weight and the acceleration before trying it out on his boy. When he did, he wanted to be in control.
Zeke’s fingers tensed as he waited, his toes clenching rhythmically. His boy was pure music. He watched, and once he caught on to Zeke’s inner beat, he took a breath and brought the flogger down fast and hard, once on each shoulder.
Zeke gasped, jerking against his bonds, then visibly forced himself to relax and focus.
“I’m listening for your words boy, and I don’t hear them.” He swung again, adding two more sets of stripes to the first.
“I love you. You don’t hear them, Master.”
He tucked the flogger under his arm and stepped close to his boy’s side. “I love you, too. But your words are about safety, not love. My job is to keep you safe.”
Zeke turned his head and met his eyes. “I know. I’m with you, Sir. I’m right here.”
He nodded. “Good boy.” Clear enough. He moved back behind Zeke and tried out the flogger on that gorgeous ass. Two blows, just as fast, but lighter.
Zeke’s ass clenched, and he gasped, but he didn’t draw away. The boy was so completely his right now that he felt like he could do anything and Zeke would take it for him. But he wasn’t getting any clues as to what his boy actually needed.
Still, that was a lot of stripes, and he didn’t want his arm to tire yet. He set the flogger aside and moved in behind his boy so he could snake a hand over one hip and around to Zeke’s pretty cock.
The sweet flesh responded immediately, going turgid, full and hard at his touch. “Your hands. Fuck…”
“Mm. Respect please, boy.” He stroked along the full length, loving the heat in his boy’s voice and the way Zeke’s body reacted to him with such need.
“Sorry. Sorry, Sir. You make me forget myself.” Zeke keened softly as he tried to find a way to move into his touch.
“I like that.” Aftercare was going to be almost as good as the scene. He was going to have a big puddle of sub to take home later. “Do you like the flogger, boy?” He kept his hand moving, not letting Zeke rush anything or get one thing more than he was already offering.
“I like the burn after, Sir. The sting is hard, but not so much that it’s not worth it.” Zeke found his rhythm and sank into it, his whole body in it.
“Mhm.” That was a challenge, could he find a way to give his boy that burn without the sting? Maybe not in a way that would satisfy them both all the time, but what a great reward that would be. He’d have to ask around. “Don’t come. Get as close as you want, but don’t you dare.”
Zeke moaned, the sound so needy, and that pretty cock jerked in his hand. “Do—do you want me to warn you, if I’m too close, Master?”
“No need. You can follow my order, or you can use a safe word.” He let the boy’s pretty cock go, though, and went in search of lube.
Zeke nodded. “Yes, Sir.”
There was a soft sigh, nothing frustrated or long-suffering, but almost sweet.
He found what he was looking for and made sure that Zeke saw it on his way back over. He set it down as he stripped out of his sweats, feeling just dirty enough as he curled his fingers around his own cock and admired his boy’s pink stripes. “Fuck, you’re gorgeous right now.”
“I feel like I’m burning, way down in my bones.” Zeke licked his lips. “What a hook. You inspire me.”
“Sir.” He gave one striped ass cheek a pat, then opened the lube while Zeke wiggled and gasped at the sting. “And thank you, I’m glad.”
“I am too, Sir.” Zeke leaned back and offered him a kiss.
Zeke was a naughty boy, and he was easily manipulated and he didn’t care. No, he did care, and he loved it. He took the kiss that was offered and pressed slippery fingers against that sweet ass, working them slowly inside his boy.
That earned him a deep, hard moan, the sound honest and rough, raw. It echoed in his balls and threatened to make him lose control.
“You make me feel like all this time you’ve just been waiting for me. Not just someone, but me. It’s like you were built for me, boy.” He slid kisses over Zeke’s jaw and down his neck to one striped shoulder.
“M-master!” Zeke whimpered softly, giving him a full-body shiver. “I need you more than breathing.”
He hummed and let his fingers slide free, anxious for his boy too. He lined up and groaned as he pushed inside, so fucking hard his balls ached. “Keep breathing anyway.”
“Yes, Sir! Breathing…” Zeke worked his cock like a master, body clenching and releasing, over and over.
Fuck, Zeke knew how to turn all his careful control into a total illusion. He took his boy by the hips and rocked, taking Zeke hard.
Zeke whimpered, shaking around him, trying so hard to hold on for him that it made him incredibly proud.
“Breathe,” he whispered. Fuck he loved how it felt when Zeke shot, the way Zeke’s whole body contracted around his cock. He wanted that so fucking bad. “Wait for me. Wait, boy.”
“Yes, Sir. I’m trying. I’m trying so hard. I love you. Please!”
He nodded and let Zeke take his focus from him, let the boy have what he wanted—what they both needed. He pressed his forehead against Zeke’s nape and shivered, then whispered, “Now, love.”
“Now…” Zeke barked out a wild cry, shooting hard, body clenching around him.
He threw his head back as he came, shouting, or trying to as sparks obscured his vision and blinded him for a long moment. He was lightheaded and his fingers dug into his boy’s hips. He held on, partly just to keep himself standing as he raked in a breath. “Zeke, love.”
“Master.” Zeke’s voice was rough as a cob, his boy totally blown.
“Mhm. My good boy.” He kissed Zeke’s nape. “I’ve got you.” It was time to get Zeke down, hold his boy for a minute, see to his stripes. He took a deep breath and leaned back enough to free his spent cock, and he couldn’t fight his groan. Then he headed for the chest at the end of the room, which held warm, damp cloths. “Be still, boy, I’ve got you.”
“Uh-huh…” Zeke groaned softly, humming under his breath.
He took his time cleaning Zeke up first, then himself, and after he’d tossed everything in a covered bin, he bent to free his boy’s ankles. “How are your fingers? Asleep?”
“Just starting to be tingly. I need down, please.”
“I’m on it now.” He worked faster, freeing Zeke’s other foot, then moved quickly to his boy’s hands. “Move slowly, there’s a table over here I want to stretch you out on. Wiggle those fingers.” He watched Zeke carefully, supporting his boy as they moved. “How’s your head?”
“Heavy. It feels wildly heavy.” Zeke offered him a watery grin.
“Well, you can lie it down now and rest. Don’t try to sit, just slide right onto your tummy. Put your arm anywhere you’re comfortable.” He helped Zeke move, careful not to touch the boy’s lovely stripes. They’d be very sensitive right now and he wanted to get some ointment on them right away.
His boy groaned as he moved, settling deep into the sheets. “Oh, I can feel everything. Just everything .”
“That’s good. Just float with it, my sweet, good boy.” He kissed Zeke’s cheek. “I’m not going anywhere, just stepping over to the cabinet by the door to get something for your back.” He let his fingers slide slowly away, then hurried to the aftercare cabinet and got what he needed.
Zeke was beginning to shiver by the time he got back, just beginning to react to the stripes.
“Breathe, you’re okay. I’m going to put some ointment on your stripes to help them heal and also it will take some of the sting away for a while so you can relax.” He got to work quickly but carefully.
“Your hands are warm.”
The salve was cool, though, and Zeke had goosebumps before long.
He understood now why there were always two or three couples with blissed-out boys sitting by the big fire in the lounge. He couldn’t walk Zeke back to the cabin right away. It was too damn cold.
He checked his work and all of his boy’s stripes, gave Zeke another kiss, then pulled on some sweats and his T-shirt, then found a big comforter under the massage table. “I don’t want you to be cold, boy. Can you sit up?”
Zeke angled up, moaning softly as he did. “Yes, Sir. I can.”
He pulled himself up on the table and helped Zeke move to lean against him, then covered them both with the comforter. “This thing is really fluffy. Decadent.”
“Mmhmm… So soft. Not like you. You’re warm.”
“Good. I want you to be comfortable. You did so well. I’m so proud of you.” He was proud of them both, really. Proud of his boy for being so brave and honest, proud of himself for making it a good experience for Zeke. His boy needed that.
“Thank you, Master. I feel…” Zeke sighed softly. “I feel you everywhere. I feel like I’m floating.”
“Relax and enjoy that feeling.” He planned to. He held Zeke close, letting the amazing high seep into his soul. It had been so long, and it hadn’t ever been so good.
Zeke was quiet and heavy against him, breathing nice and easy.
“Are you warm enough?” It was so hard for Zeke to be still and relax. This felt like a small victory. He planned to take his boy into town tomorrow, but he was flexible. If Zeke was still floating and needing him close, he’d put that off another day.