Chapter 14
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
Erika
Tentatively, I walk down the stairs in search of the aroma that can only be described as rich and comforting; the one that has been drifting up the stairs for the last couple of hours. It smells a lot like caramelized earthy vegetables, wine stock, and something meaty. Whatever it is, I want it.
My stomach grumbles in agreement as I walk into Leon’s kitchen, the magical notes of rosemary and garlic hitting my senses.
“My mom and dad have arrived for Sunday dinner. They’re in the living room,” Leon informs me, throwing me off balance as he calmly takes a sip of his wine.
“What?” I look around, startled and utterly unprepared for visitors. “Why?”
“Because we usually do this on Sunday, but they’re off on vacation tomorrow, so we moved it to Friday instead.”
“Here? Now?” I don’t know why I’m asking; I already know his parents come here every week for dinner.
“Yes.”
Leon’s mom is British, and he is skilled at cooking a traditional roast dinner, which his mom taught him.
“Leon, I don’t want to see them.” Panic overtakes me. Shame feels more accurate.
“Why not?”
“You know why,” I shrill, running my hands frantically through my hair. They are the first guests I will have seen since the disastrous non-wedding.
He puts his wine glass down and lays his hands out in front of him, urging me to stop stressing. “Baby, they don’t care. In their eyes, you could do no wrong. They love you, Erika.”
Leon walks around the kitchen island toward me. “Like all of us, they only want you to be happy.”
Dammit. He had me at baby. “Okay.”
“Stop worrying. Let me handle the worrying for you.”
Before I realize what’s happening, he’s wrapped himself around me. “I missed you today.” His voice sounds full of sadness.
Instinctively, I wrap my arms around his waist and snuggle into the crook of his neck. At five foot nine, I’m tall, but he’s taller, and yet somehow, we always fit perfectly together.
“I missed you, too,” I admit.
It’s the first time I’ve seen him properly since breakfast. I hate that neither of us brought up what I mentioned straight after our run.
After all, I asked him to think about his actions before making any hasty decisions about us. So, I assume he’s doing that now. Thinking.
Although I wish he had spoken to me as breakfast felt forced and a bit awkward. That’s not who we are.
I hated every bite of my pancakes.
After breakfast, I kept myself busy while he spent the whole day on the phone and behind his laptop, working in the conference room here at the house.
We’ve been living separately all day, tiptoeing around each other.
I also hated that. I guess if I want him to come on vacation with me, then I need to cut him some slack.
He’s rearranging his life for me, and I’m excited about spending sun-filled days lounging by our private pool.
Vegas and then Bora Bora, just the two of us.
Deep down, it’s what I’ve always wanted.
“Don’t be a stranger, and please don’t push me away, Erika.”
“We need to talk.” Maybe I shouldn’t have said what I said earlier, and it’ll be awkward if we don’t clear the air before we go.
He sighs heavily, as if the weight of the world is on his shoulders. “It’s all we ever do.”
We are experts in the art of avoidance. “And yet neither of us really says anything,” I admit honestly.
“It’s time, Erika.” He squeezes me and kisses the top of my head, which he’s done more in the last two days than he has in years.
“My parents are staying over tonight since they have a flight to Los Angeles in the morning, and I’m dropping them off at the airport.
My team will be working here tomorrow, so we can talk once everyone has left. ”
“Okay.” Twenty-four hours have never felt so long, but it will give me time to think about what I want to say. He may need to peel me off the ceiling with worry before then; I’m already nervous just thinking about our talk. “Why is your team coming here?” I ask, switching the focus away from us.
“To review some contracts and handle any last-minute details before I leave. I didn’t want to go into the office on a Saturday.
” He finally releases me from his tight grip, which I already miss.
Handing me a glass of red wine, he proceeds to pick up his own.
“Liquid courage for tonight. Not that you need it.” He taps the rim of his glass against mine, making them ching as they touch. “Cheers.”
“Cheers.” I’m already feeling better. He always has a way of reassuring me.
“I wouldn’t have minded staying here tomorrow by myself.
You have a gym, a pool, and I have a to-be-read list longer than my legs; I would have found ways to keep myself busy.
” However, I struggled to fill the day. I tried watching a new television series, but if anyone asked me what it was about, I wouldn’t be able to give a single detail about the plot.
The tension between Leon and me has made too many thoughts spin through my mind, and my concentration is at an all-time low.
“My team will be here at eleven, and Sutton may arrive earlier to set up the conference room. She’ll let herself and the team in if I haven’t returned from the airport. Sutton isn’t happy about me going away because I just increased her workload for the next few weeks.” He rolls his eyes.
“Does she like anything? Or anyone?”
“What makes you ask that?” Leon looks confused as he sets his wine glass down, his brows furrowing.
“Because she hates me, and now she’ll hate me even more because I’m the one forcing you to rearrange your days.”
Leon’s Rottweiler assistant, Sutton, has never said anything about disliking me; no, it’s more of a gut feeling I have.
Add that to the side eyes she gives me with the hint of disdain in the way she talks to me, and you have one hell of a sulky Sutton with a chip on her shoulder the size of the CN Tower.
He waves off my observation. “That’s not true.”
I don’t usually go into Leon’s office in town, but when I do, she’s like the worst or best bodyguard in the world, depending on how you look at it. She always asks if I have an appointment. Petty, much? “It’s true. Did you hear what she said to me the last time we went for lunch?” I ask him.
“The bit about you being a bad distraction for me?” Leon knows exactly what I’m talking about. “She wasn’t being rude.”
“It’s not what she says, Leon, it’s the way she says it. She hates me, end of.”
He raises his hands in mock surrender. “Okay. But if your feelings are genuine, then there’s a reason she doesn’t like you.”
“I’ve never given her a reason to dislike me. What’s her problem with me?” My curiosity is piqued.
“You’re a triple threat.”
“A triple threat?” I take a sip of the fine wine and let the earthy, sweet herbal notes fill my mouth. Bliss. I can already feel the alcohol taking effect, relaxing my muscles.
Leon starts making a list. “One, you have a body to die for; you could have easily been a model.”
I scoff, almost snorting wine out of my nose. “A model?” Coughing at his ridiculousness, my cheeks flush with color, and I clear my throat to let him continue.
“You’re an ER doctor. An excellent one at that. You’re brilliant.”
“You don’t know that. You’ve never been to the ER before.”
“You took care of an Eagles’ player, Bryan Hooper, when he broke his collarbone. He said you were brilliant. I already knew that, though.” He shrugs cockily.
“Okay, and the third thing?” I press him a bit more.
“You’re my best friend, and Sutton has mentioned in the past that instead of taking you as my plus one to events, she should be the one accompanying me.
She’s jealous of you. Also, she asked me out on a date once.
” He looks up to the side as if thinking about that. “Twice, now I come to think about it.”
“She’s too young for you.” She’s fifteen years younger than Leon. Just the thought of her touching him makes my blood curdle.
“Age gap romance, isn’t that what they call it in those books you read?” He’s so flippant about the whole thing as I imagine making a voodoo doll of Sutton and sticking pins into it.
“So, you have been paying attention to what I read?” I tease, doing my best to hide my annoyance, setting my wine glass down.
He steps closer, leaving just a few inches between us. “When it comes to you, I’m always paying attention.”
“Is that right?” I’m too startled by his stream of compliments to ask what else he’s noticed, and I suddenly feel shy, not something I am familiar with, while ripples of excitement dance in my stomach.
He nods as his mouth moves closer to mine, the space between us crackling with unspoken energy. The moment ignites; it’s magnetic, volatile, electric, and pulls us together to ignite the flame.
“That’s right, baby.”
Millimeters apart, our lips softly brush against each other.
This moment is monumental because if we kiss, it’s the first time we’ve touched lips since our twenties.
It’s like opening a long-forgotten book, flicking through pages, and jumping from chapter to chapter of the times we’ve spent together.
And finally, after all this time, we’re about to kiss again.
What happens next, I don’t know, but I’m desperate to find out and take a leap of faith with him because it feels so right.
His warm breath brushes against my skin. It’s a whisper of all we’ve been and all we’re about to become.
“Erika.” My name falls from his lips.
“What’s happening between us?” I ask, my voice sounding a little croaky.
“What I’ve always wanted to happen,” he replies, his eyes anchoring me in place.
I gasp at his honesty and the words I’ve been longing to hear, my feelings for him intensifying as the seconds pass.
“Know this,” he adds. “Me and you, we’re not just best friends. We’re unavoidable. And tomorrow, we’re going to talk about what comes next. I’m done pretending I don’t want more.”
His heartfelt confession causes my brain to stutter for a beat as it tries to keep up. “You want more? Are you sure?” I’m totally entranced by his words and the way he’s looking at me.
“Yes.” The firmness in his voice tells me he’s not messing around.
“Since when?”
“For as long as I can remember.”
I press my lips together to stop myself from laughing as nerves crawl up my throat. I’m too surprised to say anything as waves of shock hit me. Those are the words I’ve wanted to hear for years. Decades even. “You’re making me nervous,” I whisper eventually, excitement fluttering beneath my ribs.
“Relax.” He tries to calm my jitters.
How can I relax when we might be risking our friendship?
I never want to lose him. But maybe we are each other’s future, and this isn’t just a quick roll of the dice in some game of roulette.
Because it’s us. Him and me. He’s the one I’ve longed for, and right now, I want him again.
I wasn’t brave enough to chase after him before because he was my brother’s best friend. But now, everything has changed.
I’m older, wiser, and more certain.
I know what I want.
I want Leon.
It’s only ever been him. I was kidding myself, trying to think otherwise.
And that might be the most awkward conversation I’ll ever have with my brother.
I won’t just need a glass of wine; I’ll need the entire bottle.
“Things might have always been confusing between us,” he says. I notice a fleeting weakness in his expression. “But that stops now.”