Chapter 45 #2
I swallowed, glancing wildly to see what he did. Nothing looked particularly amiss. The soldiers were warming up for the day. A temporary kitchen had been set up where some women were passing out bowls of breakfast to those who wandered by.
Frowning, I glanced at him, my brow lifted in a silent question.
And my king grinned back at me, a joyous light hidden in his grey eyes. He pointed to the forest line. “Look there.”
I followed his line of sight, narrowing my eyes and searching for—
“Iris!”
Ithrew myself down the staircase, bare feet slapping against the hardwood.
Breathlessly, I shoved through the people milling about in the front foyer so that I could hurl myself through the main entryway onto the porch.
Gasps and frowns followed me as I went, Clay assuring everyone that everything was alright as he followed only a few steps behind me. I could hear the grin in his voice.
I didn’t look for it though. Most days, I would crave to see his smile—those expressions were so far and few between—but in that particular moment, I was far too consumed with the approach of my best friend to think of anything else.
She and Nikolai rode together, the reins wrapped in her fingertips while his hands rested easily along the edges of her thighs.
As they approached the house, Nikolai’s men began cheering, happily welcoming him home.
He smiled and nodded at them, dipping to whisper something to Iris, who laughed, turning to smack him.
And when she turned back, she locked eyes with me.
Her jaw fell open, eyes scanning over me, and she yanked on her reins, pulling her horse to a sharp and sudden stop.
For a moment the world faded away as we stared at each other. She didn’t move, didn’t even seem to breathe, and neither did I. I waited for her reaction with my hands fisted at my sides.
Maybe she wasn’t happy to see me.
I’d betrayed her by freeing Camilla, after all.
Then I’d abandoned her by staying at the castle.
Maybe I’d lost her friendship once and for all. And Gods, the thought of that was agonizing. I wasn’t sure I could continue painting this brave face on each morning knowing that I’d lost her permanently.
The sound of my gulp echoed in my skull.
“It’s good to see you back in one piece.” Clay’s greeting, said from only a few feet behind me, landed in the tension between us, cracking whatever silent standoff we engaged in.
And then Iris was off her horse, arms pumping as she ran towards me, nearly tackling me in her rush to embrace me.
I released a desperate sort of breath, tears already springing to life in my eyes.
“You’re alright?” She demanded, pulling back to take my head in her hands and examine me more closely. “You’re okay?”
I nodded, feeling dampness spread in trails down my cheeks.“I’m okay. And you?”
Iris grinned, a toothy grin that radiated warmth and joy—and love. “Yes, I’m okay too.”
She turned, glancing over her shoulder at Nikolai, who watched her with an intense kind of focus.
“We’re both okay,” she promised, clearing her throat somewhat awkwardly as she met my gaze once more.
And as quickly as that ice cold awkwardness between us had thawed, it returned once more. Her hands fell from my arms. I swallowed, watching as her tongue wet her lips and she took a careful step backward.
A chasm opened inside me as I stared at the movement of her feet. Over the past few months, I’d tolerated so much fear and pain that I couldn’t handle any more. That single step back from the woman whose friendship I cherished was more than I could handle.
And I realized I didn’t want to paint on a brave face anymore. I didn’t want to pretend I was okay when I wasn’t.
I wanted my friends to help me find my way again.
Without warning, I launched myself at her again, wrapping my arms around her frame and squeezing as I buried myself in the lilac curls of her hair. “I’m so sorry, Iris. I’m sorry for all of it. I never meant to hurt you. I just didn’t feel like I had any other choice.”
She stiffened under my grip for a time, and I felt her shift, looking towards Nikolai once more as my tears soaked through her tunic.
Clay cleared his throat, and even with my eyes squeezed painfully shut, I felt his approach—knew he was about to pull me away from her. He loved us both enough to allow me this final plea and to allow her to reject it.
But just as I felt his fingertips on my shoulder, she softened.
A sob worked through her, and her hand lifted against my back. “I know you didn’t, Thea.”
The sun behind her was blinding as I blinked my eyes open and pulled away enough to see her face once more.
“Really?”
Her own eyes, an odd shade of pink today, misted over with sincerity as she inclined her head into a nod.
“I hate that you went behind my back to free Camilla. And for a while, I swore I would never forgive you for it. I thought I would never find a way to trust you after you allied with the person who betrayed me and ruined everything I cared about.”
My chest tightened with her confession, but her tight grip on my ribcage kept me from moving away from this moment.
“But I don’t want to hold onto that pain anymore,” she breathed, fingers tightening against me. “I realized that I do deserve to love and be loved. So now, I just want to have my friend back.”
My relieved laugh sounded more like a choked gasp. “I never stopped being your friend.”
“Good.” She winked, her gaze flicking to Clay over my shoulder for a moment. “And don’t you ever!”
She gave my hands a quick squeeze before allowing Clay to pull me into his arms. I leaned into his warmth happily.
That chasm inside of me shrunk a tiny amount as I took in an easier breath than I had in days.
“Well, isn’t this nice?” Nikolai dismounted the horse, holding a hand to his stomach as he did, before throwing an arm over Iris’ shoulders, the position oddly similar to the way Clay and I stood pressed against one another. “All of us finally here together. One big, dysfunctional family.”
Her eyes darted to his stomach and then his face, obvious concern on her features.
“I presume you’ve been taking care of my home?” Nikolai asked Clay.
“I presume you’ve been taking care of my cousin?”
Iris snorted, the sound soon covered by a cough as Nikolai gave her a wicked sort of smile.
“I certainly have been,” he answered Clay.
I stared between the two of them, eyes bouncing back and forth from his self-satisfied grin and the slight blush on her cheeks.
She certainly had realized that she deserved to be loved.
My brows lifted, lips quirking into a thrilled smile. “It appears I have some things to catch up on.”
We retreated into Nikolai’s room and it took no more than five minutes to notice that Iris seemed intimately familiar with this space.
“I’ll spare you the details,” Clay explained in my ear as we stepped inside. “But they’ve known each other for some time, and my instincts tell me we’re going to have to deal with him for longer than I’d like.”
Desperately, I scratched awkwardly at the skin under my nose to hide my laugh.
She buzzed about quickly, bellowing for a healer while darting into the bathroom for towels.
A heartbeat later she returned, arms filled with cloths and bandages, and commanded Nikolai to undo his shirt.
Our host watched her movements with a casual smile and an easiness in his eyes that seemed at odds with the way he carefully lowered himself to the bed, clutching at his side.
“You’re hurt,” I noticed aloud.
He raised a brow at me. “And you look like you haven’t slept in ages.”
“Sacrifices have been made on all accounts, then.” I shrugged, stepping aside as a healer moved into the room.
She took one look at the bandages on his side and began tsking at him, nodding at Iris as she lowered herself next to Nikolai.
“I suppose I never have to worry about finding another occupation with you, hmm?” The healer asked, pulling away the gauze along his stomach to reveal a festering wound. My stomach turned as I caught sight of it, and I averted my gaze.
The healer pressed her hands above it, her magic falling over his skin. “It will scar. Whoever cauterized this did an amateur job.”
He snorted, and Iris smacked his arm, her cheeks flushing a bit.
“We didn’t have many other options,” Iris explained. “He’s alive, so I’ll call it a success.”
Nikolai hissed as the wound began repairing itself, focusing his attention on Iris instead of the healer's work. “I will wear your mark on my skin proudly, little bird.”
He leaned forward rapidly, catching Iris off guard as he pressed her lips to hers and she yelped in surprise before relaxing into his touch and returning the affection.
Clay made a face, upper lip curling back, and I pinched him.
“While I hate to rush this little reunion,” Clay told them, hiding his disgust with a smirk aimed in my direction. “I was planning on flying to Inanis today. I’d like to have up to date information when I meet with the President.”
Well, that announcement certainly soured my good mood.
Clay had told me earlier in the morning that he planned to meet with President Jonan and I hadn’t bothered to hide my feelings on the matter.
I hated the idea of being separated from him again.
In fact, the thought of it alone sent my heart racing and made me painfully aware of the shackles still strapped to each of my wrists.
But we needed allies.
And my escape from the castle apparently made the possibility of President Jonan joining our cause more likely.
So I’d begrudgingly agreed.
Iris, still obviously focused on the progress of Nikolai’s healing, one-handedly tossed a bag to Clay before removing the three blades strapped to her thigh.
“I would like to keep my original blade,” she requested, still not looking at him. “But I suppose these two would belong to each of you.”
I took them from her, glancing over the daggers while Clay pulled out two dusty tomes from the bag.
“And these are?” he held one book in the air.
And my heart stopped.
The world seemed to blur around me as I snatched it from his grip, staring at the title. My jaw fell open as I desperately tried to process how in all of creation they had found this.
“I had a feeling you might want that,” Nikolai noted, buttoning his shirt again as the healer took her leave. “Don’t suppose there’s information in there that’s helpful?”
Silence was his only answer.
I was too busy flipping through the pages, breathing in the words as if my life depended on it.
As if all of our lives depended on it.
My fingers stilled, when I found the page I’d been hunting for. I swallowed. The faded ink seemed almost alive as I traced over the words.
At the seat of your power, where magic flows most intensely, blood of the God must be shed. The blood will open. The God shall face their truth.
“What is it, love?” Clay asked me, his voice low as he tipped up the book in my hands to read the title.
I read the sentences over and over until I felt them imprint themselves on my soul. In the depths of my gut, that tiny spark of magic that still lingered inside of me suddenly seemed conscious once more. It was ready to be brought back to life.
“It’s instructions for a ritual,” I explained, meeting each of their gazes. “A ritual known as The Forging. It’s how a God comes into their maturity and forges their own Godly Weapon.”
Iris was the first to piece it together, her eyes darting from side to side as she figured it out. “Like Hyrax’s Bident.”
I nodded. “Exactly like that.”
“So if you do it,” she continued, stepping towards me to glance over the words along the pages still cradled in my hands. “You would create your own weapon. And theoretically, at maturity your powers would develop to be their strongest which might mean that...”
Her voice trailed off as if she were too afraid to say them out loud.
But I wasn’t.
“Not only would they come back, but they would be stronger than ever before.”