48. Sean
48
SEAN
T he next two days after my frustrating end to my date involved me working from home.
This was partly because Helen was back.
She was staying with us for the night, hoping to introduce Matt to Lucas and for us to get to know one another.
I’d expected it to sting, going out to dinner with Helen, Matt, and Lucas.
It was a restaurant just down the street from where I’d taken Chloe to on our first unexpected date.
I had looked over my shoulder at The Hilford, wishing I were there again with her, before Lucas called for me to hurry up and join them at their table.
I missed Chloe terribly, but my pride was too strong, and I was too stubborn to ask her how she was doing.
Our conversations, when we did have them, had been brusque on my part and professional on hers.
Except for one text she sent me, asking me how I was.
I was too furious with myself to respond reasonably.
I cared, dammit, and she had walked out on me.
I was in too deep while she was unaffected.
The other thing that hurt me today was the fact that Lucas chose to sit between his mom and Matt.
Not Helen’s incessant hugs and kisses to Matt, which I’d come to see as a constant reminder of how easily he fit into their world.
Lucas didn’t seem to mind his mother’s overbearing affection for her fiancé, I noticed.
While I couldn’t help but feel Helen’s affection should have been focused more on Lucas than Matt at the moment.
I watched Lucas’s face light up when he explained to her that he had a new friend now.
“Brianna,” I supplied.
“Is that so?” Helen asked, looking from me to Lucas and back at me again.
She gave me a funny look, almost as if she didn’t expect me to know much about Lucas’s friends.
“Dad’s the reason I met her,” Lucas explained to his mother.
“Dad took me biking in Central Park, and it was the best, Mom. Hey, we should do that tomorrow! All of us. It’ll be exciting.”
She gave me a wary look, and I remembered her dislike for biking.
“We can talk about that once we’ve taken a look at this,” she said, reaching for one of her bags.
She pulled out a wrapped present.
“I have tons of presents for you—one for each week that I missed you.”
We wouldn’t be biking tomorrow—I knew that.
Lucas shrieked with excitement and unwrapped his presents—a boomerang, as well as seven other toys that he didn’t care for.
I saw the warm hug he gave his mother.
He didn’t care what gifts she got him or if he couldn’t go biking, as long as he was with her.
“You’ve got a look on your face,” she muttered to me when Matt stepped out to use the restroom.
Lucas was busy with his new toys and wasn’t listening.
I felt myself bristle.
I wouldn’t tolerate her criticisms.
“What look?”
“That look you have when you’re doing something against your better instinct. Who is she?”
I froze.
I’d forgotten how well Helen knew me.
“I don’t know what you mean.”
She snorted.
“So, it is definitely a woman then.” She was silent for a bit and then snuck another look at me.
“Something’s different,” she mused as she continued to gaze at me.
“You look like you’ve gone beyond casual hookups and into lovesick territory.”
“You’re out of your mind,” I growled.
Surely, I wasn’t that obvious.
“Has Lucas met her?”
I took a deep breath.
There was no point in arguing anymore.
“She’s helping me bond with Lucas,” I said.
Helen barked out a laugh.
“She’s one of your nannies?” She didn’t wait for an answer.
“I hope you haven’t been out in public with her. It isn’t good for your image or for Lucas to know you’re sleeping with the help.”
I froze at Helen’s vile words.
“Don’t fucking talk about her that way,” I snarled, and Helen’s eyes widened in surprise.
“I’m crazy about Chloe, and, no, she isn’t just a nanny. She’s my employee at Tassater—and a very valuable one.”
Helen shook her head, biting back a response.
Finally, she said, “I hope you know you’ve crossed a line with dating an employee. She might be good in your bed, but that doesn’t mean you need to lose your head over her.”
“I haven’t lost my head over her,” I gritted out and hated the look of relief on her face.
Why shouldn’t I lose my head over Chloe, damn it?
Matt was on his way back, and I’d already paid the check, so I stood up before I slammed my fist into something from frustration.
“I’m leaving,” I said shortly to Helen, who didn’t look surprised.
Bidding a curt goodbye to Matt and giving Lucas a quick hug, I stepped away.
I turned around when I heard Lucas call after me.
“Dad,” he said, his gaze meeting mine with a vulnerability I’d never seen before.
“You promised me we’d make pizzas sometime.”
I had.
As I took a more puzzled look at him, I finally understood where he was going with this.
My heart swelled.
“Well then, buddy, looks like you’re coming home next weekend to make pizza with me.”
He gave me a broad smile, and I felt my heartbeat quicken.
I ruffled his hair, and then with a curt nod at Helen, I walked away.
The last thing I saw before I left was the happiness on Lucas’s face as he smiled back at me before it was replaced by a look of pure devotion as he turned to his mother.
It reminded me of the bond between Chloe and Henry.
Chloe couldn’t get used to leaving Henry alone any more than Lucas could handle his mom being away.
It stung that Chloe couldn’t be honest about who I was in her life, but could I really blame her?
She’d said it herself that she preferred to keep it quiet.
Which included keeping it from Henry.
It would take time, but it would get better, and then Chloe would soon trust me that I wasn’t here to take her brother away from her.
She needed to come around because I was going to fight for her.
I wasn’t giving up on us.
I reached for my keys and drove to Chloe’s.
Lucas and Helen were spending the night at Matt’s place, and I had my home to myself at last.
When I reached Chloe’s street, my heart all but sang out loud.
Parking the car, I reached for my phone and called her as I walked over.
She didn’t answer.
I called her again and again.
When she finally answered the call, it was with a frustrated, “What?”
I froze at her tone.
“How’s Henry?” I asked.
She didn’t answer right away, probably caught off guard.
“He’s fine,” she said at last.
“Was he awake when you reached home at one a.m. after running out on our date?” I asked.
I was staring at her apartment door, wishing I could break it down.
“No,” she said, after a moment’s hesitation.
Great, so she’d run out on me, only to go home to her brother, who had been safe and asleep.
When she didn’t speak, I knocked on her door.
“Open up,” I said.
I heard footsteps, and a moment later, she opened the door a crack.
She was breathtakingly beautiful in her gray sweatpants and a beige tank top.
Oh, how I wanted her in my arms right away.
“Why are you here?” she demanded, looking frustrated.
She looked over her shoulder quickly, and I realized there was a buzz in the background.
I put a hand on the door, trying to push it open.
She stood her ground, not letting me in.
I could hear music and the chatter of voices.
Was she having a party?
“What kind of party is this?” I asked, opening the door further as I took a look in.
My eyes roved over the faces of the guests—young kids in their early twenties, who looked very naive and rather taken aback at my presence here.
“Is he a cop?” someone muttered while I slowly swiveled my gaze to Chloe, eyebrows raised.
She swallowed. “This is Henry’s party for his friends,” she said, just as Henry came into view.
He pushed his wheelchair over, his face breaking into a grin when he saw me.
“Will, isn’t it?” he asked, extending his hand to me.
I shook his hand while I gave Chloe a look.
She stared at me for a long, evaluating moment, noticing our handshake and my serious expression before she turned to Henry.
“Actually,” she said, taking a deep breath, “this is Sean. Not Will.”
Henry’s look of shock was plain for everyone to see, and people’s eyes were now drawn to this little scene.
But I was too busy savoring those words.
Too busy watching Chloe with a feeling of pride surging through me.
She didn’t break my gaze as she continued to look at me while she spoke to Henry.
“And he is my boss.”
Chloe’s words were low, but in the sudden silence of the party, with only the dull hum of the music in the background, everyone heard it.
I heard a few gasps and some people mutter from the living room, but I didn’t care.
Out of the side of my eyes, I noticed that Henry’s jaw had dropped.
“Your boss?” he repeated with a gulp, and I turned to him with a smile.
“Yes,” I said, reaching for Chloe’s wrist. “And I need a word with Chloe. Alone. Now.”
Saying that, I pulled her with me to her bedroom.
Giving up, she followed me as I strode up to her room and drew her inside, shutting the door behind her.
I took in her parted lips and the way her wide eyes blazed with fury as she looked back at me.
“What’s with the anger?” I grunted out.
She paused before crossing her arms over her chest. “You don’t show up for work for a few days. Your emails and texts to me are only about work. Like nothing ever happened between us. And then you have the audacity to show up here? Of course I’m mad.”
I leaned in.
“Well, what should I assume when you cut our date short after five glorious hours?” I asked.
She didn’t move from her spot.
Her eyes darted over my face, taking me in.
“It was too much,” she said finally.
“The date?” I asked, wondering if the display of my wealth had put her off.
“I didn’t trust myself. I’m afraid that if I fell asleep with you, if I woke up with you, if I gave you my nights and days, that I might soon fall in love with you. And I don’t want that for myself. I wanted some distance.”
My heartbeat picked up.
She was feeling something too.
And she was scared.
“To be safe from heartbreak?” I asked.
She nodded.
“So, you took the first exit you could?” I asked again.
She was breathing fast, her chest rising and falling rapidly.
“What’s your exit plan now?” I asked, stepping closer.
One moment later, I was crowding her, breathing in her scent.
Her eyes widened, and she took a step back.
“Sean,” she whispered in a warning.
“What is it, baby?” I asked, placing a finger on her chin and tipping it up to look directly into her eyes.
She couldn’t ignore me now.
“I’m afraid,” she said, taking another step back.
“Of me?” I asked.
“No.” She shook her head, holding my gaze.
“Of falling for you.”
It was too late for me.
“Go ahead and fall. You’re safe with me,” I said, wrapping an arm around her waist and drawing her closer to me.
Her soft body pressed against mine, and my own body reacted with a jolt.
Her presence drove me crazy.
Until now, I’d thought it was lust. But I finally knew better.
“You’ll destroy me,” she whispered as I rubbed my thumb on the outline of her lips.
Tracing those deeply sensual, full lips.
“I’d kill myself before I let anyone destroy you,” I whispered.
“Including me.”
She sucked in a sharp breath, and before I knew it, I was crushing my lips to hers, and she was climbing on top of me.
It was madness, how we couldn’t keep our hands off each other.
I kissed her lips, her chin, and her neck, biting and sucking at a tender spot while she threw her head back.
“Oh, Sean,” she said with a sharp intake of breath while I hitched her legs up around my hips while greedily kissing every part of her that I could.
Her lips parted as I kissed her fervently, desperately.
I needed this woman like I needed air, and I couldn’t understand it.
I walked over to her bed and dropped her onto it.
She looked at me with obvious desire and longing before she cast a sideways glance at the bedroom door.
“We can’t, Sean. Even if I want to do this so badly, there’s no way I could keep quiet?—”
I bent down, grazing my fingers down her body as I slowly reached her waistband.
I pulled her pajamas off, pressing my lips to her belly.
“There’s no way in hell I can back off now,” I muttered, tossing her pajamas aside as I ran my fingers up and down her newly exposed legs and thighs.
Her muscles clenched as I neared her core.
I knelt down by the foot of her bed.
I tightened my grip on her legs and pulled her to me.
“Not here, Sean,” she begged with another anxious glance at the door.
“They’ll hear?—”
“I need to be with you right now, Chloe,” I pointed out, as my tongue found her sweet folds and began to tease her swollen clit.
She was wet all right.
“I can’t wait any longer, Chloe. To taste you, to be in you, to feel you come in my arms. Or else I’ll go mad.”
She gasped with ecstasy as I pressed down on her clit, and then her eyes fell shut as her lips parted while I circled one thumb on her sensitive core.
She trembled, her fingers clutching my hair as I cupped her bottom.
She moaned devastatingly when I tongued her wet folds and circled her clit.
“I need you too,” she said breathlessly, her hips rising to meet my mouth better.
“But Henry’s out there?—”
“It’s time he hears how much I adore you,” I muttered.
“Now, stop talking,” I ordered as I resumed flicking my tongue over her.
I teased her mercilessly, occasionally using my teeth to graze her clit and hear her gasp in response.
I loved every single helpless moan and sharp inhale that came from her lips.
I worshipped her over and over, until she came with a cry before covering her mouth with her hand as spasms rocked her body.
When she finally stilled, her breathing calming down, I climbed onto the bed with her.
“I’ve waited all this time to christen this bed with you,” I said huskily, pinning her under me as I took her in my arms.
She came willingly, crushing my lips with hers, the taste of her still on my tongue.
We heard hushed laughter outside and some muttering while we kissed each other hungrily.
“People know what we’re doing,” she managed to say between ravenous kisses while her hands went on either side of my face.
I lifted my head and looked at her.
She looked worried, but I didn’t give her much time to think.
“Can they blame me? Everyone could see how sexy you looked in those pajamas. Now, be quiet,” I responded before kissing her ferociously again.
I reached for her breasts under her tank top, finding her hard nipples and thumbing them.
She moaned in pleasure just as I brought my free hand to her mouth, covering it.
“This is crazy, Sean,” she gasped, but she pulled her top off with my help.
I sat up as I hungrily took my suit off.
The jacket first, then the shirt, followed by my pants.
In a minute, I brought my hand to my cock.
“I don’t want a shred of clothing on you,” I said, pulling her bra off while she obeyed and raised her hands.
The sight of her full breasts, pink nipples, and svelte figure had me so aroused.
I was rock hard.
I climbed on top of her, aligning myself with her pussy before I pushed in.
She reached her hands up tenderly for me, and I put my lips to hers while my thrusts were urgent and deep.
We kissed, opening our mouths to let our tongues in.
She felt so tight and so good as I pushed deeper in her.
Her body clenched around my dick, and I nearly came already.
“Fuck, I forgot the condom.” I froze, prepared to pull out when she drew me closer to her.
“I’m clean, Sean. And I’m on the pill, so it’s okay.”
I looked into her eyes.
I hadn’t been bare with a woman before, and before I could question how I’d let myself come this far, I nodded.
I wanted to be with her with nothing separating us.
I fucked her slowly, keeping our gazes locked.
“I’m clean too,” I said, as I drove deeper into her with each thrust.
My heart was beating wildly, my pulse hammering, and her body was pulsing under mine.
She felt perfect. She was fucking perfect, and I loved possessing her this way.
My body felt tight, my nerves on fire as she clenched around my dick.
“Oh, Chloe,” I said, hoarsely while she brought her legs around my thighs, pulling me deeper in her than I had known was possible.
I could feel the convulsions coming, and I knew I was losing control.
Going by how tight she was, I had stretched and filled her beyond what she was used to.
I angled my body so that I hit her clit with each greedy thrust, and when she came, she cried out my name wildly and helplessly.
She was delicious when she unraveled, and I crushed my lips to hers to muffle her cry.
But it was a second too late.
Everyone outside had to have heard her come, and in a second, my body went taut, and I came inside her.
She held me tight while I spilled into her, biting my lip to control a guttural groan that tore from my throat.
In the few breathless moments that followed, we stared into each other’s eyes.
I leaned forward and kissed her forehead and looked her in the eye.
“You were spectacular,” I said.
She looked back at me with undisguised happiness.
I’d never seen her this happy and this relaxed.
When I was closer, I could see her eyes were sparkling.
“I thought …” She trailed off, biting her lip.
“I thought I’d disappointed you that night.”
“By leaving early,” I corrected.
“Not with anything else. In fact, with everything else”—I brought her hands to my lips and kissed them—“you have far exceeded expectations.”
She sighed with contentment as a rosy blush took over her cheeks.
“Fancy joining the party?” I asked with a wicked grin as I withdrew from her while she put a hand over her mouth, muffling her laugh.
I lay down next to her and stared at the ceiling for a few minutes.
I settled her on my shoulder, draping an arm around her waist, and breathed in her scent.
I felt strangely calm.
“Lucas is back with his mom,” I said, feeling the need to unload all my concerns on her.
When I turned, Chloe was watching me intently.
“It didn’t matter that she got him all the wrong gifts or that she wasn’t prioritizing his favorite activities. He loves her.”
She smiled and gave me a small, knowing look.
“And I now understand how much you were on tenterhooks that night. Ever since you had turned Henry’s request down once already.”
“I know,” she muttered, looking like she was moments away from starting to tremble.
I was reminding her too much of that night, and she wasn’t happy about it.
I pulled her in and gave her a quick kiss.
“I know I pushed you that night to say no to Henry, and you couldn’t do it a second time. It’ll get better with time, I promise. You won’t feel this bad.”
“With time?” she asked.
“With our second date, and the third, and the …”
She cut my words off with a kiss of her own.
“You saw me flee from a perfectly orchestrated date, and you still want me for more dates? I can’t explain how desirable that makes you seem.”
“Don’t,” I said, breaking apart from her and breathing heavily, my eyes on hers.
“I’ll insist on taking you again if you keep talking like that.”
She grinned and pressed her lips against my parted ones once more.
“You can take me as often as you’d like tonight,” she said with a humorous look at the closed door.
“There’s no way I can go out there and face them now.”
The silence in the room was punctuated by a beep as a message lit up Chloe’s phone.
When she lifted her phone, I noticed it had a wallpaper picture of a woman in her early forties.
She checked the message and set her phone aside, looking conflicted.
“Another notification from a recruiter trying to hire me,” she muttered.
Our gazes locked, and I knew what neither of us wanted to say out loud.
Was our time coming to an end?
Would I still see her once she no longer worked for me?
I didn’t know the answer to that question myself, so to distract myself, I asked her a completely different question.
“Who’s the woman on your phone’s lock screen? Is that your mom?” I asked, registering the resemblance between their dimpled smiles.
She nodded as she laid her head on my arm.
“Yes, Mom,” she muttered, trailing her fingers on my shoulder.
The touch sent tingles up my arm, but for once, I was more curious about the story behind the woman in bed with me than I was in my groin.
“She passed when I was barely eight. She had muscular dystrophy. All I remember was her lying down in bed and not being able to move, until …”
I buried my face in her hair and pressed kisses on her head, her cheek, and her lips.
I couldn’t imagine having to deal with the process of losing a parent at that age.
“Did you find out anything more about your dad?” I asked, reading from her silence that I was pushing her into uncomfortable territory.
“You said you were going to meet him soon.”
“Yes,” she breathed heavily.
“I did. I got his address, and I don’t know. I’m debating calling him, and I’m scared. I’m scared that he might say he doesn’t want to meet me. That he would laugh at me when I bring up the idea of him coming to Henry’s graduation.”
I felt an anger bubbling inside me at the idea of Chloe having to doubt her parent’s love for her.
“If you need me to accompany you—” I began, and she nodded.
“I know. I’ll ask if I need it. But I need to do this on my own. Not even with Henry,” she said, her voice faltering.
“It’s the second secret I’ve kept from him.”
I held her tight.
“It’ll be the last,” I promised.
I thought back to an earlier conversation and realized I hadn’t registered some key details back then.
“I know I’ve asked you this before, but when did your dad leave?”
“When I was eighteen,” she replied after a minute’s hesitation.
I frowned.
“That doesn’t make sense,” I muttered.
“Wasn’t that the year he was in the accident?”
She inhaled heavily.
“Yes. He left a few months after Henry’s diagnosis. When the doctors predicted that he couldn’t be mobile again and he’d be confined to a wheelchair, well, my dad said he couldn’t take it again.”
Again.
“He said he wasn’t cut out to be a caretaker for the rest of his life. He didn’t want to go through caring for another … invalid. Like Mom had been before she passed on.” Her voice broke.
“He actually called Henry that.”
“So, he left?” I asked, rubbing my hands over the length of her arms, deciding to take her attention away from this.
Wishing I hadn’t brought this up when it was still hurtful.
She nodded. “He left. And Henry still doesn’t know why.”
“What did you tell him?”
“That I wanted Dad to pay for my tuition at The Juilliard School and Dad refused to do so and left in anger. I would rather Henry think Dad left us because of something I did rather than his condition.”
So, that was the first secret she’d kept from him.
In the silence, she shifted in her position so that her eyes could face the ceiling.
“I still can’t get over it. How could it have been that easy for Dad to give up on his family?”
“It shouldn’t have been,” I said, and I started to feel a sense of doom for her upcoming visit to her dad.
“And you’re Henry’s sole caretaker?”
She nodded.
“Up until he was eighteen. Now that he’s an adult, well, I am still involved in his life. I can’t imagine it being any other way.”
I knew with certainty that Chloe would never give up on Henry.
Looking back, I should have seen that as a warning.