Epilogue Three - Owen Brodie Joke Notebook
THE WEDDING VOWS EDITION
Frankie,
This isn’t going to be very funny.
My life with you—the life we’ve created so far, the life we will be creating together—it’s fun and it’s funny, but it’s no joke. It’s something I take very seriously. Always have. Always will.
Comedians, as you know, are like philosophers.
We’re funny philosophers. But we overthink everything and try to make light of everything because if we don’t we’re just sad, confused people who have no control over anything.
You’re my favorite subject to overthink about.
I also enjoy observing myself in relation to you.
More than anyone, you’ve helped to shape my identity and my voice and my delivery—as a comedian and as a man.
I can’t say that I ever felt lost, exactly. Or maybe I did and I still can’t admit it. But I found the best part of myself when I found you.
I remember that when I met you—the first time we spoke at each other when you heckled me at the comedy club in Tampa and the first time we met face-to-face in LA—despite all the cocky banter, I was afraid I didn’t have enough to offer any woman as a partner.
But it turns out I will always offer you whatever you need because you make me want to be the right man and partner for you.
I will always have more to give you, and there’s always so much I want from you.
You always provide Sam and me with exactly what we need.
You’re the setup and the story arc and the main character and the conflict and the punchline.
Our shopping carts runneth over.
We didn’t show each other our vows as we were writing them in our joke notebooks, but I did just happen to see a page from one of your old joke notebooks when I was carrying a box of them into my house back when you were moving in with me.
I think you know by now that you can always ask me anything, but there’s a question you had a couple of years ago about something. I’m happy to answer it now…
The winking emoticon does mean I like like you.
So does the winking face emoji.
Every emoji and emoticon I use in a message to you, every word I write or say to you means that I like you, Frankie Hogan, very soon to be Frankie Hogan-Brodie.
Because I like you.
I really like you.
And I love you.
A lot.
As a very wise, very young man once said—you’re the only one who makes me smile with my eyes and laugh with my whole face. You make me so happy I don’t even care how weird I look when I laugh really hard.
You’ll always be the headliner and the better half of this asshole comedy duo.
It has been my pleasure to watch you blossom as a comedian and as a writer.
It has been my passion to have you as my lover and my best friend.
It has been my delight to see you care for my son.
It will be my joy and terror to raise the baby who’s growing inside of you.
It’s my great honor to finally marry you.
And I’m going to be the funniest, best-looking, best and only fucking husband you ever have.
With this ring, I thee wed.
I’ll never get over myself, and I will never, ever get over you.