TEN
Charlotte
My brain emptied at the sight of Noah fucking a married woman, and my face heated to a million degrees. I’d seen this redhead before and envied her, but today? Oh, I hated her. Not just because she was clearly cheating on her husband, but because of the man she was doing it with.
He’s supposed to be mine, a bratty voice whined in the back of my mind.
God, I shouldn’t have wanted him anymore. I fucking hated cheaters, and this should have been an enormous bucket of water extinguishing any flame that burned for him.
But it had barely any effect.
Worse, I immediately began to justify what he was doing. He wasn’t technically cheating—he wasn’t even in a relationship with anybody.
As I stared at the writhing couple on the bed, a thousand good reasons to turn and walk away played through my mind. And yet I remained, completely transfixed. The power of them together had an inescapable grip on me.
I wasn’t sure I wanted to escape either.
The sight of them, of him like this, was the sexiest thing I’d ever seen. The redhead was beautiful. She was probably twenty years older than I was, and had a body to die for, one far superior to mine. She was stretched out across the bed, her perfect ass up for him, and there was barely a hint of jiggle as Noah’s hips crashed against her.
His hands were clenched on her so tightly, there were dents in her skin around his fingers, but he needed to hold on like that. It was because his tempo was punishing, unrelenting. The sharp slap of their bodies meeting punched through the air over and over again.
All my blood rushed to the apex of my thighs, and I squeezed against it, causing a deep ache of pleasure.
Shit, why couldn’t I get enough of watching them? I didn’t dare pull my gaze away.
“ Fuck ,” she murmured into the mattress. With the blindfold on, she couldn’t see anything, and it undoubtably forced her to focus on the sensations he caused. It made me so fucking jealous .
Noah was in profile to me, so I could only see one half of his expression, but it was enough that I could tell it was full of determination. The muscles in his toned chest and arms created dips and curves, and my lust swelled so abruptly, I grew lightheaded.
It left me with no choice but to reach out and grab the doorframe to steady myself.
I’d been quiet, but it didn’t matter. The movement must have caught his attention, and his head swung to the doorway. The moment his gaze landed on me, he froze with his dick buried deep inside her. My heart and the rest of the world seemed to stop moving right along with him.
I hadn’t a clue what I looked like in that moment. His expression was full of shock, but there was the faintest hint of something else too. Worry?
Shame?
His wide, unblinking eyes didn’t waver from mine, so he had to notice how I hadn’t moved from my not-so-hidden spot just outside the door. I hadn’t backed away, or turned to run, or even lowered my gaze. My feet were rooted to the ground, and my hand gripping the doorframe tightened until it was white-knuckled.
Without thinking about the consequences, I made it clear to him that I’d been watching.
Did he see the desire roaring through me?
The silent plea for him to show me more ?
His shock faded with each of his slow blinks, and dark heat moved in to take its place. The same thought I had now was wordlessly echoed on his face.
This is fucked up.
But . . . I might be into it.
The woman in front of him rose onto her elbows as she struggled to catch her breath, and even though she wore a blindfold, she turned to face him over one shoulder. “Everything all right?”
Noah flinched at the sound of her voice, like he’d been so deep under my spell, he’d forgotten all about the woman he was currently fucking. His chest lifted as he drew in a heavy breath, but his intense focus remained locked on me. It was as if he couldn’t tear it away.
Oh, my God.
Was he waiting for my permission?
I was reckless, out of control, and gave a small nod before I could think better of it.
“Yes,” he said to both of us, and then began to move again, but his gaze remained locked on mine.
Every long, slow stroke he delivered, I’d swear I could feel inside me. My pulse raced and my knees weakened, and I leaned against the doorframe for more support. I watched his thick cock, glossy from the condom he wore, as it slid inside her, and it created a throbbing ache between my legs.
The intensity of it worsened the longer I watched, the longer our gazes trapped each other’s. It was hard to breathe. Impossible to think. All I could do was stand there, half-collapsed against the doorway, and drown in his lust-soaked eyes.
His body was sheened with sweat, and the flex of his ass as he pumped into her was erotic. His hips moved and rolled, and somehow, I experienced the same flashes of pleasure the woman did, even though he wasn’t touching me.
We were connected, though.
The bratty version of me wanted to brag to her that my connection to Noah was stronger. Deeper. Better.
When he picked up speed, she dropped back down, resting her forehead on the mattress and clenched fistfuls of the sheet beneath her. It must have changed the angle because it threw off his rhythm for a moment. In response, he slipped a hand under the back of her garter belt and closed his fist around it. Then, he turned his hand over, rolling the fabric over the back of his palm and cinching the belt so tight on her, it dug into her skin.
She whimpered with pleasure. “You’re so fucking deep.”
I couldn’t tell if he’d even heard her. He’d resumed his blistering pace without breaking our stare, and his carnal expression caused blood to rush loudly in my ears. He wore an expression like this moment we were sharing was the only thing he desired. Like I was all he wanted.
It was so fucking hot.
The fire of it all drove my feet forward. One after the other, until I was just inside the door and could lean with my back against the wall. It freed my hands to hang loosely at my sides, but one of them didn’t stay there long. It drifted across my thigh, and I wedged it between my legs. I had on a pair of capri length leggings that were soft and thin and clung to me like a second skin, so I didn’t bother wearing anything beneath them.
It meant I could feel every whisper of movement from my hand nestled between my thighs. The side of my thumb brushed against my clit, and I shuddered.
What I was doing was twisted and wrong, touching myself while watching them, but I couldn’t help myself. I was desperate to relieve the ache. And when Noah’s lips parted and his eyes hazed, it told me just how much he approved.
The room became an oven, and it took an enormous amount of effort to drag air in and out of my lungs. Watching what each other was doing took a toll on us. Sweat dampened his temples, and his chest heaved with short breaths.
But he didn’t stop looking at me.
Not even when the woman’s moans swelled, and her legs began to tremble. “That’s it,” she urged. “God, I want to come. Make me come.”
The muscles in his powerful, sexy arm corded as he pulled back on her garter belt. It caused her to bow up off the bed and onto her hands. Her breasts swayed and bounced with each of his violent thrusts, and the image of him fucking her was so scorching, it seared into my mind where I was sure it’d stay forever.
The woman cried out, and her whole body began to quake, leaving no doubt that she’d gotten her wish. As she came, her strangled sounds of ecstasy permeated every inch of the room, filling my body. I ground the side of my hand harder against my clit, sending shocks of pleasure darting down my legs.
The effect of her orgasm was powerful, and he wasn’t immune either. Maybe he’d already been close, or maybe it was a combination of pushing her over the edge while watching me tease myself that did it for him.
His face twisted with enjoyment, and his eyes fell shut.
Perhaps he’d closed them to sever our connection and try to stave off his orgasm, but it didn’t work. Noah’s eyes blinked open, his gaze returned to me, and then he was done for.
He released his hold on her garter belt, gave her a final thrust, and then both his hands clenched her ass. His shoulders contracted, but he held on to her undulating body, chasing her and keeping himself lodged inside. I watched his eyes haze with satisfaction as he stared back at me, and I hoped I hadn’t become too blurry for him in that moment.
I wanted him to think only of me as he came.
His deep groan... it stroked over me like a brush painting pleasure from head to toe. The sensation wasn’t quite enough to push me into orgasm. It was just enough to leave me hanging there on the edge.
The room quieted as their bodies stilled, and the only sound was their labored breathing as they recovered. I wasn’t breathing at all—the hold of Noah’s gaze gripped like a vise.
But then the woman collapsed onto her stomach on the bed and a smile twisted her lips. “Goddamn. I can’t wait to tell my husband how hard you just fucked me.”
Her shocking words tore his focus from me. It snapped to the very beautiful, very married woman in front of him. With his attention gone, I’d been released, and cold, harsh reality crashed into me so rapidly, my knees threatened to buckle.
Oh, God.
I couldn’t stay in this room, not for another second, but the now unwanted desire in my body made me slow. I turned to flee at the same moment the woman hooked a finger beneath the blindfold and tugged it off.
I darted for the hallway, but I wasn’t fast enough. There was no way she hadn’t seen me go.
Noah’s voice rang out behind me as I tore down the hallway. “ Fuck .”
I stumbled recklessly into the kitchen, not stopping until I reached the sink. My hips slammed into the cabinet, and I braced myself against the porcelain basin as I stared out the window, seeing absolutely nothing.
If I’d been able to think, I would have grabbed my cleaning supplies and gotten the fuck out of his house—but I became a statue, too stunned to do anything. I heard him and the woman moving around in his room, while my pulse raced at a breakneck speed, and my face burned like it had caught fire.
Finally, my gaze fell to the faucet.
In the movies, sometimes people would splash cold water on their face to calm or recenter themselves. Should... should I do that now? It’d ruin my makeup, but did I care about that?
I slowly reached out and turned the water on. It poured into the sink and began filling the pan that had been discarded there, the one I hadn’t noticed when I’d been in the kitchen earlier.
It was a familiar task, so I went on autopilot. I grabbed the dish soap and sponge resting beside the sink and got to work scrubbing. I’d just finished when footsteps approached from behind. I didn’t have to see to know it was him.
“Charlotte.” Noah’s voice was quiet and unsure. “I thought we said Wednesday.”
“We did. My plans fell through, and I was around, so I thought...” Rather than face him, I pulled a towel from the nearby drawer and used it to dry the newly clean pan. “I sent you a text about it. When you didn’t respond, I thought that meant you weren’t home.”
“I was,” he paused, searching for the right word, “busy.”
It just popped out. “Yeah, I noticed.”
The tension inside me was so taut, I worried I was going to snap, but instead I turned and finally faced him. He was dressed now, wearing a pair of shorts, a dark green t-shirt, and an unreadable expression.
I was suddenly irrationally angry at everything. With Brianna for canceling the dress fitting. Myself for not going home when he didn’t answer my text. With Noah for what he’d just been doing and who he’d been doing it with.
And most of all, because despite everything, he still looked so damn sexy to me.
My tone was harsher than any chemical in my cleaning arsenal. “You think her husband likes that you’re fucking his wife?”
“Yes.” There was no hesitation and no guilt. “He’s the one who asked me to.”
A needle dragged across a record in my brain. “Wait. What?”
He rubbed a hand over his jaw, making his whiskers brush quietly against his fingertips. “You remember how I told you I don’t do traditional relationships?”
I didn’t get a chance to answer because the woman, who was now dressed, appeared. She strolled over to stand beside Noah and flashed a friendly, reassuring smile.
It made my face burn even hotter, only this time with embarrassment. My gaze dropped to the island countertop. “I’m sorry,” I mumbled, “for walking in on you. I didn’t think anyone was home.”
Her laugh was light and warm. “Oh, honey, don’t worry about it.” Her casual tone drew my focus up, and when my gaze met hers, she pulled her lips into a provocative smile. “I don’t mind being watched. In fact, I love it.” She glanced over at him. “Maybe Patrick could watch next time.”
Was that her husband? The one who’d asked Noah to sleep with his wife?
He didn’t look like he knew what to say, so the only acknowledgement he gave was a tight nod.
With that settled, the woman glanced at the screen of her phone. “He’s about to pull up out front.” She put a hand on Noah’s shoulder. “Thanks. You were great.” And then she leaned in and dropped a chaste kiss on his cheek. “You’ll definitely be hearing from us again.”
I stood, dumbfounded. Was she going to climb into her husband’s car and then rate her afternoon with Noah?
Performance was great! Five stars.
He continued to look at a loss for words and stood motionless, his gaze locked on me. When she turned to leave, he came back to life.
“I’ll walk you out,” he said.
While I was alone in the kitchen, I stared at my bucket of cleaning supplies and urged myself to move. This was my chance to escape this awkward situation, and yet, I didn’t want to. I had so many questions I was dying to ask.
So I remained by the sink, waiting for his return. I heard the front door open and then close, and the slow footsteps that led him back to the kitchen. When he reappeared, he seemed unsettled and raked his hand through his already messy hair.
I did my best to keep my tone light and teasing. “For a guy who just got laid, you look really uncomfortable.”
He set his hands wide on the island and leaned over it as he considered something. His expression abruptly shifted to one that loudly read fuck it . “Have you heard the term ‘bull’ before?”
Was this a stockbroker thing? “As in, a bull market?”
He shook his head. “As in, a single male swinger.”
My breath caught.
“Swinger,” I repeated.
“Do you know what that means?” He asked it earnestly.
“I think so.” The tension inside me tightened like a screw get another full turn of a screwdriver. “It’s, uh, couple swapping. And maybe group stuff.”
The moment the words were out, it charged the air between us. Heat smoldered in his eyes. “Yes.”
“But you don’t have anyone to swap.” I’d blurted it without thought, and it came out sounding like I was sad about that. As if I was about to volunteer myself.
He gave a faint smile. “I don’t have to have a partner. Anyone who enjoys casual sex, with multiple people, can call themselves a swinger. And any of those people can be inside or outside of a relationship.”
I straightened away from the sink, taking a step closer to him. “You mean, like an open marriage?”
“It could be, but more likely it’s ENM.” When I made a face, he added, “Ethical non-monogamy. It means everyone is consenting to the sex, even if they’re not participating in it.”
He studied me, gauging my reaction, and must have seen I still didn’t get it.
“Patrick dropped Shannon off at my place,” he said, “fully aware of what was going to happen. Hell, he wanted it to happen. Don’t you think that means he consents to it?”
Like he’d done to me, I asked it earnestly. “Sure, but why?”
“Why’d he give his consent?”
I shook my head. I wasn’t trying to judge; I was just too damn curious. “Why’d he want you to fuck his wife?”
He considered my question for a long moment. “I don’t want to speak for him, but I’m guessing because it turns him on.” Did Noah feel the urge to defend the guy? His expression was serious. “It’s not because he’s weak, or can’t give his wife what she needs, if that’s what you’re thinking.”
“I wasn’t—”
“Believe me, he’s not weak. If anything, this arrangement shows just how strong and confident he is. How rock-solid their marriage is . He doesn’t need to flex ownership of his partner or their relationship. In fact, he’s secure enough he doesn’t even need to be involved.”
I blinked and processed what he’d said. Maybe he couldn’t interpret what I was thinking, or I’d looked skeptical to him, because Noah frowned.
“You don’t agree?”
“No, no, I do.” I took another step toward him, and I hoped I sounded as genuine as I felt. “I never would have thought about it like that, but you make a good point.”
His frown evaporated and he shifted on his feet, subtly leaning closer to me. Like my answer had pleased him.
I gazed up at him through new eyes. I only had sex when I had enough trust or was in love with my partner, and he was the opposite. Our preferences weren’t any less valid than the other’s, so I didn’t have any room to judge.
Plus, I’d be lying to myself if I said his lifestyle wasn’t fascinating as fuck.
“How did you meet them? I mean, if it’s okay to ask.” I swallowed a breath. “You don’t have to answer.”
He didn’t look offended. “There’s a club here in Nashville.”
Even though we were alone in his kitchen, I whispered it like it was a secret. “A club? Like, a sex club?”
He nodded. “I met them at the bar my first night there, and we got to talking about what they were looking for.” He reached up to massage the back of his neck. “Actually, the night you and I met, that was my first date with them.”
Surprise coursed through me. “You’re dating both of them?”
“No. Well, not in the way you think of dating.” He must have felt the urge to clarify. “I’m straight and he is too, so we don’t play physically with each other. But I treat them as a unit. A partnership. I wouldn’t do anything with Shannon that he hasn’t fully signed off on, and I don’t talk to her without him.”
“But... you’ll fuck her without him.” I jolted. “God, I hope that didn’t sound judgmental, because I didn’t mean it to. I’m just...” I trailed off, unsure of what to say.
“Trying to wrap your head around it?”
Relief swelled inside me. “Yeah, exactly.”
“I’m sure it goes without saying, but if we could keep this between us...”
“For sure.” I nodded enthusiastically, trying to convey how much I understood this wasn’t my secret to share.
His shoulders relaxed, and that same pleased look he’d given before crossed his expression. Fuck, it did things to me.
Except I didn’t want it to. I was already so uncomfortably turned on.
“Gotta tell you, Charlotte.” His warm gaze was inescapable. “You’re full of surprises.”
Was he kidding? In comparison to him, I felt as plain and vanilla as they came. “Me?”
“Yeah, you.” He had no idea how seductive his soft tone was—or maybe he did. “You’re not acting like you think what I just told you or what happened back there in my room was wrong.”
“I don’t think it was wrong.” The air in the room went thin, and I said it in a hush. “I thought it was hot.”
“See? Surprising .” He moved closer, like he was being drawn to me. “How long did you stand there, watching us?”
“I was mostly watching you,” I admitted.
“Because you were jealous?”
“I’m not sure that’s the right word. Envious, I guess. And a little bit angry.”
He froze. “Angry?”
“At the situation.” I set a hand on my hip and decided to lay everything out there. “I want you, Noah.” My bitterness bubbled to the surface when I put it into words. “I want you, but I can’t have you, and that pisses me off.”
He exhaled loudly, and it was like he’d been holding that breath in for the last month. “Yeah?” His expression mirrored the way I felt. “You should know it pisses me off, too.”