Chapter 12
Chapter Twelve
LUCA
It’d been a struggle to pretend I wasn’t performing for Ollie. To keep myself down at the other end of the stage, knowing the one I really wanted watching me was within reach.
That was the smart thing to do. Jack’s warning rattled around in my brain, clashing obnoxiously with the memory of Kevin’s suspicious face as he’d eyed Ollie and me during the sound check.
I got on okay with our manager, but ever since he’d switched Arlo’s and my security detail, I’d been cautious. I’d even gone to Arlo to ask if he wanted us to find new management, but he’d been adamant the switch was what he wanted.
If any of us had learned otherwise, we would’ve fired Kevin in a heartbeat. He was here to manage our business, not our personal lives. He already interfered too much for my liking, but there was a line he didn’t cross…as far as we knew.
Since Arlo was insistent that nothing like that had happened, we’d let it go.
But with what had occurred today, my hackles were raised. Ollie was understandably concerned about protecting his job and reputation, and I respected that.
What Ollie didn’t know was just how secure his job was. He could rock up to the office two hours late every day and not even get a disciplinary.
I couldn’t tell him how I knew that though…not without confessing what I’d done. Why I’d done it was beyond me. I knew he thought he still would’ve missed his chance without me making him even later, but I couldn’t live with that on my conscience.
But I didn’t want him getting a bad rep as a journalist. If it got out he was fucking around with someone he was writing a story on, that would have repercussions even my long reach couldn’t take care of.
When “Tease” had come on, a light had flicked briefly over Ollie’s face, illuminating his expression.
Hunger.
Yearning.
Desperation.
I couldn’t help myself.
Sauntering over, I’d stopped right in front of him and dropped to my knees.
At this point, it had to be a familiar sight for him, but the way his mouth dropped open like it was the first time made lust roar through me.
The height of the stage put my crotch at his eye level.
I ran my hands down my body and gyrated my hips, keeping my eyes on him the whole time.
Did he know I was imagining fucking him?
Given how his pupils were blown and his chest heaved, he had to have some idea.
And by the looks of it, those ideas had to be good.
When my fingers danced over the button to my leather trousers, Ollie’s gaze cut up to mine in alarm. I bit back a chuckle. No, I wasn’t about to flash a stadium of fans, not even to impress Ollie. But it was cute that he worried.
Winking at him, I jumped to my feet and returned to the other end of the stage. Kai raised an eyebrow at me, but his attention was quickly diverted when Silas chose that moment to lean in close to share his mic. Their bodies pressed together, and Kai forced an easy grin.
I was the only one who could see it was fake as fuck…well, me and Arlo, given the way our drummer scowled and hit the high hat a touch too aggressively.
Kai was dying inside. If he didn’t do something about this situation soon, it would affect the rest of us.
Speaking of not letting things affect us, I spent the rest of the show pretending Ollie didn’t exist. It was either that or yank him on stage so I could dance all up on him and feel his hands on me.
Yeah, that wouldn’t make this situation better.
After the show, there was the usual meet-and-greet for fans who’d purchased VIP tickets. Jack arrived, but Ollie was nowhere to be seen. I raised an eyebrow at him in question just to get a shrug in response.
Was he hiding from me again?
I thought something had passed between us when I’d been on stage…
but maybe I’d been wrong. Honestly, this whole arrangement was starting to feel like a fuck-up.
Yes, Ollie and I had connected that day in the lift.
But that was a long time ago. If Ollie didn’t feel the same as I did, there was no point in pursuing this.
A chilling thought occurred to me as I reflected on the hungry way Ollie had watched me on stage. What if Ollie wanted to use me to…experiment? After all, he hadn’t said anything about being with other guys since me. What if he was looking for a fling while I was after a relationship?
I kept my smile up for my fans, but my mood darkened the longer the night stretched on. By the time I let myself into my hotel room, I had plans that involved my hand and a bottle of Jack Daniels.
Closing the door behind me, I flicked on the light and froze.
I wasn’t alone.
Perched on the edge of the table was Ollie. He’d unbuttoned the top of his shirt, and I couldn’t help but linger on the skin and hair revealed there. He was smirking, but there was an underlying nervous current to it. Like he was aiming for confidence but got lost on the way.
“Didn’t realise breaking and entering were on the syllabus at journalism school.”
Ollie’s lips twitched. “I wouldn’t know. Didn’t go to journalism school.”
“How’d you get in here?”
Ollie lifted his hand, showing my room key clasped between his fingers. “Jack.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Jack gave you a key.”
“In a manner of speaking.” Ollie tilted his head to the side. “Would it surprise you to know I was something of a pickpocket back in the day?”
I surveyed Ollie from head to toe, taking in everything from his Oxfords to his pristine white button-down. “Umm…yeah. Kind of.”
“Let’s just say I didn’t have the best upbringing. I’m not proud of it, but sometimes the difference between having food or going without was how many pockets I picked.”
A chord struck in my chest. I took a step closer. “You’re not the only one who grew up poor.”
He gave me a small smile. “I know. I read an interview you gave about it a few years ago.”
I lifted my chin. “Council estate, born and raised. Mum still lives there. I offered to buy her a house anywhere, but she didn’t want to move from there. She has a community around her. So, I bought her house from the council instead.”
Ollie studied me. “You’re a good son.”
I shrugged self-consciously. “It’s no more than she deserves. In her words, she’d rather have three cruises a year than a swanky pad.”
We laughed softly before the sound ebbed away, leaving something heavier in its place as we stared at each other.
“Why are you here, Ollie?”
His fingers twitched against the table. “Is it okay that I am?”
“Yes.” My voice dropped an octave. “But that’s not what I asked.”
Ollie’s eyes cut to the side as he blew out a breath. “I’m not…I’m not good at this.”
“This?” I took a step closer, my heart in my throat as I voiced my fear about being an experiment for him. “What, being with a man?”
“No. Well, technically, yes, that’s new too. But I meant more…”
His voice trailed off as I shrunk the distance between us. I was now standing between his thighs, my legs brushing against his. “More what?”
“Talking. Emotions. That sort of shit.”
I put a finger under his chin, tilting his face upwards. “Is that why you came here? To talk?”
He swallowed. “No.”
I ran my thumb over his bottom lip. He parted them obediently, his tongue tentatively flitting over the pad before sucking it in.
Fuck me. What I wouldn’t give to feel him do that to the head of my cock. Removing my hand, I stroked down until it came to rest loosely around his throat. “What do you want, Ollie?”
“Everything. I want it all.”
Our mouths clashed together like his words were a starting pistol.
There was nothing delicate about this kiss.
It was a brutal, desperate coming together.
My hand tightened around his neck as the other wound in his hair.
His hands roamed over me like he couldn’t decide what he wanted to touch first.
Ollie tried to pull me down into his lap, but I had other ideas. Without breaking the kiss, I half lifted, half shoved Ollie until his back hit the table.
Crawling on top of him, I blanketed his body with my own. Our kisses were hungry, a fucking mess of lust and need. I ground against Ollie’s groin, making him kick his foot out with a curse. Something crashed to the floor, but we ignored it.
Breaking from Ollie’s lips, I kissed my way down his chest, my hands tearing his shirt open. Buttons pinged off in every direction.
“I’ll buy you another,” I mumbled between kisses. “As many as you like.”
“I don’t care,” Ollie gasped, shoving on my shoulders to get me to rise. “Get fucking naked. Now.”
Another time I might’ve made a quip about his bossiness. Not now. Not when he looked at me like I was the answer to a question he thought he’d never solve.
He lifted himself from the table, shoving off his shirt before helping me tear off my own. “Faster, faster,” he chanted.
Blood pounded through my head as we tore at our clothes like animals. I couldn’t remember ever feeling this desperate. There was nothing finessed about it.
Just carnal need driving us, making us think of nothing but touching.
Finally, we were naked. I didn’t waste a second, dropping back down on Ollie and seeking out his lips. His hairy calves tangled with my own, his big arms coming up to wrap around me, pulling me tighter.
He was holding me so close that, with anyone else, it would’ve felt suffocating.
Not with Ollie.
I felt protected. Cherished.
Safe.
Small whimpers broke free from his lips as we rutted together. In the back of my mind, I worried about how Ollie might feel about getting naked with me. It was one thing to let a guy blow you. It was another thing entirely to strip off and rut against him.
It didn’t seem to be a problem though. Given how Ollie’s hand was now caressing my arse, his fingers flirting with my crease, he was up for taking it further too.
I shifted my right leg upwards in an attempt to give Ollie the access he needed. A loud creak had us freezing before chuckles broke free.
“Let’s move this to the bed,” I said, kissing the end of Ollie’s nose.
“Okay,” he said, almost shyly. His mouth twitched like he wanted to add something else but was holding it back.
“You sure?”
He nodded, his smile growing. “Sure.”
Sliding off the table, I ran into the bathroom to grab a condom and some lube. When I returned, Ollie was reclined on the bed, his hand lazily tugging his cock.
I held my goods up to Ollie. “Am I being presumptuous?”
“Fuck no,” he rasped. “Only question is, who’s going to wear it.”
I paused. “Is that…do you…?”
“You know, I would’ve thought a Grammy award-winning songwriter would have an easier time coming up with words.”
I scowled as I straddled him. “Can’t blame me for being thrown. We haven’t…talked about it. Guys who are experimenting aren’t usually volunteering to be the one getting dicked down.”
Ollie rolled me in one movement so he was the one on top, glaring at me. His fury was as palpable as his desire. “You’re not an experiment, Luca. I’m right here in this with you, and I want to try everything. Are you in this with me?”
Okay, I’ll admit it. Ollie being all domineering was definitely working for me. “Yes.”
“Good.” He leaned down to nibble along my jawline. “Now, I might not have done this with a man before, but I’m nothing if not a quick study.”
“Wait.” I grabbed his hair, using it to pull his head up so I could see him. “You haven’t been with another guy since me?”
“No, Luca. I haven’t been with anyone since you.”
Then his mouth was on mine, erasing all my conscious thoughts. I wanted to tell him that I hadn’t been with anyone either. But he might think that was weird. After all, he’d been getting over a long-term relationship.
What was my excuse? I couldn’t admit to him that the only thing I’d gotten off to since that day was the memory of his face as he came undone under my mouth.
He’d take out a restraining order. I certainly had for far less than that.
Ollie’s hand circled around my cock, and I inhaled sharply.
“Huh,” he said, sounding dazed. “It feels different.”
My lips twitched. “Because it’s not attached to you?”
Ollie rolled his eyes. “No, prick. I’ve had a lot of time to imagine this, and…it’s not what I expected.”
“In a bad way?”
“In the best way.”
With a growl, I rolled us again so I could pin Ollie underneath me. Precum was sticky between us. I had no idea who it was coming from, and I didn’t care. “How do you want to do this? I’m vers, so I’m happy with either.”
Ollie’s hand grabbed my cock again, his thumb toying with my foreskin. “Can I top? You’re…bigger than I expected.”
I gave a mock gasp. “You’re telling me you didn’t look me up on the internet?”
Ollie’s blush gave me away. “Well…not your nudes. Everything else, yes. But no, I wouldn’t do that.”
That was…surprisingly refreshing. Especially given how many of them had been leaked over the years. Maybe my standards were on the floor after over a decade in the limelight, but the fact Ollie purposefully hadn’t sought them out made me fall for him a little more.
“You can have a whole album full of my nudes if you like.” I stroked my hand along his chin, enjoying how his five o’clock shadow bristled under my fingertips. “Just say the word, and I’ll be your muse.”
Ollie’s face softened and he pulled me down for a tender kiss. This was as good as the furious desperation of earlier, but in a different way. Before, he’d kissed me like it was his one and only chance.
Now, he was taking his time, like he knew there’d be many more opportunities in future.
I wouldn’t lie. I knew which one I preferred.
Words I couldn’t yet speak bubbled up within me. Not wanting to send Ollie running, I distracted myself by grabbing the lube and clicking the cap open.
“What are you doing?”
“Umm, prep?” Just how little did Ollie know about anal sex?
He rolled his eyes. “I know what you’re doing. I meant, why are you doing it instead of me?”
“Oh,” I said stupidly, holding out the bottle to him. “I didn’t realise.”
Ollie squirted some lube onto his fingers like a pro, his hand immediately wrapping around me to seek out my hole. He stroked and probed the puckered skin tentatively like he was testing what to do.
It was nice that he was being gentlemanly, but I was done with waiting. If we took too long, he might start having doubts. He was telling me he wanted this, but I couldn’t help but worry that he’d change his mind any second.
I’d rather he do that after I’d had him inside me. At least then, I’d have this memory to look back on. I pushed back on his hand, continuing until his finger was knuckle deep.
“Oh my god,” Ollie moaned. “You’re so tight. How the fuck am I supposed to fit in there?”
“You will.” I chuckled, bending to kiss him and open myself up more. “And it’s going to blow your fucking mind.”