Chapter Twenty-Three
SILAS
Kai’s eyes widened slightly. “Umm…what were you thinking?”
I grinned at him as I gripped his shaft firmer. “Hmm. Not sure. We could throw around some new lyrics. Perhaps play around with some of the melodies from earlier.”
Kai hissed as I thumbed his slit, marvelling at the stickiness there. “Or, you could fuck me.”
Kai’s cock throbbed as he gave a low moan. “Jesus.”
“Just Silas,” I quipped. “Now, where did we land on the fucking?”
He gave me an incredulous look. “Hang on, you’ve been into men for—what? Five minutes? And now you’re ready to go all the way? It’s a bit sudden.”
“Cheeky fucker. You should know that I like to throw myself into the deep end.” I took a deep breath as I met his gaze. “Besides, this doesn’t feel sudden. It feels like we’ve been building to this the whole time.”
I could tell Kai was wavering. I reached up to kiss him.
“Please,” I whispered brokenly against his lips. “I need this. I need to feel you inside me.”
Kai cursed under his breath. “I don’t have any supplies.”
I pulled back to scowl at him. “Since when are you ever unprepared?”
He rolled his eyes. “I don’t go fucking other men often, Si. Seems kinda wrong when I’m always pretending they’re you.”
“That shouldn’t make me as happy as it does.”
“I can get you off like this,” Kai offered, palming me through my jeans.
It was tempting. Especially with the skilled way he was massaging me through the denim. But it wasn’t enough. I didn’t know why it was so important, but right now, I needed Kai inside me. I needed to know that he was mine in the most primal way.
I was burning. I needed Kai to douse the flames.
“Who packed that?” I gestured to the bag Kai had pulled the Maltesers from earlier.
“Arlo. Why?”
“Excellent.” I shoved Kai away and rummaged through it. Triumph leapt in my chest as my hand fell on a small tube. “I knew it.”
A second more, and I had the other item we needed. I held them up to Kai with a smirk. “He’s a determined little fucker.”
“We need to take him out to dinner,” Kai said, snatching the lube from my hand. His gaze flicked to the condom, and he swallowed. “We can use that if you’d feel more comfortable, but I’m negative. I haven’t been with anyone in over a year.”
My breath caught in my chest. Fuck, I wished I could say the same. Wished I’d waited for Kai.
Or, better yet, I wished I’d woken up and had this realisation years ago.
“I’m negative too,” I said. “I got tested after the end of the tour.”
His mouth popped open. “You…you haven’t been with anyone since…”
“Since we kissed?” I stepped up to him, unbuttoning his shirt. I didn’t want anything between us. “Of course not, Kai. You’ve possessed me. I can’t even think about being with anyone else. I was lost from the second you put your mouth on mine. Maybe even before that.”
“Silas.” It was a plea and a prayer all at once.
I shoved his shirt to the floor, ripping mine off after. The rest of our clothes fell alongside them as we were driven by an urgency we couldn’t ignore.
Then we were naked. My eyes trailed down Kai’s body, mapping the lines I’d seen a thousand times before but never actually noticed. I’d been too distracted in the shower.
I wasn’t distracted now.
His broad shoulders rose and fell rapidly, his chest expanding with panting breaths. God, I wanted to run my tongue over his nipples. And down his abs. All the way to the happy trail leading to his cock.
His very hard, very sizable cock. My mouth dried out as I imagined it inside me. Filling me up. Ever since the day I’d first watched the gay porn, I’d been thinking about how it might feel.
Kai’s cock was several significant steps up from a slender finger. It didn’t scare me though. It probably should, given it was bigger than anything I’d tried before…but fuck. I wanted it.
Don’t get me wrong, I would’ve craved it regardless of his size. It was Kai. I wanted him.
But I wouldn’t deny that him packing significant heat was appealing.
Never thought I’d be a size queen. Kai was teaching me all sorts of new things about myself.
“We don’t have to do this,” Kai said gently, misunderstanding the way I was gaping at him. “We can do other things. Lots of other things.”
“Oh, and we will,” I rasped, wrapping my hand back around him. “But those things can wait. I want you inside me. Right now. Don’t make me wait.”
My words unlocked something in Kai. With a snarl, he grabbed the back of my neck and hauled me to him. There was nothing gentle about it. Our teeth clashed together as he consumed me. We were almost wrestling with each other, like we were trying to physically climb inside the other.
My back crashed into the wall, Kai pinning me against it.
“Make you wait,” he snarled between kisses. “Fuck, Si. I’ve waited for you for decades.”
I groaned as he shoved two of his fingers into my mouth. “Suck, baby. Get them nice and wet. Because I’m not waiting a second longer.”
I did as he instructed, laving my tongue over the digits. I sucked hard, imagining his cock in its place. Its heavy weight on my tongue. Choking my throat.
My cock throbbed against Kai’s thigh. I needed to calm down. I hadn’t been this close to the edge with such little stimulation since I was a teenager.
Being with Kai was breaking down all my control.
“That’s it, baby,” Kai praised me, nibbling along my neck and jawline. “Suck me hard. Like I did to you in the shower.”
My eyes rolled back in my head, and I was grateful for the wall at my back holding me up. Just the mention of what he’d done to me in the shower had my spine tingling.
“Did you like that?” He breathed in my ear. His hips undulated slowly against mine, his cock snagging deliciously on my abs. “Me on my knees? Pinning you in place and making you fuck my throat?”
He pulled his fingers from my mouth, allowing me to gasp out a response. “Jesus, Kai. How didn’t I know that you’re into dirty talk?”
“Feels like you’re into it too.” He smirked wickedly as he grabbed my cock and stroked it. “There’s a lot you’re going to learn about me, Si. I can’t wait to teach you.”
I bucked under his ministrations. “Fuck, I am here for all of it.”
“Good,” he whispered. “Now turn around and put your hands on the wall. You’re going to keep them there while I work you open.”
I moved so fast I went dizzy and stumbled.
Kai snorted a laugh. I scowled at him over my shoulder.
“Sorry,” he said, grinning affectionately. “You’re just such a clumsy prick sometimes.”
“You shouldn’t be surprised by that,” I grumbled, bracing my forearms against the wall as instructed.
He ran his slick fingers along my crease, making me shiver. “I’m not. It’s just…this is such a big moment, you know? I’ve imagined you like this so many times.” A finger slipped between my cheeks and danced over my hole. “Bent over, ready and waiting for me. It’s a lot.”
The wobble in his voice had me looking back over my shoulder, my concern for him overriding my horniness. “You okay, Kai?”
He cleared his throat and smiled broadly. “Better than okay. You being a clumsy little shit reminded me that it’s you. It’s you and me.”
I softened. “It’s always been me and you. This won’t change that. Just makes it more fun.”
“Much more fun,” he drawled, slightly dipping his finger in. “Want me to get the lube?”
“Not yet.” I panted. It might sound weird, but I liked that he was working me open with nothing more than my own saliva. We’d have to grab the lube eventually, but for now, this was good. “Keep going.”
Kai pressed close to my back, kissing my shoulders. “Just tell me if you need to stop. There’s no rush.”
“Yes, there is. If I don’t get you inside me soon, I might die.”
Kai’s barked laughter had me smiling despite myself. “School was wrong. You definitely had the drama skills to play at least tree number two.”
I tensed as he slid his finger slightly deeper, my body bucking at the intrusion.
“I love you, but I’m using the lube,” Kai said matter-of-factly.
I wanted to complain but didn’t. I knew how stubborn Kai was and given his size…yeah. Lube was probably the best plan.
His finger was cooler when it slipped back inside, this time with more noticeable ease. I still couldn’t help tensing against the unfamiliar sensation.
“Relax. Breathe out and bear down.” Kai’s deep voice rumbled over me. “Let me in, baby.”
Blowing out, I concentrated on following his instructions. His finger slipped in a few more inches as my body opened for him.
I couldn’t imagine being in this situation with anyone else. A few months ago, I never would’ve imagined that I’d be naked and about to be fucked against the wall of a recording studio.
But this was Kai. Nothing I did with him would or could ever feel anything other than perfectly right.
I really should’ve spotted my feelings sooner.
Kai’s hand moved and a second finger joined the first. I focused on my breathing as Kai whispered praise in my ear.
Then he crooked his fingers and brushed against something.
My eyes flew open as all my nerve endings fired. “Oh fuck!”
“Hmm, you like that, do you?” Kai murmured. “Let’s check again and see.”
He did it again. My cock, which had been softening under all the unusual sensations, was suddenly rock hard. I thrust forwards, the head of my cock catching on the soundproof material covering the walls.
He did it a third time. “Kai!”
“Oh, you definitely like that.” I was thrusting back on his fingers now, desperately seeking out the feeling. “We’ll make a greedy bottom of you yet, Si.”
I whimpered. “Please, fuck me.”
“Not yet. This might feel good, but you aren’t ready for me yet.”
Despite knowing he was speaking facts, decades of friendship meant I couldn’t resist ragging on him a little. “Someone’s a bit full of himself.”
Kai didn’t rise to the bait, simply chuckling as he added another finger. “Well, shortly, you’ll be full of me. And then we’ll both know I was right to take the prep seriously.”