Chapter twenty Parker #2
“I know you do, but it wasn’t your job to fix her, Parker.
She pulled away from you just as much as you did to her.
She needed help, and you gave her that chance when you encouraged her to go to rehab.
But she made the choice to leave, to drink, to drive.
None of that was on you. You loved her enough to let her go, Parker, and that love gave her a second chance at a better life—for her and for you.
She’s the one who chose not to take it.”
I pull my mother into my chest, inhaling deeply and exhaling guilt and lies as I breathe out. “I love you, Mom.”
“I love you too, son. I’m so proud of the young man you are and that you’re dealing with your past to have a chance at a better future.”
“Thank you.” When my mom releases me, a pinch in her brow develops. “What?”
“If this whole engagement was Cashlynn’s idea, what was in it for her?”
“Let’s just say that not everyone’s parents are as understanding as you,” I reply. “But make sure you don’t have any plans on Saturday. We have a gallery opening to attend.”
And then I tell my mother everything, and she helps me figure out exactly what I need to do next.
***
“Parker?” Cashlynn sits up on the couch as soon as I walk in the house later that evening. She rubs the tiredness from her eyes and blinks, focusing on me as I make my way over to her.
“Hey, sweetheart.” I take a seat next to her on the couch, pressing a kiss to her forehead. “Sorry I kept you waiting tonight.”
She sits up, covering her mouth as she yawns. “It’s okay. I can’t believe I fell asleep out here.”
“Well, you’ve been working yourself hard these past few weeks getting ready for the opening on Saturday.”
“I know, but I barely closed my eyes and the next thing I knew you were walking through the door.” She glances at the clock on the wall. “It’s after eight already?”
“Yeah.” Pushing a hand through my hair, I take my glasses off and set them on the coffee table, preparing to tell her everything I’ve been holding back.
“Uh oh. The glasses are coming off,” she teases. “Is everything okay?”
I look her straight in her amber eyes, hoping like hell that what I’m about to say doesn’t destroy us. “I just came from your dad’s house.”
Her spine straightens. “What? Why?”
“I told him everything, Cashlynn.”
She leaps from the couch and clutches her hands to her chest. “Are you serious? Please tell me you’re joking!”
Looking up at her, I say, “No, sweetheart. I’m being completely honest with you.”
Her hands cover her mouth, and her eyes are wide as she stares down at me. “Why on earth would you do that without even talking to me about it, Parker?”
“Because if I didn’t, Seth was going to.”
She squints at me now, her expression hardening in an instant. “So to save yourself, you jeopardized everything that I’ve been working toward for the past three months?”
I stand now, not wanting her to run from what I’m going to say. Reaching out to her, I place my hand on her upper arm, but she swats me away. “Cashlynn…”
“No, Parker.” Her voice cracks as tears fill her eyes. “How could you?”
“I know you can’t see it right now, but this was the best thing to do. Your father deserved the truth, not the half-assed version that Seth was likely to give him, and now he won’t make a scene on Saturday if he shows up.”
A tear slides down her cheek. “I thought…”
I reach out to her again, hating to see the pain and betrayal filling her eyes, but she steps away from me this time, putting even more space between us. “I’m sorry. I know you asked me not to, but I did what I thought was best.”
“Yeah, what was best for you.”
“No, for us. He knows everything, and now he can decide if he will support you in this decision. In the real decision. I couldn’t stand by while he kept hurting you, Cashlynn.
I told him because I refuse to watch you crumble under fear of his judgment any longer.
I’m asking you to trust me, sweetheart. Please… ”
“You’re asking me to trust you, but you won’t even trust me enough to tell me what the hell happened in your last relationship!
” Her words sting, but they’re true.“Telling my dad was not your choice to make, Parker.” She starts to walk away from me, down the hall to her room, but I follow her because we are not done talking.
I’m not done convincing her that this was the right choice, that I only had her best interests at heart.
“I’m involved in these lies too, Cashlynn.” She steps inside her room, and I trail her closely. Reaching inside the closet, she grabs a duffle bag and starts stuffing it with clothes. “Where are you going?”
“I don’t know. I just…I can’t be around you right now.”
I grab her arm and turn her to face me. “Look at me, Cashlynn.”
Her eyes are brimming with tears and her face is starting to turn red. Fuck, I hate seeing her like this, so hurt, so torn up because I wanted to prevent her from hurting further.
After I talked to my mom, I decided to tell Robert immediately, to give him time to process everything before the gallery opening on Saturday.
That way, if he does show up, he’ll have had time to cool down so maybe he can be open to what she’s created for herself.
Hopefully Beth, who was at his house when I showed up, can smack some sense into him.
The two of them have some things to admit to Cashlynn themselves, but now’s not the time to bring that up.
“I heard your father on the phone with you earlier today.” That gets her attention.
“I heard him telling you that he was disappointed that you lied to him, so I ambushed him when he ended the call and sort of went off on him without knowing exactly what he was talking about.” I smooth my hand down the side of her face.
“He found out I never talked to Timothy McDonald about a job like I said I would…”
I nod, also knowing the truth about that now.
“Regardless of what you were talking about, the fact that you can’t tell him anything without fear of his reaction is bullshit, Cashlynn.
I told him that he should be supporting you, not tearing you down.
He didn’t like it, of course, but I told him that if standing up for you meant losing the practice, so be it.
I don’t want it if it comes at your expense. ”
Her lips part, stunned. “You said that to him?”
“Yes.” My voice is steady, though my heart is pounding. “I don’t give a shit about the practice anymore, Cashlynn. Truth be told, I’ve been questioning it for a while.”
“What made you come to that conclusion?”
I swallow roughly and say, “My therapist.”
She takes a step closer to me. “You’ve been seeing a therapist?”
“Yeah. Those Monday night appointments? I was seeing her.” I release her as she steps back from me again, her eyes bouncing all over my face.
“Why couldn’t you have just told me that?” she asks as more tears build in her eyes. “I’ve been wondering for weeks what you’ve been keeping from me, convincing myself that you wouldn’t cheat on me, or…”
Cupping the side of her face, I say adamantly, “I would never be unfaithful to you. I didn’t want to tell you until I could work through some shit. Because I knew you’d have questions that I wouldn’t have answers to yet. But I do now. I’ve realized a lot…”
“But you lied to me, and then you betrayed me by going to my dad when I asked you not to!” Turning her back to me again, she grabs a few more pieces of clothing from the closet and then moves to go around me, but I block the door, holding my hands out to cross the door jamb. “Move, Parker.”
“Don’t leave. We need to talk about this.”
Her lips are trembling. “I’m leaving because I trusted you.
I was patient these past three months, and I told myself that your actions spoke louder than words—that you’d open up to me when you were ready.
But now?” She shakes her head. “Your actions are making me question everything.” When I still don’t budge, my heart thrashing in my chest as I stare at her, she clears her throat. “Please move, Parker.”
“This can’t be over, Cashlynn.”
She takes her ring off of her finger and holds it out to me. “It was over the moment you betrayed my trust.”
I swear I can feel my heart crack as I stare down at the ring I knew belonged on her finger the moment I saw it.
When I don’t reach out to take it, she puts it in the pocket of my shirt and ducks under my outstretched arms, marching down the hall to grab her purse.
And I should go after her. I could try to plead my case some more. But maybe she just needs some space and time to see that my heart was in the right place. My mother warned me that this might be her reaction, but I just hate feeling like history is repeating itself.
When I hear the door shut, I heave out a sigh. “Fuck!”
Pulling my phone from my pocket, I dial my sister. Luckily, she answers on the first ring.
“Hello?”
“I think Cashlynn might be coming to you,” I say as I head back to the living room, trying to rewind the last twenty-four hours and decide if any decision I’ve made was the right one.
“And why would she be doing that?”
“I told her dad everything tonight.”
“Oh, Parker,” she sighs. “Why the hell would you do that?”
“I was trying to help, Hazel.” I plop down onto the couch and feel a sense of déjà vu come over me as I explain the day to my sister.
This isn’t the first time I’ve tried to help a woman I love. And last time it didn’t end well.
Let’s just hope this time is different. It has to be.