Chapter Five #2
For a moment, Nan stared at Mallory. Then, slowly, she seemed to relax. “Mallory. I’m so glad you’re here.”
Mallory’s heart lifted. Maybe Nan was feeling better today. “I’m glad I am too.” Mallory stepped closer, eager to give Nan a kiss on the temple.
“I’ve been waiting for an hour, at least,” Nan said, her tone turning grumpy. “I’m glad someone finally came to help me to the bathroom.”
Mallory’s steps slowed. Evidently, Nan thought she was one of the medical aides.
“Oh. Yes, I’m happy to help you.” Mallory took off her scarf and the bag she’d carried in, laying them in the chair beside Nan’s bed.
Then she helped Nan scoot to the edge of the bed and stand behind her walker.
Mallory kept a hand on Nan’s low back and guided her to the restroom inside the spacious room.
Once she had Nan standing with her back to the toilet, she helped Nan lower to a seated position and turned away.
Nan was a very private woman. She never wanted to “misplace” her dignity. That’s what Nan used to say. Once you misplace your dignity, that’s when you start leaving your house in your slippers and bathrobe.
Mallory could hear Nan’s voice in her head with its soft Southern lilt.
Nan said all kinds of unusual things that were strangely poetic.
None of them told Mallory much about her grandmother though.
It was hard to think that, even though Mallory had known Nan all her life, there were parts of Nan’s life Mallory knew nothing about.
“Is this the kind of job you always wanted?” Nan asked, the sound of her peeing echoing off the walls in the bathroom.
“What do you mean?” Mallory was anxious for Nan to finish so that she could show her the ornaments she’d brought. Maybe Nan would have another memory.
“Helping folks like me use the bathroom. It doesn’t sound thrilling if you ask me. Certainly not fulfilling.”
Mallory wasn’t the nursing aide here, but she was a nurse and she did help a lot of patients get to the bathroom at the hospital. “It’s not so bad. I enjoy helping others.”
“Mm. When I was younger, I wanted to be a star.” Nan finished peeing but continued to sit on the toilet.
“I just loved the spotlight. I loved to pull on a character like it was a piece of clothing and wear it. Then when my role was over, I’d slip it off before I laid my head on the pillow that night. ”
Mallory turned to face Nan. “You remember?”
“It’s all I ever wanted until I met him.” Nan reached for Mallory’s arm as Mallory helped her stand. Then Mallory helped her pull her pants back up around her waist. There was a clear look in Nan’s blue eyes as Mallory waited for more.
“Until you met who, Grandma? Who?”
Nan blinked. “What did you call me?”
Mallory shook her head. “Until you met who, Nan?” she pressed.
Nan’s brow line lowered, and the blue shade of her eyes darkened to a stormy gray. She started pushing her walker forward, nearly knocking Mallory over as she worked to get out of the small enclosed area.
Oh no. Mallory had seen this happen to Nan many times before. The smallest things agitated her.
“You were talking about wanting to be a movie star,” Mallory went on, trying to bring Nan back to the version of herself she’d been just moments before.
“Not a movie star!” Nan snapped. “You don’t know me. If you knew me, you’d know I didn’t want to be in the movies. I wanted to be onstage. On Broadway.” She lifted her walker and banged it on the floor as she turned and backed up to the edge of her bed. “I want you to leave,” she said quietly.
“Nan.” Mallory felt like the air had been knocked out of her. “Nan, I’d like to stay a while longer. I brought something to show you.” Mallory started to reach for the bag with the two Christmas ornaments inside.
“Leave!” Nan demanded with more force. “Leave! Leave! Leavvvvve!” she screamed angrily.
One of the nurses stepped inside Nan’s room and looked between Nan and Mallory. “Everything all right?”
“No!” Nan yelled. “I want this woman out of my room. Now!”
The nurse looked at Mallory apologetically. “I’m sorry but…”
Mallory stood and nodded, collecting her scarf and bag but leaving the bag of ornaments. “I understand. I’m going.” She looked at Nan, desperately wanting to bend and kiss her temple. But, in recent days, Nan had been known to swat a person who got in her space. “I’m going.”
Mallory held back her tears as she slipped out of Nan’s room, taking slow, deep breaths and reminding herself that Nan, her Nan, didn’t mean any of those things. Her Nan would never speak to her that way.
“Everything okay?” Francis asked as Mallory passed the front desk, her expression revealing that she already knew the answer.
Mallory nodded quietly, fearing that allowing herself to speak would open the floodgates of her tears.
“We can wait for the tree trimming until tomorrow,” Francis reassured her.
“Okay.” Mallory turned and headed out of the building. Once she was standing on the pavement, she sucked in the air around her as if it were life. Part of her wanted to continue past her car and go for a nice, long walk to clear her thoughts. She had things to do though. Rehearsals started tonight.
As if on cue with that thought, her cell phone pinged with an incoming text. Mallory welcomed the distraction until she opened the messages and read.
It was from Adam Barclay, the long-running actor who played Santa for the community theater’s production.
Adam: Sorry, Mal. I really am. But I can’t play Santa this year.
Mallory’s already aching heart felt like an earthquake had hit, cracking it right down the middle. She clutched the phone, hand shaking.
Adam: Times are tough and I need a second job that pays. I know Nan would understand. I hope you do as well.
Mallory’s first instinct was to say, “No, she didn’t understand.” Here she was, working her full-time job and extra shifts but still planning to direct this entire production. That was because Nan was her family though. Adam did not owe Nan anything—not the way Mallory did.
On a sigh, she tapped out a text as tears welled and blurred her vision.
Mallory: Of course, I understand, Adam. Let me know if there’s anything I can do to help.
Nan was ever understanding. The play rehearsals began tonight though. Santa was the most important character, and the understudy for the role had moved in the past year. “What on earth am I going to do?” Mallory said out loud, standing in the middle of the parking lot.
“About what?”
Mallory whirled at the sound of Hollis’s voice as he exited his truck with the little tree tied to the back. Judging by his expression, she guessed she looked as bad as she felt. “I can’t do this.”
He walked in her direction until he was only a couple of feet away. “Can’t do what?”
“Any of it. All of it.” She gestured to the tree in his cab. “What’s the point of celebrating the season when you don’t have anyone to celebrate with?”
Hollis lifted a brow. “You still have Nan. You have Maddie. Savannah.” He held her gaze. “And me, although I admit I’m no consolation prize.”
Mallory shook her head. “Can I just skip Christmas this year? Forget the tree, the presents, the play. Forget it all… Nan isn’t in the mood for the tree today.
I guess I’m not either now. It’s just disappointing, you know.
” She pulled in a steadying breath. “I caught the slightest glimpse of holiday excitement when we were on the farm earlier. The smell of pine brought me back to this place in my heart where Christmas was still magical. Then Nan threw me out of her room, and to top it off, Adam just quit the leading role of the play. There’s no play without Santa. ”
Hollis nodded as he seemed to process her long list of complaints. “Santas are a dime a dozen. We’ll find one. And you’ll catch that Christmas spirit again.”
“How?”
“When you join me at the dance Friday night. You’re not backing out on me, are you?”
“Did I ever really agree to go in the first place?” She tilted her head to one side, feeling unfamiliarly playful and… flirty?
Hollis stroked his fingers along his beard. She didn’t even like guys with beards. Except right now, she kind of did. “Do you promise going to this dance will help me find my holiday spirit?”
He looked at her for a long moment before exhaling softly and lowering his hand. “No. No, I don’t make promises I can’t keep. Not these days, at least. But”—he held up a finger—“I do promise that you’ll be like Stella.”
“Stella?” Mallory shook her head. She didn’t know any Stellas.
Hollis did a slow-motion dip and shake of his hips. Then he bit his lower lip. “Stella got her groove back.”
Mallory burst into laughter. Once she caught her breath, she said, “You’re going to help me get my groove back? That assumes I ever had a groove to begin with.”
“You did.” He gave her a knowing look. “You might not have known it, but I did. We are going to rock that dance floor on Friday night. That’s a promise I can make.”
Releasing a sigh, Mallory wondered if she was about to make a big mistake. Her plate was already full. More than full. “Okay, okay. I’ll go to the dance with you.”
He lifted his brows.
Her heart tumbled. Maybe she’d assumed he’d been asking her to go with him. Was he just asking her to go, but not with him? Why did he look surprised? “I mean I’ll see you there,” she corrected. “I’m going for Nan.”
“But you’re saving a dance for me,” Hollis said with a slow-growing grin.
Then he rubbed his hands together. “Mallory got her groove back. And her Christmas spirit.” He offered that wink she knew he gave everyone.
Somehow this one felt different though. Somehow everything between them shifted and felt… different. In a good way.
The Wildflower Ornament
Look inside the box and pick up the envelope with a number 2 written on the front.
Inside you’ll find a small square of pressed wildflowers with a hole punched at the top and a violet-colored ribbon looped through it.
Hang this keepsake on the first branch down from the top where the Santa Hat sits.
Here’s the story behind the Wildflower Ornament.
Our little high school play ran for five shows that year with Ralph playing Santa for all of them. Each kiss onstage was hotter than the last. Wow, that man could kiss.
After the last night of the show, he came up to me with a bouquet of wildflowers, saying something about tradition.
No one else brought me flowers. Just him.
He didn’t ask me out though. Mickey, however, the original Santa, did, and I said yes.
Part of me agreed just to get back at Ralph for waiting too long.
Maybe I read the signs incorrectly. Maybe Ralph wasn’t interested in me and it was all just acting.
On the night of my date with Mickey, I put on my best dress and curled my hair.
Mickey drove me to the nicest restaurant in Bloom.
I think he wanted to impress me and flaunt his family’s money.
I admit, I was impressed. As we sat down, I admired the establishment and guess who walked in?
This wasn’t the kind of place Ralph could afford, yet he strolled through the double doors wearing his Sunday best and that darn Santa hat.
He didn’t look my way. Instead, he simply took his seat a few tables in front of mine and ate his meal alone.
It was impossible to focus on my date with him there! I wanted to get up and go tell Ralph to leave. But I also wanted to sit down with him instead.
“If you were jealous, that’s your own fault,” I halfway yelled at him the next Monday, making quite the scene. “You had your chance to ask me out, Ralph. You had your chance to—”
“Go out with me,” he interrupted, his voice so gentle. Then he shook his head, as if he’d messed up. “That’s not the way I wanted to do it. I wanted to do it the right way…” He took a breath. “Nan, I was at that restaurant because I didn’t want you to be the girl—”
“Woman,” I corrected stubbornly.
“Woman,” he repeated. “Nan, I just wanted to make sure Mickey was a gentleman. If he were to hurt you, in any way, it’d be my fault because I was too much of a coward to ask you out.”
I stared at him, weighing whether I was supposed to be angry or appreciative.
“You’re lucky I didn’t have a good time on my date with Mickey anyway.
” I looked at Ralph stubbornly, folding my arms over my chest. “Probably because you were there, and I would have rather been eating with you than listening to Mickey drone on about how wonderful he and his family are.”
“Is that a yes?” Ralph asked, a subtle lilt to his tone of voice.
The hope in Ralph’s eyes was adorable. I remember looking at him and thinking, I’m in trouble. I’m halfway to falling for this guy and we haven’t even gone on a real date yet. I also felt this thread of fear zip from my head to my toes. Falling for Ralph could ruin my Broadway dreams.
It might sound foolish, but I felt like my future hinged on my answer to Ralph’s question. Isn’t that how life is? One moment, one decision, can change the course of everything.
“One condition.” I pointed my finger at him. “We’re just having fun. Nothing more.”
“Just having fun.” He nodded.
“You have to promise, Ralph.”
I knew he was a man of his word. “I promise to be a stand-up guy who will treat you the way you deserve. And I’ll never force you to feel any way about me that you’re not comfortable with. And… I’ll keep the way I feel about you to myself.”
It wasn’t the promise I was looking for, but it was enough for me. “Okay, then. Yes, I’ll go out with you.”