Chapter 20
20
‘So nice to see you again, Jo. Hope you’ve not been working too hard today.’
Emma swept into the house that afternoon leaving a cloud of expensive perfume behind her.
‘Just trying to create some space and find the right homes for things. Nothing too strenuous. Tea? Coffee? Come through.’ I invited her to follow me and flicked the kettle on. As I got two china mugs down from the cupboard above, she walked over to the huge French doors and let out a sigh.
‘I do love that view.’
I smiled.
‘Lush, isn’t it? I pinch myself every day.’
‘I bet you do. This is a bit of a surprise, isn’t it?’ She stood back and looked around the room.
‘What, the cottage?’
‘Yeah, it looks like a normal size from outside, but it’s like a Tardis. It’s huge. And gorgeous!’
‘Well, hopefully it will be again at some point. I’ll take you on a guided tour later. Come and have a look from the decking. You could be anywhere in the world.’
‘Oh my God, Jo, you have really hit the jackpot here.’ She looked upwards. ‘Don’t tell me all the rooms have a view of some kind. I will be so jealous.’
I chewed the inside of my mouth and slowly nodded my response.
‘You jammy cow!’ We both laughed.
‘Do you live far from here?’
‘Not really but my house is up for sale.’
‘On the move, are you?’
‘Sadly, yes.’ She took a deep breath. ‘I still find it really hard to accept. And to say. My husband died last year and I just can’t bring myself to live in the house any more.’
‘I’m so sorry to hear that. That must have been really hard. And you’re so young too.’
I blew out air. What did you say to someone under circumstances like this? There was nothing you could say to make anything better.
‘Yeah, so was he. Just had his fiftieth birthday. Heart attack, totally out of the blue. Lucky for him he wouldn’t have known a thing. But hard for the rest of us that we never got time to say goodbye.’
‘God, Emma.’
This called for something stronger than a cuppa in my opinion.
‘Don’t suppose you fancy a gin instead?’ I offered.
Emma glanced at her watch and I noticed that it was very similar to the Cartier one I used to have. She obviously had excellent taste. She was one of those people who exuded elegance. Her clothes were classy, her hair perfectly cut into a short, blunt, burgundy bob and make-up perfectly done.
She seemed to dither a little in making a decision.
‘Oh, bugger it. I’m on call for the shop but there’s nothing I’d love more than a G&T right now. I’ve had a doozy of a day. And I’ve literally got nothing to go home for.’
‘Well, in that case, why don’t you have a seat out here and get yourself comfy, I’ll go and pour us a drink.’
* * *
The ice and lime segments in the tall tumblers clinked against the side of the glass, making a musical tinkling sound. Emma had her eyes shut and her head facing the late-afternoon sun. I thought she might have fallen asleep, so placed the glasses down quietly on the low table.
‘This… is… bliss.’ She sighed. ‘I also think it’s the first time in just over a year that someone has made me a drink at the end of the working day.’
I was struggling to know what to say to her and hesitated.
‘Please just treat me normally, Jo. I’m so tired of that look in everyone’s eyes. That pitying look when people don’t know what to say. Some are scared to ask me how I am. Others are scared to come anywhere near me and cross the road and wave or they walk up another aisle of the supermarket rather than stop to chat. I mean no one really knows what to say to the woman who has a dead husband, do they?’
I felt myself pull a face and then immediately apologised, knowing I was doing exactly what she detested.
‘So what do you say to the woman with a dead husband? What would help?’
‘Buggered if I know!’ she laughed. ‘I never said I had the answers, now, did I? Sometimes you just want to hear that someone doesn’t know what to say. That’s all you need, rather than them not mention it.’
‘What was he like?’ I whispered. ‘Would you like to talk about him?’
‘Now that’s a lovely thing to say. It’s very rare that anyone asks me that. Most people, even my family, act like he was never in my life in the first place. It’s bizarre. And I love talking about him. It keeps the memories alive. I’m not sure if they think it’ll remind me that he’s died and that’s the issue. I mean it’s not like I’m ever likely to forget, is it?’
She promptly went on to tell me all about Ben and before we knew it we were at the bottom of our glasses and I asked her if she’d like a top-up, to which she agreed, deciding that she’d leave her car here and get a taxi home. I was feeling a bit squiffy myself so put some crisps in a dish to soak up the alcohol and took them out on a tray.
‘Jo, I haven’t felt this relaxed for months. This house seems to have magical properties. And the fact that you can walk down a path at the bottom of your garden and be on the beach is just so amazing.’
‘That’s how I felt when I first came here, you know.’ I relayed the story of when I first came to visit and how I’d ended up living in Sandpiper Shore.
‘It suits you. You seem right at home here, as if you’ve been here forever.’
‘It feels like that too. It’s like I’ve found my soul home, if that doesn’t sound like I’m a complete headcase.’
‘Don’t mind me. I talk to my dead husband all the time. I love a lunatic.’ We laughed. I felt so comfortable in her company and between us, we didn’t stop talking.
‘Do you eat pizza, Emma? I’ll have to eat something soon and it’s just about all I’ve got in the freezer at the mo.’
She smiled at me.
‘You are a godsend, Jo. Did someone send you deliberately to help me?’
A tear slid down her cheek but to ask her if she was OK seemed such a stupid question.
‘You’re so kind. This is the first time that someone has done something nice for me since Ben died.’ She squeezed my hand. ‘Thank you.’
Ridiculously, as this was only the third time I’d met her, I felt like I’d known her all my life. She was so easy to chat with and between us, we put the world to rights. From menopause to brain fog, and from family woes to financial worries, I couldn’t remember the last time I’d let go like this and I certainly hadn’t drunk this much for a good few years. When we had the third drink, I fired up the patio heater as, despite it being the nicest day of the year so far, it had started to get a little nippy. When we had the fourth glass, I brought out throws after Emma had refused to come indoors, saying that the calming sounds of the sea were therapeutic and made her feel better than she’d felt for months. I suggested that might be the gin.
Emma suddenly shot up and gasped.
‘How awful am I? I haven’t even looked at any of the furniture or belongings that I came here for. You haven’t given me the guided tour you promised either.’
‘Well, you can say no if you like and it may just be coincidence but I made up the spare room recently. It’s not been decorated for years, and is a bit old-fashioned, but it does have a gorgeous view and French doors and if you’re awake in time you might even get to see the sun come up.’
‘That’s one of the loveliest suggestions I think anyone has ever made. I think you are my new favourite person in the whole wide world. OK, let’s do it. And then in the morning, I can take a look at everything. As long as you don’t think I’m going to burgle you in the middle of the night or anything.’
We both laughed.
‘I think I’m more likely to steal that watch than you burgle anything of mine. You’ve already had most of my worldly possessions. Also, I’m too tired these days to be bothered about much so if someone wanted to burgle me, I’d just let them go ahead without putting up too much of a fight.’
‘In that case, and as long as it’s not too much trouble, I’d love to stay. Thank you. You’re very kind.’
‘It’s nice to have the company.’
As I sank down onto my pillows that night, I realised that once again, I’d spent a lot of the evening laughing with a new acquaintance and also that I was starting to feel less alone. Like I was making friends and that maybe I was finally belonging somewhere.