Chapter 29
29
‘I love it, Jo. What a lovely thing to do.’ I was delighted that Emma liked my idea. I looked over at Michelle, who had a great big grin spread across her face.
‘It’s genius. It’s like a dating service for friends.’
I breathed a sigh of relief that they didn’t both think that I was completely bonkers.
‘There must be loads of people like us. Good people that want to still have a life, but don’t have anyone to do it with. I’m going to do some research and work out how to start everything off. Maybe I just do a Facebook page or a membership group or something like that. We could even set up a few organised events, maybe some meals out to start with and promote them locally.’
‘So when you say we, I presume that we’re being dragged into this too then?’ Emma grinned and grabbed my hand. ‘I am in, by the way. I think you’ve really hit on something here. And I think we need to aim big too. Other events that people are missing out on. Dancing, theatre trips, days out; the world is our oyster. We just need to think about all the things that are hard to do on your own. Are we just limiting it to women, or including anyone?’
Michelle was nodding so hard I thought she’d make her neck ache. ‘Yeah, I’m in too. However I can be involved, count me in. It took me so long to admit that I was lonely to myself, let alone to others. I know there are tons of people who must feel the same. I watched something on TV recently and there was a huge amount of people who admitted to feeling lonely at times in their life. It really surprised me. And women are more likely to be lonely than men, but I reckon that’s only because women would admit it more. There were some incredible statistics that have really stuck with me since I saw the programme.’
‘I think you’re right about women and men. Women are just better at talking about it rather than men. Men definitely need to open up more. There are more programmes about men’s mental health than ever on the TV. There was something on the other night that said males are three times more likely than women to take their own lives. I definitely think we should be totally open to everyone of any age too. I think there are as many young people now who are lonely, especially in this digital age that we live in. And probably those who are older too.’ Once again, Dame Tessa entered my head. ‘Those who have lost friends and partners. Just imagine if what we did could make a difference to just one person’s life.’ I felt a sense of pride in what we were about to do. ‘It would be so worthwhile.’
We all fell silent, alone in our thoughts. I felt a little fire in my belly. My feeling of purpose and also excitement was growing bigger and bigger the more we talked about it. I knew in my heart that we could change some people’s worlds.
‘I think calling it The Lonely Hearts Club sums it all up. We might need a strapline, though, to go with it.’
‘What do you mean Michelle?’ I’d heard the expression strapline many times but never really knew what it meant.
‘Something to sound positive to go alongside it. “Helping friendships flourish”, “finding friends” or “fabulous friendship group”. Something like that so people know what to expect from the group. Otherwise it might just sound like a dating site, which is not what it is.’ Michelle was clearly very good at her job. I knew she worked in marketing but didn’t realise just how integral to this project she could be.
‘It absolutely isn’t, but wouldn’t it also be wonderful to know that we’d enabled two people to meet and develop more than just friendship?’ Emma clutched her hands to her heart and laughed. ‘God, I’m such an old romantic.’
Michelle, clearly enthused, was speaking so fast she could hardly get her words out. ‘Honestly, the more I think about this, the more I know it’s the right thing to do. Why hasn’t anyone else really thought of this? There are loads of dating sites and apps out in the world, mostly full of pervy men who just want to send pictures of their anatomy to poor unsuspecting females. But maybe that’s just my experience.’
We all laughed at her. The thought of going through some of the things I heard about horrified me. I’d never find love again if apps were the only way forward.
‘They could just be really simple things,’ I was becoming quite excited by this idea, ‘like a group walk, keep fit classes, group swimming, some meals and evenings out to start with, and maybe in time we could even do holidays. There must be hundreds, even thousands of people who miss out on holidays because they don’t have anyone to go with. I haven’t had a holiday since Michael and I split up. I’d feel ridiculous sat in a hotel on my own. I’d feel as if everyone was staring at me even though they probably wouldn’t be.’
I thought back to the wonderful family holidays we’d had over the years until the girls became too old to want to come with us. And then Michael had been working so hard that he didn’t feel he could take time off. Although now I knew that he wasn’t actually working that hard but spending that time with Claudia.
Much as I would have loved to lie around a pool in the sunshine, I’d not plucked up the courage in the last couple of years to go it alone, despite feeling like I really needed it.
‘So come on then. Jo, go and get some paper and pens. Emma, go and grab us another bottle of Prosecco out of the fridge. We have lists to make and jobs to allocate. We need to think of things that cost money and some things that don’t. Not everyone can afford to go out eating all the time or paying lots to go to things so we definitely need to think of some no-cost and low-cost things to do. However, I think we should start with a launch party. I’m going to share the arse off this on my social media profiles.’ Michelle clapped her hands at Emma and me. ‘Come on, girls. Get to it.’
‘God, I love how bossy you are, Michelle.’ Emma laughed as she went off to the outside wine cooler and grabbed us another bottle. It made me smile to think about how easily the three of us had fitted into each other’s lives without being too intrusive.
‘You say bossy. I say assertive. At least we’ll get things done if I’m project managing.’
We clinked glasses and toasted. ‘The Lonely Hearts Club.’
These women had literally changed my life and at that very moment I could honestly say that for the first time in a while, I hadn’t felt lonely or alone. If we could do this for others too, it would be truly remarkable.