Chapter 46
46
The Surf Shack, St Aidan
Dancers with bruised knees
Saturday
‘D o Saturday nights in summer come any better?’
You guessed it. We’re at the Surf Shack, Miles is bigging up the evening he pushed me into, but to be fair I couldn’t have asked for a better companion. He’s danced without a thought every time I’ve asked, he’s just fought his way to the bar with me for the fourth time and now he’s lounging on the sand under the light strands that are swinging above us on the edge of the Surf Shack deck, drinking craft bitter from the bottle and getting more snoggable with every wave that comes up the beach.
As I watch the wind tangling his hair and the crowds of lively revellers melt out of focus in the half-light beyond him it’s almost as if we were the only people here. ‘A Sea Breeze cocktail in one hand, a Beachcomber in the other, “Flowers in the Rain” belting out across the sand dunes, the whole beach erupting every time Abba sing “Waterloo”.’ I take a sip through my straw. ‘What’s not to like?
‘You know the only downside?’ I don’t think I’m slurring, but I’ve lost count of how many Strawberry Daiquiris I’ve had from Zach. He refuses to take no for an answer, and drops them into my hand in return for the briefest word in my ear before he disappears into the crowd again. Me being about to tell Miles about tonight’s wardrobe disaster is a definite sign they’re going to my head. ‘I was in such a rush, I came out in two dresses rather than four, so I’m only half dressed.’
Miles’s eyes narrow as he holds my gaze. ‘Am I allowed to say you look great in your underwear?’
Questions like that are why I should never have started this. ‘Two months ago you wouldn’t have been. This once, I’ll let it go.’ I’d usually be appalled by the electric tingles that are zinging up and down my spine, but the sea and the tiredness from a full-on week mean for once I give in and enjoy the shivers.
Miles gives me that look where he seems to be peering right inside my head. ‘You know that Zach’s going to ask you to go home with him?’
I bite my lip and consider. ‘If you’re talking about the drinks he’s been bringing over, I tried to refuse them, but the price he charges for those bales, Scarlett’s paid for them three times over.’ I’m being true to myself here. ‘I might have been tempted once, but I’m not going to go now. Shall we dance again?’
Spot the deliberate mistake. As Miles stands up I’m still holding two full glasses, but I’m happy to say I’ve not lost my ability to down drinks. A few moments later I’ve pushed my empty glasses onto the Surf Shack deck and he’s reaching out to pull me to my feet.
I smile up at him as he tugs on my hand. ‘That’s another thing I’ve learned in St Aidan. It’s okay to say “no”. And careful selection isn’t necessarily a bad thing. I might even have discovered why I always ended up with the wrong people.’
As I join him jumping around to the music I’m shouting at him. ‘For someone so up themselves you’re surprisingly willing to dance.’
He bends and yells back into my ear. ‘I can’t be that aloof and distant, Bets. I’m pogo-ing to Plastique Bertrand here.’
It’s not a great time to start an interrogation, but in the dusk, on the beach, with the wind whipping away the answers it’s somehow easier to ask. ‘All those hoops a woman has to jump through to get a date with you. What’s that about?’
He calls back. ‘Every requirement is a no-brainer. Do they support themselves? Do they know their own mind? Can they create a spreadsheet, host a party, make a playlist, drive a car…’
I cup my hand around his ear. ‘You’re effing unbelievable, Milo.’
He’s still bouncing on the spot. ‘It was my mum’s contribution that held me back. Must be able to sing along to Abba . If only I’d come to a St Aidan disco earlier, I’d have known the whole town would qualify for that.’
‘The sheer arrogance…’
He actually sounds pleased with himself. ‘It’s a comprehensive list. It certainly saved me a lot of wasted time.’
‘Me showing an interest doesn’t mean I condone it.’ I’m shaking my head. ‘What happens once some poor woman satisfies all your ridiculous conditions?’ Enquiring for a friend here, obviously not for myself.
‘If you’re wondering how you’re doing, you’d ticked every box but one, and you’ve nailed the final one this evening.’ He shrugs. ‘Anyone else, I’d go ahead and ask them out. But you’re a special case, so you’ve got to ask me.’
I’m not even trying to hide my incredulity. ‘That’s it?’
His voice is very low. ‘Try me and see?’
I’m right back at him. ‘You don’t mean that. If we’re in another one of those head-to-head situations, you know better than to challenge me. I’m very stubborn. I won’t rise.’
As ever, it’s three steps forwards two steps back with Milo-pie. Just when I think I’m uncovering his warmer, softer, approachable side, he comes out with this!
I’m reeling at the audacity. The assumptions. The whole overblown confidence that I’ll fall at his feet. The more infuriating he is, the more I want to grind my body against his. At the same time, it’s comforting to think it’s only this extreme because I’m on my seventh drink.
As Zofia comes into view her arm linked through Zach’s, we ease off on the dancing and suspend the argument.
‘Excuse us interrupting, but can you clear something up for lovely Zach here please.’
As Zach steps forward his eyes are less intensely blue than they were last week. ‘Are you two an item? Zofia’s insisting you are, but I’d heard you weren’t.’
I’m quick to confirm. ‘We’re definitely just housemates.’
Miles holds up a finger. ‘Let’s quantify that. We’re the kind of housemates who opted to stay together when we could have moved on. Who got on so well we became business partners and who are now working with a multi-outlet operation.’
Zofia jumps in. ‘If they were one of those surveys where they tell you your progress, they would be ninety-five percent through to becoming a couple.’
It’s not lost on me. There’s this eager, hunky, Greek god of a guy who I’d once have gone for like a shot, but now he leaves me cold. Then right next to him there’s the one-time awful, arrogant, arseholey Miles, and he’s the one I’m struggling to keep my hands off. Worse still, since he’s become all caring and kind and considerate, he’s ten times more irresistible. All I can say is, with this much confusion it’s a damn good thing I gave up on men for good.
When I smile at Zach, it’s genuine. ‘It’s a shame we didn’t meet in the days when I had a different bad boy every night, Zach. We’d have had a lot of fun.’
Zach holds up another glass full to the brim of red liquid. ‘I was going to give you this and offer to drive you home, Betty, but it looks like it’s just the drink after all.’
I shake my head at the glass. ‘Thanks for the drinks, but give that one to someone more deserving.’
Zofia turns back to Miles and me. ‘Well, now we’ve settled that so successfully, we’ll head off and leave you two to the rest of your evening.’
As we watch them walk away across the soft sand, I blow out my cheeks and turn to Miles. ‘I’m sorry if that ruined the mood.’
Miles gives a shrug. ‘Not at all. Well done for putting that one to bed without ending up in it.’
Now that I’m standing still rather than dancing, the wind is slicing through the fabric of my dresses, and I hug my chest. ‘Have you danced enough? Are we done here?’
Miles nods. ‘I’m good to go if you are.’ His voice is full of concern. ‘You’re cold. Here, take my jacket.’
I’m actually freezing, but with my head as it is, if I engulf myself in Miles’s scent, I may just explode. ‘It’s no distance to the cottage, you stay cosy.’
It shows you how much notice he takes of me. A moment later he strips off his jacket. Another second and he’s sliding it across my shoulders and with the soft denim wrapped around me a delicious scent fills my nose and his heat permeates through to my bones. For the first time all evening I’m truly warm. I’m not sure what happens next, but as my muscles relax, I must drop my guard because one moment we’re side by side, and the next he’s turned to face me and he’s looking down at me.
I’m staring up at the shadows of his cheekbones, his ruffled curls silhouetted against the night clouds and the stars between them.
As he pulls the jacket close around me I step forward, press my body against the planes of his chest, slide my hand upwards over the curve of his biceps and up to his face. I feel the prickle of stubble on my palm, spread my fingers across his cheek, listen to the thud of my heart as it bangs hard enough to leap out of my chest. Then, I stop and tug my own long, floaty scarf until it’s free. When I reach up and wrap it around his neck it feels strangely as if I’m marking him as mine.
‘There you go, now you look like Harry Styles.’
His laugh is a low rumble. ‘I can live with that.’
Then I grab both ends of the scarf and pull him towards me, push my hip hard against his, move my right hand to bury my fingers in his hair, clear my throat, and whisper, ‘Okay. You win. I’m asking. Dates, drinks, nights in your bed, days in your bed, business opportunities, roller coasters, pony rides, picnics, takeaway pizzas. I’ll do any or all of it, so long as you kiss me now…’
I watch the hollow at the base of his neck, his Adam’s apple moving as he swallows.
I pull back an inch. ‘It’s got to be now, Miles. If you mess about, it’s not going to work.’
He pushes my hair out of my eyes, untangles his fingers and stares down into my face.
‘There’s nothing I’d like more in the world, Betsy B. But I can’t do it now, not when you’re like this.’
I let out a shout. ‘WHEN I’M LIKE WHAT?’ I stagger backwards, he catches my arm and it hits me. ‘You’re refusing to kiss me because I’m off my face! That’s it, isn’t it?’
He winces. ‘You’ve had a lot more drinks than me. We wouldn’t be equal.’
My voice rises. ‘You’re so bloody chivalrous! What about what I want?’
His voice is level as he pulls me to him. ‘I want to kiss you all the time, I’ve always wanted to kiss you. You only want to kiss me when you’ve had a bottle of fizz. If you need ten cocktails before it feels right, that’s never going to work.’
My chest is so full of anger I feel like I might burst.
I push him away hard. ‘Jeez, Miles, how uptight can you get? If that’s your attitude I won’t be asking at all. Thank goodness I dodged that bullet.’ I take another step back. ‘I don’t know about you, but I’m going home now.’
I turn and run across the sand and in through Pumpkin’s field. I get as far as the sofa before I realise, I’m still wearing his jacket. But by that time, I’m too far gone to take it off.