Dubrovnik
Natali shuffled uncomfortably on the plastic hospital chair and set her book on her lap.
It was a great story about a young girl set at some time in the future who had to decide whether to risk death or take a drug that would ruin her life, but right at this moment she wasn’t doing it justice.
She glanced at Baka, who was still asleep – had been asleep since Natali arrived.
She looked so peaceful that Natali didn’t want to wake her, even though the nurse had said it was OK.
Now it was August, the problem of what would happen in September was looming large in Natali’s mind.
She and Obi had had a brief stay of execution, because in the fortnight after the library project finished Ana had taken on a private charter for two Danish couples who were relatives of a local olive grower, and she’d asked if Natali would stay on to crew for her.
But after that? Natali just had to hope that another charter would come up.
But it would only be for a few more weeks at best, because Ana had told her she liked to get Dida Krila tucked safely into her permanent berth in Ston by mid-October, before the weather became unreliable.
She had wondered about asking Ana if she could live on the catamaran in return for doing the winter maintenance, but it didn’t feel right.
She knew how much Ana valued the freedom the boat gave her, so what if there were some bright, calm days when she wanted to take her out?
If Natali and Obi were actually living on Dida Krila, they’d be bound to compromise that, and she’d hate anything to sour their friendship.
One thing was certain: Natali needed some sort of plan.
It wasn’t fair on Obi to spend her life hoping and praying that suitable work might just turn up.
Actually, it wasn’t fair on her either. She was beginning to understand that she might be worth better.
That she had skills. Skills that were transferable into year-round work, like Krasna.
But no actual qualifications. Was she clever enough to at least try the adult education programme Lloyd had told her about?
There was bound to be reading and writing involved, which kind of scared her, but the way she was devouring whole books…
And Lloyd had told her in no uncertain terms that reading would improve her writing too.
“Natali … should have … woken me.” Baka’s voice sounded stronger than it had on Wednesday, and Natali smiled.
“You need to rest. And I have all afternoon.”
“Not working?”
“It’s Sunday. I’ll get the six-fifteen ferry to meet the others.”
“You’ll look for Valentin?” The long fingers of Baka’s good hand smoothed the sheet under them.
“Of course I will. If I see him at Gru? before we board I’ll send him straight here.” Oh, it felt terrible lying like this, but if it saved Baka the grief of knowing…
“You should marry him, you know.”
“Marry who?”
“Valentin, of course. Good man … will make you laugh … always laughing…”
“But he doesn’t know me, Baka. He might not like me.”
“He does. Always did. He told me.”
Who on earth did Baka think she was? And yet only minutes ago Baka had known her name. This felt like a whole new level of confusion, sending Natali’s brain into free fall. She needed to pull herself together. Fast.
“But does he like dogs, Baka?”
“Dear little Obi.”
So that was all right. Baka did know who she was, and she felt weak with relief. Not for herself so much, but for Baka’s state of mind. Maybe it was just an extension of what had apparently been happening for years, this fantasy world where Valentin was still alive.
“When he comes … someone must cook for him.” Baka murmured.
“Only until you’re better, Baka. No one cooks like you.”
“I do?”
Oh god. Had Mateo been right after all and his mother’s mind was badly affected by the stroke?
And if she couldn’t cook, which was so deeply ingrained into her very being, what else had she forgotten how to do?
How on earth would she be able to look after herself?
Please, please, let it be because Baka was still a little sleepy, she thought.
Before she told anyone about this development, Natali decided to see if she could tease any kitchen memories from her. She had to be certain of what she was saying, because it could affect both Baka’s rehab and her future.
“We went to a party last night,” she said slowly.
Baka nodded eagerly. “Tell me.”
“It was for Victory Day. There was dancing and everything, and Obi ate far too many scraps, but Lloyd promised to take her for a long walk this morning. The food was wonderful though. The sir i vrnhje dip especially, so I asked the hostess for her recipe, and she said she put a little tarragon into it. From her garden. Do you grow tarragon, Baka?”
Baka frowned. “Aubergines … tomatoes…” She gripped Natali’s hand. “Natali, they need water. Will you do it?”
Relief surged through Natali. At least Baka remembered her garden. “Of course, but I expect your neighbours are looking after things.” She paused. “What do you put in your sir i vrnhje?”
Baka shook her head. “I … I don’t know.” A deep sadness was etched into the old woman’s face. Did she sense that something important was lost? Did she know there were things she couldn’t remember?
Footsteps tapped across the linoleum floor, and the curtain rings rattled as a tall woman of about Ana’s age wearing a white coat appeared.
“Ah, good,” she said. “Are you family? We’re moving Mrs Valenti? to our rehab unit tomorrow, but there are things she needs. Clothes and the like.”
“Natali … my son’s fiancée.”
Natali wanted the chair to swallow her up. She had to put this right, but how could she in front of Baka? She looked pleadingly at the medic.
“Fiancée? But your daughter-in-law came on Thursday.”
“My other son. Valentin.”
“Oh, I see.” She raised her eyebrows in Natali’s direction, who gave the tiniest of shrugs in return. Thank goodness the woman knew enough about Baka to understand. Mateo must have told her.
“I am going to the h-house,” Natali said, “to water the plants. Perhaps I could…?”
“Perfect. Come with me to the desk and I’ll give you a list.”
Natali touched Baka’s hand. “I won’t be long.”
She followed the woman to the nurses’ station in the corridor outside. “So who exactly are you?” she asked.
“Just a f-friend. But I’m fond of her and I want to help, although I’m sure her neighbours have everything in hand. It’s a wonderful c-community.”
The woman smiled. “I’m sure it is.”
“She’ll miss it if Mateo makes her move to Split. Will the rehab help her to remember how to do things?”
“That I can’t tell you, because we don’t really know how bad her memory was before the stroke.”
“It was fine,” said Natali firmly. “Apart from Valentin, that is. Only a couple of weeks ago she was teaching me how to cook…” Tears flooded her eyes and she rubbed at them furiously with the back of her hand.
“Now come on, none of that,” said the medic kindly. “You’re here to cheer Mrs Valenti? up. Now go through this list with her and see if she can tell you where to find everything in her house. It will be a good test.”
* * *
When Baka fell asleep for the third time, Natali crept from the hospital ward.
It was a shame there wasn’t an earlier ferry; if she could get to Kolo?ep sooner she could pack Baka’s bag this evening, rather than take too long out of the working day tomorrow.
She already felt guilty about needing more time off, in part because she knew Ana wouldn’t say no and it felt like taking advantage, which was the very last thing she wanted to do.
To Natali’s relief, Baka had done quite well with the list, remembering where most things were.
She’d also told her that the woman next door had a key to the house, so perhaps she would help her to find everything else.
There were so many things Baka still remembered perfectly.
Was that cause for hope she might be able to go home after all?
Natali walked slowly down the hill through Lapad, past houses which were almost all holiday lets or small hotels.
In the gaps between the buildings, she could see the silvery expanse of Gru? harbour ahead, the small boats owned by locals crammed into its blunt end, bordering the narrow park that edged the promenade.
She could grab a bottle of cola and some chocolate then sit there with her book, or she could really spoil herself and splash out on coffee and cake at Rhea Silvia.
It would be cool and shaded under its awning and she was sure she could make it last the hour or so she’d have to wait.
Plus it was quite a smart place so she was unlikely to bump into anyone she knew – anyone who might tell her mother she’d come to Dubrovnik without visiting her.
She felt guilty about that, but it couldn’t be helped.
Her mother might even be working, because Auntie Stela had taken her to the hairdresser to cheer her up, then practically dragged her back to the restaurant to restart her shifts.
Natali could never have done that, because her mama simply wouldn’t have gone.
It was better for both of them that Natali had stayed out of the way.
Good old Auntie Stela and her mantra of positivity.
It had helped make the toughest times of her life bearable, but now there was the smallest of voices inside her questioning whether positivity alone was enough.
When Lloyd had told her about the adult education course, he’d said it was a great way to start taking her future into her own hands, which was exciting.
But also properly scary, given how rubbish she’d been at school.
She knew from the books she was reading that change only came in the characters’ lives when they made it happen themselves.
Could she do the same? A steady, year-round job would make all the difference, but it kept coming back to the same thing: better qualifications.
Even if she was capable of studying, she’d need money to pay for the course and somewhere to live so she could do it.
But in that case, she’d be working all hours to pay the rent, so how would she find the time?
However much the idea appealed, the practicalities were stacked against her.
Sod it. She’d treat herself to an iced coffee and a slice of Rhea Silvia’s delicious chocolate cake.
At this hour on a Sunday afternoon, most of the tables stood empty under the café’s generous awning.
It was a peaceful time between lunch and the cocktails the place was famous for.
Natali sank into a low, cushioned chair next to a potted palm and studied the menu.
It wasn’t cheap, but she was here now. Her stomach had been telling her for some time that it needed sustenance, but first she’d better let Ana know what she’d committed to with Baka.
When Natali pulled out her phone she found a message from Krasna.
A strange one. Could she ask Lloyd which ferry he’d taken when he’d left Kor?ula?
Ferry? Then Natali realised. She meant all those years ago, before the war.
How on earth was he going to remember that?
And why was it important? But from what she’d seen of Krasna so far, it would be.
She typed a quick reply, saying she was in Dubrovnik and would ask him later, then realised a waitress was hovering over her.
Order first, text Ana next, then try to chill for an hour with her book until the ferry came in.