7. Chapter 7
seven
W hite noise rings in my ears following Ethan’s words. What did he just say?
Ares suddenly steps forward with narrowed, determined eyes. “But you are also mine. You must be.”
I part my lips to speak, but no words come out. What can I even say to these claims?
“I… I need some air. Can someone please open a window?”
Ethan nods and heads toward his bedroom window to open the pane, allowing a soft draft of fresh breeze in.
To my surprise, Ares approaches me and scoops me up in his arms, holding me against his strong chest as he moves toward the open window.
I gradually relax against him, my eyebrows lifting in surprise as I feel the overwhelming heat in my body steadily settle down. This allows me to take a deep breath of fresh air to calm myself as their words go around and around in my head.
“I don’t understand. I should be able to recognize my mate, right?” I ask them as Ares stops in front of the window next to Ethan.
“Things can get complicated with the bond,” Ethan says. “Sometimes, you can recognize it immediately. Other times, it can be hard to make it out through all the noise.”
“What do you feel when you’re around us?” Ares asks as he gazes down at me.
I swallow hard as I feel their curious eyes on me. I can’t believe they both want me as theirs, but as Ethan said, these things are complicated. I just never expected them to be this complicated.
“I feel… wanted,” I admit as my eyes sweep back and forth between them. “I know that I’m happier than I was before I met the both of you.”
Ethan smiles, while the corner of Ares’ mouth turns up. Satisfaction radiates from both of them. All they’ve done since meeting me is take care of me, and I appreciate that more than they know after years of being pushed around by the headmistress.
“But I don’t know what to do… about the bond,” I say.
Ethan and Ares share a brief look before Ares speaks first. “It’s your choice.”
I blink, surprised by his words. “I can choose?”
Ares nods. “It’s your decision, but I won’t share.”
My jaw nearly drops open as I watch Ares growl at Ethan. I grip his shirt, drawing his gaze down to mine. “Don’t! I don’t want you two fighting.”
“The decision is up to you whether you want one of us or both of us,” Ethan says .
Both of them? My heart leaps as my cheeks redden.
“I’m not sharing,” Ares argues, his hold on me tightening.
I place my hand on Ares’ cheek, capturing his attention again and getting him to relax before he accidentally crushes me with his strength.
Ares grunts, his eyes still narrowing.
“I’m not ready to choose,” I say, my words coming out in a whisper as our eyes lock.
A long exhale drifts from his nose. His eyes slip down to my lips for a moment, and my desire soars. He doesn’t move, and I know he’s waiting on me.
Right now, I want to kiss him more than anything else in the world. I slip my hand around to the back of his neck, my fingertips teasing the ends of his hair. I pull him closer and press my lips against his. Feeling them mold together, sparks erupt between us.
Ares stills at first as his arms tense around me.
“Kiss me,” I whisper against his lips. “Please, Ares.”
He maneuvers me, guiding my legs around his waist as he holds the backs of my thighs.
“Ares,” I breathe as he claims my lips. My legs wind around his waist tighter as our bodies press together. The heat from his skin seeps into mine as every curve and dip from his hard body rubs over me.
Our lips part, and his tongue finds mine, dancing, swirling around each other as my core begs for more.
Placing my hand on his chest, I break the kiss and earn a small growl. My lips curl into a smile, and I reach for Ethan.
He takes my hand without hesitation and steps closer, his free hand caressing my cheek. He doesn’t stop. He closes the distance between our lips until I feel the sparks again. My soul is lashing out, weeping for more .
Ares’ lips graze my neck, brushing over the marking spot. My back automatically arches as my hands reach for them. One hand rests on Ares’ chest while the other cups the back of Ethan’s head. Warmth washes over me, wave after wave, threatening to pull me under the surface.
And yet, I want more, crave more, not daring to let this moment slip through my fingers. Not when I can finally have it all.
A deep, throaty growl rumbles from Ares in warning, prompting Ethan to draw away from me.
Ares’ hold on me tightens as the scales return, scratching my skin as I whimper.
“You need to leave,” Ethan says to me as he grabs me under my arms and pulls me from Ares’ hold.
Ares’ breathing turns rapid, and steam radiates from his body.
“What’s happening?” I ask as my eyes widen.
“He’s losing control. He’ll shift soon, and you don’t need to be around him when he does,” Ethan warns me as he takes my hand and tugs me toward the door.
I glance back at Ares, meeting his dragon’s eye one last time.
“Wait, I don’t want to leave you. What if you get hurt?” I ask as Ethan nudges me out the door.
With a comforting grin, he shakes his head. “I’ll be okay. I don’t want anything happening to you. Ares wouldn’t want that, either.”
As much as I want to stay with them, I know that leaving is for the best. I nod and hurry out of the room, pausing for a second to glance in the room one more time just as Ares’ large wings spring out from his back. Nearly breathless, I stumble down the hallway and head toward the orphanage, hoping that Ethan will be fine as the sound of bricks tearing to pieces nearly deafens me and the ground rumbles under my feet.
Tension grips my shoulders the entire way until I eventually find the headmistress. My chest tightens as I wonder what she has been hiding from me my entire life.
I approach her as she peers out a window at the clear blue sky. “I’m here. What do you have to give me?”
The headmistress turns away from the window and faces me, letting her eyes sweep over me. “I thought he would’ve marked you already.”
My face burns as I remember Ares’ lips on my neck. If he wasn’t about to lose control, would he have marked me? No… I don’t believe that. He was insistent that the decision of whom to be with is up to me.
Truly, I don’t know what decision to make. I don’t know what’s right or what’s smart. But I do want to believe them when they say they are my mates, even when I don’t recognize them as my soul doesn’t scream their names at me.
“What was given to you?” I ask, wanting to get to the point of why she called me here.
The headmistress reaches into a brown satchel attached to her waist and pulls out an old book with a dusty cover. She doesn’t bother to wipe it off before placing it in my hands. “I don’t know what’s inside. It’s sealed with a spell, and I believe you’re the only one who can open it.”
“Why do you think that?” I ask, turning the book over in my hands, my fingertips grazing over the brown cover.
“When the witches brought you here and gave me the book, they told me to give it to you when you turned eighteen. Whatever it is, it’s meant for you to figure out. I never saw them again after that,” the headmistress says.
Witches? She always said I was brought here by my parents.
“Did they say anything else? Anything about me?” I ask, a tinge of desperation in my voice.
“All they told me is that you’re a Netherling. Perhaps they were running from something and thought you were safer here,” the headmistress tells me.
I breathe in deeply, trying to steady my racing heart.
“Thank you,” I say as I hold the book against my chest. I always thought she hated me, and she could’ve tossed the book away or kept it for herself, but now I wonder if there’s more that she’s keeping from me.
The headmistress nods. “I can’t be of any more help.”
I nod back and watch her walk off, leaving me there alone with a book of mystery which I have no idea how to open.
I try to pry the pages open, but they don’t budge. I try to tear off the cover, but nothing happens.
Some sort of energy radiates underneath my fingertips, and I swear it’s almost like it’s reaching out to me.
With it pressed to my chest, I hurry to my room and sit on the edge of my bed with the book in my lap. The cover is plain, and I can see my fingerprints in the dust. I wipe the cover clean and drift my fingertips along the edges of the pages. “Come on. Please.”
I breathe in deeply and close my eyes, holding the book tightly and focusing on the energy beneath my fingers. Focusing on the magic I’m sure it contains.
My fingers buzz. An energy glows in my chest. I feel… Power. A link.
My grip on the book tightens as I focus on the connection, sensing it grow and reach further until the book flies open to one page with words scribbled on the yellowish paper. My jaw drops and my eyes widen in shock as I stare down at the open book, reading the words written in black ink.
I don’t regret what I have done to you, and perhaps someday, you’ll know the truth.
But we couldn’t live in fear any longer.
I have to make it right, what we have done all those years ago.
I’ve tried countless times, but my shame and fear of him always stood in my way.
This time will be different.
It has to be.
The words stare at me, and tears prickle my eyes as I read it again and again.
With a shuddery breath, I flip through the other pages, only to find that they’re completely blank. Furrowing my brow, I check again, making sure that I’m not missing anything, but that page is the only one with a message written on it. A disappointed sigh leaves me as I touch the ink with my fingertips.
I thought this would have some truth about my parents, something about my lineage. But now I know, as a heavy weight settles in my chest, that I’ll never meet them. I’ll never know them. All I have is this cryptic message that I can’t make much sense of.
Even after all of this, I feel more lost than ever before. I still don’t know who I am or why they kept me hidden.
And with desire burning through every inch of me, I won’t find the answer until I make a choice.
But whom should I give my heart to?