Chapter 18
RAFE
The shift in Alex’s demeanor on the way home was gradual, becoming more pronounced the closer we got to Dante’s Pass. I left the SUV in the parking lot at the boat launch site, like Jax instructed, and found my boat docked in the small marina where he said it would be.
But she handled the ride across the Columbia River with a degree of stoicism that bordered on impressive, and that pushed the needle on my worry meter up another notch.
I remembered the despair in her voice and the hopelessness in her eyes as we fucked in the car, and the memory made me want to pound on something.
Or someone.
I hoped like hell Zach hadn’t broken her, but the true test lay ahead on a patch of land that had been renovated to give us the fresh start we’d hoped for.
Pulling up to the island’s private dock, I secured the boat before grabbing her hand. “Ready?”
She nodded, but I sensed all she didn’t say.
There was no easy way to return to the trauma of this place, to face the remnants of horror, not to mention the real life monster in the cellar.
That first step inside felt oddly normal.
The cabin seemed undisturbed, everything in its place, until I tried ushering Alex upstairs.
“I can’t,” she said, digging in her heels.
She wrenched her hand from mine and folded herself inside the safety of her own embrace, and I hated how she backed away, putting inches of space and emotional barriers between us.
I glanced toward the ceiling, envisioning the loft bedroom and the ensuite bathroom, and wondered what kind of special hell Zach had put her through up there.
A huge part of me didn’t want to know, certain I couldn’t handle all the details, though I’d force them out of her eventually if she didn’t spill on her own accord.
“It’s okay. We’ll sleep on the couch tonight,” I said, directing her toward the bathroom on the main floor. “But we need a shower first.” She didn’t argue as I switched on the spray. Mud-caked jeans and blood-stained clothing dropped to the floor, and we stepped underneath the hot water.
Expression subdued, Alex traced the split in my lip and the discoloring on my cheekbone. “Does it hurt?”
“Not too bad.” I grabbed a bar of soap and worked up a lather in my hands before running my soapy palms over her body. She sighed as I turned her around and massaged her shoulders.
“Jax said it was a death match.”
“It was.”
The next few seconds stabbed at my conscience.
“So the other guy is…?”
“Dead.” The admission was a choked finality on my breath, void of absolution. “So is Shelton.”
“Rafe…” She whirled around and took my abused face between her hands. “You survived. Isn’t that what you told me?”
I blinked the spray of the shower from my lashes. “I did what I had to so Will could go home. Doesn’t mean I’m okay with taking another life, especially someone who didn’t deserve it.”
“But Shelton deserved it.”
“The guy I choked tonight in the cage didn’t.”
“You didn’t have a choice.”
“We all have choices, just like I made the choice to leave you here less than twenty-four-hours after I promised to love you forever.”
“Does that promise still hold true?”
“Of course it does, baby. But that doesn’t mean you should forgive—”
Her lips on mine shut me up, and her temptress fingers wrapping around my cock obliterated thought. Thrusting my tongue into her mouth, I groaned into the kiss as we stumbled across the stall to the opposite wall.
I gripped her by the ass and pushed into her as her legs tightened around me. Her cunt gloved me to madness, igniting a frenzy that rivaled our desperation in the SUV. I pumped into her violently, shoving her up the slick tile as the shower spray cocooned us in steam.
“I’m gonna come,” she gasped, severing our lips.
“Damn right you are.”
There was no guilt, no hesitation holding her hostage this time—she contracted around me, eyes squeezed shut as her lips parted in a breathless cry.
I was pretty sure those sexy lips formed my name, and her surrender spawned my own release, pulling it from me with the strength of a wrench.
My fingers dug into her skin, jerking her tight against me as I spilled inside her.
Afterward, we clung to each other, breathing hard, still joined as we came down from the intensity of the moment. Eventually, her legs slid from around my waist, and she planted her feet on the ground. I pushed her wet, tangled locks off of her forehead.
Words weren’t needed.
Not with the way she looked at me, eyes red from the tears she’d spilled, lids heavy from exhaustion.
We finished washing up, then I wrapped her in a towel and carried her to the sofa.
The hour was late, past three in the morning.
She settled on one end and curled into a ball, falling asleep almost immediately.
I grabbed a quilt from the linen closet, and she didn’t stir as I spread the blanket over her resting body.
Leaning down, I pressed a kiss to her temple, and that’s when I remembered the gold chain around her neck. Gently lifting her, I worked the key over her head and pulled it over mine, where it belonged.
A trip upstairs revealed the disaster of our bedroom, and the rumpled sheets on our bed drew my eye, stirring my anger. The restraint system straps hung to the floor, a vision of mockery because I knew what they’d been used for.
Thank God I hadn’t forced her up here.
I grabbed the first pair of sleep pants I found and dressed before heading back downstairs.
The kitchen held additional horrors. During the trip home, Alex told me what to expect near the breakfast nook, so I’d known there was a bloody mess to deal with, but knowing about it and seeing it were two very different things.
I mopped up Zach’s downfall then made the bastard a sandwich, since he’d gone without food for two days, and I wouldn’t stoop to his level.
Not yet.
Not until I decided what to do with him.
Flipping the light on in the cellar, I found him sprawled on the cot inside the prison I’d designed for Alex.
When I’d had that space built, I sure as fuck hadn’t intended for Zach to end up in it, wearing the shock collar I’d purchased as a last-resort idea to keep her safe, should she ever get fancy ideas in her head that would put her in danger.
Instead, I’d been the asshole to put her in danger, and I’d do everything in my power to make up for it for the rest of my life.
Zach stirred with a groan, and when he rolled over and faced me, I did a double-take. His date with Alex’s skillet, not to mention Jax’s fists, had done a real number on him. Matted blood covered the left side of his head, and his right eye was swollen shut.
Sauntering to the bars separating us, I tossed the plastic storage bag containing two PB&Js onto the concrete floor. “Wouldn’t want you to die from starvation.”
Though he deserved that and more.
Zach tumbled off the cot and crawled toward the food, his eyes flicking up to meet mine every couple of seconds.
“No thank-yous, huh?” I said as he began scarfing down the first sandwich.
“Don’t do me any fucking favors,” he mumbled, a scowl in his tone.
“I didn’t.” Returning his scowl, I clasped my hands at my back and stared down my nose at him. “Alex did. She turned the water back on before she left to come get me, which was more than you did for her. You’d be dead if she’d matched your sense of empathy.”
His attention veered behind me, and he didn’t have to voice the question.
“You think she wants to see you after everything you did?”
With a frown, he started in on the second PB&J. “She cares about me. Why else would she turn the water back on?”
“Did you care about the spiders you used to release outdoors?”
“I cared enough not to kill them.”
“Some people like to catch insects and put them in jars. That’s what you are right now—a bug in a jar.” A sadistic smile pulled at my lips. “Trapped and vulnerable to a kid with a magnifying glass and enough sunlight.”
“So you’re gonna torture me, is that it?”
“I’m not gonna do anything. I’ll leave your fate up to Alex.”
“I’m glad to hear that. Her choice might surprise you.
” A hint of a smile twitched at his lips, and I wanted to wipe it off his face with my fist. I didn’t buy into his delusions for a second, but just the idea that he thought he could win her over after the hell he’d put her through—not just in the past several days but for years—sent rage rushing through my veins.
“Alex is stronger than you ever gave her credit for. I have no doubt she’ll make the right decision.”
It didn’t matter how much I knew deep in my gut that Alex despised this mother fucker—his smug certainty followed me upstairs, haunting every breath long after I shut off the light and slammed the door.