Chapter 1 #2
Three men I loved who turned on me with a rabid fury.
But I was in the presence of another monster.
Even with this interlude, I wouldn’t let my guard down.
My body throbbed with the echo of their anger.
It would have broken a weaker woman, but I wasn’t so easily snapped.
Ellington could needle me until the sun came up.
He was just a convenient exit from the dark. When I regrouped, I would kill him.
“Are you going to tell me what tipped them over? Don’t tell me they actually fell for your seduction?” His chuckle was a shadow that choked the air out of my lungs, and I clenched my hands despite myself.
“It was real. I know you can’t fathom love because you’re used to using everyone around you, but I wasn’t faking.” I shook my head, nostrils flared as I fought to remain blank-faced.
Neither were they, which was why it hurt so much. How could they love me and hurt me in the same breath?
“That’s even worse,” he sneered. “Don’t you know falling for your target is the easiest way to end up dead? Oh, wait.”
His words wormed their insidious way through my ribs and pierced my heart. My lies were only half the reason my entire body ached right now. The other was because of my heart. Because I’d let the stupid organ rule my decisions and fall for three men.
I let out a harsh exhale. “Shut your mouth.”
“I’m going to put that idiotic comment down to a possible concussion. When you’re healed, I think you’ll come around to me.”
His cajoling tone wound its way around me, but the sweetness tasted bitter in the back of my throat. Ellington was the most formidable opponent I’d ever had, and the pity radiating off him made me snap. He continued when I didn’t reply.
“I won’t underestimate you like your boyfriends. We’d be an unstoppable team. I even promise not to blackmail you this time.”
My heart crashed against my ribs, and adrenaline flooded my veins like an old friend. I knew this feeling. Panic that threatened to steal all logic, the fear that forced my muscles to seize. I picked at the seams of its sharp confines and breathed. This wasn’t the time for emotion.
“Stop talking.” My eyes clenched shut.
I’d survived my worst fear and still lived.
I stared out the window at the blurred city rushing by. Ray said he’d stop at nothing to make me pay for the lies I’d told. Stupidly, I thought our love would win out, and he’d see my reasons and understand. What about the future? What were we now?
Nothing. Broken. Ashes. In the end, lies had burned us into nothing before we could be anything else. Right now, I had to focus on the present. Ellington was trying to get under my skin because he wanted me in his pocket.
“Fine. Sit back and enjoy the ride and your commitment to delusion.”
I flinched. The midnight-blue sky being swallowed by black flashed through my mind.
“I-it’s not like that.” The cuts on my tongue slurred the protest.
“You and Connall have potential if you could get over your pesky mistrust of me. I mean, if I hadn’t dug you up, what would have happened to you?”
I fought the urge to tell him exactly where the mistrust stemmed from, focusing instead on the rhythm of the car. He pulled out of Greenich Bay and down one of the winding roads east. We crested a hill. A fluttering of panic battered against the numb shell hardening around me.
“I think you’re lashing out because The Unseen won’t let you slink away and build a new empire.” My voice somehow sounded steady, even as my hands shook.
“Poor girl. I’m going to enjoy enlightening you.” Ellington’s eyes were cold slate as the dark road took us deeper into the abyss. “You act like I didn’t give you a choice. Imagine how long The Unseen has been brainwashing you. It’s longer than you think.”
My heart collided with desperation as sweat peppered my upper brow, and my thoughts turned slow. What was he talking about? Either I work for him or watch innocent people die. Up ahead, the slight hill fell away, and an expanse flattened out the winding road.
Down.
Down.
Down my thoughts went.
“What are you talking about?” The taste of iron coated my throat as I waited for Ellington to spin another lie.
“Do you know how far they’ll go for an asset like you or me? You weren’t the only liar. Beck keeps his secrets, too.”
My nose stung. A brief thought flashed into my head. I could reach out and grab the wheel. Roll this fucking car and both of us in it. What else did I have to lose? What was Beck hiding from me? I couldn’t let myself believe. But then I remembered Adelaide. There was a chance she would understand.
“You’re lying.”
“We’ll see,” Ellington shot back in a singsong voice.
The tires screamed as Ellington veered off the road, and my stomach flipped as the car leaned to the left. My pulse hammered in my ears.
“What are we doing here?”
“I’m giving you another choice.” He jerked his head toward my necklace. “Toss it and come with me. Give me a chance to show you my evidence.”
“Fuck you.”
“I’m a one woman man, and she’s dead.” Ellington’s gaze was a well of steel.
There was something deep, haunting in the depths there. I hesitated before I snapped.
“I don’t believe you, and I don’t care.” The words fell off my injured tongue, careless. Why now? Why was he cajoling me after blackmailing me all these months?
“What about your mom? Do you care about her? About the true reason she’s dead?”
His words sucked all the air out of the car. The midnight sky swung low, crushing me under its endless dark. My mom? I tasted iron at the back of my throat, and bile rose to meet it.
“More lies,” my voice scraped.
Ellington shrugged. A challenge hovered in the space between us.
My mom. Her death was the reason I joined The Unseen. I hadn’t ever wanted to feel as small and powerless as I did at that moment. It flickered around the edges, the weakness. I could step off a precipice with a monster, one who I had no business trusting.
But, I couldn’t say no.
I sucked in a tiny breath, braced myself for a second before I turned my back to Ellington.
“Do it.”
Ellington’s fingers brushed against the back of my neck, and every single muscle in my body cried out in agony, even my brain. Everything blurred and fuzzy after being tossed in the goddamn dirt. Black wavered at the edges of my vision, and I clamped my teeth down on my bottom lip.
I would not pass out, not now. I would survive.
The chain slipped into my filthy hand, and I cradled it for a second. Ray’s necklace was slick with my blood. I opened the door and tossed it into the dark.
Where it, and I belonged.
If what Ellington said was true, this wasn’t rock bottom for me. If there was more to my mom’s death, could I handle it? I didn’t have three men at my back anymore. Now, they were barriers to the truth.
I’d survived the dark. Once. Twice. I’d drag answers from Ellington if it meant going to the underworld myself.