Chapter 9 .4
His jaw clenched, he huffed, then he pushed my shoulders slightly back so that I was sort of suspended in midair. He used my legs to keep a firm hold on me, pulling me tighter to him while driving so deep into me that it felt like he was hitting parts he shouldn’t be hitting.
“You can’t leave me, Tia.”
Now it was more like a plea instead of a demand. Was that pain in his eyes now?
I had nothing to hold onto, my abs were killing me. I grabbed at my stomach and he spun me around so that I had the bed to lie on and now he was standing up, pummeling me from standing, pulling my legs up, driving in so deep that I cried out. This was sweet, sweet pain and with the look on his face, the sexy expression… I became lightheaded. He was so sexy I would’ve swooned if I wasn’t already horizontal.
As he plunged into me, he tweaked my clit with his thumb, almost in a strumming motion and the heated stare, the sensation, and the feeling of him sliding in and out at that rapid pace all culminated in a loud moan from me as I hit another peak. But he wasn’t done.
I was flipped to my belly, my ass in the air as he drove into me from behind. Ramming hard, fingers gripping my hips, and then out of nowhere he made a low growling sound and a stinging slap rang across on my ass.
I jolted, dislodged him, but he grabbed my hips and rammed back in, eliciting a squeaking protest from me. He gripped my rear hard with his hand and I didn’t know if I loved it or hated it. His breathing pace changed and then he groaned my name as he came. I collapsed face first on the bed under the weight of him pinning me. He stayed half on top of me for a few minutes and the feel of his breath on my neck, of his heart pounding through his chest against my back, it gave me a weird feeling, a peaceful feeling.
He gathered my hair to one side and ran his fingers through it.
“I’m sorry,” he whispered against my ear. “It’ll take time for us to trust one another. I want us to have a good day together. Still upset?”
“Not really,” I answered, but in truth I wasn’t sure how to feel.
“Did I fuck you into submission?” I felt him smile against my shoulder and then he planted a soft kiss there.
“I think you might’ve.” I smiled, too.
He rolled me onto my side and spooned me. “I may do that often, you know?” He kissed my ear and gave me a squeeze. “But you didn’t submit 100%, did you?”
I knew he wanted that, “yes, I’m yours” from me, and I hadn’t given it. But, he didn’t seem angry right now.
“Mm, maybe ninety-ish,” I said.
He let out a little laugh.
“Progress,” he murmured. “Huge progress.”
I heard a flock of birds overhead and as they flew over the barn and the expanse of the property and I sighed with relief and euphoria blended together. “It’s lovely here.”
“I love it here,” he said. “I needed to feel like you were safe. Home wasn’t safe. Here feels better.”
I turned over and put my arms around him, nuzzling into his chest. His bruises were fading. I felt safe there, then, in his arms, which was the strangest thing because I’d probably never known actual true danger before I’d met him. I traced his tattoo with my finger and enjoyed the feel of a gentle breeze that swooped through the loft.
I hadn’t earned it yet. I hadn’t earned a “Yes, I’m yours.” I hadn’t earned, “I love you, Tommy” yet. But I would.
After making love, we just stayed in bed, her in my arms, for the longest time. It was funny to think of it as “making love” instead of fucking, like it’d always been, but I guess my mindset had started to shift. Did it qualify as making love if it was a little rough? To me it did. I loved her and I wanted her. I was expressing that love and that hunger with my body.
She cuddled into me and drew circles on my arm and then my back with her fingertips and then I did it back and she squirmed. She made me feel like a teenager. A horny teenager who couldn’t get enough of her and who, in that moment at least, didn’t care if it was vanilla, chocolate, or blackjack berry thunder as long as it was with her.
“You’re very ticklish,” I told her. “I like how you squirm against me when I tickle you.”
She blushed and batted her eyelashes at me.
“Why don’t we warm up those sandwiches and eat and then we’ll go fishing?” I suggested and tapped her on the ass. She smiled and stretched.
I got out of bed and popped the bag into the microwave. She got up and put a new pair of panties on, a sexy silky pair that I’d bought her, put a matching bra on, and then pulled the yellow cotton dress over her head and started hunting for something to put her flowers into. I found her a mason jar that was down in one of the stalls and she cleaned it, put the bouquet in, and then put the yellow strap back around the waist of her dress.
We ate and then I walked her downstairs and pulled out the new fishing rods I’d bought that morning. I bought her a pink one and she thought it was hilarious that it was pink like her new toothbrush. We made our way down to the pond where I put the worm on for her and taught her how to cast. She was a natural; she caught twice as many fish as I did, but wouldn’t touch the worm or the fish. I finally grabbed her as she muttered “one more cast” for the fifth time and carried her back to the barn over my shoulder.
“We’ve been fishing all day. We have reservations, no more casts.”
She giggled as I put her down near the bed and reached for my keys. She wanted five minutes to freshen up and grab her purse, so I waited in the Jeep for her, thinking about the fact that I had to go to Vegas for some business and that I didn’t want to leave her at the house.
I didn’t want to leave her because, a) I still wasn’t content the security issues that plagued me after Earl and then after the shooting yesterday were totally resolved. I knew that there’d very likely be blowback from what I did in Mexico because Castillo had a nephew who was semi- local. He was a small-time drug dealer and thug and it was him and his guys that’d breached security and gotten in by scaling up and in from behind the swimming pool. A taller fence was being put in today to make sure no one could get in that way.
Still, I needed to see that nothing would go wrong before trusting anything. And besides, b) I hated the thought of her not being beside me at night. What a one-eighty from congratulating myself so frequently that I had my king size bed all to myself to now aching for her when she wasn’t in my sights. The night I’d taken her to dinner and the beach when I’d left her alone for the night had been a long cold and sleepless night in a guest room without her warmth wrapped around me. The nights in Mexico without her had been torment, not feeling her, not hearing her breathing.
The Japanese restaurant I took her to was almost empty. The hostess I’d talked to that morning wasn’t in sight. The rest of the staff welcomed us and pointed to a table. She didn’t know what to order so I told her I’d order for us.
She examined everything carefully and skeptically but tried every dish that the server put in front of her after having first asked the waiter about shellfish. The waiter had waved her concerns off because of what we’d ordered but he didn’t speak very clear English. She was good-natured about it despite telling me she hadn’t been a very adventurous eater in life so far.
“No shit, Miss Vanilla Ice Cream is my Favorite,” I teased.
She blushed bright pink. “Until I found you, Mr. Blackjack Berry Thunder. Or should I say, until I was betrothed to you.”
She didn’t look unhappy when she said that. I smiled at her. “I’m expanding your palate, and your horizons.” I wiggled my eyebrows at her.
She wiggled hers back at me. “Mm hm. So you’re off on a business trip?” she added.
I scrunched up my face. “Yeah.”
“Unpleasant business?” she asked, then she added, “Or should I not ask?”
I shook my head. “I’m just not looking forward to leaving you at home. I’m thinking I should take you with me.”
“Really? Why? Where?” She looked excited and the idea of her being happy to come with me instead of having time without me felt good. Real good.
“Yeah, it’s too soon for me since the security breaches at home to feel comfortable, so I don’t know that I’d be all that productive unless you were with Dare. But he’s too wrapped up with work shit to be your bodyguard 24/7. I’m vetting a few of my senior guys and will make a decision soon about rotations for security for the house. And I’m not sure I want to be without you.”
She blushed and smiled at me.
“So, tomorrow maybe after we see your foster parents we can go home and pack for Vegas.”
Her face lit up, “Vegas?”
I nodded. She clapped her hands and then was suddenly downtrodden.
“What?” I asked.
“I’m nineteen. Vegas isn’t fun unless you’re twenty-one.” She pouted.
“Unless you’re a high roller,” I said. “No one will card you when you’re with me, baby girl.”
Her smile returned. She took a sip of her Japanese green tea and then started to scratch at her chest. I leaned forward because I could see big blotchy hives across her neck and cleavage. She was a little pale.
“What’s wrong?”
“I don’t know. I hope nothing we ate had any shellfish.”
She didn’t look good at all.
“You’d better go make yourself puke, Tia. Now!” I waved the waiter over as she dashed to the bathroom. I tried to talk to the waiter, but he kept telling me no to the shellfish question. Clearly, she was having a reaction to the fucking food. Bonehead.
I burst into the bathroom, finding her sitting on the floor beside the toilet in a cold sweat and she looked like death warmed over. Fuck!
I pulled out my phone and called 9-1-1. They were too slow, so I called back from the Jeep and told them never mind. I’d carried her to it then sped down the highway to the hospital five minutes away, carrying her in myself, losing my shit until they rushed out and got her on a gurney. She’d still been conscious, but she was covered in hives and she told me her heart was racing.
By the time she was stuck with a needle, stable, and admitted in the little country hospital I’d found out the restaurant’s miso soup’s secret family ingredient was clams. The hostess had originally had no idea because it was a secret recipe, and the waiter was a fucking bonehead for not alerting the kitchen.
She was going to be fine. They’d given her epinephrine and wanted to watch her overnight. I spent the night in the chair in her room.
In the morning, I called her foster parents and told Cal Crenshaw we couldn’t make brunch and I explained what had happened.
Two hours later they turned up in the waiting room, despite my telling them on the phone that she’d be fine and that they didn’t need to come. I never should’ve told them what hospital we were at.
I wasn’t pleased about it because I wasn’t on the ball after barely sleeping. They approached me all judgmental-looking in the hall while I was on the phone with my brother, dealing with some business stuff and giving him an update, telling him to keep everyone there, that I’d bring Tia home the following day rather than come straight home. I wasn’t ready to step back into my regular life quite yet.
“Mr. Ferrano? Cal Crenshaw. My wife Rose,” the tall, fair, thin professor-looking guy greeted, then shook my hand quickly. His wife, a short Italian woman, held her hands together firmly in front of herself while shooting daggers at me with her eyes.
“Glad to meet you,” I said. And then I almost lost my shit totally because coming up the corridor directly behind the Crenshaws was Gregory fucking O’Connor. I recognized him from the photo I’d been given. He was looking at me, looking like he wanted to shit his pants.
“We called Tia’s father,” Rose Crenshaw said, shooting more eye daggers at me.
Great.
Hoh, boy…did I ever feel like shit. Tommy was like a scary, psychotic madman trying to get me help when we got here. And he’d been here since last night doting on me, holding my hand while I slept, yelling at nurses to make sure I had more pillows, more blankets, etcetera. He was like the worst den mother I’d ever seen.
I was getting out of here today. The doctor told me I needed to carry an epi pen with me all the time. I’d always found it easy to keep my allergy under control because I never ate in fancy places where they didn’t understand you when you asked them about their ingredients. Now things were obviously different.
Tommy told me we’d go back and relax for the day at the farm if I wanted, and then we’d go home tomorrow and pack for the trip to Vegas. The quiet of the loft sounded good to me, and then seeing the bright lights and Sin City would be fun. The only place I’d ever been was Florida that once, and the idea of travel really appealed to me.
My hospital room door opened, and in walked Rose and Cal. Shocked, I felt my heart constrict. Did Tommy know they were here? Where was he? Rose quickly hugged me and Cal stood behind her.
“How are you, Tia?” Cal asked as Rose dabbed her eyes with a tissue.
“I’m fine, don’t worry. Good as new.”
“I know you’re fine from the allergic reaction but what about everything else?” she asked. Her eyes landed on my hand and widened at the sight of the engagement ring.
“Actually, I’m really good,” I tried to reassure her. I had to oversell it so that they’d just back off. Plus I was pretty good, all things considered. “Things are working out after all.”
She opened her mouth to speak, but I stopped her. “Seriously. I’m good. I think we’re getting married in a few weeks and I’d like you to both be there.” I smiled at her.
Her mouth dropped open and she looked at me like I was a puzzle to her.
I looked to Cal and as I said, “I hope you’ll consider doing the favor of giving me away? If it’s not too much to ask…” The door opened and Tommy walked in with his hands in his pockets. He didn’t look surprised to see them. I let out the breath I’d been half-holding.
Cal looked back at Tommy and then to his wife. He looked a little perplexed. Rose was giving Tommy the evil eye.
“Maybe before then we could get a rain check on that lunch or brunch idea, so you can get to know Tommy?” I said quickly.
“I’d be honored to walk you down the aisle, Tia. Thank you but wouldn’t you rather your own dad? He’s –”
“You’ve been a dad to me. He’s only biologically my father, Cal. You’ve been there for me, helping me with my homework, being stable and reliable…”
(Not selling me to the mafia…)
Lines crinkled around his eyes and he nodded. “Thank you. I’d be happy to.” Then his gaze swept over to Tommy. I bet he was thinking that he’d rather me not be marrying at this age and not be marrying this guy.
I looked at Tommy patted the side of the bed that was opposite where everyone stood. Tommy rounded the bed and sat on the edge and put his hand on mine.
Rose and Cal both looked confused. Rose’s face was red.
“You have another visitor, baby,” Tommy said as he leaned over and kissed my temple.
“Who?”
“Your father,” he said and my expression dropped.
“If you don’t want to see him…” he started.
“I don’t,” I stated.
“Okay.” Tommy rose and left the room.
Rose winced as she watched him leave. “He’s intense.”
She had no idea.
“Did you guys call my father?” I asked.
Rose turned her attention to me and nodded. “He came up with us. We wanted to talk to him about your… situation on the way here.”
“And what did he say?”
“Very little,” Cal said and lowered his voice. “First, he tried to brush things off when we described the visits from the police, what Susan had told us. Then he admitted that he’d gotten involved with some unsavory mafia types some years ago. They had demanded that you be handed over to marry the mobster’s son to settle an old vendetta. He was cryptic, but said he hadn’t given up on finding a way to get you out but was still working on it. We asked him to work together with us to help get you out of this safely and he told us he’d rather continue on his own, not involve us with the unsavory people he was talking to. Said that he’d already tried to barter, negotiate, but said this family was sort of above the law. We thought we’d come here and make sure you were okay and then see what this Tommy was like and go from here. We’re very worried about you.”
“You can’t believe a word out of Greg’s mouth,” I said stiffly. “He lies. I don’t know yet what happened with him and Tommy’s father, but you don’t have to worry about me. Tommy and I…we are fine.”
“You have a lovesick look about you,” Rose said, “And it’s very different from the way you were at the store last week.”
I smiled. “I’m fine. I’m happy. A lot has happened since then, Rose. My father is hiding something, I don’t know what yet, but please don’t work with him, don’t trust him. You don’t have to get me out of this. I am fine.”
“You hardly know him. What sorts of illegal activities is he into?”
“I think it’s probably not all that Hollywood hype, Rose.” I rolled my eyes. Inside, I saw flashes of that cargo plane, that pink canopy bed in that dank basement in Mexico, and then the bullet holes on the bedroom door back at Tommy’s house with the dead men in the hallway, and my blood ran icy cold.
A man in scrubs entered the room and brought me a tray of food. I thanked him and cautiously lifted the lid and then stuck my tongue out, “Eww.”
“We should go,” Cal looked at his wristwatch. “We will go have a word with your fiancé about getting together. In the meantime, we’re just a phone call away if you need us, day or night, okay?” He leaned over and kissed my forehead. “No surf and turf for you!” He smiled.
I smiled. “Thank you so much for driving all the way up here.”
He left the room. Rose leaned over and kissed my cheek. “I suspect you’re not telling me everything but what can I do? You tell me to back off and I trust you. You’re really okay?”
My heart flared with emotion. “I am,” I said. “Tommy can’t control who his father is any more than I can control who my father is. It doesn’t mean that Tommy’s a bad guy.”
“But your father said–”
“Don’t trust my father. He is a lying liar who lies out of his lying liar hole.”
“And those people who visited us and tried to get us to stop talking to the police – and them stopping you from talking to me at the supermarket.”
“Rose, I’m fine. A lot is going on. It’s too much to explain right now. Please trust me.”
“Why not move home? If he wants to see you, date you, go from there? My parents were so looking forward to having you.”
Tommy walked in as she said this and he obviously heard her.
I shook my head. “I’m fine. Please tell Nono and Nona I’m so sorry. I will try to visit soon.”
“I am happy to reimburse them the rent Tia would have paid until they find a suitable tenant,” Tommy offered softly.
“That won’t be necessary,” Rose bit off without looking in his direction. She looked at me skeptically. “I’ve been keeping Ruby and the girls in the dark a little. Ruby is getting impatient. I’ll have a talk with her.”
“I’ll call her as soon as I can.”
“She won’t understand and…”
I saw the alarm on Rose’s face, but then as she glanced in Tommy’s direction her stare hardened.
“I’m not going to tell her anything that will upset her.”
She gave me a sharp look. “You’re a good girl. Don’t be a martyr, though. Okay? No one is above the law. If you need help, we will find a way to help you. And carry an epi-pen, okay?”
I nodded.
“Call in a few days?”
I nodded again. “Tommy has a business trip and I’m going with him. When we get back, I’ll call.”
She squeezed my hand and left, giving Tommy a dirty look as she passed him.
I hadn’t sold them very well, I knew they were doubtful and worried, but I guessed it was enough. For now.
As she left, Tommy looked like he was trying to soften his hard expression. “What is that?” He looked down at my bowl.
“Cream of something soup. But of what, I don’t know, and I highly doubt this is even cream.” I lifted the spoon in the bowl and let some soup fall off the spoon and it was runny, gloopy, and filmy at the same time.
“Don’t eat that slop. I’ll get food for us on the way back. The doctor’s releasing you. You can get dressed.”
“My father?”
“Escorted him out. I need to make a call while you’re getting dressed. I’ll be back in ten.”
I watched him leave. He looked super-pissed. Dread worked its way through me.