Chapter 19 Beck
Beck
Life is fantastic and wonderful and exciting. All because of Nori. My beautiful, perfect Nori.
Until now I thought I understood what love was, but never did I imagine how all-encompassing it would feel to be in love.
Every waking hour I think of Nori, in my sleep I dream of her.
Each moment she’s not with me I long to be together again, to wrap her in my arms, to kiss her smiles, to lay her in my bed and make love to her all day and all night.
Never have I felt this happy before.
My blood simmers with my desire for Nori and my need to claim her the dragon way becomes stronger each day. How soon is too soon to ask her to marry me? I might need to ask Bodin how long he waited to ask Tilly. Or maybe Arran can advise me on proper courtship-to-marriage protocol.
Excited about my future, I tell my dragon, Let’s go for a swim. I want to play in the water.
My dragon perks up, his tail swinging from side to side as we head out just after dawn.
He’s been sulking a little after we had to say goodbye to Nori on Sunday night, but he knows she’ll be back on Friday again.
It’s been hard to leave the house this week because we both want to be around her lingering scent, but I still have duties to fulfill for Starry Hill.
I check my phone one more time to make sure there aren’t any new notifications from Nori, then head toward the dock.
So far I’ve filled up pages and pages in my notebook, sending snippets of my inspired thoughts to my muse as messages, and reading passages to her each night when she calls me from her place.
Some of the most fun we’ve had is me listening to Nori touch herself while I read to her, and her telling me how she’d satisfy me if we were together. After we both find our release, we count down the days until we can see each other again, then we exchange “I love yous” and fall asleep blissfully.
On the dock, I strip off my clothes and admire the scales that have been ever present since Saturday. Maybe they would’ve bothered me before, but Nori seems to like them well enough, so now I’ve simply accepted them as part of who I am.
I take a deep breath and shift midair as I dive into the crystalline water.
Staying under far longer than usual, I propel my serpentine body forward as the ocean washes over my heated skin.
From above, sunlight dapples down onto the sandy floor and fish scatter away from me as I enter their underwater world.
Ahead of me is nothing but boundless space, the ocean inviting me to explore and be refreshed as she embraces me like an old friend.
My dragon and I luxuriate in the freedom of the open water, diving down deep before bursting into the air again. Over and over again, we go under then break the surface with our horns, enjoying the way our long body feels as it undulates through the rhythmic waves.
Here, all my worries melt away and I simply exist. This is such a liberating feeling I want to share with Nori.
Especially this week considering how stressed she’s been with her job, much more than usual it seems. I only hope that one day she’ll feel comfortable enough to join me out in the open water like this.
I’ll take such good care of her, teach her about the ocean, and prove to her there’s nothing to fear.
Properly sated, physically tired yet feeling invigorated, I shift into my human form and set off for the town while my dragon drifts off to sleep.
All week I’ve been working on Nori’s reading corner next to the window in the living room. I’ve gotten her a plush chair and book cart and other items recommended by Lucille. Now I only need to pick up the handmade blanket from Peregrine at The Crowned Boot before it’ll all be ready.
I can’t wait to surprise Nori tonight. I hope she likes it.
“Morning,” a deep voice greets, jolting me out of my daydream.
I take a step back as I spot Arran leaning against a tree. I must be so lost in thought, I didn’t sense the vampire. Not even my dragon bats an eye at him as he rolls over and goes back to sleep.
“You’re out during the day,” I observe.
“Aye,” Arran answers. “I’m wearing sunscreen.”
“I’m sure you are, or else you’d be burning,” I say, walking closer. I can count on one hand the times I’ve seen Arran out before sunset, so this seems like more than a spontaneous walk around the island.
“True,” Arran replies with a small nod. “So where are you off to on such a fine morning?”
My chest puffs out as I say proudly, “I’m picking up something for Nori. I made her a reading corner.”
“Courting going well then, I assume.” Arran smiles one of his rare smiles, and I wonder what it would take for him to fully feel joy the way I do today.
Would falling in love with someone unlock that part of him? What kind of creature could make him want to venture beyond the walls of his castle that he hides behind?
Putting away those questions for the time being, I answer, “Courting has been very successful. Do you think it’s too soon to ask Nori to marry me?” That’s the real truth I need to know today.
“Aye.” The word is short, definitive, and doesn’t invite further argument.
My shoulders slump as my dragon lifts his head and narrows his eyes at Arran. “But I want to.”
Raising his brows, Arran asks, “Does she want to marry you?”
I sag onto a large rock as I give that some thought. “I think so. Maybe. She says she loves me. And she wants us to be together. Though maybe it would be simpler if she actually lived in Starry Hill.”
Arran looks around as if he’s searching for someone else to jump in and take over the conversation.
I understand that he might not have a lot of experience—or any for all I know—when it comes to love and marriage, but maybe he can give me advice based on his observations of others across the four hundred years he’s been alive?
Clearing his throat, Arran perches on a rock opposite me and says slowly, “That’s a step in the right direction at least. Maybe take things slow. Humans can be… unpredictable.”
“Not my Nori.” Scales wrap around my limbs as my dragon curls back his upper lip, ready to defend Nori from such slander.
Arran holds up both hands. “I don’t mean any offense. What do I know, after all? I’ve not courted someone in centuries. Times may have changed since I was young.”
Slowly, my scales recede but my dragon keeps a watchful eye. “I’ll keep that in mind. Maybe I should talk to Bodin or Tilly to get their opinions.”
“They’ll certainly be more knowledgeable than me regarding matters of the heart,” Arran agrees.
Needing to get back to neutral ground, I ask, “Where are you going?”
Arran runs a hand over his cropped hair. “Meeting with Calla at her place. There’s word of a werewolf who might need help and somewhere safe to rest for a while. We’re low on space at the minute, but we’ll make a plan.”
“You always do,” I say, noticing the dark circles under his eyes. “How can I help?”
“I’ll let you know once we have a timeline on when to expect him.”
“Arran?” I say after a moment’s hesitation.
“Hmm?”
I take a bracing breath, then say something I should’ve said a long time ago. “Thank you. For back then. For finding me and giving me a safe space too.”
Arran’s slight smile is full of understanding. “You’re welcome, Beck. That was always my intention with Starry Hill. To make it a refuge for creatures who need it most.”
“I… uhm…” Staring at my feet, I admit something that few but Arran will understand, wanting to share the huge step with my friend. “I started using my real name again, with Nori.”
His nod is full of approval. “I am glad to hear that.”
“I hope to one day be ready for the whole town to call me Shinsu too. Not yet, but hopefully soon. First, I need to explain to Nori why I stopped using it when I moved here.”
“Take your time,” Arran encourages. “She seems like a good one and she’ll understand. The town will understand too.”
We say goodbye and continue on our separate paths. I grab lunch from The Flowering Teapot, and the softest blue-and-orange crochet blanket from Peregrine, before popping by The Dancing Daisy to show Lucille.
When I get home, I put the final touches on the reading corner and place the bouquet of flowers Annamae grew for Nori in a vase. Then, I lower myself into her cozy new chair and wait.
Things have been really busy at work for Nori this week.
Regardless of working late most nights, she still makes time to talk to me for at least an hour before bed, plus she takes time to reply to love notes during the day too.
I try not to overwhelm her, but for the messages to be encouraging and help her get through the day.
I know how much she’s looking forward to this weekend and escaping from the city and that stupid fucking job that makes her so unhappy. I’m going to do everything in power to make her happy and forget about all her stress while she recoups here, with me and all her friends.
My first plan after I pick Nori up and feed her a delicious dinner, is to take her to The Singing Seahorse for karaoke.
I’m so excited for that because we’ll finally be able to perform the song we made up a dance for as kids, the same song I’ve been performing every Friday night for as long as I’ve been attending karaoke.
The sun inches closer to the horizon and I stare down at my phone just as it starts to ring. My whole body lights up as Eleanor’s name appears on the screen, my dragon loping up and down my chest with equal excitement.
“Nori,” I answer, a broad smile beaming from me as I say her name.
A beleaguered breath puffs across the line. “Hi, Shinsu.”
Feeling like this is a repeat of an event not so long ago, I shoot up out of the chair. “Where are you? At the harbor already? Are you okay?”
“I’m still at work.” Nori’s voice is weak, the words sounding like she’s wrestling them free.
“Okay?”
Nori hesitates then chokes out, “I… I don’t think I’m going to make it tonight.”
“We don’t have to go to karaoke.” If Nori is nervous about singing and dancing in front of the rest of the town, then I’m happy to stay home and cuddle her and kiss her and—
“I mean, I have to work late, again. I don’t think I can come to Starry Hill.” Nori sounds like she’s holding back tears, but I can’t tell if they’re sad or angry.
“How late?” I ask. “I can pick you up when you’re done. Even if it’s the middle of the night.”
“No,” Nori says quickly, her voice cracking on the word. She takes a trembling breath and continues, “Go out and enjoy karaoke with your friends. Don’t wait for me.”
I take a couple of seconds to process what she’s saying, then, needing to confirm, I ask slowly, “So, you’re not coming?”
Nori sniffs. “I’m going to try my best to come tomorrow, but I can’t make any promises.”
“Oh. I understand.” I don’t know if Nori is breaking up with me, but I’ve had conversations like this before, and I know where they lead.
My dragon’s head hangs and he retreats deep within my chest as I wilt into Nori’s chair.
“Please take care of yourself and get some rest too. And let me know when you’re ready to see me again.
” I try to keep my voice neutral and not to let my disappointment bleed through, even if it feels like a thousand papercuts are slicing at my heart.
“I’m sorry, Shinsu,” Nori whispers.
“Me too.”
“I love you.”
“I love you too.”
Nori doesn’t come on Saturday.
She doesn’t come on Sunday either.
My dragon is quiet. My scales gone. My heart empty as I remain in Nori’s chair, hoping this is some kind of nightmare I can wake up from.