Chapter 21 #2
Nori laces our fingers. “That last day I saw you when we were kids, do you remember it was the day before your thirteenth birthday? I was planning on giving you the bracelet the next day, and asking you to be my first kiss.”
My breath is knocked out of me at the realization, and my dragon retreats guiltily into my chest. Please don’t leave, I tell him. That’s all in the past. We’re looking to the future now.
I hold Nori’s face between my palms. “Nori, I may not have been your first kiss, but I want to be your last first kiss.”
“You already are,” she whispers as she leans forward and presses her mouth to mine.
The world outside of us dissipates into inconsequential atoms as we breathe each other in. Our tongues caress languidly like we have all the time in the world. Because we do. Today is the start of our life together and the end of our goodbyes.
Later that afternoon, when my stomach is full and my heart light, Nori asks, “Do you want to go for a swim?”
“Yes, but let’s go sit on the dock and watch the sunset together first. I want to tell you everything that happened to me the day I left.”
“Okay.”
Once outside, I eye the stack of luggage resting on the dock. Viggo did well with how quietly he was unloading, or maybe I was so disconnected with the world that I couldn’t hear him.
I lead Nori to the edge of the dock, to the same spot we had our first kiss not so long ago, and I relish in the calm beat of her heart. She’s not scared anymore and that means a lot to me.
My dragon hesitantly comes forward again and lifts his head toward the ocean, closing his eyes as he breathes in the salty air. Soon, I promise him. Nori first. He agrees wholeheartedly and gives me the space to explain our history to the woman we love.
In front of us, long, rolling ribbons of water stretch out toward the horizon and golden droplets of sunlight dance in the valleys of their swells.
I take Nori’s hand in mine, keeping my gaze straight ahead as I start talking.
“That day before my thirteenth birthday remains one of the happiest days of my life, because of you. But throughout that day, there was an odd sensation in my chest, almost like a scratching from the inside, and when I went back to my grandmother’s that evening, everything intensified.
It became an aching, roiling mess inside me, sending goose bumps all over my body which sharpened into pinpricks.
My grandmother sent me to bed early with some painkillers, promising to call a doctor in the morning if I still felt unwell. ”
Nervous scales flicker down my arms and Nori pulls my hand into her lap, calmly tracing them as she lends me her silent support.
I clear my throat. “That night, everything got worse. The pinpricks ruptured into scales covering my entire body, and from my head… two horns sprouted. I screamed when I saw myself, effectively summoning my grandmother who screamed even more. She called my father, who surprisingly, welcomed the news. At first. There hadn’t been a dragon in our line in a couple of generations, so they were unsure of what to do with me.
This also meant I wasn’t safe in their human neighborhood because I couldn’t control my dragon.
What if I shifted into his pure form right there?
What if I gave away my kin’s secrets? They couldn’t risk it. ”
Memories of that night, of the fear, the uncertainty, race through my mind. I needed to be comforted, needed a friend or a parent to hold me and tell me it was going to be okay. But I got none of that.
I wasn’t raised in a hugging family and physical contact was sparse, yet I still craved to be held that day, to be told I was going to be okay.
“The next day,” I continue, wanting to tell Nori every single detail, no matter how hard it is to relive it all, “I was forced to stay inside while I waited for my parents to collect me. All day, I watched you from my window. The way you sat on that swing in the backyard, waiting for me to show up, it pained me more than seeing my body covered in scales. Watching you gather the courage to come knock on my grandmother’s door, only to hear her tell you I went home without giving you a believable reason why, broke something in me.
The image of you crying as you walked away, and not being able to do anything about it, made me vow that one day when I could control my dragon, I’d come back to you and explain everything. ”
“It’s okay now. You found me,” Nori whispers.
“I’m sorry it took so long,” I whisper back.
“I went to your house right after I graduated, but you were already gone.” A different family had moved into Nori’s at that time and didn’t have any forwarding address for her.
I tried to contact her mother through a number the new owners gave me, but she pretended not to know who I was.
There’s no need to tell Nori this right now, not when her emotions are still raw after she decided to break all contact with her mother when she moved here.
Nori shakes her head and brushes one of my tears away. “You have nothing to apologize for. My heart hurt losing my friend, but I can’t imagine how hard it must’ve been for you to go through all of that alone.”
I take in a shaky breath, knowing this story is far from done.
My dragon sends scales across my chest, reinforcing me in his own way.
“When my parents arrived, they were proud to announce that they enrolled me at an exclusive boarding school for magical creatures tucked away in the middle of a forest, surrounded by all kinds of wards to keep humans out. I wasn’t allowed to leave there until I could shift at will and control the appearance of my scales and my horns.
Some students received glamour rings to help them control their shifts, but my father refused to get me one.
He said I needed to train myself and my dragon, that using a glamour ring is a sign of weakness. ”
Nori looks appalled at that. “Were there other dragons to help you?”
I give her a sad smile. “No. I was the only dragon enrolled at the time. I had to take many classes by myself too. It was quite isolating at times. Besides, dragons are very rare. Different families have different types of dragons connected to different elements. My family line, the Beck line, is descended from white water dragons, and our relationship is with the ocean mainly, though we can control other types of water too. In our language, Beck means white. Hence my coloring. All the males of my line have white hair and light features as a sign of our lineage, but not all get chosen by a dragon.”
Nori bumps me lightly with her shoulder. “You’re special.”
At Nori’s words, my dragon spins in a circle, optimism flowing through him and spilling into scales along my torso and legs.
“I don’t always feel special,” I sigh out, causing some of the scales to disappear again.
“To me, you’ll always be.”
“And you to me.” I rest my head against Nori’s while I gather my strength to finish the story, knowing she needs the whole truth if she truly wants to understand why I am this way.
“So does your father go by Beck too?” Nori gently prods.
I lift my head and stare off at the glittering golden water, letting Nori and the ocean calm me with their combined presence.
“It’s also his family name, but not his first name.
I started going by Beck when I moved to the boarding school.
I didn’t want to be Shinsu there. It was too hard to remember my old life. ”
Tilting her head to the side, Nori asks, “So, if Beck means ‘white,’ does Shinsu also have a special meaning?”
I nod. “It does. ‘Shin’ means god. And ‘Su’ means water.”
“So your name literally means ‘god of water’? That’s so fitting. I’ve seen the way you love the ocean, and your connection with it. To me, Shinsu seems much more suitable for you than a name related to your coloring.”
My dragon agrees and gives me an “I told you so” look, undulating pearlescent scales along my limbs, much to Nori’s liking as her eyes eagerly track their movement.
I give her a quick kiss then square my shoulders, bracing myself for telling Nori about the ugliest stage of my life.
“After I graduated, I tried to go back home, but my parents told me they couldn’t risk having me around in their human neighborhood.
They bought me a boat and said it would be best to find a job where I could be useful considering my water magic and my dragon form. ”
Nori brings a hand up to cover her mouth. “Shinsu. That’s horrible.”
I swallow around the lump in my throat. “I thought I was alone before, but then I truly knew what it felt like to be completely abandoned.”
“I can’t fathom how hard that must’ve been. Did you move to Starry Hill then?”
Closing my eyes, I explain, “I spent two years working for an awful man as his personal protector. Sometimes he would ask me to shift for his delight. It made me resent my dragon for the longest time. It also didn’t help that my dragon was the reason I was taken away from you and life as I knew it. ”
When I open my eyes again, I see Nori’s are filled with angry tears, and I realize they’re on my behalf. “How did you get away?”
“Arran.”
“Vampire Arran?” Nori asks. “The shy recluse who’s also founder of Starry Hill?”
“Yeah. He doesn’t talk much about it, but he finds creatures in need around the world and offers them a safe place to live and work here in Starry Hill. He sent someone to find me too, and I packed my bags right then and there.”
“That’s incredible,” Nori says. “I never knew that about him.”
Finally, my mouth quirks into a smile as I get to a happier part again. “I’ve been living in Starry Hill for the last fourteen years, and my dragon and I have slowly started understanding each other and healing our relationship.”
Nori reaches up and brushes some strands off my forehead.
“It means so much to me that you’ve shared all of this with me.
Thank you, Shinsu. It’s a gift to know your whole past and I promise to do everything I can to keep your heart safe and make you feel as loved as you are. I’ll never abandon you.”
I lean into her touch. “You’ve helped me be proud of who I am. The way you’ve accepted my scales and my other dragon… attributes. Thank you. Thank you that I can be just as I am with you.”
Nori climbs into my lap and straddles me, lightly tracing the scales on my chest as she looks up at me with her pure honey eyes. “You’re so easy to love, Shinsu. I’m glad you’ve embraced who you are.”
Feeling encouraged and bold, I ask, “Do you want to meet my dragon?”
Nori’s head bobs up and down. “Yes, please. I’ve been wanting to meet him for months.”
I lift her carefully off me and stand up to start undressing. Nori watches me with rapt attention, her heart racing excitedly as I unbuckle my pants. She takes over undoing my buttons, her cheeks glowing red when I stand naked in front of her.
In my chest, my dragon struts up and down, very conscious of Nori’s gaze on us. He sends scales rippling over me as he gets ready to take over my body.
I press a quick kiss to Nori’s lips, then I jump, shifting midair as I dive into the welcoming water.