Chapter 40
CHAPTER FORTY
sierra
JANUARY, SENIOR YEAR
Iwrapped my arms around myself, hesitating to knock on the door of the address Keenan had texted me. This had to be the right place, the trees were practically shaking from the bass music blasting from inside the house.
Are you here?
Hayden
Yeah, are you?
I’m outside
I think?
Hayden
Hang on. I’ll be right there
Laughter erupted from inside, and I tapped my foot against the wooden deck.
This is dumb. I should just go.
I started to spin on my heel to turn around and go back to my car, but the door swung open before I could get to the steps.
“Hey, Skip.”
I had to bite my lip to hold back the giant smile that threatened to spread across my face. “Hi, Hayes.”
“Come on in.” He leaned against the frame of the entrance, propping the door open with his foot. “Welcome to Keenan’s humble abode. Er, well, his parents’ humble abode.”
If there weren’t so many people and the house was free of the stench of cheap booze and sweat, I was sure the place was pretty nice.
It appeared to have an open-concept living room and kitchen, with a hallway leading to what I assumed were bedrooms. But right now there were so many people packed inside that I had no idea how GCSO hadn’t been called to respond to a noise complaint yet.
Probably because it was far enough in the country that there weren’t many neighbors.
“Looks…cozy?” I quirked a brow as I tried to figure out what to say.
“Yeah, maybe when the entire town of Goldfinch isn’t packed in here like sardines in a can.” Hayden snorted as he took my hand. “Come on, the basement isn’t as bad.”
He led us to a closed wooden door across the house.
“You’re not going to murder me, right?” I teased. “Your dad’s a cop, you’d be the perfect person to do it if you were. You probably know a hundred different ways to dispose of a body.”
“I think if I was going to murder you, I would have done it by now, Skip,” he retorted, shaking his head with amusement. “Besides, there’s way too many witnesses right now for that.”
“Fair.” I laughed as he opened the door, revealing a set of carpeted stairs leading down to a basement. Colored lights illuminated the room below, and the chatter of more people drowned out the music filtering up the stairs.
“Over here.” Hayden waved me along as he headed over to a brown leather couch that looked like it had seen better days. He patted the cushion next to him, and I sat, sinking into it.
I gasped, wiggling my butt. “This is actually a really comfortable couch.” I wasn’t sure I’d be able to get up; the whole thing practically swallowed me whole.
Hayden chuckled. “Don’t judge a book by its cover. It’s well loved. Do you want something to drink?”
I shook my head. “No, I’m good, thanks.”
“All right.” He rested his arm on the back of the couch behind my shoulder, tapping the fabric with his hand.
The TV in front of us had Mario Kart queued up on the game console, and a few remote controllers were placed on the coffee table.
“Mario Kart?” I asked.
“Beerio Kart!” Keenan answered from behind. I flinched, jumping in my seat, and he leaned over the couch so his face was right next to mine. “Sorry, Skippy, didn’t mean to scare you. Hi, by the way. Glad you made it.”
“What’s Beerio Kart?” I asked.
Hayden rolled his eyes. “It’s a stupid game Keenan learned from these guys at SGU.”
“It’s drunk Mario Kart.” Keenan nodded with a wild grin on his face. “It’s so fun. You’ll never play regular Mario Kart ever again after playing this. You in, Skip?”
I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear. “Sure?”
“That’s the spirit! What do you want to drink? We’ve got beer, Twisted Tea, seltzer, and punch.”
Hayden leaned in to whisper in my ear, “You don’t want the punch.”
“I guess I’ll just take a Twisted Tea?” I wasn’t much of a drinker. I didn’t like the way my dad got when he drank, and my parents never had any good alcohol anyway. It was all too strong and bitter for my taste.
I’d had a Twisted Tea once after a rodeo when a bunch of us drove out on the backroads and got drunk.
Hayden was the only one sober by the end of the night so he drove us all home.
If underage drinking wasn’t breaking the law, then the amount of people we had packed in the cab and bed of the truck was. That was a fun night, though.
“Coming right up. Hazey?” Keenan pointed at Hayden as he started to head up the stairs.
“I’ll get something later. I wanna watch this.” He winked at me.
A few minutes later, Keenan came back down with a Twisted Tea and a Solo cup with some mixture that smelled like literal death.
I coughed, holding back a gag, when he thrust it under my nose. “What the hell is in this?”
He shrugged. “Bunch of stuff. Tito’s, some kind of tequila, Everclear”—he tilted his head like he was trying to recall what was in the concoction—“Malibu, pineapple juice, and a little bit of Sprite. It’s punch! Want some?”
I pushed the cup away, wrinkling my nose. “I’m good. I value my life tonight.”
“Your loss. It’s fun.” He sat down on the couch and handed me a controller, moving on from the topic like the conversation about the punch never happened.
“Okay, here’s how this works. It’s the same rules as regular Mario Kart but with a few additions.
Firstly, you have to finish your drink before you finish the race.
The whole thing. But you also can’t drink and drive.
So, you can’t be moving if you’re drinking.
First person to finish their drink and the race wins.
You don’t have to win the whole race and beat all the CPUs, by the way.
That won’t happen. You just have to beat me. ”
I blinked my eyes slowly, trying to comprehend this so-called fun game Keenan was trying to get me to play. “This sounds like a death trap.”
Hayden snorted. “It is for Keenan. That punch is dangerous.”
After choosing our characters—Yoshi for me, Bowser for Keenan—and our racecars, he handed me his remote. “You’re a beginner, so I’ll let you choose which racetrack we do.”
I selected Coconut Mall, and Keenan nodded his approval.
“I’m so glad you didn’t choose Rainbow Road. We’d never finish the race.”
I handed his controller back after starting the game. The countdown reached zero, and Keenan immediately started chugging his drink.
I cracked my can and took a small sip, grimacing at the taste.
Keenan glanced over at me between swigs of punch. “Come on, Skippy, you’re never gonna catch up to me like that.”
Hayden whispered in my ear, “Give it a few minutes and he won’t be paying attention to us. He won’t even be able to stay on the road in the game. Drink half of it, and I’ll drink the rest.”
“Isn’t that cheating?” I hissed, quiet enough that Keenan wouldn’t hear.
“I mean, it’s a stupid drinking game. Who cares if you cheat? It’s not like he’s going to ban you from his house. You’re my girl, you know?”
I pulled my lip between my teeth, my cheeks heating, and not from the alcohol.
Nodding, I did my best to drink half of the can then discreetly handed it to Hayden.
He finished the drink, save for a little sip.
He was right about Keenan. He wasn’t paying attention to anything, much less the road.
He’d been driving backward the last couple minutes.
Hayden handed me the can, and I drank the last bit of it before making a big show of crushing the can.
“I’m coming for you, Kee. Better get to driving!” I giggled, the small amount of alcohol already going to my head.
I passed by Keenan on the second lap after he ran into a wall. I leaned forward, sitting on the edge of the couch as I devoted all my focus to the race.
When I crossed the finish line, I let out a whoop of victory before jumping up off the couch. Hayden jumped up with me and wrapped his arms around me, lifting my feet off the ground.
“Damn, Skippy, you’re really good at this,” Keenan slurred, a drunken smile on his face. He wiggled his finger at me. “Giving me a run for my money.”
Hayden and I exchanged a knowing look then burst into laughter. I had to clutch my stomach from laughing so hard.
“So, I got into SGU.” A couple hours later after sobering up from Beerio Kart, Hayden—who was carrying a bright-red Solo cup with some kind of dark-brown liquid sloshing around in it—plopped down on the couch next to me, throwing his free arm over my shoulder and squeezing. “They want me on the rodeo team.”
I leaned into his side, resting my head on his shoulder. “I knew you were going to make it. They’d be fools not to have you on the team.”
He pressed his lips to my temple, murmuring into my hair, “I bet you’d make it, too, if you applied. You’re the best barrel racer I know.”
I sighed, slipping out from under his arm. This wasn’t the first time Hayden tried to talk me into applying to SGU, and I was certain it wouldn’t be the last, either. “I’m not going to SGU. I’m not going to any college, Hayes.”
Out-of-state schools were too expensive. The only school that wouldn’t put me in a massive pile of debt was SGU. A rodeo scholarship would have paid for my tuition, but staying in Goldfinch wasn’t an option, not with my father so close.
“You still have time, though. It’s still early and they’re on a rolling application, so they don’t have a deadline. You can get in. We don’t even have to live in the dorms. We can get an apartment together, and we—”
I stood, raising a hand to stop him. “I can’t, Hayden. You know I can’t.”
Getting an apartment with Hayden was even less of an option. The idea of my dad hurting him simply because I spent time with him was scary enough. Living together would increase the risk tenfold.
“I know. But I don’t know why.” He got up, too, forcing me to look up at him as he put his drink down and took my hands in his. He ran his thumbs over mine before lacing our fingers together. “I’d protect you, you know I would. You’d be safe with me.”
But you wouldn’t be safe with me. You’d just end up getting hurt.
I shook my head, squeezing my eyes shut to prevent the tears from spilling out. “Please don’t. Don’t do this. Not right now.”
“I just…” Emotion welled in his eyes as he whispered, “I love you, Sierra.”
I love you, too. That’s the problem.
I loved him too much to put him in danger, loved him too much to subject him to the inevitable pain that came from loving me.
“I know. I’m sorry.”