Chapter 25
CHAPTER 25
ATTICUS
The moment I spotted her, everything else had faded away.
The church was now packed with people as the organist played the Wedding March. But all I could focus on was Nicole, sitting five rows back to my left.
She wore a light pink dress that was off the shoulder on one side. Her hair fell down her back in loose, black tendrils. When had her hair gotten so long? She’d had it up in a ponytail earlier so I hadn’t noticed. It had only been a couple of months, but it felt like forever since I’d seen her. Stuck in the recording studio and missing her more than ever, it had been the longest two months of my life.
I couldn’t get over how damn gorgeous she looked in that dress. The shoulder that was bare had a small beauty mark that I’d always loved circling with my tongue. And she’d pinned a silk flower in her hair. She’d never looked more beautiful, and my chest ached with longing.
Ronan leaned in to whisper in my ear. “Hey, the bride’s over here, you know.”
I hadn’t even realized Emily was walking down the freaking aisle.
That’s not my bride. My bride is in the fifth row.
“You okay?” Ronan mouthed, seemingly amused.
I nodded and forced my eyes to where Tristan now faced his bride. I tried my best to pay attention to the ceremony. But it was damn hard not to look over at Nicole.
While I was so happy for my friends, my eyes inevitably wandered back to her as the ceremony continued. But she kept her gaze on the happy couple.
The priest started a sermon about the covenant of marriage, citing a verse from the Bible and talking about how marriage is a commitment through all seasons of life. I should’ve fought harder against the divorce when she filed . Yet despite all we’d been through, she was here. We’d be together today, and I couldn’t complain about that. I needed to trust that there was a reason for everything that had happened, and the man upstairs had it handled. At least I hoped he didn’t hate me enough to make me endure watching Nicole marry another man someday.
I glanced over at Ronan to find him smirking. He’d noticed me daydreaming again. I felt like the kid in class who’s constantly getting caught goofing off.
When the ceremony ended, I winked at Nicole as I passed her on my way down the aisle and out of the church. When she smiled, I felt my heart come alive. The last thing I wanted was to continue walking away from her, but alas, it was a procession that couldn’t exactly be stopped.
Once I made it to the exit, I hoped to wait for her there. But Kenzie and her team led the wedding party aside for a group photo outside the church. By the time that was finished, Nicole was nowhere to be found. I assumed she’d already left for the reception. I hoped she wasn’t skipping it altogether. She’d only said she was coming to the wedding...
When we got to the venue, the wedding party was kept from entering until the DJ was ready to formally announce us. To make matters worse, the wedding planner told me that after we made our grand entrance, the very first thing on the agenda was my best-man speech and toast.
At least I’d get it over with. I had it memorized for the most part but was still pretty nervous. Public performing was a cinch. But public speaking? That was uncharted territory for me. Especially with Nicole in the audience. If I so much as looked at her, I’d lose my damn train of thought.
When the time came for the grand entrance, each member of the wedding party was announced individually. Fucking Ronan decided to do a backflip after his name was called, which made the crowd go absolutely wild. Way to one-up my speech . It was likely dull as it was, but now it would be overshadowed by a circus act.
Just as we were seated at the head table, the wedding planner prompted me to stand.
My pulse raced as I made my way to the podium and tapped the mic, which didn’t seem to be on. “This thing working?”
As I spoke, the mic let out feedback like a high-pitched squeal.
Excellent way to start things off.
Tristan gave me a thumbs up.
I forced myself to start. “Hey, everyone. Thanks for being here today. For those of you who don’t know me, I’m Atticus Marchetti, one of Tristan’s best friends. I love him to death, but clearly he hates me for making me come up here and speak.”
Tristan blew me a kiss.
“I can perform in front of thousands, but for some reason, public speaking gets me. I’d rather grab some silverware and start drumming like an idiot right now. So bear with me.”
I took a deep breath. “Anyway, I hope you’ve been enjoying Tristan and Emily’s wedding thus far. I’m sure when most of you saw Emily walking down the aisle you thought…” I paused for effect. “What a beautiful flower girl. But where’s the bride?”
Laughter rang out.
“But alas, no, Emily was indeed the bride, marrying this lucky old fuck over here. There’s only fifteen years between them, which isn’t a big deal, right? I mean, when Emily was born, Tristan was in high school and shit.” I chuckled. “Nothing a little Viagra can’t help now, right, man?” Lifting my chin, I cracked, “Congratulations in advance on staying awake past nine PM tonight.”
Tristan gave me the finger, although he was laughing, as was Emily right alongside him.
“Anyway, age is just a number, right?” My eyes darted over to him. “Sort of like Tristan’s AARP membership.”
The audience seemed to really like that one, as the laughter was even louder this time. At least I wasn’t getting dead silence from them. The more they laughed, the more I felt myself relax.
“In all seriousness,” I said as the room faded to silence and I turned toward Tristan and Emily. “A love story like yours is something most people dream of. I’m sure some of those here don’t realize all of the obstacles you’ve overcome to get to where you are right now. I’d tell everyone the details, but no one has time for a scandal tonight…” I chuckled. “They’re hungry and want to start drinking.”
I exhaled, feeling a bit of relief, knowing this was about to come to an end. “All this ball busting to say, I’m so happy that the two of you found the loves of your lives.” My chest filled with regret and sadness as that sentence exited my mouth, and my speech lurched off on an unscripted trajectory. “Not everyone is lucky enough to be married to the person they love most in the world, and there’s no greater pain than knowing that person is out there without you. But you have inspired me to keep going, keep hoping, and to reprioritize what really matters.”
My eyes began to water. Fuck. I took a deep breath in, refusing to let a single tear fall. “At the end of our lives, it won’t be about how many albums we sold or the accolades we have. It will be about the people we got to love and the memories we have of them.” I raised my glass. “Please join me in raising a toast to Tristan and Emily, two of the best people I know.”
As everyone lifted their glasses, I snuck in one more jab. “By the way, Emily, the bartender is asking to see your ID, please, before you drink that...” I winked and stepped down from the podium.
The audience cheered, and I didn’t even return to my seat, wasting no time before going in search of Nicole. It felt like someone had taken my shackles off.
I walked around and scoped out each table. But she was nowhere to be found. A sinking feeling developed in the pit of my stomach.
She’s not here.