Chapter 9
CHAPTER NINE
Penelope had exciting news. Two pieces, in fact. And for that reason, she was smiling when she appeared before Dorian in his office.
“You look rather excited,” he said when he saw her standing there, noting the smile on her face.
“Oh, do I,” she offered with a casual shrug. “I thought this was how I always looked.”
He scoffed at the joke. “Put me out of my misery and tell me. There is clearly something on your mind.”
Indeed, there was. And that Penelope was so eager to share it with Dorian told how far they had come these past two weeks… even if it might not have been obvious to anyone who did not know them.
They worked closely together every day. Confined to Dorian’s office. Hours spent with just the two of them alone. Most of it was work, and Dorian appeared determined to keep that facade while refusing to speak about anything that might be deemed too personal.
For this, Penelope was glad, as she too wished for this relationship to remain surface level. She had not come here to rekindle her marriage, and still she believed it would be for the best that she left as soon as she was given what she came here for. Although…
It is no longer that simple. And as the days go on, I can’t help but wonder if Dorian is of the same mind. Unsure but curious…
“The first thing is this.” She lowered her eyelashes demurely, a faint smirk tugging at her lips. “I am pleased to announce that we are officially ready.”
“Ready?” Dorian frowned from behind his desk, leaning back and folding his hands on his lap. “What does that mean?”
“What do you think?” she said. “The preparations for the party are complete – at least as far as our roles are concerned. Everything has been organized and arraigned. All tasks have been delegated. And all there is left for us to do is sit back and congratulate ourselves as we wait for the big day. Or days, as it were.”
“Oh.” He blinked. “That is… good news. And a relief.”
He did not sound as if he meant it. In fact, Penelope knew the man well enough by now to see that something else was sitting on his mind.
Was that regret? Was he perhaps upset that they would no longer be spending every day together?
It might have sounded outlandish and even hopeful, but that was how it looked to her eyes.
And once again, the strangeness of their situation, how both seemed to realize it, was getting harder to ignore.
“As to the other thing.” She kept her happy facade front and center, not wanting to let him see that as he so clearly was, she too was feeling just a little down about the fact that their time together was so close to ending.
“As you know, the invitations were sent out last week – the real ones,” she added with a grin.
“Hopefully with no added letters attached.”
“Most have come back,” she continued, smiling with him. “And almost everyone has confirmed. But with that in mind, my cousin Albina wrote me this morning…” She had in her hand a letter, and she held it up so he could see it. “And she and her husband were wondering if they might come a day earlier.”
“Oh? Did they give a reason?”
She shrugged. “Implied but not stated. She says that you and her husband are good friends, and I think they wish to spend some time here before the guests arrive.”
Had she not known Dorian as she now did, Penelope would have assumed he would deny such a request as this. After all, was he not a loner? The type who spurned company whenever he could?
Not the truth, she now understood, just as she understood the true reason behind his isolation. Done for his sister, and no doubt he missed the chance to spend time with friends. Not that he would ever admit it.
“I don’t see why not,” he said simply.
“Wonderful,” she beamed.
She did not turn and leave. Although there were two reasons she had come to see Dorian, there was a third question that had been hovering on the edges of her mind now for some days. The party planning was over. This weekend would see the estate play host to a score of guests. And once it did…
Her husband had made her a promise, and Penelope doubted that he would deny that promise when the time came. But they had not spoken about it for a full week, and she felt the desire to double check if for no other reason than she needed to hear it said.
“Is there something else?” he asked as she lingered.
She grimaced. “I do not want it to sound as if I am doubting you – or I do not trust you…”
“Always a good way to start a conversation.”
She laughed awkwardly. “Once this party is hosted… by this time next week, it will be over, and there will be no need for me to remain here. And I just wanted to confirm that you and I… that the deal we made… that…”
Penelope felt her heart beating against her chest. As it did, a warmth spread through her body, and her limbs began to tingle. And despite her best efforts, her eyes found their way to the duke’s lips, lingering on them for far too long, an effect which saw her breath catch.
When Penelope had first come up with her plan, it felt like a simple thing. A business transaction, a favor offered, one given in return. Nothing more, nothing less.
But so much had changed since then.
Penelope’s feelings for her husband had shifted considerably.
Once, she had felt nothing for him, total apathy as was the only way she had been able to survive.
But getting to know him better, spending so much time with him, and she was starting to see him as more than the man who abandoned her.
Dammit, she was starting to see him as her husband.
And not just her husband, but as a man. His broad shoulders.
His thick arms and burly chest. His messy black hair, full lips, deep eyes that smiled now far more than they once did.
She could not say whether she liked him as many wives did their husbands, but she knew she felt attraction toward him.
Which was infinitely worse, in her opinion.
“I remember the deal,” Dorian said, clearing his throat as he did. “And assuming nothing changes and all goes as planned, I don’t see why I will renege on our agreement.”
“Good,” she said a little too loudly. “That is… I just wanted to make sure.” And then, she laughed awkwardly.
Dorian said nothing at first.
Sitting behind his desk, leaning back, he wore the slightest of smirks as his eyes roamed her.
She tried to stand tall, acting aloof, but she felt her body shake and her limbs tingle as those eyes drank her in.
They paused on her waist, on her chest, and then on her lips.
And his eyes flashed quickly, the meaning behind which felt a little too obvious.
The tension in the room grew as the silence settled.
Penelope found herself licking her lips.
Dorian’s smile widened, his eyes flashed again, then they held her in their unwavering stare, the sense that he was daring her to ask the question. That being, was she capable of doing such a thing as sleeping with him when the time came. How much did she really want that child…
“If that is all?” Dorian said finally, breaking the silence.
“Y – yes,” she stammered loudly, gasping to feel the tension break. “That is all.”
“Wonderful. Write to your cousin and let me know when they plan on arriving.”
“I will.”
“Good.” He looked at her, raising an eyebrow as she stared back blankly.
“Yes. Good. I will…” She gave her head a shake, feeling foolish – feeling like he could read her mind. “I will go.” And that was what she did.
She stumbled into the hallway, her breathing heavy, her body so hot that she was sweating.
For two weeks they had managed to work together, able to avoid the elephant that sat big and awkward in the room between them.
Maybe they both just assumed something would give before the time arrived? Maybe they had hoped it would?
Clearly, as things stood, both knew well that this deal of theirs would be fulfilled, just as both knew what that would mean.
I want a child. And Dorian is the only one who can give it to me. And that is all I want. I am not doing it because… it is not for… he knows why!
Penelope hurried through the house, her mind turning with anxiety.
When she and Dorian were little more than strangers, things were simple, and that was how she liked it.
Now she had no choice but to question if perhaps she was wrong to grow this close to him.
Would it be easier if she kept her distance from now on? Surely it would be.
And for a brief second, she thought to do just that.
Then again… did she even want to keep her distance? Did she want it to be an emotionless transaction so that once they were done, she could go home and forget about the duke once and for all? If only she knew.
Whatever she decided, it would come to define not just their marriage but their entire future. A future together, or one apart? That was the question to which Penelope could not fathom an answer.