Chapter 5
“Do not give me that look,” Marcus snapped at Honoria as he strode from his office.
“Look? What look?” Honoria said, feigning ignorance. “This is my face. It always looks this way.”
“You know the one.” He stepped through the door and then turned back on her, sure to fix his sister in a scowl. “That smug look of triumph that you wear as if you have won some great victory.”
“I wear no such look,” she said simply. “Whatever it is that you see on my face is on account of your own misgivings.” She looked at him plainly… only for a wicked grin to spread across her lips. “Whoops.”
“Say it,” he said. “Say it now so we might be done with it once and for all.”
“Say what?” She frowned and rubbed her chin. “I have no idea what –”
“Say it, Honoria,” he growled. “Or leave. It is your choice.”
As was to be expected, Marcus’ mood had taken a turn for the worse. And as was to be further expected, he doubted that would change any time soon.
I am trying to see the positive in this… I want to embrace what is undoubtedly a positive outcome… I wish to be thrilled! Damn pleased with how things have turned out. I know I should be.
Marcus had spent all last evening and much of this morning attempting to force this notion into his subconscious.
After all, was this not exactly what he wanted…
and if not wanted, needed? He was not father material, his adopted son needed a mother to raise him, and thanks to a rather bizarre and unavoidable situation, he had just that.
What was more, Marcus was forced to admit that as far as potential wives went, Lady Lucy Whitcombe was not nearly as bad as she could have been.
Yes, she was stubborn. Yes, she was argumentative and headstrong. And yes, she was sure to make a fuss about every little thing, if for no other reason than to prove her independence and remind him that she had been forced into this. Whatever this marriage promised to be, it would not be easy.
It was strange to admit that Marcus liked these things about her too.
He still could not scrub his first impression of her from his mind.
When she had stepped from the carriage, capturing his gaze as if a hand had reached out and forced his eyes upon her.
It was her confidence that he was drawn to, the fact that she would not be cowered by a situation beyond her control.
She is different to every other woman I know. Whether that is a good thing or not… I suppose time will tell.
“Might I ask where you are going in such a rush?” Honoria asked with a fluttering of her eyelashes.
He glared daggers at his sister. “You know exactly where I am going.” Still, she looked at him expectantly. He groaned. “I need to procure a marriage license at once. If this marriage is to go unnoticed and then become forgotten, it needs to happen quickly. And without incident.”
“Ah yes, the marriage,” Honoria said as if she had forgotten. “That most interesting of circumstances that nobody could have seen coming. Yourself especially…” She flashed her eyes. “Remind me, were you not telling me just last week how loath you were to ever find a wife?”
“I do not wish to talk about it.” Marcus turned and strode down the hallway.
“I jest, Brother!” Honoria called as she hurried after him. “Merely a jest.”
“Tell me when I am meant to laugh.”
“I know you are upset,” she said as she fell in beside him. “I know you want everyone to believe that you despise what has happened. But surely, even one as stubborn as you, can see this for the good that it is.”
“I see it for exactly what it is,” he snapped. “Necessary.”
“Which is why it is such a good thing that it has happened!” Honoria stepped around him and cut him off. Then she put her hands on her hips and looked up at him. “You needed this to happen, Marcus. James needed this to happen.”
Marcus winced at the name.
“I will not mock you. I will not make fun – I want this to work. Which is why I must say it, before it is too late.”
“Say what?”
“I do not know this Lady Whitcombe. I do not know what she wants or what you told her –”
“You know what I told her.”
Oh yes, what a fun conversation that was…
He could still picture clearly the look of abject surprise and horror on her face when he told her of the child. And while she had agreed that she would help raise it, for what other choice did she have, it was not something she looked pleased about.
Would she make a good mother? Would she even try? As in all things, time would tell.
“I know what you said you told her,” she corrected.
“I know what she has been told to expect, regarding the child. But what I do not know, nor do you for that matter, is what she expects from this marriage. She is not a nanny. She is not a governess. She is to be your wife, and like it or not, that means something.”
“As I explained already to both you and her,” Marcus felt his jaw tighten, “this is to be a marriage of convenience only. Yes, she is to help where James is concerned – that is her chief role. Outside of that, I want nothing from her. As she wants nothing from me.”
“That is all well and good,” Honoria agreed. “But will you think on what that means? Once you two marry, it will be expected that the two of you act as man and wife.”
Marcus leaned back. “If you are suggesting that she and I… I will not force her into bed with me. I do not want such a thing.”
And that was the truth. Marcus had been honest with Lady Whitcombe when he told her what was expected, just as he was honest with himself when he thought on what he expected too.
Despite Lady Whitcombe’s beauty, Marcus did not envision a world where the two of them grew into this marriage.
He did not foresee love blooming between them.
In his eyes, marriage was not about love and romance.
It was a business, as had been the way with his parents.
A colder relationship did not exist than that which he had witnessed as a child, and he wanted nothing of the sort.
Better to pretend that they were not married… to do as promised and leave it at that.
Honoria rolled her eyes. “What the two of you do in this home is your business. My meaning is, there will be times when both of you are expected to be seen in public.” She cocked her eyebrow at him.
“And how will it look if you can hardly stand to be around one another? If you are little better than strangers?”
“I…” Marcus hesitated. “I did not consider that…”
“This might be a marriage of convenience, but it needs to be companionable also. Otherwise, people will talk, and such a thing as that will not reflect well on you. Or James, for that matter.”
Marcus winced as the truth of this statement settled upon his shoulders. And a most heavy truth it was.
With how quickly this had all happened, he had not considered the long-term effects of this marriage. So concerned was Marcus about James that he did not imagine this marriage beyond the child’s care and well-being.
Honoria is right. If we are to make this work, to fool the ton, we will need to at the very least get along. Whatever that might look like. If such a thing is even possible.
“You are right,” he groaned and rubbed his eyes. “I… I did not think of that.”
“Which is why you have me.”
“I will speak to Lady Whitcombe,” he concluded. “I will explain to her that…” He laughed bitterly. “That she must try not to hate me.”
“Not as easy to do as you might imagine.”
Marcus was in over his head, and he knew it. It was one thing to force this marriage so that James would have someone to care for him. But it was another entirely to consider the larger implications, the very real fact that Lady Whitcombe was going to be in his life from this day until his last.
And all the while, that initial image of her climbing from the carriage battered at his subconscious for reasons he refused to consider.
“Is there anything else?” he asked.
“One more thing…” Honoria turned and looked down the hallway. There, a doorway stood open, and inside the soft cries of the baby could be heard. “How long has it been since you’ve seen him?”
Marcus winced. “Not that long.”
“Meaning?”
His stomach seized with sudden guilt.
Marcus wanted to do right by the baby. That was how he had gotten into this mess in the first place! However, it had become painfully clear to him recently that he knew as much about child rearing as he did about… about sprouting wings and using them to fly.
Worse still, he was beginning to suspect that the baby hated him. Whenever he tried to help, whenever he held him or was near, the baby burst into tears as if the mere sight of Marcus terrified him to his core.
How was he to do right by the child, and by his friend, if he could not even be in the same room? How could he do any of this? What was he thinking?
“James is being looked after.” He strode past his sister and, as he came closer to the doorway, he dared a quick glance inside. There, a maid sat, James rested on her lap, perfectly at ease and happier without him.
“He needs more than a mother!” Honoria called. “He needs a father too!”
“One problem at a time!”
So much had changed in Marcus’ life of late, and still, those changes continued to pile up.
Today, he would visit London and begin the process of procuring a marriage license.
In two weeks, he hoped, he would wed Lady Whitcombe once and for all.
After that, he would be married, his life would never be the same. And then…
If only I knew. If only I could guess. As hard as things have been lately, they are only set to become harder. I am marrying Lady Whitcombe to make things easier on me, but I sense the opposite will be true.
And all the while, he could not scrub that initial image of his future wife from his mind…