Chapter 10 #2
“This is your home; you should not worry about judgment here,” Tobias said gently as he knelt down in front of her. “If you wish to wear trousers, then you are welcome to do so. And if any of the servants says anything to you, I shall speak to them.”
“But I don’t want anyone to get into trouble.” Her eyes widened, and she clenched her fists. “It takes people time to get used to me, and that’s all right. I know I’m odd. I try not to be too much at once.”
“If anyone ever makes you feel like you are too much, they are not worth your time.” Protectiveness surged through Tobias as he looked at her. “You are perfect just the way you are.”
“But I am not proper.” Georgia shrugged.
“I don’t really fit. Sometimes trousers feel right, and sometimes dresses feel right, and when I was younger, people sometimes called me George, and that felt good, and sometimes it didn’t.
But then everyone got confused, so I thought Georgie would be better. ”
“Propriety is important, but it is not everything. And what is considered proper changes. What matters more is whether you are a good person. And from what I have heard and seen, you are.” Tobias ran a hand through his hair, choosing his next words carefully.
“And though it is kind of you to make things less confusing for people around you, I do not want to call you anything that does not feel like you. If you want me to call you George, I will.”
Georgia appeared to mull this over and shook her head. “Georgie feels like me all the time. I like it. Georgie is good on trouser days and dress days.”
“Then I will call you Georgie.” Tobias smiled. “Now, tell me, where did you learn to fence?” He straightened and rolled his shoulders back.
“Alistair taught me. Or at least, he tried. He is not the best teacher.” Georgia—no, Georgie let out an exasperated sigh. “It’s not his fault, though.”
Tobias perched on the edge of his desk. “But you have not had lessons yourself?”
“No. Alistair’s tutor didn’t approve.” Georgie looked crestfallen.
Tobias nodded, tapping a finger on his lips. “Then we shall have to find one who does.”
Georgie’s eyes widened, and she clapped a hand over her mouth. “Do you mean I can have lessons? Real lessons?”
“Of course.” Tobias smiled. “As soon as I find you a good teacher, you shall start your lessons. Though you will need a chaperone.”
“Thank you!” Georgie climbed onto the desk and gave him a hug. “And when I have lessons, we can do this again, and I’ll wear trousers, and then I will win!”
“You can certainly try.” Tobias relaxed as she released him from her hug.
“I will do more than try. I’m going to beat you—just you wait.” She grinned at him. “Maybe I can be like La Maupin, although I am not a very good singer. But maybe I could learn. Anyway, I could be as good a fencer as her, and I could fight ten men and go on all sorts of adventures.”
As Georgie launched into a tale about the infamous Mademoiselle Maupin, Tobias listened attentively. He watched as her face lit up with each little anecdote and felt a warmth spread through him.
The scent of violets wafted into the study, and he looked away from Georgie to find Rowen standing in the doorway. The shadow across her face made her expression hard to read.
“I think it is best if you let the Duke get back to his work, darling,” Rowen called.
“It is no trouble; I welcome the distraction.” Tobias stood and adjusted the lapels of his jacket without thinking.
Rowen arched an eyebrow at him before turning to her daughter. “Be that as it may, you need to study. I know you still have some work to do on your arithmetic.”
Georgie looked from her mother to Tobias. “But—”
“No buts,” Rowen cut her off. “Go on, or else Alistair will be finished, and then you will be stuck indoors by yourself.” She gestured to the door, and Georgia jumped off the desk and darted out of the room. “And do not think to simply copy his work, or you will be in serious trouble!”
Rowen turned to Tobias as her daughter’s footsteps faded away, and the tension in her shoulders did not escape his notice.
“I am sorry if she kept you from anything important. I will make sure it does not happen again.” She gestured to the open ledger on his desk.
“You do not need to do that. In truth, it was a welcome distraction.” Tobias grimaced at the book behind him. “She is a delightful child. I learned rather a lot about La Maupin.”
“If you get her started, she will not stop.” Rowen bit her lip, an unreadable expression flitting across her face. “And though I am grateful for the kindness you’ve shown her, I promised you that I would be useful to you, so I will make sure you are not disturbed when you have work to do.”
“You do not have to.” Tobias waved a dismissive hand.
Rowen shook her head and gave him a frank look.
“This situation is only temporary, Tobias, and I will make sure that there is as little disruption to our lives as possible. The more tangled our routines get, the more difficult it will be to keep our lives separate. My children need consistency, structure, and routine. They have been through enough uncertainty already.”
Tobias swallowed, his brow furrowed as some sharp emotion he could not name welled within him.
“I have no wish to add to that uncertainty. I said I would have a hand in their education, and I meant that. This means we will spend time with one another, especially Alistair and me. Our private lessons will start tomorrow, after all.”
“I know.” Rowen rubbed her temple. “I just… You and I know what our agreement was. We understand it. I simply ask that you remember that when you deal with my children.”
“Unless, of course, you choose to remain.”
Tobias had meant the remark to sound teasing, to unsettle her and make her blush in that delightful way, to defuse the tension in the room, but his words came out more sincere.
“You and I both know that will never happen,” Rowen replied flatly. “So do not make it harder on my children than it needs to be.”
“I will not.” Tobias put a hand over his heart. “I swear it.”
“Good.” Rowen nodded and left the room.
The scent of violets lingered long after she had disappeared, and Tobias found his eyes drifting to the doorway.
This is not permanent.
He knew that, and he did not want it to be permanent. Why would he want to invite the chaos of a family into his life forever?
“That is not the life for me.” His eyes flicked to his brother’s portrait, and he felt the numbness return. “We will go our separate ways, but I would be shirking my duty if I did not take an active role in the children’s lives.”
His eyes drifted back to the door, the scent of violets filling his nose.
“I do not want them to be ill-equipped to handle their titles and roles. I have to ensure they are ready. That’s all. Besides, Rowen is the one who suggested we be cordial, and surely that extends to her children?”
He looked back at his brother’s portrait and sighed. “Who would have thought that having a wife would be so complicated?”