Chapter 26 #2
Steadying her nerves, Helena continued the flight down the stairs. She needed to finish the tasks for her sister’s wedding to Matteo.
“I think the first bonnet goes better with the gown.”
Grace walked around her older sister, Chastity, appraising her attire. She, Faith, and Helena stood around Chastity’s bedchambers as they watched Sally put her wedding attire together.
“What do you think, Chastity?” Grace asked her sister. “Which one do you prefer?”
Chastity, who stood in front of the full-length mirror donning her wedding gown and the second of the bonnets she tried, shrugged her shoulders.
“They both look fine to me,” she said simply.
“What about the gloves, m’lady?” Sally asked.
She went to Chastity bringing forward two pairs of gloves for her to choose from.
Another shrug of the shoulders.
“You choose for me, Sally. I shall wear whichever you recommend.”
The lady’s maid looked at Helena for help.
“Perhaps the satin ones? The shade works better with the gown, I think.” Helena said, forcing a smile.
She stood up and went to Sally. Choosing the satin gloves, she put them on Chastity.
“There, what do you think?” Helena asked, speaking more cheerfully than she really felt.
Indeed, Helena could perceive that everyone in the room seemed to be putting much effort in projecting a cheerfulness that they did not really feel. Everyone except Chastity.
The past three days had still not allowed them to become accustomed to Chastity’s recently acquiescent ways.
When she had told Helena that she would do anything she said, Helena had not quite expected that her sister meant it all so literally.
Indeed, anything that required a decision, Chastity deferred to Helena’s choice.
Helena was starting to become unnerved by her actions.
How long was her sister to become this meek, opinionless young woman?
She honestly did not know if this was better than when she refused to speak to any of them at all.
“Whatever Helena says, Sally,” Chastity said, unsurprisingly.
Helena hid her sigh.
They only had a few more days now to prepare for Chastity’s wedding. And despite everyone putting up some kind of front, Helena could feel that not one of her sisters, not even Chastity, wanted this wedding to take place.
Matteo.
For him to do this, for him to sacrifice his freedom to save them from ruin, was both relief and pain to her.
And it was the thought of it that served as her anchor in this stormy sea that she found herself in.
She wished she could show him, tell him how much his saving Chastity’s reputation meant to her and her family.
She wished she could, but alas, to be sure, they must never have conversations of the heart.
Matteo was constantly on her mind, though she tried her best to replace his image with something—anything else, somehow, he always found a way back into her mind, into her consciousness.
“Aye, these gloves then, m’lady,” Sally confirmed, looking at Helena.
Helena nodded, suddenly feeling overwhelmed.
“Allow me to assist you in changing back into your other gown, m’lady,” Sally said to Chastity, who at once allowed the lady’s maid access to the buttons at the back.
“Come, let us leave Chastity in peace,” Helena said as she ushered her two youngest sisters out of the bedchamber.
The knock on Helena’s door surprised her. It was nearly half past one, and although she was still awake, she had not expected any other member of the household to be awake too.
“Helena?”
It was Chastity’s voice from behind the door. Quickly rising from the bed, she lit a candle and opened the door.
“Chastity, what are you still doing up?”
“May I come in?”
“Of course, dearest,” Helena said sincerely. “You know that you are always welcome.”
Chastity entered the room, and Helena noticed that she did not bring a candle to light her way.
“Where is your candle?”
“I do not need one. I know the way to your room better than any other room in the house.”
Helena bit back a sob. It was true, Helena realized as she watched Chastity walk to the fireplace.
“Thunderstorms, bad dreams, gossip—any small reason, really, that was all I needed to go to you. You have always been my refuge, Helena. And I—I have been an ungrateful wretch!”
Chastity’s tears flowed freely and readily from her eyes, attesting to how long she had been holding them back.
And as always, Helena rushed to her and wrapped her sister in her arms.
“Hush now, dearest,” Helena tried to soothe her. “It shall be alright.”
“How?” Chastity said in a broken voice. “I have ruined everything for myself, for you.”
“Do not say that.”
“It is but the truth. For once, do not protect me, even from myself, Helena,” Chastity pleaded. “I know what I have done and what I have caused to happen. I am sorry, Helena, so very sorry.”
Helena could form no words, cold offer no relief to Chastity’s pain. For her own pain was already too much to bear. Instead, she tightened her arms around her sister and cried with her.
When they had somewhat quieted down, she led Chastity to her bed. And as it was when they were younger, she cradled her sister in her arms until they both fell asleep.