Chapter 29
29
He’d done it – he’d created my new favourite memory.
We were lying on a picnic blanket he’d brought, our bellies full of the homemade scones, strawberry jam and clotted cream his personal chef had prepared. And our Londons were beginning to blur …
‘This can’t be real,’ I murmured.
‘What can’t be real?’
‘You. Us. Those perfect scones.’
He chuckled, and the sound was like music to my ears. ‘What do you mean?’
‘Maybe you’re used to living in a fairy tale, but I’m not.’
Karim turned towards me and set his head on his fist. ‘Actually, neither am I. I’m just good at making my life look like a fairy tale. But it’s something completely different to really feel it. You’re showing me that.’
‘I wish we could stay out here forever,’ I said with a lazy sigh, ‘but I need to get going. I’ve got homework due in tomorrow. Urgh, I’m not looking forward to going into school.’
‘Tell me about it,’ he said with a grimace, as he lay down again. ‘It’s been a weird start to the school year.’
I’d seen clips of St Victor’s School in his vlogs. It was sleek, grand and equipped with all the latest technology. I imagined him walking around the pristine corridors, being treated like royalty by all his classmates, getting taught by some of the best teachers in the world.
‘Oh yeah?’ I said through a smirk. ‘It must be so horrible to study at the most prestigious and sought-after school in the country! Too many people vying to be at your beck and call? Too many state-of-the-art facilities to choose from that it makes your head spin?’
He nudged me a little, the corner of his mouth lifting. ‘Knock it off.’
‘Do you think you’d notice me if we went to the same school?’
There was so much I was asking here … whether he could sense that I was unpopular, whether he would still notice me if I was surrounded by numerous gorgeous and sophisticated girls, whether I was attractive enough for him to want me despite all the other options.
‘I don’t know,’ he answered. Although it hurt a little, I was glad he was being honest. ‘But I do know that I’m very grateful we met, that you put me in my place so damn well in our first conversation.’
I burst out laughing, and all of a sudden there was no more hurt.
‘I really needed that,’ he said simply. ‘I really needed you .’
His eyes found mine and I held his gaze, didn’t flinch away from the intensity of how it felt, the things it did to my heart.
‘I like to think that we’d always have found our way to each other,’ I whispered.
He reached for my hand. ‘Then let’s just think that.’
‘You slow-danced with Karim Malik in Hyde Park?’ Saliha squealed.
Sighing dreamily, I drew my curtains to give us some much-needed privacy because Sal was now leaping around my room so enthusiastically that her scarf was barely hanging on to her head.
As I did so, I spotted Imran sitting at his desk, chewing the end of his pen, deep in thought.
Our eyes locked.
My breath caught in my throat.
I felt my cheeks warm.
He’d messaged me on Snapchat a few times since that mess during lunch, but I hadn’t responded. His messages were surprisingly kind and thoughtful, but I didn’t like the way he left my nerves in a jumble. My emotions felt so out of my control around him, so I’d decided to limit our interactions, starting by ignoring him and skipping out on our revision sessions.
A subtle smile lifted his lips as he ran a hand over his beard.
How could I find such a simple gesture so damn charming?! What was wrong with me?
He attempted to mouth something to me, but I swept the curtain between us. I felt a little guilty about brushing him off like that, but this wasn’t the time to think about Imran Sayyid. This was the time to gush about how it felt to literally get swept off my feet by Karim Malik .
‘Oh my God, he’s such a gentleman!’ I exclaimed. ‘He held and twirled and lifted me so perfectly .’
Sal pretended to pass out on my bed, and I giggled as I joined her.
‘This is exactly how me and Karim were lying on his picnic blanket approximately an hour ago.’
Saliha’s eyes widened until I thought they’d pop right out. ‘No one from school would believe this unless they saw the cold, hard evidence.’ She waved her phone at me, where I’d sent her the selfies.
‘We only took those for memories,’ I said. ‘Please don’t show anyone.’
She sat up and crossed her legs. ‘You know I’d never. The thought of your photo getting into the wrong hands is enough to give even me a panic attack. Your parents would completely lose their shit.’
‘Don’t even go there.’
‘Holy cow! When did you go from being boring ol’ Zara to actually having a life? I didn’t think I’d ever see the day.’
I pulled a silly face and we laughed, but then her expression clouded and looked strangely … off.
‘What is it?’ I pressed.
‘You haven’t been keeping up with Mr Ex, have you? There’s a lot that’s going down in Karim’s personal life right now.’
‘What do you mean?’
I only half-wanted to know. I could tell Sal was about to bring me back to reality.
‘Chloe was caught getting it on with Sanjay mere days after the abortion news was leaked. Then they attended London Fashion Week as a couple. If anything, I thought Karim would be a heartbroken mess right now, not … What I’m saying is, The Exes just seem so twisted.’
Irritation prickled across my face.
‘Karim isn’t twisted like the others. He’s different,’ I replied defensively. ‘You should know, you’re the one who’s been obsessed with him for ages.’
‘Zara, I don’t see how that’s possible. That’s his social circle, has been for years . I just don’t want it to be a case that you’re a rebound. Or a distraction. What if he’s speaking to about five other girls too right now?’
I shook my head. ‘It’s different between us. I know it is.’
‘This is Karim Malik we’re talking about! Whenever he wasn’t with Chloe Clark, he was a total player.’
That had done it – the seed of doubt was planted.
Perhaps it had already been there, because all of this was far too good to be true, anything exciting in my life usually was. Saliha’s words had simply given my insecurities a face and then thrust them into the light.
She was only being protective, but I still felt some resentment kick in. I hadn’t wanted my little bubble of bliss to pop so soon. But if the roles were reversed, I’d have warned her of the same things. Probably much sooner.
Sal gave me a worried look. ‘These people look good on camera, but the truth is we have no idea what they’re really like. I just don’t want you getting hurt. Please be careful.’
‘You’re right. About everything. I promise to be careful.’
‘Did anything happen between you guys?’
I cocked a brow. ‘I told you everything that happened. You know I’d tell you straight away if I had my first kiss.’
An unexpected image fell into my mind – Imran Sayyid wrapping his hands around my waist, pulling me close so our bodies pressed together, lowering his head until his lips met mine …
I’d fantasized about this a thousand times – having my first kiss with the first boy I’d ever desired, the very one that had awoken feelings of lust within me, and the thought of kissing him always left my heart pounding, my head rushing. But this was a secret, forbidden thought that I’d never even share with Sal, that I’d never admit aloud to anyone .
‘Zara?’ My attention snapped right back to Sal, who was still looking concerned. ‘This has all happened so quickly. I guess I’m worried about you … changing.’
‘Boys will come and go but you will always be my best friend,’ I promised.
‘Good,’ she said fiercely, giving me a bear hug.
‘By the way,’ I said as we came apart, ‘Karim wants to show me a glimpse of his world too, and I’m nervous.’
Although Karim remained disguised whenever we met, it was still such a risk. There were so many people out there interested in his love life and all it would take was one snap of us together for my life to crumble before my eyes.
‘Obviously you’ll have to be cautious – Mr Ex lives in that world. And so do some of the bitchiest, wealthiest influencers in the country. You’ve got to watch your back.’
I exhaled. ‘I know. I’ve told Karim I don’t want to risk being seen with him, and he’s being careful. No one has spotted us so far, but I’m just worried about how he plans to pull off taking me to one of his events while keeping my identity anonymous. And how on earth am I supposed to socialize and fit in with all those famous influencers?’
‘Never feel pressured into doing anything. Just remember you can always say no, even to the iconic Karim Malik,’ Sal said reassuringly, and I nodded. ‘Also, why did you skip out on yesterday’s study session?’
I paused awkwardly for a second. ‘I just thought I’d be more productive alone. More focused.’
Sal rolled her eyes. ‘Was it because of Imran?’
‘Not at all,’ I replied too quickly. Who was I kidding? It was impossible to lie to Sal. ‘OK, fine. Maybe a little.’
She gave me a knowing look. ‘There’s definitely something there between you guys, isn’t there?’
‘Hell no! Why would you think that? There is something between me and Karim though.’ When I looked at her, she had a wide Cheshire grin on her face. ‘What is it now?’
‘Well, well, well. From having nothing going on with any guy, to having two of the hottest guys ever chasing you? You’re my inspiration, boring ol’ Zara!’ She laughed loudly as I covered my face with my hands. ‘Imagine how cool it would be if you actually did have your first kiss with Karim Malik!’
‘Oh my God, you’re being so hot and cold about him! But yeah, I know. Argh!’
And then we were squealing and giggling again.
I blasted my summer playlist, and we danced around my room wildly, singing along at the top of our lungs.