Chapter 11
I officially both love and hate New York City.
I love that there are endless things to do.
I love the hustle and bustle of the culture.
I love how when you turn a corner, there’s something interesting to see.
What I do not love is the smell of exhaust and rotting trash—and all of the people. So many people.
I’m a small-town girl used to fresh air, and this huge city is just crazy-packed full of people.
You walk down the street and you’re surrounded by people.
You go into a restaurant—same thing. Go into a store—more people.
I was eager to see the New York City subway system, but as soon as we got underground, I turned Fallon around and walked us right back out the way we came.
Crowds of bodies packed like sardines in small, confined spaces is a huge no for me.
I’ve concluded that New York City is like an ant colony.
Thousands upon thousands of little ants all bumping into each other but still getting their jobs done.
This morning, Fallon took me sightseeing.
In Times Square, I got to jam with a street band and learned how to play the steel drum.
I met the infamous NYC Elmo—well, one of them.
Yeah, he was really creepy. Fallon and I got our portraits painted by a street vendor.
Our heads are five sizes too big, but I love them and plan to frame them when I get home.
We went to see Freedom Tower and I think we were both overwhelmed with the intensity of the experience.
We made a quick stop back at the hotel for warmer clothes after Fallon made the suggestion of spending the rest of the afternoon getting lost in Central Park.
So here we are, in this enormous oasis in the middle of the largest city in the country.
The day is overcast and cold enough that you can see the cloud of your breath when you exhale.
I love the feel of the cold, crisp air as it tingles with a slight burn when it fills my lungs.
It’s not uncommon to get snow in New York in November.
I wonder if we’ll see it snow before we leave for Iceland tomorrow.
I know we’ll definitely see snow in Reykjavik.
Fallon and I are strolling along Gapstow Bridge in Central Park, debating whether or not we have enough energy to visit the MoMA, when it hits me.
I mean, really, truly hits me like a punch to the gut.
I’m going to freaking Iceland tomorrow! I’ll be going to London and Paris and Venice and all those other places.
I have never left the country before and I’m actually very excited about our trip.
My fritzed-out brain decides it’s time for a happy dance.
Like a for real, hands-waving-around-in-the-air happy dance right there in the middle of the bridge.
Fallon looks over at me with curious amusement. “Do you need to pee?”
“No! This is me being happy. I can’t wait to see the world!” I twirl in a circle and shout, “Fallon Montgomery is giving me the world!”
Fallon doesn’t smile much, but when he does, it’s breathtaking. His head throws back, and he releases a loud howl of laughter. Then, he grabs me, picks me up, and spins me in circles until I’m dizzy.
“You are so crazy,” he opines, putting me back down on my feet as passers-by give us bemused looks.
When we start walking again, he reaches down and grabs my gloved hand, linking our fingers. Shocked by the gesture, I about fall on my face when I trip over my two left feet. Luckily, Fallon is able to steady me, because—oh yeah—he’s holding my hand! I decide to just go with it.
“Hey, want to go try out ice skating at Bryant Park?” he asks. Pointing to a small ice rink we can see from the bridge, he says, “The Wollman rink looks pretty packed right now.”
“Me on ice skates? I’m more Bambi the deer than Michelle Kwan.”
Fallon playfully shoulder-bumps me. “Come on, it’ll be fun. We can take one of those horse-driven carriages too.”
“You can’t tease me when I fall flat on my butt.”
“Who me?”
I shove him sideways, and he pulls my braided ponytail, then steals my winter hat, holding it over my head. I jump up, trying to take it back, but he just holds it higher.
“Fallon.”
“Elizabeth.” That stinking smirk is back in its usual place on his face.
Game on. I spider-monkey myself on his back, and I have to hold on for dear life when he takes off running. Fallon slows down and pops me up higher on his back, folding his hands under me to keep me in place.
I rest my chin on his shoulder. “My own personal NYC tuk-tuk.”
I’m starting to slip down his back, so he bumps me up higher again. “You’re much heavier than you look.”
I smack the top of his head and he starts laughing again.
It warms something inside of me that I can make him laugh so easily.
We exit the park and make our way down 6th Avenue past the MoMA and Radio City Music Hall.
We spent a long time in the park, so MoMA will have to wait for another visit to NYC; one I very much hope to make again in the future.
As he carries me piggy-back, I reminisce. “I remember going ice skating a few times with Hailey when we were younger. I still can’t believe she ran away. I thought I knew my sister inside and out, but I guess I never really understood her at all. Are you close with Tatiana?”
“I guess. I mean, she’s my sister. She’s also one of the sweetest people you will ever meet.”
“Hailey was being abused.” I don’t know why I blurt that out. I’ve been thinking about my sister a lot lately. I guess I just need someone to talk to about her.
Fallon stops and releases his hold on me, and I slide down his back to stand on my own feet. He turns around and looks down at me. People don’t even seem to mind that we’re standing in the middle of the sidewalk. They just walk around us.
I look up at him. “There were signs. I was so stupid because I saw the warning signs. I saw the bruises. I allowed her to convince me they were nothing to worry about. Casual bumps into doors or falls during PE class. What kind of sister was I to not see what was right in front of my face?”
Fallon shoves my hat back on my head and tugs it in place. “Always remember the good times with her. Just say the word and I’ll ask Dad to get a PI to look for her.
Okay, wow. This freaking guy.
“I just wish I knew why, you know? And I wish she would come back, or call me, or something, so that I know she’s okay. I feel like I’ve lost her just like I lost Mom and Dad.”
He takes my face in his gloved hands as tears streak down my cheeks.
“Hey, shhh. None of that. You’ll find her.
Maybe not today or tomorrow, but I have faith and so should you.
” He wipes under my eyes, the material of his gloves drying my cold, wind-stung cheeks.
“Whenever you want to talk about her or your family, I will always be here to listen.”
“You really are a nice guy, Fallon. I wish we could have been friends sooner.”
“You and Ryder seem to be the only ones who think that. I’m really not that nice.
I pick fights and have a temper. I steamroll over people.
I don’t have the same repercussions for my bad actions as most people because I know my family’s money and power will get me out of trouble.
Those are not the qualities of a nice person. ”
“Depends on your perspective. From where I’m standing, you are so much more.”
Fallon leans in. “Elizabeth?”
His blue eyes are hypnotizing, and I get a little lost in them. “Hmm?”
His eyes scan my face for long seconds. “Nothing.” He straightens back up. “Let’s go ice skating. We’re almost there.”
After skating for about an hour, Fallon takes me on a horse-driven carriage ride under the cloak of darkness.
The carriage eventually drops us back at our hotel, where we order room service for dinner and watch a movie.
At midnight, we sit out on the main balcony and survey the city around us.
Fallon excuses himself and walks back inside the suite, returning a minute later holding my new passport out to me.
I flip through it. “Wow. You and your dad are impressive. Thanks for this.
“You’re welcome.” He sits back down. “Secret for a secret?” he asks me.
I make a humming sound, feeling pleasantly relaxed after a long but fulfilling day. “Secret? I had a great time with you today.”
Fallon rolls his head to the side to look at me, a grin curving his mouth. “That’s not much of a secret, but I had a great time, too.” He reaches out with his hand and I place mine in it. “Close your eyes Elizabeth and tell me who you see.”
I allow my eyelids to flutter close. “I see Ryder and Jayson.” I open my eyes. Fallon is still looking at me. “But when I open my eyes, I see you, Fallon.”
He breathes deeply and stands up, lifting my hand to his mouth. He presses a soft kiss to my knuckles. “Good night, kitten. Be ready to go by six in the morning.”
“Good night, Fallon,” I whisper back.