Chapter 14
A relieved sigh escapes when I get to the last form, then I sigh again when I see that it’s another one where you have to detail your entire medical history and life with checkboxes.
Shaking out my hand to the relieve the cramping, I begin again, the black ink of the pen scribbling check marks on the printed paper.
I’m unsure of many of the questions being asked.
Some are easy. Name. Address. Social Security Number.
Date of birth. Sex. Allergies. Date of last menstrual cycle is a little harder since I never keep track of them.
I guess I should start doing that. I’m clueless how to answer the family history questions.
Mom would always fill that stuff out for me.
The only box I’m sure about checking for them is the one that says deceased. Jesus, that’s depressing.
Jayson’s hand stills my jittery knee. With each form I fill out, my knee bounces more rapidly.
“Want me to take over?” he asks.
No way am I allowing him to answer questions about the date of my last pap smear, if I’m sexually active—Well, duh. I have a bun in the oven. Or what type of contraception I use.
“Almost done.”
An older woman sitting two chairs down from us, her stomach bulging and perfectly round, frowns when Jayson touches my leg. It’s not the first disapproving look we’ve gotten from her this afternoon.
Julien quickly flips through a women’s magazine before taking out his phone and opening his Netflix app.
I doubt obstetrics offices will carry the latest Sports Illustrated or Car and Driver.
Fallon hasn’t gotten here yet, but he did send a text saying he just left Montgomery Pharma and is on his way.
Jayson relaxes back in the pale, blue-cushioned chair. “Heard from Ry yet?”
My shoulders hunch as the pen I’m using digs into the paper, checking another box.
Ryder texted me during lunch period, letting me know he was back, and said he was going to the garage to help his dad and for me to stop by there after school instead of going to his house.
Ryder had another oncology appointment this morning for more bloodwork.
His medical team is at Duke, which is forty-five minutes away in Durham.
Jamie went to the appointment as well. The doctors wanted to talk with both her and Ryder about what comes next.
I lied to Ryder and told him that I had to go into Highland after school to run an errand for Daniel and would see him later tonight.
And now I feel guilty again for being so duplicitous.
Last night, we skirted around all conversation of Maria as gracefully as avoiding a literal elephant in the room.
Once everyone left and it was just me and Ryder, I tried to get up the nerve to tell him everything.
And failed miserably. I used one excuse after another to justify my silence, then cried myself to sleep when he left to go home, not able to spend the night because of having to be in Durham today.
Ryder is going to hate me when I finally tell him. Can eight days destroy a lifetime of friendship and love? That’s how long it’s been since those two pink lines flipped my world upside down.
“I’ll be right back,” I tell the twins, taking the forms with me to the reception desk.
I fumble the clipboard when I hand it over to the woman at check-in. The pen somersaults in the air in an impressive double backflip before landing on her computer keyboard.
She gives me a kind smile and picks everything up. “Alright, Miss Fairchild. Let me scan your insurance card and photo ID and I’ll get this entered into our system.”
With shaky hands, I unzip my carry wallet, finding the insurance card Daniel gave me, and hesitate. Once I give her the card, I’ll have no choice but to tell Daniel that I’m pregnant. He’ll see the insurance claim once it processes.
“Her bill will be paid for by the Montgomery Foundation.”
I jump like a startled cat at Fallon’s voice behind me.
“Jesus, Fallon!” I hiss turning around, ready to punch him in the arm when I’m met with a bouquet of the most beautiful pink roses.
Stupefied and at a loss for words, I accept the fragrant bundle as he deftly passes a credit card to the receptionist.
“You brought me flowers?” I ask in a tiny voice, tears gathering in my eyes. Why is everything making me cry now? It’s annoying.
“Christ, kitten. Don’t you dare cry.” He bends down to kiss my cheek. “And yes, I did. It’s not every day you get to meet your son or daughter for the first time.”
And holy crap, do the fat alligator tears start falling. The sweetness of his gesture is overwhelming. As are his words. He’s right. Today is a very important day, and one I need to be fully present and engaged in. The guilt and worry can wait until later.
I swear the woman behind the counter emits an aww as she hands him back his card—which dampens my sentimental mood a little.
I smack at his hand. “You are not paying for my medical bills. Daniel has insurance.”
“I’m not. Montgomery Pharma is. Your dad is on our payroll now. Consider it an employee benefit.”
I know he’s just telling me that, so I won’t argue with him anymore. Daniel doesn’t work for MP; his company is being privately contracted by them. Contracted employees don’t receive medical benefits, sick leave, or retirement plans.
“Thanks a lot for making us look bad,” Jayson says, eyeing the flowers and scowling at Fallon.
“My pleasure,” Fallon replies, sitting down next to Julien who holds his fist up to bump in hello.
Just as I’m sitting back down, a nurse calls my name from an open door next to the check-in desk.
All three guys stand up with me and the woman sitting near us, who has been giving me the side eye of disapproval since I got here, frowns even more.
Tired of her judgmental glances, I hand Fallon the roses and reach out, taking both Jayson and Julien’s hands with each of mine and give her a haughty smirk. Bite me, lady.
I’m sure I’ll receive more of those types of stares once I start showing.
I’ll get snide whispers in the hallways at school.
I’ll get ridiculed and laughed at. More than likely, words like slut will fly from people’s mouths when they see me.
It’s a reality that I need to prepare for and accept, and not let it break me when it does happen.
Those people’s opinions don’t matter anyway.
I only have five more months of school before graduation.
Before adult life starts. Before I’m forced to become a parent with important responsibilities.
“Oh, are they all coming in with you?” the nurse asks me, her eyes wide.
“If that’s alright.”
She looks at Fallon and recognition flares in her eyes. “Yes, absolutely,” she stutters. “You’re Fallon Montgomery, aren’t you?”
He nods at her and puts a hand to my lower back, gently ushering me forward. He gets fawned over a lot because of who he is and how much money his family has.
The nurse pulls me aside and whispers, “Are you sure you want all of them in the room with you? We’ll be doing an intravaginal ultrasound today and you may not want…them to see…” Her face goes fire-engine red.
I hadn’t even thought about that. Jesus. Okay. Um…compromise. “Can they come in and then step outside the room when I have to get ready for that?”
If I try to tell the guys they can’t stay to see the ultrasound, I’m going to have a riot on my hands. Especially from Jayson.
She pats me on my arm. “Sure, sweetie. We’ll figure something out.” She beams a smile at the guys, her eyes lingering dreamily on Fallon for a second. “So, who’s the lucky dad?”
She gets to watch as three pairs of male eyes turn and stare at me. So freaking awkward. Moving on.
Trying to be chatty as she motions for me to enter a room to the right, she says to Jayson and Julien as we all file into the small room, “You must be her brothers.”
Metal stirrups reach up from the patient table like it’s some kind of medieval torture device.
The guys halt in their tracks when they see it, their faces various shades of red and green.
Maybe this isn’t such a good idea having them all in here.
I hop up on the examination table so she can take my blood pressure and temperature.
Julien’s tongue unglues first. He points to Jayson. “Uh, we’re brothers.”
The nurse gives him an incredulous grin as if to say, “I figured that out on my own seeing as you’re twins.”
Fallon places the roses on the floating table jutting out from the wall where a computer screen and keyboard sit.
He takes a seat in one of the two chairs, and Julien follows.
Jayson comes over to stand beside me, hovering.
He’s always hovering now. I give him a small shove to knock it off.
After answering a few more questions the nurse asks me, she hands me a gown and a thin, cotton blanket, giving me instructions on what to do next.
Because Julien is awesome and knows it’s time to hightail it out of there, he announces, “We’ll step outside. Knock when you’re done.” He pulls Fallon out the door when the nurse exits the room.
Jayson remains planted in the spot beside me, and I raise my eyebrows at him.
“It’s not like I haven’t seen you naked before.”
That sends me into peals of giggles for some reason. He’s right, but also wrong. Ryder is the only one allowed to see me in any state of undress now. I’m his girlfriend, not Jayson’s. Then why is Jayson, Julien, and Fallon here with you and not him? Shut up, guilty conscience!
“Could you pull the curtain and stand behind it, then?”
He does as I ask. With the thin barrier between us, I strip out of my clothes, making sure to fold my bra and panties and hide them in my jeans so no eyes see them. I’m mortified enough as it is without allowing the guys to get a peek at my pink boy shorts and matching pink lace bra.
“You nervous?”
If the state of my shaking hands and wobbly knees are any indication, the answer is a resounding, yes. “Excited. You?” I ask him.
The flower-patterned cloth curtain billows as Jayson moves behind it. “Nervous. Nauseous. Thrilled. Scared out of my ever-loving mind. Feel horrible because Ry should be here too.”
Me too.
“If you promise to keep the camera pointed at the ultrasound monitor and not at me, you can video it.” I want something from today for Ryder to have since he’s not here in person.
Jayson hums in answer. I finally get the robe and blanket secured so that nothing but my arms and my legs below the knees can be seen. “Alright, I’m decent.”
The metal hooks screech as the curtain moves out of the way. Jayson opens the door to let Fallon and Julien back in, a whoosh of cooler air rushing inside the room from the pressure difference.
A new woman soon enters and looks shocked at seeing three guys with me, but she recovers quickly. Turning down the lights, she walks over to me. “My name is Mary and I’m the technician who will be doing your ultrasound today. Are you ready to see your baby?”
Such a huge moment. Such a life-altering, monumental moment.
One full of anticipation, anxiety, and happiness.
I get to see my baby for the first time.
I get to see its little heart beating. I know from all my online reading that it will look like a miniscule shrimp no bigger than a grain of rice.
I’m excited. I’m happy. I’m absolutely petrified.
I slap a hand over my mouth, shoving Jayson out of the way to rush over to the trash bin and retch up the trail bar I ate after school.