Chapter 27
Note to self:
Get a life.
Me: I’m an aunt.
Mae: I’m sorry?
Me: Abe has a kid. A fully formed four-year-old daughter.
Mae: Wait? What? Where did he get her?
Me: Left on his doorstep.
Mae: Like by a stork?
Me: Something like that. I’ll tell you later. My parents are going to flip.
Mae: Yes, they are.
Mae: Has he agreed to go to the wedding?
Me: I haven’t even talked to him yet. HE HAS A KID.
Mae: Maybe we should throw him a baby shower?
Me: Too soon. Way, way too soon.
“So, she just left her on your doorstep,” I asked. “Is that even legal?”
Abe huffed a laugh and glanced over at Hallie. After her breakfast ice cream, she’d pulled on a princess dress over her shorts and t-shirt and was currently holding court on the couch. Theo and Mack sat on either side of her while she regaled them with stories about the many princes she’d loved and lost.
“I didn’t even know she existed until three weeks ago. Celia, her mother, dropped Hallie off at her mom’s house a year ago and hasn’t been back since. She’s been finding herself, whatever that means, somewhere in Arizona. Her mom isn’t in the best health, so she drove from California and…surprise.” He shoved his fingers through his hair. “We’re still trying to get to know each other. I have no idea what I’m doing. She’s so…little and needy and never stops asking questions.”
“How…do you know she’s yours?” I grinned as Hallie set a sparkly pink crown on Theo’s head; Theo winked at her. Every single biological urge to procreate in my body stood and volunteered as tribute.
“The timing works. Celia and I broke up five years ago. She was pregnant and didn’t even know it. Plus,” he turned again to stare at Hallie, “she looks just like you at this age. It’s almost uncanny.”
“Really?”
“Definitely. Has a mind of her own like you, too.” He turned back to the table, shaking his head. “I haven’t had a good night’s sleep since she got here. She’s ended up in bed with me every night. I think she’s scared.”
“I don’t blame her,” I murmured and watched as Hallie handed Mack what had to be the fourth book she’d pulled out and demanded he read. “Must be scary to go from what you’ve known your whole life and suddenly everything is different.”
“Don’t I know it,” he said.
“Mom would freak if she knew.”
“Yeah, she would.”
“She misses you.”
“I miss her, too.” Abe crossed his arms and leaned back in his chair, and I was struck by how different he seemed, but familiar, too. A wave of sadness washed over me. I’d never gotten to see him make that transformation from dumb, gangly teenager to fully functioning adult. It had all happened over the last eleven years. In my mind, he’d been perpetually a teenage kid with a big smile. But he was a grown man now, part owner in a business, homeowner, father.
“I almost feel like I don’t know you. You aren’t very good with the phone calls.” I took a sip of coffee.
“You aren’t so good at telling me about stuff either.”
“Touché.” I tilted my head. “Although it seems like Theo keeps you pretty informed.”
Abe gave me a long look. “He’s pretty good at it.”
“He comes to visit.” I stared at a small water stain on the table. “I didn’t know that. He…he said you told him about the accident.”
Abe put a hand on my arm. “He’s my best friend. I couldn’t disappear and not tell him why.”
“I get it. You went and visited Mack, too.”
“After Grandma died, yeah.” He bobbed his head around to catch my eye. “What’s wrong?”
I pushed the coffee away. “A little part of me has always thought you were mad at me for what happened, and then I heard you’d seen Theo and Mack and I thought, maybe that’s the truth. Maybe you are still angry with me, and I don’t blame you. I really don’t. I missed you, have missed you so much. I wanted to come see you so badly. I haven’t driven since the, ah, accident. Every time I try, I start to panic.”
He squeezed my arm gently. “Ali, look at me.”
Hesitantly, I met his eyes.
“That day wasn’t your fault. You weren’t supposed to be driving. But I let you anyway. I was the adult; you were the kid. You didn’t will yourself to have a seizure. And you didn’t force me to take the blame. I did that all on my own. Sometimes I replay that night and think I was looking for an excuse to leave, you know?”
“But maybe you could have worked it out, if I’d told the truth when I was able.”
His mouth tipped in a sad sort of smile. “Nah, I don’t think so. I was angry about so many things. It was tough for a while after I left. Didn’t know where I was going. Ended up in California for a while and then made it out here to Denver.”
“It’s beautiful here. I can see why you stayed.”
“It’s been good. I’m happy here.”
I tilted my head and inspected him. “I believe you. You seem, I don’t know, content. Calmer, too.”
“I guess I grew up. I even took some business classes at the community college.”
“Really? That’s amazing.”
“Hey, don’t sound so surprised.”
Abe had struggled in school as a kid, squeaking by with a lot of extra credit and teachers who couldn’t flunk a kid who kept showing up even when it was clearly hard. The weird thing was that he liked learning. I remember he once took apart an old radio to figure out how it worked, for fun. He’d loved watching documentaries with Mack and could discuss everything he’d learned. But put a book in front of him and he couldn’t focus.
“I went to this tutoring center to get help with my writing. My tutor there thought I might have dyslexia. Turns out I do.” He frowned into his coffee mug. “That’s why school was always so damn hard no matter how much I tried.”
“Mom and Dad didn’t know?”
“I didn’t even know. I thought everyone saw the words the way I did but I was too dumb to make sense of them. I always felt like I was a disappointment to them.”
“They love you, Abe,” I said quickly. “I-I don’t know everything that went on with Dad, but I know he loves you and Mom, she cries on your birthday every year. She tries to pretend she doesn’t, but we all know.”
He raised an eyebrow. “So, you want to tell me why you’re here?”
I smiled weakly. “Would you believe we took a wrong turn?”
“No.”
“Cal asked me to come.”
“I figured.” He grabbed both our coffee cups, stood, and took them to the sink. There, he rested his hands on the edge of the counter, his shoulders tense, and stared out the small window.
“Could you? Would you come?”
“I’m good here, happy,” he said, his voice low. “I don’t know if I want to stir everything up again.”
I rose and moved to him. I wrapped an arm around his waist and leaned into him. “It’s been eleven years. It’s time, don’t you think? I mean, the choice is yours. I’m not going to make you do anything you don’t want to do but there’s Hallie to think about now.”
A long silence hung between us, and I resisted the urge to fill it. Ultimately, it was Abe’s decision, and I wouldn’t force it. Abe’s life was his and he could spend it as he pleased. Sometimes, I wish I had the guts to do the same for myself—live my life by my rules. Right now, I was in a weird limbo, always worried about making my parents worried. I made concessions for them, lived that quiet life because that made them less anxious.
“Hallie would have to come with us,” Abe said, interrupting my thoughts. “I can’t leave her here, even if I had someone I trusted to take care of her. I’m not sure she’d understand another person leaving her, even if it’s only for a few days.”
“I agree,” I said quickly. “Bring her.”
“It could go very badly.”
“Or it could be the thing that brings us together.”
He nodded. “I’ll think about it. That’s the best I can do.”
“Good. Yes. Do that.” I hugged him tight.
“No promises.”
“Absolutely.” I drew back and saluted him. A maybe was not a no. I could work with that. “No promises. Got it.”
Sighing, he leaned back against the counter. “Can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
He nodded his head toward the living room, where Theo and Mack now sported matching sparkly jewelry with their tiaras. “Is something going on between you and Theo?”
“I’m sorry, what?”
“I don’t know. You two seem pretty chummy.”
“I mean, we’re friends.” Who kissed. And apparently flirted.
“Is that it?”
“I… I, ah, well…”
“Okay. Got it.”
“What do you get?” I asked in confusion. “I don’t even get it.”
“You were kind of crazy about him in high school. Remember that Valentine’s Day with the?—”
I slapped a hand on his mouth. “We are never speaking of that again.”
I’d been fifteen that year and worked up the courage to ask his mom what Theo’s favorite dessert was. She’d given me a recipe for a chocolate cake with caramel syrup, whipped cream, and bits of a candy bar crumbled on top. Then I’d invited Theo over for dessert on Valentine’s Day. I might have made it sound like it was a family thing. He definitely did not expect to show up and find a table for two complete with cloth tablecloth and candles. His face when he realized what was happening…I’ll never forget it.
It only got worse when Frankie came home early from his date and discovered us. Never one to keep his mouth shut, he alerted the whole family. My brothers came to snicker. My father came out of concern. But it was my mother who sent me over the edge. She walked in, took one look at the cake, and exclaimed, “Oh, is this Becky’s Better Than Sex Cake?”
My teenage soul couldn’t take the embarrassment. So, while the family and Theo ate cake, I made up a lame excuse about homework I forgot about and hid in my room.
Abe’s laughter was muffled. He removed my hand and tweaked my nose. “You had it bad.”
I had been fifteen; I was twenty-seven now. And I still had it bad.
“And you all never let me forget.”
Abe shoulder-bumped me. “Hey, you were a kid.”
“Yeah. I remember. I also remember you sitting me down and telling me to get over it.”
“Well, yeah. You were in high school, and we were three years older. That was a big age difference then.” He smiled, his eyes curious. “Plus, you did make things weird.”
Couldn’t even deny that. I slumped against the counter. “I did make things weird.”
“Like I said, you were a kid. First crush and all that.” He tapped a finger on his chin. “You’re both adults now, you know?”
“And?”
His gaze moved from me to Theo and back again. “It’d be kind of cool to have Theo as a brother.”
“Are we done talking about this yet?”
With a grin that reminded me of teenage Abe, he leaned in and lowered his voice. “You know, he keeps looking over at you like he’s checking to make sure you haven’t disappeared.”
The dragons perked up. It took every fiber of my self-control to not whip my head around and see if what Abe said was true. I waved a hand. “He doesn’t think of me like that. I’m like his little sister.”
Abe snorted and pushed off from the counter. He sauntered past me. “He sure isn’t looking at you like you’re a little sister. Not even a little bit.”