Chapter 33
NOW
‘Bloody hell, you’re alive!’ Kitty said dramatically again on answering.
‘Why do you always say that?’
‘Oh, I don’t know. Because sometimes you take so long to get back to me I think you’re either dead or have been abducted by aliens or something.’
‘Oh, come on, I haven’t been that bad recently, have I?’ Bella asked, making a face that her sister couldn’t see.
‘I think an average of two text messages a week has got to be classed as pretty poor communication,’ her sister said. But there was a smile in her voice. ‘It’s good to hear from you.’
‘Sorry for being crap.’
‘What, recently? Or throughout your entire life?’
‘Ha ha, very funny.’ Bella wondered, actually, why she hadn’t called Kitty much over the last couple of months.
Just hearing her sister’s voice was somehow reassuring, grounding.
It had just been hectic, and confusing. And she wasn’t sure which parts of her life would pass the ‘Kitty test’ and which would earn her big-sisterly disapproval.
‘So. Tell me everything,’ Kitty said, and there was a familiar creak as she sat down on her leather couch.
‘Um. Well, it’s all going OK,’ Bella started, hesitantly.
‘Work going well? What exactly is your job again?’
‘Yeah,’ she said carefully. ‘Work is going well.’
‘And what’s the house like, now you’ve settled in? Getting to know your housemates a bit?’
Bella thought of Henri; the nights they’d spent twisted in his expensive Egyptian cotton sheets.
The fact they now barely saw each other.
She thought of Odette and her cluttered room, the confrontation which neither of them had mentioned since.
And Brad, with his easy-going attitude and the fact that he’d sort of rescued her from a difficult predicament at work.
And the feeling that she got when he was around that she couldn’t quite explain. ‘Yeah, they’re fine,’ she said at last.
There was silence on the line then Kitty said, ‘You would tell me, wouldn’t you, if you weren’t OK?’
‘Of course!’
‘Because I worry about you; you know I do.’
‘I know. But you needn’t, Kitty. I’m actually fine. Better than fine, really.’
‘Good. Well, good.’
‘How are you anyway?’
There was a pause. ‘Yeah, I’m OK. Ty’s being a little rascal and refusing to sleep through the night, just when we thought we had that cracked, so we’re trying to survive on a ridiculously small amount of sleep. But otherwise, yeah.’
Bella thought of her own broken nights, but she wasn’t sure nights made short by clubbing, or sex, or worry that you’re pretending to be someone you’re not, quite compared to having to wake up for an infant. ‘Hope it gets better.’
‘Me too.’
There was another pause. The conversation was stilted and neither of them seemed to be able to find a way through.
Bella racked her brain but there was nothing much she could say.
In the end they finished the call, with Bella promising to catch up again midweek.
Once the presentation was over and they’d got Hotel Club status, she would come clean – until then she couldn’t face the fallout.
She lay back on her bed for a while, then seconds later had to jerk herself from the edge of sleep.
If she didn’t do something she’d fall back into slumber and lose half the day.
And Sundays were precious things – not to be wasted.
She had work to do, and washing, and she probably ought to get some food into the cupboards.
Well, Bella, she thought to herself as she got up and pulled on yesterday’s outfit, you really are living the dream.
* * *
The doorbell made her jump. She was in the kitchen, sipping a black coffee and scrolling the news on her phone when it happened, and for a moment she waited to see if anyone else would make the effort to answer it.
It wouldn’t be for her, obviously. Unless it was some sort of delivery she’d forgotten about.
The other bedroom doors remained resolutely shut so on the second ring she sighed, got to her feet and trudged to the front door, flinging it wide. Then she gasped. On the doorstep, almost unrecognisable in some sort of workout gear, earbud in one ear, the other removed in her hand, stood Claudine.
‘Oh. Hello!’ Bella said, trying to hide her shock. ‘What do I— I didn’t expect—What— Why are you here?’
Claudine smiled. ‘I am jogging,’ she answered, as if that explained everything. ‘I am training for the marathon next year. I set myself a challenge each Sunday. Did you know it’s only sixteen kilometres from Paris to Versailles?’
‘Only sixteen kilometres?’
Claudine shrugged. ‘I like to push myself.’
‘Did you plan to run… here? To see me?’
Claudine laughed. ‘Non! I am not stalking you, don’t worry. But it is a long run, I wanted a break, then remembered you lived here and thought it would be fun to say hello!’
‘Oh,’ said Bella. ‘Well, hello! Do you want to go grab a coffee? There’s a lovely café…’
‘No,’ Claudine shook her head and for a moment Bella thought she was simply going to – literally – jog on. But then: ‘I can just have one here. If that’s OK with you of course? We talked about your place that time at the bar and I’d love to see it.’
‘Oh, it’s a bit of a mess, really…’
Claudine’s face reddened. ‘If I’m honest,’ she said, in more of a whisper, ‘I really need to pee. All this running. And hydrating. I…’
‘Oh! Of course!’ Bella found herself stepping back, inviting Claudine in.
As she did so, her stomach, which had already sunk as a result of opening the door to find her boss on the doorstep on a Sunday morning, dropped to a new low.
Because of course, Claudine thought the house was hers; that she was inhabiting it solo.
She didn’t know that ‘Isabella’ was a tenant in a down at heel student house.
Probably, Claudine wouldn’t judge her on her living circumstances. But she might judge her for lying. Bella gestured towards the kitchen, trying desperately to remember what kind of state it was in.
In her own place, Bella had tried to keep things tidy, and mostly she’d succeeded.
But here, something about having no stake in a place and living with multiple occupants, had brought out her inner sloth.
She often left washing up to the last moment, mugs on the side.
There was always an unspoken battle amongst them all, about whose turn it was to empty the bin, and it was often left piled high until one of them cracked.
Sure enough, the kitchen was in a state; Bella, looking at it with new eyes, was suddenly ashamed. ‘Sorry about the mess,’ she said. ‘I have— There are housemates.’
‘Oh, you are renting rooms to others! Of course!’ Claudine exclaimed. ‘Always the businesswoman.’ She pulled out a chair at the small wooden table, lifted a magazine from its seat then slid into it. Bella quickly cleared the debris from the table’s surface and flicked it over with a cloth.
‘Please do not go to any trouble,’ Claudine said. ‘I am just sorry that your housemates are so slovenly.’
‘Um. Yes,’ Bella said, boiling the kettle and locating the good coffee pot – the one without the chip. ‘I’m meaning to speak to them about the mess they leave. This is my home after all.’
Claudine nodded sagely. ‘Very wise.’ Her nose crinkled slightly as she glanced around the room. ‘The kitchen is very quaint though. I can see without the mess it would be quite cute. You will have to give me a tour! I would love to see the rest of it.’
Bella made a sound that was a little like a laugh, but ever so slightly like a squeak of fear. ‘Of course,’ she said. ‘I’d love to show you around.’ She poured water onto the coffee grounds then set the pot on the table. ‘Let’s have a coffee first though, eh!’
Once the coffee was served, Claudine seemed to relax a little. She stretched out her legs and sighed as she sipped from her mug. ‘Ah, I try not to drink too much coffee, but sometimes it is exactly what I need.’
‘Definitely. Do you run often then?’
Claudine shrugged. ‘I find it helps with stress. I’ve been— It’s a challenging time. Running clears my mind, helps me sleep.’
Claudine hadn’t struck her as someone who’d ever experienced stress. Somehow her work persona was all hard edges and efficiency. But seeing her now, in her stretchy running gear, looking tired, she seemed different, more human.
In other circumstances, she and Claudine might have become proper friends.
But Claudine was her boss, and one who believed Bella had a different background, a different life.
It was odd how the lies she’d told to get herself accepted, both here and at work, were the things actually creating a barrier between her and the people around her now.
Her lies – or the places where she’d allowed assumptions to grow without countering misunderstandings – were stacked like a game of Jenga. If Claudine found out that she was renting, or that her housemates thought she was an intern, the rest of it would likely tumble down as well.
But it was still early – just nine o’clock – and she hoped that the others would simply sleep for the next hour as they often did and she’d be able to send Claudine on her way without anything terrible happening.
‘So,’ Claudine said after a few sips of coffee. ‘The tour?’
Reluctantly, Bella led her through to the living room which, while cleaner than the kitchen, had all the marks of a student let: second-hand sofas with worn covers, a line of wine corks displayed proudly on the mantlepiece.
There was a rug that had seen better days, a pile of unopened post on a coffee table.
The curtains were old-fashioned, with coral flowers twisting their length – probably left by a previous owner.
Bella had no idea what Claudine’s place was like, but she imagined it being all glass and granite and polished, shiny surfaces. She looked at Claudine’s face, trying to gauge how she might react.
‘Oh, it is lovely!’ Claudine suddenly exclaimed, clapping her hands together like a delighted toddler.
‘It is?’
‘Yes. So homely. Oh, I get so tired of all the clean lines in my apartment. This reminds me more of coming home to my mother’s.
You have recreated the look perfectly. The curtains!
The vintage couches, even the corks – I love how everything is repurposed and you haven’t wasted anything.
You must be very environmentally conscious. ’
Bella tried to smile. ‘Well, yes. But also I’ll be changing it a little when my divorce goes through and I’m able to buy—’
‘No.’ Claudine put a hand on her arm and looked at her, all seriousness. ‘You must not change a thing. It is perfect.’ She set her drained coffee cup down on the table.
It was odd. But Bella decided she’d take the compliment. Perhaps now she’d be able to guide Claudine to the door and on her way without being discovered.
As if malevolent fate could read her thoughts, at this moment the door opened and Henri wandered in, wearing just a pair of tiny tight briefs, through which he was sporting the beginnings of an erection. His hair was tousled, he was yawning, his eyes were almost closed.
He looked at Bella then at Claudine, then down at himself and abruptly turned and left the room.
Claudine looked at Bella, raising an eyebrow. ‘Was this your lover, Henri?’
‘Yes, that was Henri, but we’re not—’
‘Oh my! I must go. I will let you lovers carry on with your day.’ Claudine tipped her head knowingly and Bella got the impression she had now gone up several points in Claudine’s estimation.
She walked her boss through to the hall, her heart rate slowing a little.
Relieved that despite a few near-misses she’d managed to keep up appearances.
Seeming to be in no hurry, Claudine paused in the hallway and began to carefully appraise Odette’s seascape.
‘I love your painting!’ She leant to inspect it more closely. ‘Is it a Soraya French?’
‘Oh. No. It’s my— it’s Odette’s. She’s one of the… tenants.’
‘She lives here?’ Claudine was almost reverent. ‘Well, if she is one of the messy tenants, I understand you forgiving her slovenliness. If she can produce art like this, she can live how she wants!’
‘I didn’t know you liked art?’
‘Oh, oui. My family— My father was an artist. And my sister owns a gallery and knows lots of curators. I have grown up learning to appreciate good work. But then who could not love this?’ Claudine gestured at the seascape. ‘Give her my compliments, won’t you?’
‘I will,’ Bella said, stepping towards the door in the hope that Claudine might follow. She didn’t want to be rude, but the longer her boss stayed, the more likely she’d slip up.
‘Well, see you tomorrow!’ Claudine said, stretching her legs on the front doorstep.
‘Yes. Bye!’
And she was off, disappearing around the corner and leaving Bella weak with relief.