Chapter 34 Ryan
Ryan
The semester is over, and tonight is the end of the year faculty party, which is a formal affair.
Last year, Claire wore a dark green floor-length gown.
I know men aren’t supposed to notice those details, and I can’t tell you anything about what anyone else was wearing.
I can’t even tell you about the suit I was wearing.
But I can tell you about Claire’s dress and the way I couldn’t keep my eyes off of her all night.
Finals are all completed and graded, and I submitted all my students’ grades this morning.
I’m nearly done with this semester’s work.
All I have left is graduation next week, which the faculty normally have to work.
Last year, I made bingo sheets for all the professors, and we marked off the trite phrases used by the administration and the students during their speeches. It was the only way to pass the time.
Claire and I sat next to each other, laughing and putting Xs on our boards. I won’t be doing that with her this year…unless things go well with her tonight.
That’s right. Tonight is the night. I’ve made up my mind. I’m going to FINALLY tell Claire how I feel, no holds barred. This is my ultimate chance, and I refuse to mess it up.
After getting dressed in my navy-blue suit, white dress shirt, and blue tie with the quadratic formula, I drive to the Coastal Vista Community College ballroom. Located on campus, it’s an event center for special campus gatherings.
As I walk up to the entrance, Grace and Betsy greet everyone at the doors.
“Looking sharp, Ryan,” Grace says.
“Thank you, Grace. You, too.” I’ve been careful not to lead Grace on, but she does look nice.
This year’s fiesta is hosted by the STEM division, and the theme is the Golden Ratio Gala, named for the golden ratio discovered by the Greeks.
Grace is on theme, wearing a shimmering gold gown, reminding me of an Oscar award.
Or are those statues naked? Never mind. Either way, she’s in all gold.
Meanwhile, Betsy is scowling in her seat, wearing a deep red dress.
“You look lovely, Betsy,” I say, and there’s a slight glimmer in her eye that disappears as fast as it arrived.
“Go on in!” Grace says, gesturing at the double doors. I thank her and walk in, immediately scanning for Claire. Is she bringing Zach? Why didn’t I think this through? How will I get her alone so I can finally talk to her?
“Looking for someone in particular?” Christopher’s voice sounds behind me. I turn and laugh when I see his getup—he’s wearing a toga.
He deadpans. “What?”
I gesture at his toga, and he looks down at his clothes. “Oh, this? Yeah, I had it in the back of my closet and figured this was an appropriate occasion.”
The problem is that I’m not one hundred percent sure he’s joking.
“Looking for Claire?” he asks, a twinkle in his eyes.
“Yes. I mean, no. I just…”
Christopher puts a hand on my shoulder. “Did you tell her how you feel yet?”
My eyes widen. “How did you…”
Christopher just gives me a wink. “A department chair knows these things about his coworkers.”
“I’m not sure that’s completely true.”
He gazes past me toward the entrance. “Well, here’s your chance.” He nods his head toward the double doors, and I turn to see perfection embodied in the female form.
Claire stands at the entrance looking like all my dreams come true. Her auburn hair is curled and swept over one shoulder, and her dark purple gown looks like it belongs in a Bond film.
I thought green was her best color, but I was wrong. It’s purple.
I can’t take my eyes off of her.
“You should probably blink if you’re going to talk to her,” Christopher mutters.
I shake my head to get out of my daze, grateful she hasn’t caught my eye yet. I don’t want to look like a gaping fish when she sees me.
My first coherent thought after the initial shock of seeing her is that she’s alone. Zach didn’t come with her.
If she were mine, there’s no way I’d want her out at a party looking like this without me there. And it’s not some primal, caveman thing of not wanting anyone else to see her, or letting people know she’s taken. It’s because I’d never want to miss a moment of seeing her like this.
But if I’m being honest, I don’t want to miss a moment of being with her at all.
My next thought is how she’s going to react when I walk up to her. It’s been so awkward between us, and I know she intentionally pulled away, but I’m determined to let her know how I feel tonight.
Apparently, that’s not something I need to worry about.
Because the second she sees me from across the room, her eyes light up and her grin takes over her face. I thought she was beautiful before, but now she’s enchanting.
She heads my way, and I hear Christopher whisper, “Here’s your chance, Lover Boy. Don’t forget to speak.” Then he waves at Claire and heads off to talk to someone else in the room. I don’t know who, and I don’t care.
All I know is that Claire is standing in front of me, smiling softly at me, and giving me a quiet, “Hey.”
“Hey.” It’s all I can manage right now.
She looks around the room. “So, looks like I haven’t missed much yet.” She nods in Christopher’s direction. “That’s a new look for him.”
I chuckle, finding my voice. “Yeah. But I think we already knew he takes these events very seriously.”
“I just didn’t think anything could top last year’s ‘self-portrait.’”
I snort a laugh. Last year’s gala was hosted by the arts department, and Christopher had a gold picture frame around his head, claiming he was a “masterpiece.” “Does a toga top the self-portrait?”
Claire hums thoughtfully. “At least last year I didn’t have to see his bare shoulder.”
I burst out laughing, partly because it is hilarious, but mostly because it feels like us.
How we’ve always been on the same page, able to crack each other up and see through the ridiculous antics of our coworkers.
I don’t know why Claire decided to jump back into our friendship tonight, but I’m beyond relieved.
One more thing to clear out of the way. I say casually, “Is Zach coming late?”
She shakes her head. “Bachelor weekend with Tyson.”
Perfect.
She looks around the room, the light catching on her gold earrings. “What have you done already?”
She’s referring to the tables set up around the room: guessing which rectangles actually match the golden ratio, an art gallery with the golden ratio in nature, a golden frame photo booth, and a wheel of fortune type game with math equations.
“Nothing yet,” I say. “I got here right before you.”
She looks back at me, eyes glowing and a beautiful smile on her lips. She’s grinning at me in a way she hasn’t in weeks. My Claire is back, and it couldn’t have happened at a better time. “Well, then, let’s go!”
Claire and I spend the next hour playing games and socializing with our colleagues. I’m in such a good mood, I’m not even annoyed when Liam brags about his Calculus 1 pass rates. Well, fine. I’m a little annoyed. But Claire and I share a secret, knowing look, and it replaces the annoyance with joy.
We sit at a table with our math team for dinner and enjoy our meal together.
When they bring out two options for dessert—cake or ice cream—Claire and I choose one of each and share bites off our plates.
It’s exactly the kind of thing a couple would do.
Well, it’s what Claire and I would do. Zach would never share with Claire. And I think she knows that.
The college president says a few words of appreciation but keeps it short and sweet, knowing teachers have even less patience for lectures than students. Then they turn on music and open the dance floor.
Claire’s face lights up. “Let’s dance!” She stands and grabs my hand, pulling me from my seat and out onto the dance floor.
The song is “Celebration” by Kool & the Gang, and Claire starts busting out her best disco moves, pointing her fingers and sliding peace signs with her fingers across her eyes.
My stomach hurts from laughing so much. It feels just like old times.
We dance together on the floor for about half an hour, not caring about anyone around us and laughing our heads off. It’s fun and light and fills me with all the confidence I need to tell Claire how I feel.
The music changes from upbeat to something slow and romantic. Her eyes flash to mine, and she holds my gaze for just a moment too long. She looks like she wants to dance with me but doesn’t know if we should.
She grins at me. “I need a breather. Want to go outside?”
I nod. This is it. This is my chance to lay it all on the line, and I’m going to take it. No regrets, no second-guessing.
It’s now or never.