Chapter 29
Twenty-Nine
Since Mrs. Drake had gone, Gretchen and the footman accompanied the children and me on a walk, and we were setting out when we found Lord Brookhaven waiting on the sidewalk outside the door.
“May I walk with you?” He bowed.
“Of course.”
The children greeted him with wide smiles.
So we set out, Sarah and Joshua, Gretchen, the footman, and Lord Brookhaven.
A group of men stood just across the street, one of whom was Henson. It occurred to me that they were probably waiting for Mr. Sullivan to show up and try to collect the fortune from me.
Lord Brookhaven was tall and well-built, with wide shoulders and a thick chest. A lady wasn’t supposed to notice such things, but of course, ladies weren’t blind just because they were ladies.
But I was still angry with him, angry and confused, and my mind kept going back to our last conversation when I’d cried tears of frustration and hurt over how he’d deceived me.
And then there were the two letters—unacceptably brief letters—he’d sent.
And now he thought he could simply take our morning walk with us?
Gretchen, probably realizing that Lord Brookhaven wished to speak to me, prodded the children along until they were several yards ahead of us and chattering excitedly about a group of geese that were pecking at the grass.
“I am aggrieved,” Lord Brookhaven began without preface, “that what I intended to be a gift has caused you so much pain.”
“It was the deception more than the actual gift that caused me pain.”
“Yes. Quite right. It was very ill conceived, and I am sorry. I only hope that one day you can forgive me.”
I said nothing. The contrary part of me hoped he sincerely meant the words, that he was very sorry, and that he was worried I might not forgive him.
“I also came to tell you that I had some men investigating Gilbert White. They were able to find evidence and witnesses to some of his thievery. He was apprehended early this morning, and the constable and barrister I spoke to say he will probably be sentenced to fourteen years and transported to Australia. It is the usual sentence for thefts of this kind.”
Fourteen years was a long time, and very often, criminals sentenced to transportation to Australia never returned to England. And in fourteen years, Joshua and Sarah would be adults.
I should probably thank him for caring enough to make sure the man who threatened Joshua and Sarah would no longer be able to harm them—or me, for I was the person he had been threatening.
“And I hired some men who found that Mr. Sullivan has fled the country and gone to France, they believe. He will probably never be caught, unless he returns to Great Britain.”
“And if he is caught and brought to trial,” I said, thinking aloud, “I suppose it will become public knowledge that you gave me fifty thousand pounds of your own money. Perhaps it would be better if he was not caught.” I said this with a touch of bitterness.
“Perhaps.” He sighed. “I am very sorry, Miss Robbins. I realize my actions may possibly expose you to gossip, and you don’t deserve that. I only hope that one day you can forgive me.”
He was so contrite, I felt a pang of guilt for wanting to torment him.
After a few moments of silence, I said, “I do forgive you. And if you and Lady Derringer want to set up an orphanage with what is left of the fifty thousand pounds, then I am glad. I will not keep the money.”
I wanted to ask if they would place Sarah and Joshua in the orphanage, if that was how they intended to make sure they were taken care of, but I knew it was.
“For now, as we are making plans and you are helping us set up the new orphanage, please continue on as you are.”
What else could I do? I wasn’t ready to leave Sarah and Joshua.
We walked along, listening to the children’s chatter, and Joshua said, “Can Samuel and Annabelle come too?”
We doubled back to Lord Brookhaven’s house to collect them. Suspiciously, they were already dressed and ready to go to the park.
They greeted me, with Annabelle embracing me, and we continued on our way.
When the children were all distracted and talking with one another, I asked Lord Brookhaven, “Were you planning to take Samuel and Annabelle to the park?”
“I was hoping you and Joshua and Sarah would ask for them to accompany us, but if you didn’t, I was planning to take them myself.”
I glanced at him from the corner of my eye. How I wished he loved me.
But the very next moment, anger replaced the longing. Why had he given me fifty thousand pounds, making me believe it was an inheritance? And why encourage me to come to London and establish myself in society? It was so confounding. He was so confounding.
Sarah stopped. “This is where I first saw you, when you went with me to help Joshua.”
It was the very spot.
Two big tears spilled from her eyes.
“What’s the matter?” I carefully knelt in front of her.
Sarah’s chin trembled, then her lip. She shook her head.
I held out my arms to her and she relaxed into me. We stood there embracing each other, and I had to make a huge effort to keep my own tears from falling. Being able to comfort her seemed to heal something inside me.
The other children came near. Annabelle put an arm around Sarah, and Joshua and Samuel patted her on the back.
Sarah pushed herself out of my arms as she took a deep breath, which seemed to dry up the tears. Lord Brookhaven was watching us.
“All will be well,” he said. “You will never be alone again. Miss Robbins, Lady Derringer, and I will make sure of that.”
Sarah nodded. Then she took Joshua’s hand, and we continued walking toward the park.
The children played blindman’s buff and hide-and-seek, and Lord Brookhaven and I watched.
After half an hour, I asked, “Why did you do it?” I tried to keep an even tone, without accusation. “I just want to know.”
“I wanted to give you choices. I wanted you to know what it was like to be able to do what you wanted in life.”
I sat and pondered his words, directing my gaze to the children and their game, but not really seeing them. Why would he want to give me choices?
I was about to ask him, but just then, Joshua fell and Sarah cried out, “Joshua, you need to be more careful” in her best older-sister tone. “Do you want your arm to grow back crooked?”
As they raised their voices at each other, I wondered if I should intervene, but Gretchen began talking quietly to them, and soon they stopped arguing and started playing again.
Annabelle came over and looked pleadingly at Lord Brookhaven. “Can Joshua and Sarah come home with us?”
“It is all right with me,” Lord Brookhaven said, “but you’ll have to ask Miss Robbins.”
The other children came running up to ask the same thing.
“Yes, it’s all right, but you can’t be arguing.”
“We won’t,” they all chorused.
“I think they’re ready for their tea,” Gretchen said with a matronly smile. I couldn’t help wondering if she’d be willing to share her mothering ways with a whole orphanage full of children.
We started on our way home, and I noticed Joshua’s eyelids were heavy and his feet were starting to drag. He wasn’t used to walking and running so much.
A minute later, Joshua stumbled. Without a word, Lord Brookhaven scooped him up, carrying him in his arms.
Sarah and Annabelle held hands and talked to Samuel as we went, the footman and Gretchen trailing the children.
The next week was a whirlwind of activity, accompanying Lady Derringer and Lord Brookhaven to call on various wealthy Londoners who might be interested in helping to start an orphanage and school.
One day, Lord Brookhaven, Lady Derringer, and I were having tea and discussing what we needed to do to secure a second building to house boys. I was secretly thinking that I couldn’t bear to separate Sarah and Joshua. It felt cruel to do so.
“There is a building close to the docks,” Lord Brookhaven was saying, “that might be suitable for the boys. But Lady Derringer knows a clergyman who has started an orphanage in his parish, not too far from here. He has a rather dilapidated building. It needs work, but it’s large. The only problem is funds.”
“We were thinking,” Lady Derringer said, setting down her teacup, “that we might be able to work with him, fundraising and otherwise. He already has the necessary permits. His name is Gabriel Johnson, and he’s agreed to meet with us tomorrow.”
“Very good.” It would save us some time and effort if we could join with him. But I had a nagging feeling that kept me from expressing enthusiasm.
As I was leaving, Lord Brookhaven helped me with my jacket. It was a simple service, something a brother might do for his sister. But when I looked up to thank him, his face was so close I could see the flecks in his blue eyes.
He didn’t turn away, didn’t even blink, for a long moment. I wanted him to speak. I wanted it so badly my heart seemed to stop beating.
“I will see you tomorrow,” he said softly.
I took a step toward the door and looked away before hurrying out the door.
“William? The servant has just shown Mr. Johnson into the sitting room.”
“He’s early.” William straightened his coat and turned to follow Lady Derringer.
From down the hall, he could see Charlotte entering the sitting room. Lady Derringer was probably introducing them.
William came in just in time to see Mr. Johnson looking smitten as he stared at Charlotte with a slack jaw.
William cleared his throat. It obviously startled him.
His aunt introduced them, and they sat. He eyed Mr. Johnson, then realized he hadn’t smiled at Charlotte yet.
“Lord Brookhaven.” She gave him an intense look. Had she read his thoughts?
Mr. Johnson shared the history of his involvement in rescuing orphans from the streets of London. He sounded quite noble—too noble. Indeed, he was so proud of what he had accomplished, it bordered on arrogance. Surely Charlotte would see through his braggadocious speech.