Chapter 21
AMBER
The afternoon heat seeps into my pores as I lie on a sunlounger next to Dominic.
According to the garden thermometer on the side of the pool house it’s almost forty degrees.
I would rather stay in the shade, but Barney and Felix have nabbed the only parasols.
Instead, I lie as still as possible, imagining I am a wax candle, slowly melting into a puddle on my stripy beach towel.
Sweat beads on my collarbones and pools between my breasts.
I flick it away then raise myself onto my elbows.
Dom and Barney are both asleep. I watch them for a while.
Barney, as pallid and doughy as Dom is ripped and tanned, is snoring, the rhythmic sound drowning out the bassline rumbling of the cicadas and the bees buzzing around a row of lavender-filled terracotta pots on the far side of the terrace.
Dom naps like he sleeps in bed, one arm tucked under his head, the other flung out to his side.
Part of me, the part that craves reassurance, would quite like to crawl onto the sunlounger next to him and snuggle into the crook of his arm.
But it’s too hot for snuggling. It’s too hot for anything.
Victoria and Willow both disappeared inside when we arrived back at the villa after lunch.
Simone is in the daybed, noise-cancelling headphones on.
Listening to some classical music or a podcast about overachievers, probably.
Felix is perched on a lounger nearest the pool, doing The Times crossword.
He must sense me watching him because he looks up from the paper and stares back for a moment, his expression hidden by his sunglasses.
Then he breaks into a smile and gives me a little wave. Feeling slightly silly, I wave back.
I pick up the book Nessa pressed into my hands the day before I left for Greece and, for something to do, scan the blurb on the back.
It’s a domestic thriller about a childless woman who wakes up with a hangover one morning to find a baby in her house.
I put the book back down. It’s too hot even to read.
The pool sparkles in the sun, cool and inviting. I’d swim, but I have the beginnings of a headache, a telltale dull throbbing between my temples. Suddenly craving the air-conditioning in our bedroom, I gather my phone, sunhat and book, and scramble up from the lounger.
‘Where are you off to?’ Felix says, making me jump as he appears beside me.
I glance down at Dominic, but he’s still asleep. ‘Just going inside for a little lie-down.’ I pull a face. ‘Got a bit of a headache.’
‘You poor thing.’ He taps the side of his nose conspiratorially. ‘We’ll blame the sun, not the wine we had at lunch, eh?’
I could remind him I didn’t have any wine but don’t have the energy. Instead, I smile briefly. ‘Will you tell Dom where I am when he wakes up?’
He gives a little bow. ‘Your wish is my command, Amber, dear.’
I nod my thanks and trail past the pool to the French doors that lead into the kitchen, helping myself to a glass of water from the dispenser on the door of the fridge on the way.
In our room, I flick on the air-con, sink onto the bed and roll the cold glass across my brow until it is slick with a mixture of condensation and perspiration.
It’s not long before the AC kicks in. The cold air against my bare skin feels delicious.
There’s a knock at the door and for a moment I hope it’s Dom. But he wouldn’t be knocking on the door of his own room.
I snatch up the T-shirt lying in a crumpled heap at the end of the bed and pull it on over my bikini top.
‘Come in.’
Felix pokes his head round the door. ‘I’ve brought you some painkillers and a glass of water. They’re prescription-strength co-codamol. My GP gave them to me when I slipped a disc last year. They’ll kick your headache into touch.’
I don’t know why, but I feel wrong-footed. I guess I didn’t have Felix down as the caring type. ‘That’s really kind, thank you, but I’m feeling a lot better now. I just needed to get out of the sun.’
‘Understood. I’ll leave them with you just in case, shall I?’ He sets both the pills and glass on the dressing table, but instead of leaving, perches on Dominic’s side of the bed.
‘How are you finding Villa Paradiso?’ he asks, his eyes lingering a little too long on my bare legs, making me wish I’d had time to throw on some shorts.
‘It’s beautiful. Thank you so much for inviting me.’
He smiles. ‘The pleasure is all mine, I can assure you.’
‘Right.’ I rub my hands together as if I’m about to wrap up a business meeting that has overrun. He doesn’t take the hint. Instead, he pats the bed.
‘Come and sit down. I want to hear all about your degree. It’s commendable to want to better yourself, after everything you’ve been through.’
When I make no move to join him, he continues, ‘The problem is, Amber, the world is not a level playing field. People like Barney and Dominic don’t realise just how lucky they are.
They take their private schools, plummy accents and family money for granted.
Did you know I grew up on a council estate in Lewisham?
I left school without a qualification to my name.
Everyone thought I was a waste of space.
My first job was lugging bricks on a building site.
Now I own half of Wapping.’ He puffs out his chest. ‘That showed the bastards who made the mistake of doubting me.’
He stands and I hold my breath, praying he’s about to leave. He doesn’t.
‘Course, Simone likes to gloss over my humble beginnings.’ He takes a step towards me. ‘But you and me, Amber, we’re the same. I sensed it the moment we met. Two people from the wrong side of the tracks who want to make a better life for themselves. Am I right?’
He is so close to me now that I can smell the garlic on his breath.
Instinctively, I jam my hands in my armpits to stop them shaking.
To protect myself. I’ve been here before.
Memories of hot breath in my face push their way into my head.
Hands on my neck, my waist, my breasts. I can’t breathe.
I need to get out of this room, but I am frozen.
Felix is still talking – I watch his lips moving but I don’t hear what he says.
My mind is in another room with another man on another day.
Felix swims in and out of focus. The ground shifts under my feet. The last thing I see before my vision tunnels into a pinprick is him reaching for me, arms outstretched like a zombie in a horror film.
Then the world goes black.