Chapter 16
It was still the middle of the night when Keira tiptoed through the shadows of Raphael’s chamber, her movements careful and deliberate, aiming not to disturb his peaceful slumber. The flickering candlelight cast a gentle glow over the room, revealing the traces of their previous intimacy.
She didn’t want to be here when he woke up. In fact, she feared this situation for reasons she refused to acknowledge right now.
As she made her way to the door, she stole one last glance at the man who had stirred her soul in ways she hadn’t imagined. Raphael lay still, the lines of worry and burden temporarily softened in his slumber.
She felt a pang of guilt for leaving without a word, but she knew the complexities of their circumstances. With a sigh, she slipped out of the room and into the dimly lit corridor, her thoughts a tornado of emotions.
What have I done?
She shook her head. Was it a stupid mistake? Was it what she had come for? Was it what she would stay for and lose her head over? There were so many questions swarming inside her mind, and most shockingly, she knew the answers to every single one of them. Only, she refused to acknowledge them.
She found her way through the darkened corridors, her heart racing as she hurried back. She wondered if that was why the hallways seemed longer, the shadows somehow more menacing, as if they, too, held secrets that were not meant to be revealed.
As she approached her chamber, a muffled noise reached her ears, chilling her to the bone. She paused, her breath catching in her throat, straining to listen. It felt like the sound of footsteps once again.
That same sound was almost drowned by the hushed night. It stopped as abruptly as it had appeared, but she was certain that she had heard something. Or at least she hoped she wasn’t going mad, hearing things just out of her fear.
With a gulp, she pushed the door open and stepped inside, her eyes darting around the room, searching for the source of the noise. The chamber appeared undisturbed, but an unsettling feeling lingered in the air. She made her way cautiously through the room, her senses on high alert.
Then, a sudden movement caught her eye—a flutter of curtains as if disturbed by a breath of wind.
She took a step closer, her heartbeat drowning out all other sounds.
With still trembling hands, she parted the drapes, revealing an open window.
She exhaled deeply, relieved that it was probably just some noise from outside, which, in her state of high alertness, she had mistaken for some monster in the dark.
She awoke with the first light of dawn, her mind still restless from the events of the previous night. The first rays of sun streamed through her window, casting a golden glow over the room. She sat up, pushing aside the remnants of an uneasy sleep. The day would bring clarity, she hoped.
The pleasures of the previous night were something she hadn’t expected. It was far beyond what she had thought she would find here, in this strange man’s castle. She knew that she had to decide if she could allow this to happen or forever forget that such pleasure even existed.
Raphael awoke, the morning light spilling gently into his chamber. He blinked, momentarily disoriented. It took him a few seconds to realize where he was. Then, the memories of the previous night flooded back—the rush of emotions, the passion, the lingering touch of Keira’s lips.
He reached out to the empty space beside him, expecting to find her there. His fingers met only cool sheets. Confusion and disappointment swirled within him. Had it all been a dream? But the faint scent of her perfume still hung in the air, a lingering reminder of the reality he had experienced.
He sat up, running a hand through his tousled hair, contemplating the events of the night.
Her departure gnawed at him, leaving him yearning for more.
Was she upset? Did she regret their actions?
He was unable to decipher the tumultuous emotions that seemed to entangle her.
The uncertainty weighed heavily on his chest.
Raphael quickly donned his attire and, with purpose, descended to his study. His mind was conflicted on how to approach the mess he had put himself into, but there were matters that required his attention beyond his personal predicament.
As he stepped into the study, the familiar scent of aged books and polished wood greeted him. The room felt like a sanctuary, a place where he could gather his thoughts and make sense of the challenges that lay ahead.
Moments later, as they had agreed, Dallas knocked on the door, where he was immediately called inside.
“Good mornin’, m’Laird,” Dallas greeted.
“I hope it will be,” Raphael drawled.
“I have received news just this morn,” Dallas continued, his tone solemn and composed. “The man’s been spotted in a nearby village, at an inn.”
Raphael clenched his fists, feeling the weight of years of anguish and longing. The man responsible for the loss of his beloved wife was closer than he had anticipated. His resolve to bring this man to justice burned brighter than ever.
“How recent is this information?” Raphael asked.
“I do believe it is the most recent one yet,” Dallas assured him. “It comes from a man I highly trust. He wouldnae claim it unless he himself was certain it were true.”
“All right,” Raphael said, his voice determined. “We need to send a scout there, to assure ourselves of this. And we have to move swiftly. We cannae allow this chance to slip through our fingers.”
“Who do ye want me to send, m’Laird?” Dallas inquired. “I could go meself if ye agree.”
“Nay.” Raphael shook his head. “I need ye here, at the castle. Nay. Send someone else—someone ye trust. We need to confirm the identity of the man, to ensure that it is really him. It wouldnae be the first time we were sent on a wild goose chase.”
Raphael remembered the last time well. They had been almost absolutely certain that they had him, that they knew exactly where the man was hiding.
But it had turned out to be a trap set up by one of his enemy clans.
He had lost five men that day. Dallas had gotten badly injured as well.
Returning home that day was a feeling he did not like to remember.
A sense of urgency hung in the air, intertwining with Raphael’s determination to put an end to this long-standing chapter of his life. To be quite honest, he wasn’t that eager to start a new one, especially not with Violet, but he was certain of two things.
His wife’s death needed to be avenged. It was what he had vowed to do. She deserved that much, so she could rest in peace together with their child. The other thing he was certain of was that Keira’s arrival changed everything, and just like that, her departure would have the same effect.
“Are ye all right, m’Laird?” Dallas suddenly inquired politely. “Ye seem thoughtful somehow, lacking in focus, which isnae like yer usual self.”
Raphael inhaled heavily. This man sometimes knew him better than he knew himself. “It’s this upcomin’ cèilidh, Dallas, and everything it threatens to do to this castle.”
“Ye mean the betrothal?” Dallas asked, carefully selecting his words.
“Aye.” Raphael nodded. “Maither is relentless.”
“Old Lady MacCurtney just wants ye to be happy,” Dallas reminded him. “It is a maither’s job.”
Raphael smiled. “I ken ye like her, Dallas. But this should be me own choice.”
“So, why nae find a bride of yer own, then?” When Dallas asked that question, it sounded so simple. Yet, it was anything but. “The lass ye brought here… the English lass.”
“What about her?” Raphael prompted, lifting an eyebrow.
“Well… aye… what about her?” Dallas asked.
Raphael hated such prying in his private affairs, but he kept no secrets from this man. In fact, Dallas was the only reason he had returned from that ship safe as well as sane. They were now bound by more than just friendship, more than just blood.
Their souls were intertwined, owing each other their lives. That alone warranted nothing but the truth upon being asked important questions such as this one.
“If ye must speak, speak clearly, man.” Raphael frowned.
Dallas, unaffected by the comment, continued, “I always speak clearly to ye, m’Laird, ye ken that. Ever since our destinies intertwined on the ship, ever since we had both saved each other’s lives. Only, ye dinnae like the question, because ye dinnae have the answer.”
Raphael rolled his eyes. As always, Dallas was right, and this time, just like so many times before, Dallas knew him better than he knew himself.
“She is—” Raphael started, but the sudden opening of his study door interrupted him mid-sentence.
Elspeth stood in the doorway, refusing to come in, but still there, omnipresent. Her usually serene countenance was now contorted with palpable anger. Her usually composed features were twisted in displeasure, the lines in her face etched with frustration and disappointment.
The set of her jaw was tight, and her eyes, typically warm and inviting, were now cold and stern. The anger in her gaze was like a tempest, brewing just beneath the surface, ready to unleash its fury.
It was a stark contrast to the calm elegance she usually carried, signaling how profoundly she had been affected by whatever had brought her here.
“Maither?” Raphael stared at her incredulously. “What on earth is happenin’?”
“Ye should be the one to tell me, Raphael,” she replied, her voice so angry that it was on the verge of breaking.
“Tell ye what?” he asked, having no clue what he had done now, but it was obviously something. Something bad.
“Ye’ve won,” she said through clenched teeth, holding the doorknob as if holding on for dear life. “I hope ye are happy. Violet is leavin’, and it is all yer fault.”
Raphael knew his mother was fond of Violet and had hoped for a connection between them. However, he also felt a profound sense of relief, albeit tinged with guilt. Whatever was going on with Keira, the inexplicable connection they had shared, was not something he could deny or wish away.
He met his mother’s gaze, his eyes reflecting the turmoil within. “Maither, I…” he began, struggling to find the right words, for he needed to apologize to them both now.
Elspeth held her hand up swiftly, her anger seemingly subsiding, but only slightly. “I ken it is yer life, Raphael. There are some things we cannae force. But remember, me son, there are expectations when one is the Laird. There are responsibilities.”
“I ken me responsibilities, Maither,” he told her, nodding and understanding the weight of her words. Yet, he couldn’t help but feel a sense of freedom, like a prisoner released from the chains of duty that had bound him for so long.
“Somehow, I doubt that.” She shook her head, a look of disappointment in her eyes that hurt more than her words ever could. “If ye did, ye wouldnae let Violet go.”
Raphael knew it was the right thing to do. Though anger and frustration roiled within him, he was a man of honor. He sighed, steeling himself for the conversation he had to have, and nodded to his mother, a silent acknowledgment of her concerns.
“I will go and speak with her,” he said, his voice firm despite the tumult of emotions within him.
Elspeth’s stern expression softened slightly, a mix of understanding and maternal concern coloring her gaze. She walked over to him and then placed a gentle hand on his arm, a silent show of support. “Handle this with care, Raphael. It isnae just about us… it’s about Violet’s feelings, too.”
He nodded, grateful for her advice and the silent encouragement.
With a deep breath, he turned and made his way towards Violet’s quarters, preparing himself for the difficult conversation that awaited him.
His mother was right. It was not Violet’s fault for being paired up with a man who could not imagine himself getting married. She deserved better. She deserved to be happy.
He hoped that his heartfelt apology would at least start to make things right.