Chapter 15
In his dimly lit chamber, Raphael paced restlessly, the flickering candlelight casting dancing shadows over the room. He couldn’t shake the anxiety that had settled in his chest.
Would Keira wait for him? She hadn’t said anything.
He paused by the window, peering out into the starlit night. The conversation with his mother and Violet had done little to distract him. Soon, he had excused himself from them.
Thoughts of the encounter earlier with Keira still swirled in his mind, a complex blend of frustration, confusion, and desire. He had pushed her away, unable to control his reaction to her revelation about a gentleman waiting for her back home.
“Perhaps I was too harsh,” he mumbled to himself, wrestling with his emotions. He wanted to believe that he could put aside his personal feelings, but there was something about Keira that defied reason.
The deep, rich aroma of whiskey filled the air as Raphael swirled the amber liquid in his glass, lost in thought.
Each sip seemed to burn away a layer of tension, but it couldn’t extinguish the conflicting emotions raging within him.
He leaned against the ornate wooden desk, the smooth surface cool against his palm.
He couldn’t remain seated. His entire body felt as if it were on fire, for a million reasons, all including Keira.
Why had he reacted so strongly earlier? The news of Keira’s betrothal had struck him like a thunderbolt. He knew he had no right to feel the way he did, yet there it was—a mixture of jealousy, frustration, and an inexplicable sense of loss.
As the whiskey slowly worked its magic, his thoughts drifted to Keira. He pictured her fiery eyes, her determined spirit, and the way she held herself—so fierce yet vulnerable. And that kiss, an electrifying connection that had sent shockwaves through him.
An entire hour passed by. He was certain of this passage of time for the simple fact that he glanced at the old clock on the wall every single minute of that entire hour, and yet, she had not come.
He shook his head, downing the drink in one thirsty, desperate gulp.
He needed to get away from the confines of his castle.
As always, a midnight ride might clear his thoughts a little.
He pushed the door, and it creaked open. Before he could even realize what happened, there she was, standing in the dimly lit corridor, almost as if waiting for him.
Keira’s eyes met Raphael’s, and for a moment, time seemed to stand still. The air was thick with unspoken words, a palpable tension between them.
“Keira…” he whispered, his voice laden with surprise. “How long have ye been standin’ here?”
She hesitated, biting her lower lip. The act tore something out of his chest. It was so innocent, yet the underlying tone of passion this simple act exuded drove him insane.
“Long enough to know it is very late,” she replied.
Before he could say anything to that, a distant sound was heard. Their eyes widened, and without thinking, he grabbed her by the wrist, pulling her inside his chamber, and then locked the door behind them. He could see her chest rising and falling quickly as her breathing intensified.
The footsteps drew nearer, echoing in the corridor. He pressed his finger to his lips, signaling for her to be quiet. She obeyed, her eyes still wide and alert.
“It is probably just one of the maids,” he reassured her. It wouldn’t be the first time one of the servants was wandering through the darkened corridors of the castle for whatever reason. “A drink?” he offered.
“No, thank you.” She shook her head. “I would rather have this conversation with a clear head.”
He lifted an eyebrow at her. “So, ye’ve come to discuss a serious matter, then.”
“Isn’t that why you told me to come?” she retorted.
He inhaled deeply, considering pouring himself another drink, but perhaps she was right. He also wanted to have this conversation level-headed.
“You knew, didn’t you?” she suddenly asked. “You knew all along, and yet, you allowed me to make a fool of myself, to demand a kiss, to come here…”
Raphael paced the chamber, frustration in every step. “I cannae explain why I did what I did. I’m as infuriated with meself as ye are.”
“I really doubt that,” she answered, taking a step closer, her voice raw with emotion.
Only now did he notice that she was wearing that same nightgown in which she looked ravishing. He could barely focus on the conversation at hand. How could he, when the silky fabric of her nightgown silhouetted her perfect breasts under the pale light of the candles?
“Dinnae doubt anythin’ about me, lass,” he urged.
“Right now, there is only doubt in my mind about you, Laird MacCurtney.” Keira’s voice trembled, just as torn as he was.
The chamber felt too small, and their emotions too big. The spark that had ignited between them was now a raging fire, threatening to consume everything they knew. Yet, they stood there, drawn to each other, two moths circling a flame that might prove to be their undoing.
“You shouldn’t have brought me here, knowing what lies ahead,” she pushed on. “You’ve turned my world upside down, Raphael. I… I wish I never came here!”
She turned around to head to the door, but he knew he couldn’t let her go. He grabbed her by the wrist again, pulling her towards him, their bodies almost touching, in a moment of raw desire and desperation.
“Keira…” he whispered, but the words refused to come.
The talking he wanted to do involved no words. He could feel his heart pounding inside his throat. He was barely able to breathe, yet he refused to let go of her. He feared that if he did, she would not come back again. And that thought terrified him.
Her lips parted as her intense eyes bore into his. He could see everything in those eyes, for they mirrored his passion and desire for her. He knew she wanted to be here just as much as he did, but rage stood between them.
“I ken ye are furious,” he admitted. “But I’ve never done this before. I’ve never played such games as ye wished to play, and God forgive me, I wanted to play them with ye.”
She didn’t say anything to that. All she did was stare at him, her eyelashes fluttering, her chest rising and falling so tantalizingly, teasing him.
“Do ye want me stop?” he suddenly asked, his grip around her wrist loosening ever so slightly, although he still kept her under his control. “Tell me to stop, and I will let ye go…”
No, no, don’t ever let me go…
That little voice inside of her was becoming louder and louder, and Keira feared it would spill out of her lips and right before him. She didn’t want him to stop. She didn’t want him to let go.
But she couldn’t help but fear what that would mean for her—for them both. Would she be opening herself up to heartache by staying here tonight?
His nearness was intoxicating, and the world around them seemed to fade into the background.
Raphael’s eyes bored into hers, conveying a storm of emotions: desire, frustration, and an overwhelming need.
Keira’s breath hitched as he cupped her face gently, his thumb tracing her lower lip. His touch sent shivers down her spine.
“Ye cannae deny that there is somethin’ between us,” he told her, his voice a low murmur. “That kiss opened a door, Keira. Dinnae ye want to walk through it?”
She wanted to walk through it more than anything else in the world.
Their lips were just inches apart, the magnetic pull between them impossible to resist. The room was charged with anticipation, the moment hanging in the balance.
The choice was hers, and whatever she chose would alter the course of their lives.
“I do,” she finally admitted, allowing the confession to permeate every fiber of her being, filling her with peace.
What would happen tomorrow was irrelevant. The only thing that mattered was the here and now, and she was exactly where she wanted to be, in the arms of this Scottish laird with the strength to move mountains with just one glance of his fathomless eyes.
She allowed her desires to guide her. There was no more logic, no more reason. They were left at the threshold of his room.
Their lips met in a passionate, fervent kiss, a culmination of all the longing and desire that had been building between them. In that stolen moment, the outside world ceased to exist, and the only reality was the intense connection between them.
Raphael’s hands gently slid down her arms, sending electric shocks through her. Keira’s fingers tangled in his hair, pulling him closer. It was a dance of desire, a battle of wills against the expectations that bound them.
For a fleeting moment, they forgot about their engagements, their duties, and the consequences. All that mattered was the heat of their passion, the taste of each other on their lips, and the fervor that blazed between them. And Keira knew that they would not be able to stop now.
Raphael seemed to read her mind, doing everything she wanted him to do. He sucked on her tongue while he kissed her, then gently bit her lower lip. She moaned softly against him, getting lost in the heat of passion.
His hand wrapped around her waist, while the other cupped the base of her delicate neck possessively. She was all his now. She could not imagine ever belonging to anyone else.
“Ye taste so good, Keira…” He pulled away only for a moment, and it awakened sensations inside of her she hadn’t even known she had.
She liked it. She liked it far too much. Her heart was beating so fast as if it wanted to jump right out of her chest and onto the palm of his hand, gifting itself to this man.
Yes, there was still the question of his betrothal, and what would happen in the next two weeks, and how they would handle all of that. In fact, she wasn’t certain whether she would be staying or not. She would…
Oh…
Suddenly, he swooped her up into his arms and took her to the bed, where he placed her down as gently as a feather.
Immediately, Keira forgot about everything.
This was totally unlike her. This was forbidden.
This was sinful. This would bear consequences if someone was ever to find out, but she easily forgot about all that, kissing him back as if that was the last kiss she would ever give, and the last kiss she would ever receive.
Her body yearned for this man, for his touch, for his lips, and he could sense her raw need.
All conscious thought was banished by the touch of his hand on her thigh. She felt the gentle caress of the hem of her nightgown being pulled up, pooling around her waist. She moaned again, more loudly this time. He bit her lower lip again, and it was the most delicious feeling.
Rage turned into even more desire, with that same lack of control, with that same ferocity.
His hand was now on her breast. Although there was a thin layer of silk separating her naked skin from the burning palm of his hand, she could still feel him.
Her nipple pebbled under his touch. Everything about her reacted to him, painfully aware of what he was doing to her, bringing her to the brink of ecstasy so easily.
Deciding to be bold herself, she sucked on his tongue, pulling him closer to herself as his other hand traveled up her inner thigh.
“Should I stop?” he suddenly asked, teasing her. There was that grin of his that she couldn’t resist.
“Don’t stop,” she dared to reply. “Not now…”
“Only if ye tell me how ye feel,” he said playfully, kissing her neck up to her earlobe, his finger gently caressing her most intimate flesh.
His voice in combination with his fingers made her feel weaker than ever. Her insides were on fire. She was burning, and it was all because of him.
“Wonderful…” she breathed, her eyes closed, relishing the sensation, opening her legs to allow his hand more freedom to do whatever he wanted to her.
If she had any modicum of honor, she would rush back to her chamber. But this was why she was here. This was why she had followed him—to feel pleasure before forgetting all about it. Only now, she wasn’t certain that would be possible, for he was showing her more than she had ever expected.
His finger teased her, separating her wet folds gently, like a flower covered in morning dew.
His face lifted to meet hers. They were so close, she could see deeply into his eyes.
This was a new moment for them, an intimacy she hadn’t predicted.
He was playing with her, this wonderful, wicked man, and she loved every moment of it.
His thumb rubbed against her swollen pearl, causing friction and pleasure at the same time.
While he pleasured her, his lips took hers in a kiss that demanded everything of her, a kiss that would never again be matched by any other man in the world. Keira knew that much.
The delight of his touch was a pleasure she had not known existed, and she felt as if her entire core was inflamed. It was a tidal wave of delight, which swept her away.
She moaned against his lips, so hungry for him, so wet. There was nothing she wanted more than to stay in his arms forever, to feel this sensation over and over again.
Her entire body was trembling, thrilled to its very core, yearning to release all this pent-up desire.
His breath was hissing against her lips, warm and moist, as his fingers worked her petal-pink lips to madness.
He knew exactly what to do, how to play her like a virtuoso, so she would make the most wonderful music and spill it onto his very hands.
Holding on had become torture. She wanted release. No, she yearned for it. She had to have it.
She had already been brought to the brink of the precipice, and both his fingers and kisses pushed her down so easily.
She felt as if she was falling as the sensation hit her, without a warning, absolutely cataclysmic.
It was nothing short of blissful, as her heart pounded, her entire body trembled, and her breath caught in her throat.
For a moment, it felt as if she had died and gone to Heaven. A caress brought her back to the present moment.
“How do ye feel?” Raphael asked again.
“Beyond wonderful.” She smiled as he pressed his lips to hers.
Wrapped in the afterglow of their impulsive passion, she felt him embrace her. She wasn’t aware when she fell asleep. It was a stolen moment, a fragment of time where they were able to forget about everything, and it was beyond anything she could have hoped for.
But this feeling didn’t come without its own peril, and she knew that she would need to face it sooner rather than later.