Chapter 14
Fourteen
Allegra
If Jared McCulloch grunted at me one more time, I was going to scream.
He’d gone from politely distant to downright rude this morning.
It was a miracle I’d managed to get out of bed considering I’d only had a few hours’ sleep, but I didn’t want to let Jared down with the chickens.
I promised him I’d take care of them, and I meant it.
Just because I’d lost track of time last night working on a final piece for my show didn’t mean I could shirk my responsibilities within our new arrangement.
Jared had appeared surprised to see me up and about too.
He looked a little haggard, and anytime I asked him a question he just grunted at me.
Suspicion grew as he abruptly stood up to clean his breakfast plates.
I could tell he was going to walk out of the house without another word.
Head heavy with tiredness, I didn’t want to argue with him, but why was he treating me like I was an annoying gnat in his kitchen?
Did I keep him awake last night, waiting for me to come home?
Had I inconvenienced him?
At the tense lines of his broad back, I suddenly remembered how I’d felt the night he’d gone to the Gloaming instead of coming home. I’d worried he was with someone, breaking the terms of our deal already.
Would he … could Jared be concerned that I was with someone last night? Not jealous … but irritated I might have broken my word? Or … yeah, jealous?
Stupid hope blossomed in my chest. Stupid, stupid hope. It wasn’t like there was ever going to be a real future between us. Yet, it might be nice to know that Jared did like me and find me attractive, after all. If only to soothe my wounded pride.
I pushed up from the table, fumbling for my phone as I approached him at the sink. “I’m sorry I was so late last night. I hope I didn’t keep you awake.”
He grunted.
Caveman.
Attempting to clear the scowl from my face, I leaned into him, and he stopped cleaning his plate (which was already clean) and straightened.
If he was tense before, his body was now rigid with move away from me vibes.
I didn’t. I tapped on my phone screen and held up the photo before his face. “What do you think?”
Jared scowled at it. “What am I looking at?”
“I got so inspired last night that I abandoned the final piece I’d originally intended to use for my show.
” I traced the image with my finger. Instead of paintings on canvas, I made art with glass.
I infused the glass with flowers, gemstones, real liquid gold, copper, and silver …
the glasswork I showed Jared was a large piece that I’d painted in a mix of greens, blues, and golds.
I’d taken some of the wildflowers from the wedding bouquet Jared gifted me and pressed them in around the edges.
In the middle was a small cascade of aquamarine and peridot gems to represent the water.
Faint streaks of gold shimmered through the center like the sun dapple over the surface. “It’s the loch behind Caledonia Sky.”
Jared took my phone to study the glass art. “This is yours?”
“Yeah.”
“I’ve never seen your art before.” He glanced up from the phone. “It’s beautiful.”
A flush of pride filled me. “Thank you.”
Jared handed the phone back.
My fingers caressed his as I took it, and his eyes flashed to mine. “I was at my studio all night,” I explained pointedly. “When I get inspired like that, time just slips away. I’ll try to be better about that.”
He searched my face and nodded slowly. “Why don’t you go back to bed? I can look after the chickens.”
“I’ll see to the chickens. I made a promise, Jared. I never break my word.”
Understanding dawned in his expression. He nodded carefully. “Me neither. I know what people say about me, but if I promise a person I’m going to do something or not do something, I always keep my word.”
The tension I’d been carrying since he’d visited Sorcha in Inverness eased.
“I’ve spent the last week filling out forms for change of address, change of name, and uploading all my documents for my citizenship.
My art has kind of fallen by the wayside in all of that so, I just …
yeah, I got lost in it. Which is good because I have my show in a few weeks.
” I gave him a small smile. “Would you … I know it might not be your thing, but I’d love it if you could attend it with me. ”
That familiar frown wrinkled his brow. “I … that kind of thing isn’t really … You’re right. It’s not my thing.”
Hurt sliced through me, but I kept my smile in place. “Oh. I just … I thought maybe it might look good to the outside world if you showed up for me.”
Jared moved away from the sink, giving me his back as he wandered into the mudroom. “Aye, but they also know me and know I’m not really a cultured kind of bloke.”
Right.
Except this wasn’t really about him. I huffed bitterly to myself. Truthfully, I shouldn’t be surprised at this point. Jared wandered back into the kitchen, boots on, keys in hand. Expression blank of all emotion.
I breezed past him. “I’m going to feed the chickens.”
I could sense him watching me as I shoved my feet into my boots and grabbed what I needed.
As I strode outside into the sunny but cool morning, I told myself not to be wounded by Jared’s rejection.
No one in my family, except Aria, had ever been interested in my artwork.
My parents liked to brag that I’d graduated from RISD, but they’d never attended any of my shows.
They’d always had some work commitment. While they liked to brag about my success as an artist, I doubted they’d ever contemplated owning a piece of my work.
Aria had. She’d bought pieces for her own home and for Ardnoch Estate.
And I knew it was because she genuinely appreciated my work if she was buying them for Ardnoch.
Was it any wonder I put too much pressure on her to be everything for me?
She was. She was the only person who’d ever really given a shit.
It should not surprise me in the least that my fake husband wasn’t interested.
Hell, I bet a real one wouldn’t have been.
It was weird … I’d had men become infatuated with me.
Most of them, except for one, couldn’t see past my face and body.
Their infatuation meant nothing. It was shallow and physical, and they didn’t care who I really was.
I seemed to lack the ability to interest people enough for them to get to know me and to develop real feelings.
That thought, Jared’s complete disinterest in me, floated above my head like the only dark cloud in the sky as I drove into Ardnoch that morning with the eggs for Morag. I considered calling Gail, my therapist, to arrange a session.
Morag sensed my preoccupation and didn’t keep me long. But as I was walking back to my car, I heard a familiar voice call my name.
I turned and found Sloane waving at me from the back door of her bakery.
Sloane.
Seeing her pulled me out of my gloom. Because Sloane cared about me. I knew she did. Which was why I’d been avoiding her since I’d married Jared. I dreaded telling her. Mentally scolding myself for the wallowing self-pity that had overcome me, I forced myself to walk toward her.
Guilt was already building up from my feet with each step, and it only sharpened when Callie suddenly appeared at her mom’s side.
Ah, hell.
Lying to them pained me.
As soon as I reached them, Sloane grabbed my left hand and pulled the ring up to her face. She gaped at it and then at me. “I wasn’t sure I quite believed everyone until this very moment. You’ve been avoiding me, Allegra Howard. Or should I say Allegra McCulloch?”
My gaze darted between her and Callie’s identical expressions of indignation. “I … we’ve just … We felt bad about lying for so long. I guess, I just didn’t know what to say.” There. That was pretty much the truth.
While Sloane studied me with a deep line between her brows, Callie suddenly beamed. “Aunt Ally, all anyone can talk about is how you got Jared McCulloch to settle down. No one’s surprised it was you, though.”
I scoffed, my self-doubts still lingering. “Why?”
Callie frowned now too. “Because you’re, like, one of the sickest people ever.
You’re an amazing artist, you’ve traveled, you’re tougher than anyone knows, you treat everyone the same, even though you grew up in a mansion in Malibu, and you follow your own path.
You and Mum are totally my heroes, Aunt Ally. ”
Her sweet words hit and soothed every sore spot on my heart.
Before I could stop myself, I burst into tears.
“Okay.” Sloane’s eyes widened a second before she hauled me into the bakery kitchen.
“Did I say something wrong?” I heard Callie ask worriedly as I covered my face with my hands and sobbed.
I shook my head, trying to calm myself.
Sloane rubbed my back, leaning into me. “Allegra, talk to me. What’s going on?”
Grabbing tight to my emotions, my crying slowed, and I wiped at my tears. “I’m sorry. I didn’t sleep last night because of work, and it’s just been a really emotional few weeks.” I reached out to cup Callie’s face tenderly. “You just … what you said means a lot to me, sweetie. That’s all.”
Callie nodded, though she still appeared troubled.
“Right. I’ve decided.” Sloane squeezed my hand. “You and Jared are coming to dinner on Saturday so I can make sure you’re all right. There’s no saying no. You don’t show and I’ll send Walker to come and collect you both.”
I laughed tearfully at her warning. “Okay. We’ll be there. Just text me the details.” Jared would have to show up, whether he wanted to or not.
“Oh, and, Ally?”
I met Sloane’s suddenly reproachful gaze. “Go talk to your sister. She’s worried about you. Now I am too.”
Guilt slashed through me. “I’m fine.”
“That may be … but I’d feel better if you’d stop avoiding Aria.”
“She told you I’m avoiding her?”
Sloane nodded. “She’s really upset.”