Chapter 13
Juliet
Maybe if I keep my eyes closed, Parker won’t know that I’m awake.
I squeeze them shut tighter, thankful that my face is against his chest so he can’t see it.
I even out my breathing, slowing it down.
Maybe, just maybe, he’s still asleep and doesn’t know that I’m currently clutching the front of his shirt, completely nestled against him.
How much of the night did we sleep like this? How did this even happen?
I don’t know the answer to either of those questions, but I do know that I don’t want to move.
And that’s completely terrifying. I should extract myself from his arms and make a funny quip about how it was cold last night and he was warm so I must have naturally gravitated toward him. But I don’t do that.
His arm is heavy around me, but it also feels safe and secure.
Like he wants me tucked in next to him just as much as I want to be here.
But that can’t be right because he doesn’t feel that way about me.
At least, he doesn’t seem to do anything more than surface-level flirting, and that’s only when Axel is around.
But he did smirk and flirt with you even before that, remember the first day?
If it’s possible, I close my eyes even tighter, trying to forget that first day, when he caught me checking him out.
But all I can see is his handsome face, grinning at me like he knew the secret I didn’t even realize I was keeping.
I know you. The words he said yesterday echo through my brain. What if I’m not keeping any secrets and he can see my attraction on my face? What then?
I shift slightly so that I can look at his face. When I open my eyes, he’s already watching me.
“It’s creepy to watch people when they sleep.” Why does it come out all breathy? What the heck is wrong with me?
“Wasn’t watching you. Woke up when you moved.” His voice is deeper, raspier than it normally is. Chills cover my skin and I shiver. He pulls me in closer to him. “Cold?”
“Mm-hm,” I whisper, still staring at him.
If I moved, even a little, I could kiss him right now.
I lick my lips, and his eyes flicker toward the movement then back up to my eyes.
He’s searching, but I’m not sure what for.
Should I kiss him? Would that be weird, or would it be perfect?
When did Parker go from my best friend’s younger brother to someone I want to kiss?
I don’t know, but right now I don’t care.
All I want now is to know how his lips would feel pressed against mine.
For a breath, neither of us move. His heart beat is a steady drum under my hand, making me feel alive and brave all at the same time. My gaze flickers to his lips that look so perfectly kissable. When I look in his eyes a second later, they’re darker than before.
“Jules,” he whispers and my belly dips.
“Morning!” Blair’s voice is loud and harsh against the moment her brother and I are having, but the word does the trick, because we scramble apart, or at least we try to. But we’re tangled in each other and the mountain of blankets I put on the mattress last night. “Well, isn’t this cozy?”
I sit up, which isn’t the best idea, because there’s a blanket wrapped around my shoulder, which is also somehow wrapped around Parker, and he moves forward at the movement, his head nearly landing in my lap, which doesn’t seem physically possible with how we’re tangled together. We both move away from each other.
“What time is it?” I ask, grabbing my phone on the couch. There’s a text from Blair.
Guess you aren’t over that old crush, huh ;)
I drop the phone, which is not mine. My eyes flick toward Parker, whose face is beet red.
“A little after eight. I’m feeling better though; you two want to get ready and we can go get breakfast?” Blair asks.
“Yup,” I say. Is it hot in here? I feel like it’s a million degrees.
But that also could be because my best friend almost walked in on me kissing her brother.
I have got to get a grip. This isn’t a good idea.
He’s attractive, sure. He makes me laugh and he’s the best snuggler.
But that doesn’t mean I can go and fall for him.
How would that even work for us? He lives in Colorado and I live on the other side of the country.
Nope, it’s best that she walked in right before I kissed him.
That would have been bad for all of us if I’d given in to those emotions.
“You and Parker looked pretty cozy together this morning,” Blair says as she grabs more of the shredded white paper that we’re putting into glass ornaments as snow.
Parker said he had some work he needed to do, so he stayed back at the cabin instead of coming to this activity, which hurt more than I want to admit.
“It got cold last night,” I say, stuffing my own ornament with paper. “We must have fallen asleep during the movie.” He must have turned off the TV at some point, because the last thing I remember was the middle of It’s a Wonderful Life.
“That’s your excuse?” Blair scoffs.
“What?”
“Honey, I’d have to be blind not to see that you’re attracted to my brother.”
I gape at her.
“Don’t play dumb,” she says, grabbing a tiny snowman and dropping it into her ornament.
“I saw the way you were practically drooling at him when we first got here, which, frankly, disturbed me at first because, ew, that’s my brother.
But then I started thinking about it, and you know, the two of you would be really cute together. ”
I set down my ornament. “What is going on right now?”
She smiles. “I’m giving you permission to date my brother. I still have to be the number one person in your life, but you can date him.”
“Blair,” I squeak. “I don’t need your permission because I’m not going to date him.”
“I heard you already are.” She smirks and it looks so much like Parker’s half smile that I have to look away.
“That’s not real.” I stare at the fake snow on the table in front of me.
“But you want it to be.”
“How could you possibly know that?” I ask.
“So I’m right, you do want it to be real?”
I groan. “It would never work and you know that. I have my own life in DC; I’m not about to move back to Colorado. I’d never ask him to leave his work. After Christmas, we’ll both be going home. And four days isn’t exactly enough time to decide you want to date someone long distance.”
She claps. “I knew it! And when I saw the two of you this morning, I knew it.”
“What exactly did you know?”
“That you two are meant to be.”
“Since when have you ever believed in anything like that? You’re always telling me that dating isn’t worth it and that I should just enjoy my single life.”
“That was before, when you were getting over Axel. Now we could be sisters, for real.”
My head spins. “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Slow down. I’m fake dating your brother and you’re planning our wedding?”
“You’re getting married?” Axel appears at the table in front of me and my stomach turns sour. If he heard the first part, he’ll know that my relationship is fake.
“No,” I say at the same time as Blair says, “Yes.”
His head swivels between the two of us, settling on me.
There’s hurt in his eyes, which I should ignore, but it makes my heart hurt.
“I didn’t realize you and lover boy were that serious.
Didn’t look all that serious the other day.
I honestly thought you were faking it, just using him as an excuse to make me jealous so I’d be begging you to come back to me by the end of the week. ”
Okay, my heart doesn’t hurt anymore. “It’s real.”
His eyes narrow at me. “Has he proposed?”
“Not yet,” I say with more confidence than I feel. “But we’ve talked about it.” We absolutely have not.
He takes a step closer to me. “Well, we’ll see if he ever does, or if you come running back to me.”
I shiver for the second time today, but this time, it’s because I’m creeped out, not because I want to make out with Parker.
Axel reads this all wrong and gives me a slimy grin. “You’ll see. Save me a dance at the ball. We’ll talk then.” He winks at me before walking off.
“Was he always that creepy and weird?” Blair asks as soon as he’s out of earshot.
“I don’t think so,” I say. “But maybe I just never noticed.”
“You also haven’t ever dated anyone else. For the past two years, he’s always been able to call and you’d be there to pick up. Maybe this is just how he acts when he’s jealous. But it’s still weird. And creepy.”
“Agreed. It’s definitely weird. Hopefully, though, he’ll get the idea that I’m not interested anymore and I’m not someone he can just call when he gets bored in between flings.”
She grins. “Right, cause you’re going to date Parker.”
“Can we please talk about something else?”
“All right, fine. But I’m not dropping this. We’re going to come back to it.”
“You’ve been sick almost the whole time we’ve been here, and you don’t want to hear about the resort at all? Or anything else that doesn’t involve your brother?”
Her eyes light up. “Okay, you’re so right. Tell me everything. How was sledding?”
“That did not happen, way too many people. I kind of freaked, so we watched movies instead.” Shoot. Talking about the resort isn’t going to lead the conversation away from Parker at all since I’ve spent all my time with him.
“You’re thinking about him right now, aren’t you?”
“Shut up.”