Chapter Nine #2
Violet cried all the way home. She’d hoped that Blake really cared about her, that he wanted her for keeps, that he’d be thrilled when he learned about the baby.
But he already knew, God knew how, and he wasn’t thrilled.
He was only marrying her for appearances.
He felt trapped. He didn’t want Violet in any way at all, except perhaps physically. It was a harsh blow.
She stayed in her car until the tears stopped and she was able to act with some sort of normalcy. She checked her eyes in the mirror to make sure they weren’t red. She didn’t want to alarm her mother. About one thing Blake was right: her mother would be horrified if she knew about the baby.
With a forced smile, she called to her mother as she walked in. Mrs. Hardy looked up from her soap opera and waved and smiled absently, going right back to the action on the screen.
It was a reprieve. Violet went into her bedroom and changed into loose jeans and a sweatshirt. She did lay down for a few minutes, certain that her mother wouldn’t be moved by a hurricane until her program went off.
She had to make a decision, and quickly.
She couldn’t hop on a bus and leave town.
It would be impossible to move her mother right now, and not only because of the impending legal problems if Janet Collins was ever found and prosecuted for the death of Violet’s father.
She couldn’t leave because her mother wouldn’t survive being uprooted. She loved Jacobsville.
That being the case, temporarily Violet had only one possible course of action.
She had to get out of Blake’s office. She was uneasy about calling Duke Wright back and going to work for him again, but she didn’t have a list of potential employers.
She wouldn’t be able to hide her pregnancy for a long time, but for several weeks at least she wouldn’t show.
That gave her a little time to make decisions.
She picked up the phone and called her former boss.
* * *
Minutes later, she walked into the living room. The credits were rolling on Mrs. Hardy’s soap opera, and the elderly lady was drying her eyes.
“It was so sad,” she told Violet. “Harry had loved Eunice for years and years, and just when he asked her to marry him, he died of a heart attack.”
“Yes, that’s sad, all right.” She bent and kissed her mother gently. “How are you feeling?”
“I should be asking you that, dear,” she replied with a pointed stare. “You look very pale. Are you all right?”
“I think I’ve picked up a bug,” Violet told her. “I came home early. It was okay with the boss man,” she added with a forced smile. “I’m going to fix something nice for supper.”
“If you like,” Mrs. Hardy said, but she looked worried.
Violet wasn’t about to tell her the rest, that she’d just agreed to go back to work for Duke Wright. Her former employer hadn’t been able to replace her, and he was overjoyed that she was willing to come back.
The only bad thing was that she’d agreed to be in his office Monday. Now she had to tell Blake Kemp that she was leaving again, and why. It made her sick at her stomach even to contemplate it.
* * *
Blake phoned her as soon as he’d pacified his worried client, but Mrs. Hardy answered the phone and said she was sorry, but Violet had gone to bed with a headache. He hung up and went home. But he didn’t sleep.
All night long, his selfishness haunted him.
Violet was sweet and kind, and she loved him.
He could look for the rest of his life and never find a woman half as honest as she was.
Ever since she’d come to work for him, she’d nurtured him, cared for him, to the extent that his heart lifted just at the sight of her in his office.
Since they’d become intimate, his body ached for her night and day.
He knew that he was her first man, that she wanted no one else.
And now she was carrying his child under her heart.
After all that, he’d proposed to her only because he felt an obligation, not because he wanted her or his child.
Now, with his mind finally functioning again, he realized what a lucky man he was. Why had it taken him so long to know it?
He got up before dawn and made himself a big breakfast. He was going to the most exclusive jewelry store in Jacobsville and he was going to buy Violet a diamond so big that it would blind her.
Perhaps he’d felt trapped into proposing before, but he was only beginning to see what a wise thing he’d done.
He was going to make Violet believe that she was the luckiest woman on earth.
He’d bring her flowers, take her to the theater, buy her presents.
He laughed at his own lightheartedness. He’d never felt so happy.
* * *
Violet sat down at her desk, somber and quiet on the following Monday morning. Her demeanor made her co-workers nervous. Especially when she started cleaning out her desk.
Blake walked in the door, smiling.
Violet looked up at him with an expression he couldn’t comprehend.
“What are you doing?” he asked suddenly, when he realized she was putting her things into a cardboard box.
“I’m going back to work for Duke Wright,” she said quietly.
He stood completely still, his mind not working at all as he stared at her, uncomprehending. “You’re quitting, again?” he exclaimed.
She glared at him. “Yes, I’m quitting!”
Mabel and Libby exchanged glances and rose at the same time from their desks. “We’re going over to the bakery for bear claws!” they announced, and ran for it.
“You just came back to work here!” Blake burst out, barely noticing the front door close behind the two women.
“And I’m just leaving!” she said, slamming down a stapler on the desk.
“Why?”
“Why?” she exclaimed. “How can you ask me that? You’re only marrying me because you know about the baby!”
His indrawn breath was all the confirmation she needed.
“Yes,” she said coldly, her anguish in her blue eyes as she looked up at him. “I know, Blake. I heard you talking on the phone.”
Talking on the phone. Talking… His mouth opened as he met her sad eyes. Dusky color tinted his high cheekbones and his teeth clenched. Damn fate for letting her overhear that indelicate conversation with Dr. Lou Coltrain. Why, why, hadn’t he closed the door?
Violet felt her last hope fly away as she saw his guilty expression. He had meant what he said, she thought. He was only marrying her to give their child a name and keep her mother from having a fatal stroke from the shame.
“A lot of marriages start with less than we have,” he said after a minute, choosing his words carefully.
“But we’d have been starting without what matters most, Blake,” she told him. “Love.”
He almost blurted out that she loved him and he knew it. But that would put the last nail in his coffin. He didn’t dare say it.
He drew in a long breath. “I won’t try to stop you,” he said quietly. “If this is what you really want. But I wish you’d reconsider.”
She shook her head. “I don’t want to stay here with you feeling sorry for me and everybody speculating on why.”
“If you leave, you’ll hear plenty of speculating,” he replied with visible impatience.
She turned back to her desk, feeling empty inside. “I can’t stay.”
“Well, don’t expect me to try to stop you,” he replied furiously. “If you’d rather go out there and tell the whole planet that you’re pregnant and you won’t marry the father of your child, be my guest!”
“And that lovely sentiment is exactly why I’m leaving!” she raged. “You aren’t concerned about me, you’re concerned about what people think! Your reputation might be ruined, isn’t that it? You might lose clients!”
His eyes blazed at her. “What about your mother, Violet?” he shot back, seeing the point hit home as she winced. “How is she going to feel when she finds out?”
She bit her lip. “Mama will understand.”
“Think so?” he replied sarcastically. “How about Duke Wright?”
“Excuse me?”
“When you start showing, what is he going to think? And his employees, not to mention his ex-wife!” He glowered at her numb expression. “They’ll think it’s his!”
She gasped. “They…won’t!”
“Bull!”
She glared at him. It was just too much, all at once. She didn’t want to believe what he was saying, but it was the truth. Her face grew redder by the minute.
He glared right back. His eyes narrowed on her thickening waist. His expression changed.
He’d never thought of children. At least, not since Shannon’s death.
Now, he began to wonder what a child of his might look like.
Would it have dark hair like his and Violet’s?
Would it have blue eyes? Would it be a boy, or a little girl?
“You look…odd,” she commented.
“I was thinking about the baby,” he said absently, his eyes still on her waist. “I never really thought about being a father. I’ve been alone most of my adult life.”
“So have I,” Violet confessed.
“What do you want?” he asked, meeting her eyes levelly.
She blinked. “I…haven’t thought about that. Not much anyway.”
He moved a step closer. “What would you like to have?”
She was lost in his eyes. “Little girls are nice,” she ventured. “I like to knit and crochet and quilt. I could…teach her.”
His breath caught. A little girl. He thought about Rey Hart’s little girl.
The family had come to see him about a minor legal matter and Celina came with them.
She was barely six months old, dark-haired and fascinating to Blake.
He’d watched her like a hawk, noting that Rey was a pushover for his daughter, to his wife, Meredith’s, amusement.
The same could be true of Judd Dunn and Christabel’s twins.
Everyone in town was indulgently amused at how easily a tough guy like Judd Dunn was reduced to putty when he held those babies.
“Little girls are nice,” he agreed softly.
“But I wouldn’t mind a boy, either. I like baseball and soccer,” she continued. “I can still bat and catch and kick.”
He smiled. “So can I.”