19. Amanda
Amanda was still reeling. As she sipped her wine and helped console Katie, she could not get her head around the fact that Katie had called Nancy a poisonous bitch.
It was the most shocking thing she had ever witnessed.
She knew Katie was a bit of a live wire, fun, boozy Katie, but to say that to Nancy, and in front of everyone, it was mind-blowing.
If she was being honest, she had thought it about her mother-in-law many, many times, but to say it out loud!
Katie must really have reached the end of her tether.
And then Jamie and Ross fighting like that …
It had been the craziest day. Amanda wondered who would have come out on top if Frank hadn’t intervened.
She reckoned Jamie because he was fitter, but then Ross was taller …
Anyway, thank God it hadn’t got violent.
Mind you, she would probably have enjoyed seeing Ross get a few punches, just medium ones that hurt but didn’t cause actual damage.
As she patted Katie’s back, Amanda was thinking that Katie’s outburst could work in Ross’s favour.
Now, Jamie would be tainted in Nancy’s eyes by his wife’s behaviour and his physical aggression towards Ross.
So, Frank was useless, Jamie had a mad wife and a bad temper, therefore Ross was the obvious heir.
Ross also had a good, sensible wife. A wife who stood by him through thick and (unknown to everyone) very thin.
A wife who cleaned up other people’s messes.
A wife who had scraped Nancy off the bathroom floor.
A loyal, silent wife who, although she wanted to murder him, stayed by Ross’s side and supported him.
Yes, this outburst definitely played in their favour.
She did feel sorry for Katie with regard to Lucy, though. Falling out with your children was horrible – she’d had enough arguments with Theo these past months to know that only too well. She wanted to reassure her. And she greatly appreciated Katie refusing to taint her with Ross’s mean comment.
‘I really wouldn’t worry about Lucy and Nancy’s relationship,’ Amanda said gently, as Katie’s tears subsided. ‘Nancy talks about Lucy a lot, she adores her. To be honest, I wish Nancy would show a scrap of interest in Theo. It’s as if he’s invisible.’
‘Nancy has very little interest in the twins either, or Toby for that matter,’ Melanie remarked.
‘Yes, but we’re living with her. She sees him every day and she still pretty much ignores him.’
‘I wish she’d ignored me all these years instead of poking holes in me,’ Katie said.
‘She’ll ignore you now.’ Melanie chuckled.
Katie half smiled. ‘I’ll be getting the silent treatment until she’s six feet under.’
‘She pokes holes in everyone,’ Amanda pointed out.
Katie poured more wine into her glass and shook her head. ‘No, Nancy has always belittled me more than you two. I’ve always been “just a hairdresser”. I didn’t go to college, I’m not book smart. She’s never rated me. She’s always made me feel that Jamie married down and could have done better.’
‘It’s true. She does do that,’ Melanie agreed. ‘She also kind of forced me to marry Frank.’
‘What?’ Amanda hadn’t been aware of that.
‘Yeah, when I started to work in the agency I was only twenty-two. It was my first job out of college and Nancy pushed me towards Frank and kept encouraging me to date him and then to marry him.’
‘But you fell in love with him,’ Katie reminded her.
Melanie twisted her wine glass around. ‘I did, but he was my first proper boyfriend and I didn’t really know what love was. I was in awe of Nancy and let the momentum carry me along.’
Did she regret marrying Frank? Was that what she was intimating? Amanda glanced at Katie, who shrugged.
‘Well, you all know she thinks I trapped Ross by getting pregnant,’ Amanda admitted, for the first time.
‘I think Ross was lucky to meet you. You’re a saint. If I had to live with Nancy, I’d have called her poisonous bitch a long time ago.’ Katie laughed. ‘And you, Melanie, you work with her every day. I only see her every few weeks and look at what I just did.’
They laughed.
‘I spend most of my time in my office with the door closed and we only ever talk about work, which is fine because I respect Nancy from a professional point of view,’ Melanie told them.
‘I hide in my bedroom when she’s around or go out for long walks,’ Amanda said. It felt good to be honest. It was freeing to confess that she hid in her room because she had nowhere else to go.
‘You guys need to get out of that house. I feel sorry for you and Theo,’ Katie said. ‘I can give you spare keys and you can hang out here while I’m at work if you like. You’re welcome to come and chill out.’
Amanda was touched. It was a thoughtful offer and she was tempted to take Katie up on it, but her love of tidiness and order would probably prevent her from being able to relax.
Katie’s house was messy and chaotic. There was stuff everywhere, toys, coats, bags, shoes, books, magazines, footballs, tennis racquets …
Amanda could never live in such clutter.
She needed everything to be orderly and in its place.
‘Thanks, but hopefully she’ll be back on her feet soon and we can leave. To be fair, she is keen to have the house back to herself, but she’s still unsteady.’
‘I think the fall has aged her a lot,’ Melanie agreed.
‘Pity it didn’t kill her,’ Katie said, then held up her hands. ‘I know, that’s mean to say, but …’
‘How long more do you reckon you’ll have to stay?’ Melanie asked.
‘I’m not sure. I thought she was doing well, but …’
‘But what?’ Katie pounced.
Amanda knew she had promised not to say anything, but it was nice to be able to confide in others. ‘A week ago, Nancy had a fall. I found her in the bathroom, on the floor.’
‘Poor Nancy.’ Melanie looked concerned.
‘Was she naked?’ Katie asked.
Amanda covered her eyes and nodded.
‘ Noooooo! ’ Katie and Melanie said at the same time, then burst out laughing.
‘What did you do?’ Melanie asked.
‘Well, I grabbed a towel and covered her up.’
‘I almost feel sorry for her,’ Katie said. ‘But I feel really sorry for you.’
‘It was … awkward,’ Amanda admitted.
‘Awkward? It was a horror show! You could have gone blind looking at that.’ Katie giggled.
Amanda began to laugh. It felt so good to laugh about it. It felt good to laugh in general. How long was it since she’d had a chat and a laugh?
‘Stop!’ Melanie said. ‘I can’t get the image out of my mind now.’
‘Look, please don’t tell Jamie or Frank, though, okay? I haven’t even told Ross, because Nancy asked me not to and I respect that. She doesn’t want to look weak.’
Melanie took off her glasses and rubbed her eyes. ‘There’s no way I’d tell Frank. He’d be straight over with alternative therapies and motivational quotes.’
Katie and Amanda giggled.
‘I love Frank dearly, but his quotes can be a bit much,’ Katie said. ‘Do you know what he told me when I broke my arm last year and couldn’t work? He said, “We don’t heal in isolation but in community.” I had no idea what he was on about.’
Amanda laughed. ‘He sent a card to Nancy that said, “The wound is the place where the light reaches you.” Nancy put it into the bin.’
Melanie groaned. ‘His latest one to try to get me to work fewer hours is “Time is the coin of your life. It is the only coin you have, and only you can determine how it will be spent.” I mean, give me strength.’
‘He’s all goodness, our Frank,’ Katie said loyally. ‘He’s obviously got his dad’s genes.’
‘True. I think Jamie is a mixture of the two, kind but also driven,’ Melanie said. ‘What about Ross?’
Amanda paused. What was Ross? A selfish bastard?
A thoughtless prick? A cheating scumbag?
She desperately wanted to share her secret and her pain with her sisters-in-law, but she was afraid.
If she told them, they’d tell their husbands, and they could use it against Ross.
He had, after all, had an inappropriate affair with one of his authors – not to mention the pregnancy.
No, that was a secret she needed to keep.
‘I think Ross is a mixture of his mum and dad,’ she fudged.
‘What’s his dad like?’ Katie asked.
‘I’ve only met him a few times. He’s nice enough.
I’d say pretty selfish, though. He’s all about his second family and he treats Ross more like an acquaintance than a son.
He never really got to know Ross. After the break-up with Nancy, Ross was dumped in boarding school, Thomas moved to France, met Céline and had three daughters with her. ’
‘That’s really sad. Poor Ross. It’s no wonder he’s … well, a bit tricky,’ Katie said.
‘I think the three of them are a bit messed up, to be honest,’ Melanie said.
Katie poured some crisps into a bowl and pushed them into the middle of the counter.
‘Jamie’s the most normal in my opinion, and, yes, I know I’m biased. Mind you, he’ll probably divorce me after today.’
The thing was, though, Jamie adored Katie and she adored him right back.
That was easy to see. They had the most solid marriage by far.
Amanda envied them their closeness – they were two peas in a pod.
They also seemed to have fun together: they went out partying and drinking and dancing.
Melanie and Frank, on the other hand, never seemed to spend any time together – even at work.
But their lives were so tied up with the agency and Nancy being Melanie’s boss that it would be very complicated for them to split up.
No, Amanda thought, the couple in real crisis was her and Ross.
Katie went to pour them more wine, but Amanda put a hand over her glass. She’d had enough. She knew if she drank any more she’d blab all her secrets to these women. She needed to keep her head straight.
Melanie said no to more wine too, so Katie poured the end of the bottle into her glass.
‘I think maybe you’ve had enough. The wine was what got you into trouble. We’re all a lot more honest when we drink,’ Melanie said, blunt as ever.
‘You’re probably right, but the damage is done and now I need to anaesthetize myself,’ Katie said, taking a long sip.
Melanie stood up. ‘I’d better go. I have to prepare for a meeting tomorrow.’
‘Everyone seemed so impressed with that Petrus guy. He must be a big hitter,’ Katie said.
‘He’s one of the most highly regarded writers in the world,’ Amanda said.
Katie shrugged. ‘I don’t know much about writers, but well done, Melanie.’
‘He’s handsome too,’ Amanda said, with a grin.
‘Oooh, now I’m interested. Show me.’
Amanda googled him and held up her phone to show Katie.
‘ Niiiiiiiice. He’s fit in a geeky-sexy writer kind of way. Does Frank have to be worried, Melanie?’
Melanie laughed. ‘It’s a bonus that he’s easy on the eye, but it’s his writing that impresses me.’
‘I still fancy the pants off Jamie. No one else could come close.’
Melanie said nothing. Amanda wondered if she even had sex with Frank.
She couldn’t imagine it. Did she still find Ross attractive?
It was hard to tell because she was so angry with him.
They’d always had a good sex life, though.
They’d moved on from the ripping-each-other’s- clothes-off sex to regular sex and it had been good.
It was what made the betrayal so much worse.
He was ‘getting action’ at home. He wasn’t ‘deprived of sex’.
Since she’d found out about the affair, she hadn’t let him near her.
He’d tried a few times, but she couldn’t bear him to touch her.
‘Frank and I haven’t had sex in years,’ Melanie admitted suddenly.
‘What?’ Katie was shocked.
Amanda wasn’t. It made sense.
Melanie shrugged. ‘We just got out of the habit. I work late, and, well, it just fizzled.’
‘When you say years, how long are we talking?’ Katie asked.
Melanie thought about it. ‘Two, maybe three.’
‘Melanie! You have to get back in the saddle,’ Katie urged her.
‘I know, but it’s almost been so long that I don’t know how. To be honest, I don’t really miss it. Is that bad?’
‘Yes! Sex is good for you. Orgasms give you a high and it keeps you close to your partner.’
‘You’re eight years younger than me. I was having sex eight years ago,’ Melanie defended herself.
Katie put a hand on Melanie’s arm. ‘Melanie, I hear stories all day long from women in my salon. If the sex dries up, the marriage will too. You’re not seventy! I bet you and Ross have sex,’ Katie said, turning to Amanda.
Amanda shuffled uncomfortably in her seat. This was not a conversation she wanted to have. But her sisters-in-law were staring at her. She needed to say something.
‘We go through phases. Generally we’re pretty regular, but lately … well …’
‘Living with Nancy would put the brakes on anyone’s sex drive.’ Katie smiled. ‘Imagine your headboard banging and Nancy telling you to keep it down.’
Amanda laughed, grateful for the distraction. Thankfully, before anyone could ask her any more personal questions, Jamie came back from his run. Melanie and Amanda headed off quickly, leaving Katie to talk to her husband about Poisonous Bitch Gate.