Chapter 35
CHAPTER THIRTY-FIVE
Trina
It took a lot of courage to go over there and confront Scott. As I stood at his door, my heart was beating out of my chest and my stomach was in knots, but I had to do it. I had to find out what happened that day that led to us breaking up.
I tried to let it go. Ever since it happened, I told myself to forget it, not worry about it. But I couldn’t do it. My mind kept going over it, again and again, trying to figure out what set him off. It was like he flipped a switch and we went from everything being great to it being over.
So I finally confronted him, and what did he say? That he wasn’t himself that day. I know it’s a lie, but he won’t tell me the truth.
A text pops up on my phone. It’s from Scott and reads, Come up to the storage room. I’ll explain when you get here.
Why does he want me to go to the storage room? Why can’t he just come here and tell me whatever he needs to say?
Curious what he’s up to, I go to the second floor and find him in the storage room, sitting on one of the boxes. There’s another one next to him.
“Hey,” he says when he sees me. “Have a seat.”
“What is this about?” I ask, sitting on the box.
“What you said earlier. You were right. I owe you an explanation for why I reacted the way I did.”
“Yeah? So what is it?”
He reaches over to a shelf and picks up a piece of paper. It’s the sketch I asked him about that day. The one of the inflatable chair.
“The person who did this,” he says, handing me the sketch. “Her name was Megan. She was my fiancé.”
“Wait—what?” I look at Scott. “You were engaged?”
He stares down at the floor. “We met in college. Got engaged after we graduated. Bought a house.” He pauses. “We were supposed to get married a few weeks after her trip. It was her bachelorette party. She and her bridesmaids went on a ski trip in Utah.”
As I’m listening to this, I’m still trying to process that Scott was engaged. I try to keep up with the story, but I’m getting worried the more he talks. Why is he using the past tense? What happened to this girl? Why isn’t he still with her?
“Megan loved to ski, and she was really good at it. Way better than me. I didn’t even think to worry about her when she went on the trip. I kissed her goodbye, told her to have fun and that I’d see her in a few days.” He clears his throat. “I got a call the next day from the hospital. They said she’d lost control on the slopes and hit a tree.” He shakes his head. “I still don’t understand it. Why she lost control. Her friends said it looked like she hit a patch of ice, but I don’t think that was it. I’ll never know what really happened, which makes it even worse.”
He pauses, still staring at the floor. I almost don’t want him to finish the story. It’s too awful. I’m sure it’s even worse for him, having to say it.
“She was gone by the time the paramedics got there. The doctor I spoke to said it was too late for them to do anything.” He wipes his eyes and takes a breath. “They flew her body back and we had a ceremony later that week.”
I wait to see if he’s going to say anything more. When he doesn’t, I turn to him and put my hand on his arm. “I’m so sorry, Scott. I had no idea.”
“I don’t tell many people this. I don’t like talking about it. But I owed you an explanation for why I got so angry when you asked about that sketch.” He takes it from me. “This is the first one she did. It was also our first product.”
“ Our ? So you started the company together?”
“I started it, but it never would’ve existed if it weren’t for her. She encouraged me to do it. Or more like pushed me. She wouldn’t let it go. She’d leave the sketches everywhere I went to remind me that I needed to start the company. I told her it’d never happen. That I’d never do it.”
“But you did.”
“Because Megan wouldn’t let me give up. She knew I’d make the company a success. She believed in me more than I ever believed in myself.” Scott glances at me. “Sometimes that’s all it takes. Someone who believes in you. That’s why I do what I’m doing now. Half my job working with young entrepreneurs is convincing them they can do it. Making them believe in themselves.” He sets the sketch back on the shelf. “That’s basically it. What I wanted to tell you.”
“I don’t know what to say. I kind of feel like I don’t know you, like there’s this whole other side of you I didn’t know was there.”
“It’s not there. Not anymore. The person I was back in California is gone. I’m not that guy anymore.”
“Is that why you moved here? To get away from the memories you had with her?”
He nods.
“This is why you don’t want a relationship,” I say, finally putting it together. “You still love her.”
“I’ll always love her,” he mutters, like he’s saying it more to himself than to me.
I never had a chance with him. His heart belongs to someone else. She may be gone, but he still holds on to what they had. She was his forever love. There will never be another.
I thank him for telling me, then get up and leave. I finally have an explanation, but hearing it made me feel worse, not better. I feel terrible for Scott, knowing want he’s been through and how it’s affected him. He’ll never love anyone again, which is sad. Even though we’re not together, I care about Scott and want him to be happy, but I’m not sure that he is. He loves what he does and he has a lot of friends, but he’ll never have a wife, or a family. Is he really okay with that, or just saying he is because he won’t let himself have it?
That night, after I get off work, Asher calls and asks if I’ll go out with him tomorrow. He wants to take me to Sunday brunch, which he knows I love, then on a walk through the park to see the fall leaves, another thing I love. He’s trying really hard to win me back, but what happens if he does? Will he go back to how he used to be? Ignoring me and taking me for granted?
I agree to go out with him. I want to believe he’s changed, but I’ll only know that if I spend time with him. I can’t say I’m excited about our date, but that’s because I keep comparing Asher to Scott. When I imagine myself with Asher, it just doesn’t feel the same as when I imagine myself with Scott.
Everything felt different with him, in a good way, like the world was somehow brighter. That may sound strange, but it’s the best way to describe how I felt, like everything was brighter.
It’s not like that with Asher, but that doesn’t mean our relationship couldn’t be good. We just have to work harder at it. And unlike Scott, Asher wants this. He wants a relationship and wants to get married. He’s ready for that. Scott’s not, and never will be.
Maybe it’s time to forgive Asher and give him another chance. I could move back in with him and see how it goes.
I’ll always have a place in my heart for Scott, but I have to move on. He belongs to someone else, someone who’s no longer here. And I don’t see him ever letting her go.