Chapter 28
I wake just before four in the morning with a dry mouth and a pounding head.
I try to lose myself in sleep again, and when I wake up properly for the day, it’s gone eight o’clock, which is unheard of.
Dot wakes just after me, and we both groan.
The light is too bright and my mouth feels like something died in it.
‘It’s just a hangover,’ Erin says when we’ve ventured downstairs. ‘I’ll sort you out.’
She brings us big glasses of water with tablets fizzing in them.
‘What’s this?’ I ask.
‘Berocca. It will help you rehydrate. Sip it, don’t gulp. Little and often. Toast to follow.’
I haven’t had a hangover in years, but perhaps we did overdo it a bit celebrating Julie’s sister’s birthday. Everyone was in high spirits, Kirsty topping up the glasses at an astonishing rate.
‘What time are Sean and Hayley coming?’ I ask Dot, hoping it’s in the afternoon but knowing, deep down, that it’s not.
‘Ten-thirty,’ Dot says with a wince.
We feel better after we’ve had showers and toast. And when they arrive and Erin wastes no time in telling them that we’re hungover, Sean thinks it’s hilarious. He claps his hands, and I want to ask him to please not make so much noise.
‘Nanna, I never thought I’d see the day!’
Hayley follows him in, looking around the room and exclaiming over everything. ‘Is this you, Mabel? How old are you here? You look so beautiful!’
We’re going to look at venues today. That’s why they’re here, Sean and Hayley.
She says we can discuss almost everything over video calls but local venues are the one thing she needs to be here with us for.
She’s been looking at places online, getting availability and prices.
She’s made a shortlist, and now we’re going to see them.
In the car, Dot and I sit side by side in the back seat, hands held, and we listen to Sean and Hayley’s stories.
Sean tells us about his friend who managed to lock himself out on his balcony wearing nothing but his pants and at one point he’s laughing so hard I think we might have to pull over.
In turn, Hayley tells us about some of the clients she’s had over the years.
She’s seen all sorts, notably a groom who found out his husband had done the dirty on him on the day and threw the entire cake at him, and a bride’s mother who wore a white gown and said if there were two brides, she didn’t see the problem.
I love a good story, but there’s part of me that’s holding back, wondering whether Dot and I will become an anecdote that she tells future clients.
You wouldn’t believe how old they were! Go on, have a guess.
Dot says I’m quiet.
‘I’m just taking it all in,’ I say, gesturing to the window, even though there’s nothing to see but other cars and motorway.
The first stop is a barn on a dairy farm.
You can get married almost anywhere these days, especially if you’re not actually doing the legal bit.
I wouldn’t have thought of this. I suppose that’s where someone like Hayley comes in.
We’re shown around by a neat-looking woman in her forties, and if she’s surprised to meet two brides in their eighties, she hides it well.
She talks about fairy lights and flowers, about how the team will move the rows of chairs and bring in circular tables while we’re having photographs taken.
‘I’ll leave you to have a wander around,’ the woman says. ‘I’ll be just outside if you have any questions.’
‘Can you picture it?’ Hayley asks as soon as the woman has walked away.
I look around the barn, which is clean but empty, and try to imagine the things she talked about, showed us photos of. All our loved ones here. Dot in her beautiful dress, and me in… well, I don’t know yet.
‘I think so,’ I say.
‘I’m not sure it’s really us,’ Dot says.
And I’m so glad she’s said it, because I feel the same way, something making me hold back. I smile, and Hayley sees it.
Hayley throws her arms up. ‘Well, that’s absolutely fine. It’s just a first venue, a starting point. I’ll tell her we’ve seen what we need to and we’ll move on.’
Next, she takes us to a restaurant in the countryside. It’s about the right size, and the restaurant manager shows us photos of other weddings they’ve hosted.
‘Are you the bride?’ he asks Hayley, and she bursts into raucous laughter.
‘We’re the brides,’ Dot says, linking her arm through mine.
He gives us a puzzled look, and I wonder whether something’s lost in translation. He has a strong Spanish accent.
‘Is there a problem?’ Hayley asks.
‘No, no problem,’ he says, recovering himself. ‘We’re just more aimed towards a younger clientele.’
I’d thought it was the fact that we’re both women that he was unsure about, but it’s our age.
‘We won’t waste any more of your time, then,’ I say, inclining my head to suggest that we should make our way out.
Sean puts both hands up in a placatory gesture. ‘You don’t think we should have a proper look around, while we’re here?’
Hayley’s eyes are on us. She’s telling us the decision is ours. And I already know that I won’t be getting married here, with this judgemental man in charge.
‘I don’t think so,’ I say. ‘Do you, Dot? Besides, we’ve chosen a caterer. If we have it at a restaurant, we won’t be able to use them.’
Dot shakes her head. ‘We’ll be off,’ she says, and I love her for supporting me. For supporting us.
Outside, we get back in the car, and I realise I’m feeling weary.
‘How many more?’ I ask.
Sean is reversing out of the parking space and Hayley turns around to face us in the back seat.
‘Have you had enough? It is a bit exhausting, all this. I’m so sorry about him, too. There’s just no way of knowing who’s an arsehole when you’re looking through websites, unfortunately. Anyway, it’s just one more, and it’s much closer to home than these two.’
I like the sound of closer to home. Of not having to travel far on the day, not having far to go home at the end of it.
Sean drives us into Overbury, and we park in a multi-storey car park.
Hayley leads us down the high street, talking animatedly about how this one is a bit of a gamble, quite different from the places we’ve seen so far.
‘It’s a bit bigger, but it’s actually the cheapest of the three, and I think there’s a chance you’ll recognise it.’ She’s beaming, her face pure joy.
Dot gives me a curious look but I think I know where we’re going.
And I’m right. Hayley takes us to a grand old building that’s plastered with posters for bingo and comedy nights, and Sean raises his eyebrows in surprise.
But when I glance across at Dot, there’s a spark in her eyes that I haven’t seen since before.
Since this was a place we frequented all the time.
‘Well?’ Hayley asks, spreading her arms wide as if presenting something she’s made.
‘What is this place?’ Sean asks. ‘It doesn’t look very you, Nanna.’
But Dot and I are already going inside, and Sean has to catch us up.
‘This used to be a dance hall,’ I say. ‘Dot and I used to come here every Saturday night, with Bill and Arthur.’
We wait in the entrance hall for the person Hayley’s been talking to, who’s going to show us around. When she appears, she’s not what I expected. She’s very young, not yet thirty, I’d guess, and she has a welcoming smile and a loud voice.
‘This must be Mabel and Dot,’ she says, coming towards us with her arms outstretched. She hugs us, kissing our cheeks, and then she does the same to Hayley and Sean for good measure. ‘I’m Jade.’
Without further ado, she flings open the double doors and for a moment it’s all I can do to stand still as the rush of memories threatens to flood me.
It’s shabbier, older, of course, but then, so are we.
But if I squint, or take my glasses off, I could be back there, when we were young and didn’t know enough about love to grab hold of it.
I feel Dot reach for my hand and it’s almost shocking, like it would have been back then.
‘We’d clear out all of this,’ Jade says, gesturing to the long tables that look like they’re set up for bingo. ‘And then we’d bring in tables and chairs for food but there’d still be plenty of space for dancing. How many guests are we thinking?’
Hayley must sense that Dot and I are a little stunned, so she steps in to answer Jade’s questions. ‘About fifty, we think,’ she says. ‘I know you can cater for a lot more, but I really wanted to show them this place, because I think it’s somewhere they used to come many years ago.’
‘When it was a dance hall?’ Jade asks, looking delighted.
I nod. ‘In the 1950s. How did you know?’ I ask, turning to Hayley.
Her skin goes a bit pink and I’m surprised. I don’t know her well, but I think of her as being full of confidence.
‘Dot mentioned something in passing when we were talking about how you met. I did a bit of sleuthing and found out that Overbury Dance Hall is now, well, this place.’
I’m strangely moved by the trouble she’s gone to. I wasn’t sure, at first, about having a wedding planner, particularly because it might not be a legal wedding, more a statement. But now we’re here, in a building I haven’t been inside for years – decades – and it’s just right.
‘We have some old photos somewhere,’ Jade says. ‘I’ll have to dig them out. A small group is fine. What we sometimes do is curtain off one side of the room, so it doesn’t look cavernous. Anyway, have a look around and if you have questions, just fire them my way.’
Photos. Is there a chance that we would be in any of them?
Perhaps. We were regulars, after all. But I don’t think I want to see them, either way.
Because I want to dance here with Dot, and that’s not what I’ll see if my younger self was captured by a photographer’s lens.
I don’t want to see my brother Bill, the way he looked at Dot, the way it looked so obvious, how it was all going to pan out between the four of us.
I look at Dot, really look at her. ‘What do you think?’ I ask.
‘It would be quite something, wouldn’t it? We could bring a band in, get them to play all the old songs we loved.’
I put one arm around her and hold my other hand up, and she takes my hand, puts her other hand on my shoulder.
And then we’re dancing, no music, just our bodies and our hearts, and I feel like I could burst with happiness.
We’re slow and unsteady and there’s nothing elegant about our movements, but I’m back at the dance hall with Dot in my arms and I never thought my life would bring me to this moment.
When we break apart, a little out of breath, we are both smiling from ear to ear. Dot leans forward and kisses me, and then we go over to where Hayley and Sean are standing with Jade.
‘This is the place,’ I say.
Sean is wiping away a tear and Hayley looks a bit misty-eyed, too. Young love is wonderful, but old love shouldn’t be dismissed.
‘That’s absolutely wonderful,’ Jade says, clapping her hands. ‘Hayley and I have already talked about dates, but would you like to go through costings and all the details now? Or I could email it all across for you to look through at your leisure.’
Hayley decides for us, and I’m so glad she does. ‘Let’s talk over email. I think it’s time we got these two home.’
There are a flurry of goodbyes and then we’re back out on the street and I feel like we’ve done something magical, like we’ve stepped back into our pasts before being shot out into the present again.
On the street, people are walking by, talking on their mobile telephones or joking with friends, and inside my heart, a fire has been lit.
Dot and me, in one another’s arms, in the place where it all began.
The place where we longed to dance together, but couldn’t.
It feels like we’re taking back control. Like we’re putting things right.