Chapter 48
48
The dinner bell chimed, slicing through the nothingness of sleep. I pushed my face into the pillow. Jonah shifted behind me.
“Should we go?” he asked.
“Yeah.” I sat up, reluctant to leave our cozy cot. I definitely felt better with a few hours’ sleep. My head, while still sore, didn’t feel like a wide-open wound.
Jonah gazed up at me, his expression serious.
“What?” I asked.
“Nothing.” He smiled slightly. “You’re cute.”
“So are you.” I leaned down, hesitated. He pulled me in and kissed me. The world slowed down, until…
Clang!
“We’d better go.” He sat up. “Steven should be back by now. You all packed?”
“I am. Except for my diary.” The words made me suddenly sad. I was going to have to leave that part of myself behind here, apparently.
“I’m sorry.”
“It is what it is.” I sighed. “Are you bringing your stuff to the lobby?”
“I’ll wait. Don’t want to piss them off by seeming too eager.” He rolled his eyes, then pulled me in for one more kiss.
“Welcome!” Sol cried as Jonah and I entered the dining room. “Grace made her famous lasagna. It’s incredible. Good for hangovers too.”
I glanced at the others: Moon, smiling and animated. Catherine, staring down at her plate. Grace, calmly cutting clean stripes into the huge, steaming pan. Several bottles of red wine waited in the middle of the table; the sight made my stomach turn.
“Where’s Steven?” I asked.
“Oh, I’m sure he’ll be back soon.” Sol shrugged.
“He’s still not back?” I exchanged a glance with Jonah.
Sol straightened. “I didn’t want to say anything, but I wouldn’t be surprised if he stopped to see Talia.”
Moon, Grace, and Catherine all whipped their heads to look at him.
“Didn’t you say she was traveling?” I asked when no one said anything.
“No.” Sol stood to grab a wine bottle. “She left, to tell you the truth. Lives in a nearby town.”
Moon’s expression was suddenly thunderous. “Babe, please shut the fuck up.”
“Sorry, babe.” He shrugged, unbothered. “It’s the truth. Steven misses her, you know.”
“So when is he getting here?” My body was on high alert. It struck me that I really had expected Steven to come back, to show up at the appointed time. The fact that he was still gone made my anxiety skyrocket. Where was he? Was he okay?
“I’m sure he’ll be back any minute.” Sol took a plate from Grace. “Right?”
“Right.” Moon smiled softly, suddenly back to her baseline equanimity. “We can count on him, Thea. Don’t you worry.”
There was another empty chair.
“Where’s Karen?” I asked as Grace set a plate of lasagna in front of me. The garlic, basil, and tomato smell and oozing cheese made me suddenly ravenous.
“She’s not feeling too well.” Moon shrugged. “She might join us for the session, but we’ll have to see.”
“The session?”
“Of course.” Moon’s eyebrows dipped. “You didn’t think we were going to stop our sessions just because you were leaving, did you?”
“But now that you’re here, you can participate.” Sol smiled, a drip of red at the corner of his lip.
“If you’d like.” Moon shot him a sharp look.
“Um…” Something was definitely off. About Steven still missing. About the others’ reaction to Sol mentioning Talia. And about Catherine sitting there like she was shell-shocked.
“We weren’t planning on it.” Jonah squeezed my knee.
“It’s totally up to you.” Moon shrugged. “This session is really for Grace, anyway.”
“What do you mean?” The cheese burned the roof of my mouth, but I couldn’t stop myself from wolfing it down.
“It’s an amends.” Moon took the wine from Sol, poured herself a big glass. “For what she did last time.”
“You mean…”
“As the sorcerer.” Moon gave me a tight smile, as if she was tired of explaining it. She stood and leaned to pour me a glass, which I wasn’t planning on touching. She then poured one for Jonah, who took a sip.
My mind spun as Sol and Moon kept up the chatter throughout dinner. Grace seemed perfectly normal, smiling and even ribbing Sol at points.
This session had to do with the conversation I’d overheard. Didn’t it?
Sol’s voice arose in my head: You’re the bravest person I ever met. No one would’ve expected that you’d be able to do this. The others, they think you’re a coward. But I know what you’re capable of.
This was it, then. The thing that Grace’s body was telling her to be afraid to do.
“We’ll attend.” I pushed my leg into Jonah’s. “Wouldn’t miss it.” After all, Jonah held the trump card: a gun. If anything started happening that didn’t feel right, we’d be able to stop it.
Even my worst fear—getting trapped down there—wouldn’t happen. Not with a gun that could help us bust through a flimsy wooden door.
“Great.” Moon beamed at me.
Catherine looked up at me. She hadn’t touched her food. Her eyes were still deadened, exhausted. But now they also looked sad.
“You sure you want to do this?” Jonah asked. We were in the courtyard. Everyone else—barring Steven and Karen—was down in the cave. The square of the sky above was deepening into a royal blue as the sun set, the stars already shining bright. For a second I was reminded of the end of Stargirl : Thuya on a spaceship, getting ready to take revenge on the queen. Had Catherine dreamed that part too?
“Yeah.” I forced myself to focus. “You have the… thing, right?”
He lifted his baggy sweatshirt; there it was, holstered to his belt. It looked fake, like a stage prop. I had the sudden urge to grab it, just to know what it’d feel like in my hands. He let his shirt drop.
“Do you think this is, like, dangerous?” I asked. “Like, where is Steven?”
“I don’t know.” He shook his head. “Look, we can skip this session if you feel weirded out.”
“I do. But that’s why I want to go to it. I don’t want anything bad to happen to Grace. Or Catherine.” I glanced at the sculpture of the woman’s eyeless face and shivered.
“What do you think will happen?”
“I don’t know. But she sounded scared, Jonah. About this ‘amends’ or whatever Moon called it.” I paused. “And why aren’t Moon and Sol doing fucking amends? They’re the ones that supposedly killed Catherine and me, right?”
“Good question.” He shrugged. “Maybe they’re planning to do them too. Maybe they already have. Who knows how this works. We really don’t need to be a part of it.”
“No. We need to keep an eye on Grace and Catherine.” I headed towards the purple door. Inside the room, the door to the stone steps yawned open. Two battery-operated lanterns waited for us at the edge.
I stopped above the hole and took a deep breath. The cold, musty air enveloped me. But this time I felt stronger. I knew what was down there. I knew Catherine was alive. I knew Jonah could protect us.
So I started down the steps.
Everyone was at the far end of the larger cavern. They sat in a circle, their lanterns beside them. Jonah and I started down the sloping, rocky floor. With the lanterns hanging over our arms, it was easier going than last time, trying to navigate the damp darkness with a flashlight. But I was still careful about where I stepped, avoiding the tiny pools.
As we got closer, it smelled like incense. Moon was fluttering a white feather over a bowl to blow the smoke towards people.
“Hey!” She grinned as we approached. “You made it!”
They were uncomfortably close to the hole. The burbling noises made me shudder.
“We did!” The words felt anachronistic, like we’d swung by a housewarming. I was glad I’d worn several layers; it was even colder than I remembered.
Moon directed the bowl’s smoke at my face and down to my ankles. She did the same to Jonah. “There. Now you can join the circle.”
I avoided looking at the hole, but saw the flash of white: the sculpture of Catherine’s head was still there on the little altar. I never had found out who’d made it. There were two empty cushions between Catherine and Sol. I took the seat by Catherine, who was staring miserably down at her lap.
Grace smiled; her hair was loose over her shoulders, and she was wearing the same floaty white dress Moon had worn the first night of the retreat. For some reason, it creeped me out. I looked towards the entrance of the cavern. In the dark, I couldn’t even see the tunnel out. Had it been the right choice, coming down here? Witnessing whatever was planned?
“Tonight, we’re here to rectify a mistake.” Moon sat across from me, pushing up the sleeves of her slouchy sweater. “For a long time, we thought Catherine and Grace were the priestesses. And that cost us, didn’t it? Of course, everything happens for a reason. Catherine had to end up in New York to meet Thea. But still, that doesn’t excuse Grace’s lies.”
“I’m sorry.” Grace looked down into her lap.
“We’re not surprised.” Moon laughed. “After all, the sorcerer deceives, right? That’s who she is. That’s her nature.”
Even in the dim light, I could see Grace’s cheeks redden. I didn’t like this: Grace being blamed for not knowing her role in a play that Moon had made up.
“Because Grace pretended to be the other sister, we wasted time and energy. We went ahead with a ceremony we never should have embarked on. We sacrificed the wrong person.”
What?
“Wait, who did you sacrifice?” I asked, cutting into Moon’s monologue.
“Me.” Catherine said it in a small, childlike voice.
“But because it was the wrong person, the portal sent her back,” Moon went on. “Catherine rose from the dead. It’s a miracle that hasn’t happened for thousands of years.”
“Rose from the dead?” I tried to exchange a scared look with Jonah, but he was gazing at Moon. “What are you talking about?”
Catherine’s shoulders shook; was she crying? I couldn’t tell behind the curtain of hair. Goose bumps sprang up on my arms.
“And tomorrow,” Moon went on, ignoring me. “When light and dark are balanced, the rightful savior will fulfill her sacrifice. She’ll bring the world back towards equilibrium, exponentially increasing good. She’ll shrink the evil that has overtaken men’s hearts, the greed that allows them to kill.” Moon’s breath was ragged, and she paused to swallow. “Tonight, Grace will vanquish the evil that lives within her. She will go through the portal first and prepare the way for our priestess. She will magnify Thea’s great sacrifice with her own.”
“Stop.” I stood, knowing that something was wrong, that we were barreling towards a place with no return. Then everyone else stood in tandem, including Jonah.
Suddenly, Sol was by my side, his hand heavy on my shoulder. “You okay?”
I jumped up and pulled away from him. “I’m leaving.”
Sol’s hand returned to my arm, tightened. “I think you should stay.”
His grip was viselike, and I cried out.
Jonah was already stepping closer, confused. “What’s wrong?”
“Sol—let me go!” Couldn’t Jonah see? Why wasn’t he helping me?
But instead, Jonah gripped my other arm, even more tightly than Sol. My entire body went cold as if dunked in ice water. Now Jonah looked straight ahead, ignoring me.
No. This wasn’t happening. Jonah wasn’t—
“It’s okay, Thea.” Sol sounded faintly irritated, like I was killing the vibe. “Just cool it.”
My voice returned. “Stop!” I tried to pull away, but they were both too strong, their fingers pressing deep into my flesh. It felt like something was unraveling, the solidity of Jonah, of who he was to me, disintegrating into dust.
“Please,” I cried, now desperately trying to wrench out of their grip. The more I struggled, the harder they clamped. Terror filled my body with energy; I felt like I could detach my arms, leave them behind.
“I wish you’d skipped this session.” Finally, Jonah was looking at me. His eyes looked dull and tired. “We could’ve had one more night.”
I gaped at him, speechless once again.
“Aww, that’s sweet.” Sol chuckled. “And I agree. She’s a partier. Who knows what shenanigans we could’ve gotten into?”
“Would you both shut the fuck up?” Moon stood by Grace, an arm around her shoulder. “This is a very important ceremony.”
“Help me!” I turned my pleas to the rest of the group. But Catherine was sobbing into her hands, and Grace was staring determinedly at the ground. “Someone, please, help!”
“Thea!” Moon’s voice was sharp. “You’ll have your time tomorrow. Could you please give Grace the attention she deserves?”
In response, I screamed. It did nothing; Sol and Jonah continued to grip me as if I were a piece of furniture they had to secure in place. I screamed again, unable to stop, the horror bubbling up my throat.
“For fuck’s sake.” Moon bent to pick up a scarf she’d originally unwound from around the incense bowl. Though I pressed my lips together, she managed to stuff it into my mouth.
“I told you we should have the zip ties ready.” Sol’s voice was cold.
“I didn’t realize she’d act this way.” Moon gave me a pointed look, then turned. “Grace, you ready?”
“Yes.” Grace ran her hand over Catherine’s head, petting her. “It’s okay, Cath. I’ve been manipulating people my whole life. This is my chance to make it right.” She approached me, her wide blue eyes determined. “It’s an honor to open the portal for you, Thea. Thank you for your sacrifice.” She touched my shoulder, then turned and walked towards the hole where the rocky wall met the ground. Moon followed, holding a lantern aloft.
I yelled, the scarf muffling my words. I struggled anew, no longer feeling the bright pain from Sol and Jonah’s grip. I knew then what was going to happen. What I should’ve known all along.
Grace walked carefully to the edge, her back to us. The slurping sounds seemed to get louder, as if straining to suck her in.
“Grace, stop! No!” My yells came out as garbled moans, a weird and inconsequential soundtrack to the proceedings.
Grace looked back, somber and scared. But then her eyes trained on someone—Sol, right next to me—and a rapturous smile pulled at her lips.
“No!”
She turned back and jumped. Catherine shrieked once, the piercing crack echoing around the chamber. The crown of Grace’s head was the last to disappear: a flash of tangerine, and she was gone.