16. Renzo
M eeting Giulia in this clandestine manner wasn’t smart, but nothing could keep me away from her. Seeing her reaction to Isabella’s mandate that she marry Nickolas was difficult. I saw how she’d flinched, as though she were hit. I bit my lip and stayed hidden when the mother tried to slap her for insubordination. As she grew quiet and pensive, I worried she was sinking into a pit of despair.
Fuck, Giulia. You can’t marry that bastard.
I disliked the idea of her marrying anyone, but I knew that was a ridiculous sentiment to hang on to. Of course, she’d need to marry someone sooner or later. I simply hated that it could be him .
I climbed back up into her room, glad for the weeping willow branches that surrounded her end of the mansion. It made it easier for me to scale the trellis then reach for her balcony.
She was waiting there, frantic and impatient. Grabbing my hands, she tugged me inside her room. Then once she’d closed and locked the glass doors, she guided me into her bathroom.
“What are you doing?”
The shower ran, but no steam collected.
“I can’t risk anyone hearing us,” she explained. The running-water trick was an old one, but it would mask our conversation if anyone lurked in the hallway.
“And now that she’s over her ‘mourning’ period and no longer wants the world to believe she’s ‘recovering’, I can’t trust that she wouldn’t be out there snooping.” She locked the door as I leaned against the vanity.
Seeing her so calculating yet worked up made me want to go to her and hold her close. I admired her foresight to disguise that I was here. I enjoyed how seamlessly she wanted to confide in me. And I hated that she was upset about this at all.
What the fuck is happening here?
It was bad to care, but now I was letting myself get in deeper.
For the wrong woman.
“That…” She clenched her teeth, pacing. “That bitch!”
“She’s being hasty,” I commented. “I just overheard Nickolas in passing that day, and now she’s communicating with him about it.”
She nodded, glancing at me with heat in her eyes. “Yeah. I know. And I bet she was working everything behind the scenes all that time she was hiding in her room.”
Probably.
Meanwhile, I was busy fucking her daughter.
“She’s being too hasty. And it’s never good to rush into things like this. I know my father’s death came unexpectedly for her, but this hurry to shove me into a situation with Nickolas isn’t going to solve anything.” She pointed at me. “It’s like you said. She won’t want to be under someone else’s control and have to wait for permission from a more powerful man. She could harass my father all she wanted, but she can’t do that to Nickolas or Marcus Romano.”
“Then why does she really want you to be aligned with them?” I crossed my arms, thinking about what Gio had said.
“Power. Wealth.” She shrugged but looked at me closely. “What are you thinking?”
“Something Gio mentioned.” I looked her dead in the eye. “That someone might have killed Luka to foil his plans of having the Romano connection. Could Isabella be thinking that very thing?”
She frowned. “To cheat the Bernardis out of the Romano alliance?” A bitter huff followed her words. “I could definitely see that. She’s never made it a secret that she loathes your Family.”
I narrowed my eyes. “Why?”
“Why would she make it public knowledge that she loathes your Family? Because she does everything like that. Loud and unhappily. And wanting to spread the misery.”
“No. Why do the Acardis hate us? Why have we been raised to think of each other as the enemy?”
Finally, she paused in her pacing to face me. The troubled expression on her gorgeous features suggested that I had her there—confused and without an answer.
“I don’t know.” She arched a brow. “Do you?”
I shook my head. “No. Just what I was always told.”
“Same.”
“But…” I rubbed my hand over the back of my neck. “The lines are blurring.”
“They blurred. Past tense.” She pointed a finger at me and hardened into a scowl. “ Only once.” Slipping back into pacing, she covered her face with both hands. “You took my virginity, Renzo.”
I intercepted her, hugging her tightly. “Don’t wait for an apology.”
She growled lightly and shook her head. “I’m… I’m not asking for one.”
“Fuck. Don’t do this.” I lowered my head to hers, kissing along her jaw. “Don’t?—”
“I don’t regret it,” she argued, turning to press her lips to mine. My dick hardened, and I struggled to breathe past the instant hit of desire that overcame me. Before I could deepen the contact and taste her smart mouth, she pulled back and evaded my touch.
“But I do know it can’t happen again.” She laughed once, mirthlessly. “We cannot have sex again. Not when I’m promised to that monster.”
The frustration and longing in her voice cut at my heart, but I heeded her wishes. Staying back by the vanity, I watched her pace faster.
“He’s terrible. I don’t even want to know what you could tell me about him. I’ve heard enough rumors. I can’t…” She shook her head. “I won’t marry him.”
I admired her strength and determination. But there was no way out of this. She had no voice.
“Uncle Dario almost laughed at me when I asked if he knew about any plans for me to marry Nickolas. He said no. He thinks we should wait to arrange any marriage until we have a better idea of who our enemies are.”
I nodded. “I agree with that.”
“I’m not asking for your opinion.” She softened the bite of her words by glancing at me. “And you can’t do anything about it either.”
“I already have. You’re not a virgin any longer.”
She groaned. “Yeah, but we can’t be together due to the rivalry. Shit! What if Nickolas is furious that I’m not clean?”
“Don’t say it like that.” I knew damn well what she meant. Unclean as in no longer a virgin. I disliked the suggestion that my cum didn’t belong in her. It did.
“What if he takes it out on me when he realizes I’m not a virgin?” she asked, her dark eyes so wide open with vulnerability.
“I don’t think…” I licked my lips and lowered my gaze. The weight of her direct focus was too much to bear. I hadn’t thought about that last night. I’d been too overwhelmed with the need to fill her. Once I saw the evidence of how badly she’d wanted me too, my control snapped.
“What?” She wasn’t letting me off the hook easily. “You weren’t thinking last night.”
“Neither of us were.” I narrowed my eyes. “Like sneaking into that club and spying.”
She groaned.
“I don’t think Nickolas will necessarily know you’re not a virgin.”
Her lips pressed tightly together. Her nostrils flared. She was not happy with my input, and I was so damn fallen that all I could think was how gorgeous she looked like this. Mad and passionate, smart and doing her best not to be hysterical about her predicament.
“They don’t always check for blood, and…”
“And he’ll rape me so hard and quick, he won’t even realize anything else.”
I winced. This can’t happen.
“She’s unhinged. Crazy. I mean… To expect any of her daughters to be with Nickolas?” She shuddered.
“This is how it works,” I reminded her.
“I know that.” Again, she rubbed her face. “That’s how things work in this world. But if I run…”
What? I pushed off the vanity to approach her. “No.”
She stared at me, deadpan. “So you think I should just grin and bear it?”
“No. But running?” I shook my head. I couldn’t stand to think of her gone. She could stay, be my mistress and avoid her husband as much as she could. I couldn’t choose my bride any more than she could choose her husband, but we could still be able to meet up.
“There has to be another option out of this.”
“Like what?”
“I don’t know.” Her deep gaze captured me. “But with Luka’s death, then my father’s so soon after… I can’t stop thinking that something bigger is at play. And whatever it is, this new shakeup of power and enemies and secret plots, I want nothing to do with it.”
“Running away isn’t the answer.”
She rolled her eyes. “I know that.”
“I doubt it could even work.” If she jilted Nickolas, he’d run after her, bring her back, and make her pay.
“Then, what else is there to do? No one will confess to killing Luka.”
She narrowed her eyes. “You don’t have any ideas?”
I shook my head. I did, but nothing she wanted to hear. This was a serious conversation about a heavy topic, but my control was still so thin. Being alone with her tempted me.
“What’d you sneak over here for, anyway?”
I took her hand, pulling her close. “First, I wanted to see if you were okay.”
She huffed and yanked her fingers away. “Because of last night? Yes. Against my better judgment, I’d do it all over again.”
“But I also wanted your input about Cecilia.”
Perking up, curious, she cocked her head to the side. “Cecilia Romano?”
“Yes. She’s missing. And my father was wondering what’s going on with her.”
“Because she’s his daughter-in-law?”
More like he’s determined to make her an active daughter-in-law.
“Yes, but Marcus seems to not know where she is either, and he wants her home where he can control her.”
Her smile was sarcastic and sad. “See? I’m not the only woman who wants to run away and hide in this world.”
Don’t. Please.
Because Giulia was the only woman I wanted to keep close, however I could.
She was the one person I didn’t want to flee and hide away from everyone.
Unless she was doing so with me.
“You don’t have any ideas about where she might be?”
She shook her head.
“You haven’t heard any gossip?”
The sassy smirk she gave me taunted me to desire her even more. “The last time I tried to get intel and eavesdrop didn’t turn out so well.”
I scowled. “No, it didn’t.”
“I haven’t heard anything about Cecilia.”
“Not even from Isabella?”
“Nope.” She shook her head. “Until this morning, when she wanted to explain that I was engaged to the devil, she’d been in her room. I haven’t spoken with her all week. Even at the ‘funeral’ for my father. She didn’t speak to any of us.”
With that account, it would’ve been easy to assume that the woman was suffering from immense grief. The only catch with that was how horribly she’d treated Rocco. Never with love, and very public and vocal with her disgust and annoyance with him.
“That doesn’t mean she won’t have a clue,” Giulia added. “I think she was in her room planning and living in peace just fine.”
“I won’t ask you to speak with her, but…” I raised my brows.
She shrugged. “I’ll see if I can eavesdrop or something. Someone’s got to know something.”
I nodded.
Sooner or later, the truth would come out. But even after it did, I wasn’t sure it would help anything between me and this amazing woman I wanted to call my own forever.
“We’ll figure something out.” It was a weak promise, but I had to give her some indication that I didn’t want to leave her stranded with no options.
“Oh, yeah? How?”
“I don’t know. I’ll think about it. And we’ll… figure something out.”
“Something that would avoid my having to marry Nickolas?”
I grimaced.
“I will run, Renzo. I cannot be with him. Not after I could see how good it is with you…” She shook her head and headed toward the shower to turn the water off. Pressing a kiss to my cheek was the only detour she allowed before stepping out of my reach again. “I know better than to hope for a repeat or any future for us, but I know that my fate will not be tied with him.”