Chapter 32
CHAPTER
THIRTY-TWO
DILLON
W inter had finally set in and temperatures had plummeted, my glass heart along with it. I knew I deserved what I had gotten—karma fucked me in the ass and made me its bitch. It hurt to keep my distance, but Buchanan said I needed to give my little crow time to find his wings again. As much as I hated him for saying it, I knew in my heart he was right. I would have been at Jamie’s dorm that same day, banging his door down if I’d had my way, but B convinced me it would do more harm than good. Hurting Jamie more than I already had would have pushed me over the edge.
Watching him suffer and become a shell of who he was though—fuck! It was nearly killing me along with the unrelenting guilt eating away at me inside. I didn’t think I would ever be able to bleach my mind enough to remove those memories. It was like watching someone slowly die and not being able to save them. Day by day, little bits of what made him who he was faded away until there was nothing left. First, it was the glowing aura that made you feel like he’d encapsulated you in sunlight. Then, the life drained out of his face, and his skin turned ashen and dull. His one vibrant ice-blue eyes were consumed by shadows, just like my soul. Every change irreparably broke a piece of me that I didn’t want to fix if I couldn’t have him. Hold him. Love him.
If I thought I’d stalked him across campus before, it had nothing on what I did now. I didn’t just wait outside his classes, I became his shadow. Wherever he was, even in his dorm, I was there watching. My grades nosedived, and I was on the verge of being benched, but I didn’t give a fuck. Coach understood—to a certain degree—but told me my puppy love infatuation had to stop, and if I didn’t pull myself together after Christmas break, then I’d lose my captaincy.
Chad, the fucking waste of space, started parading around campus like a prized peacock, telling everyone he was going to be captain next year. Thankfully, no one took him at his word. Revenge was a dish best served cold, and it was epic to watch him blow up when people scoffed or laughed in his face. The one thing I couldn’t wrap my head around was how Elise was suddenly glued to his side with hearts in her eyes. Not that I minded. Anything to keep that psycho bitch away from me was a win.
Cold wind stung my cheeks as it carved a path through the trees while I waited for my little crow to leave the dorms and head to Bean There to meet Ava like he did most mornings. The overcast sky was thick with churning shades of gray that threatened snow but so far had held off. Jamie had always been obsessed with the white shit when we were younger, and a crazed grin cut across my face as memories of past winters with him floated through my mind.
My breath caught in my throat as he slipped through the open door and buttoned up a thick dark gray peacoat. My heart beat its way out of my chest as my eyes roved over him from head to toe and back again, taking in every detail of his appearance. “Fuck.” I scrubbed my hand through my stubble as I tried to reconcile the Jamie before me with the one I’d seen close up on Friday.
He looked fucking edible, and my mouth watered. He was glowing, more radiant than he had been in months. His hair looked like spun gold, his face flawless, but it was his eyes that drew me in. Even from my vantage point, they smoldered, and it made my dick twitch in my pants. “Shit,” I ground out as I pushed the heel of my hand against my growing bulge. I needed to kiss him, claim him, and stop anyone else from thinking they had a chance.
He was fucking mine .
Since I’d called off my idiotic idea of scaring the shit out of him to get him to leave, I’d noticed just how much attention my little crow garnered. I mean, I’d picked up on it before, but it had grown exponentially. And because I’d broken his heart, I was terrified he’d choose someone else, and I’d never be able to convince him to give me a second chance.
“Fuck that,” I muttered as I slinked through the trees on the far side of the lot, following him to meet Ava. I didn’t think she’d noticed me yet, but she was hyper aware of what was going on around them if they were out in the open too long. I didn’t know why, but both her and Mal had closed ranks around Jamie recently.
I could only assume it was because of what happened on Halloween. I’d beat the shit out of Chad for that epic fuck up when I found out it was his idea. I was livid that the bruises and swelling had all but faded, but it was winter and accidents happen all the time. He could fall down the stairs and break his nose. That dick deserved more than what I gave him, but luckily, the dean had received an anonymous email with attached video footage. Cory had turned out to be very useful, and now Chad was on probation.
A growl rumbled in my chest as Ava wrapped her arms around Jamie and pulled him in for a hug. My reaction might be irrational, but I couldn’t deny my need for him. After six weeks, I was like a thirsty man in the desert. The only sustenance I needed was him, and I was going to do whatever it took to get him back. Jamie pulled his phone out of his pocket, swiped across the screen, and slipped it back in. I knew it was his ten minute alarm, and when he got up and blew Ava an air kiss, my skin started to tingle. This was my chance, and I was going to grab it with both fucking hands.
On silent feet, I followed him into the building. There were only three rooms that had classes at eight in the morning, and I knew which rooms would be free. I slipped through the open door before it shut on his heels. “Jamie?” I called out. His shoulders hunched, and he ignored me. Oh, that would not do. My little crow didn’t get to walk away from me again. “Jamie, please.” My heart hammered against my ribs. “Please.”
He froze as if he was about to spin around but was struck by indecision with one arm slightly outstretched. I took my chance, my hand ghosting down his arm and latching onto his wrist. His breath hitched in his throat, loud enough to resonate through the empty corridor.
“I really need to talk to you.” I laced my fingers with his, and my body sung at the contact as electricity danced over my skin. “Fuck,” I breathed out at my body’s potent reaction to him. His sweet caramel scent grew stronger, and I took a deep inhale before dragging him into an empty room.
“Jesus, Dillon,” he grumbled as I pushed him up against the door. He looked like he wanted to fight me, but his body was pliable in my hands.
“I missed you.” My voice was pained as I saw nothing but devastation in his shadowed eyes. “I’m so sorry, baby. But I can’t stay away from you any longer. I can’t b-breath without you, little crow,” I murmured as I closed the space between our bodies until my hips pinned him to the door, and my arms bracketed his head.
“D-Dil,” he groaned, and his length thickened against me. His breaths hit the side of my neck in short sharp pants as the temperature in the room rose.
I rolled my hips against him, desperately seeking friction for my pulsing cock without realizing Jamie moved with me. It was euphoric after not touching him for over six weeks. I unwound the scarf around his neck when he tipped his head back and groaned. The sound reverberated straight through me, like a bolt of lust to my balls. “Fuck, you smell so good, baby.” I moaned as I ran my nose along his arched neck, deeply inhaling his scent.
“D-Dillon.” His hands rested on my shoulders, tension radiating off him like he was going to push me away. I would have stopped if he had, but instead, he laced his fingers in my hair and pulled my head closer. “Fuck. We s-shouldn’t be doing this.” He gasped as I sucked biting kisses across his jaw to his ear. I teased the shell with the tip of my tongue, making him shudder before sinking my teeth into the lobe until he groaned long and low.
When I went to pull away, he held me in place, tightening his hold in my hair and guiding me back to his neck. I licked from the base of his neck to his fluttering pulse and smiled against his skin as goosebumps bloomed across it.
“Oh, baby, I’ve missed you,” I said between drugging kisses on his slick skin as I worked on unbuttoning his coat and slipped it off his shoulders. It fell to the floor with a finality that gave me the confidence to continue to take from him. To give to him. To mark his perfect skin with my bruises, so everyone would know he was mine.
“Oh god. Oh god.” He pulled my head back and fused his mouth to mine, and a jolt of lust-filled adrenaline surged through me, because he wanted me as much as I wanted him. His tongue teased across the seam of my lips, begging for entry. The frenetic need pouring off him only served to fuel the burning need flowing through my veins. Jamie had me so wound up, I couldn’t breathe as he owned my body. I didn’t care that my lungs were screaming at me. Who needed oxygen anyway?
I groaned as Jamie speared his tongue through my lips. He tasted and teased me to within an inch of my life, and we devoured each other with an unmatched hunger as our teeth clashed with desperation. Our tongues wrapped around each other in a sensual dance as I coasted my hands down his sides. The feel of silk beneath my fingertips was as delicate as his skin.
He pulled my bottom lip between his teeth and bit down hard enough for me to taste copper.
“I need to taste you, little crow,” I murmured, my lips brushing his with each syllable. Pulses of electricity skittered across my skin. My fingers hooked into the waistband of his pants and trailed around his sides before I pushed down inside and felt the smooth heat of the perfect globes of his ass. I sank my fingers into them as I dropped to my knees and pulled his clothed groin into my face. I rested my forehead against his hard erection, loving the heat radiating off him and looked up at him through my lashes. “Please.” One powerful word, both a plea and a promise.
“Yes, Dillon.” Jamie bit down on his lip, lust blazing in his eyes as he watched me flick open the button and slowly pull the zipper down. I knew Jamie had a thing for lace, and I couldn’t wait to see what surprise he was wearing for me today.
“Oh fuck, baby. You’re perfect. Just fucking perfect for me.” I buried my face into the delicate white lace snowflakes and licked along his shaft from root to tip, savoring his musky taste before sucking his leaking tip through the barely there material of his thong.
Jamie’s hands carded through my hair, and his blunt nails scraping over my scalp made me shiver. I nipped the top of his thong with my teeth and pulled it down his cock. “Oh god, that’s hot. Why is that so damn hot?” He groaned as his length broke free and slapped against his abdomen. His cock glistened in the soft light from the partly shaded windows, and I could just make out a string of precum hanging between his glans and stomach.
I licked my lips, and saliva pooled in my mouth as I ached to swallow him down. “Fuck, little crow. You have no idea how much I need you in my mouth. I want to feel you fuck the back of my throat.” I grasped his base and lapped at the wetness dripping down his shaft. Holding him still, I circled his glans with my tongue before dipping it into his weeping slit. “Fuck, baby, you’re so wet for me.” Jamie’s head hit the door as he groaned, his abs tightening under my hand as I slid it across his soft skin. “Is your greedy little hole begging for me? Is it clenching around thin air?”
“Stop talking, and suck my dick,” he bit out. Fuck, he looked like the best wet dream, with his cheeks flushed, skin covered in a sheen of sweat, and wild eyes pinned on me. Fuck, yeah.
I chuckled and pulled him closer. “Don’t be grumpy, baby. I’m gonna make you feel so good.” I flattened my tongue, pulled his flushed head down so it was facing me, and licked at him like he was my favorite flavor of ice cream.
“Dillon, I swear to god, I’m gonna leave if you don’t—” I wrapped my lips around him and sucked him all the way to the back of my throat in one go, moaning as his velvety length slid along my tongue. “Oh god. Yes, more. More.”
Your wish is my command. I smiled around his length and hummed my approval as he pulsed in my mouth. I licked my way up his shaft until just the tip rested on my lips and flicked my tongue over his slit, making him shudder. I hollowed my cheeks, increasing the pressure around him as I sucked him back down my throat. “That’s it Dill. So good. So, so, good.”
My hands slid up his thighs as I continued to lick and suck him like my life depended on it and reveled in the feel of his straining muscles. As my hands cupped his ass, he trembled beneath me. I dug my fingers into the supple flesh before tracing them along his crease. Jamie’s hold on my hair tightened to the point of pain. His hips rolled, chasing my mouth, forcing his length farther down my throat. His cock grew thicker in my mouth as a whimpering moan worked its way past his parted lips.
I watched his fluttering lashes closely as I pulled his cheeks apart. He gasped as cool air hit his perfect hole, and his length jerked in my throat, making me gag. “Damn, that’s hot. You gonna cry for me, babe?”
Fuck. I loved it when he let go, and his baser instincts ruled him. My little crow was a filthy fucker underneath all that perfect beauty. I wanted him to fuck my throat so hard I couldn’t talk. I wanted to feel him all day. If this was all he’d give me, I would hold on to the memory of him for as long as I could.
“I-I’m close.” His length thickened even more, stretching my lips to the point of pain as he pulled my head down so my nose was nestled against his silky flesh. I pulled back enough to suck in a gasping breath before doubling down and swirled my finger around his pucker, making him whine.
“Oh god. Oh, shit. More…more…” His whimpers set my skin alight as they turned to stuttering inhales and exhales, his words becoming nothing more than a garbled mess. I pushed my finger against his tight entrance, forcing myself inside him.
Jamie let out a scream and clamped down on my finger. Fuck. I moaned around him as his muscles spasmed around my finger. I pulled off his length and begged, “Come on my face, little crow. Come on me and show everyone who I belong to.”
He stroked his cock, and I tipped my head back, opening my mouth just as the first thick rope of cum lashed across my face. “Oh, fuck. Dillon! Yes. Yes. Yes,” Jamie bellowed as he covered my face in his cum. It dripped into my mouth, and I groaned as his taste filled my mouth.
“More. Give me all of it. I want you inside me. Fuck, your ass is crushing my finger.” Another spurt landed on my extended tongue, and Jamie collapsed against the door. Utter bliss resonated through me as I drank him down and licked what I could off my face.
He was the picture of ecstasy as he leaned against the door, his chest heaving with labored breaths, legs shaking, and his hand still holding his softening dick as one last pearl of cum leaked from his slit. I leaned forward and licked him clean, pulled up this thong, and did up his jeans.
When Jamie opened his eyes, the blue depths were blotted out by pools of black, but as soon as we made eye contact, he shrunk back into himself. Guilt and shame washed over his features before they settled into neutrality. “This shouldn’t have happened. It was a mistake,” he said, brushing his curls off his face and picking his jacket up off the floor.
“Jamie,” I rasped, my throat raw and aching. “It wasn’t me. I didn’t do those things. I didn’t know?—”
His glare had me eating my words; it was like I was strung up by a noose. “No.” He shook his head and slipped his arms into his peacoat before tying his scarf. “You might not have planned what they did, but you gave the order and set the precedent. So don’t tell me it wasn’t you. Guilt by association is still guilty, Dillon.”
His words landed blow after blow, perfectly timed for maximum impact.
“Fuck, Jamie I’m sorry. I was?—”
“Hurt? Two wrongs don’t make a right, Dil.” He turned on his heel and disappeared through the door. It clicked shut with a resounding thud. My heart stopped beating as I knelt there, covered cum and with tears streaming down my face.
“I never meant to hurt you, little crow. I’m so sorry,” I whispered into the silent room.