Chapter Twenty-Three #2
Gently, Cormal continued, “When it reached its natural conclusion, I got sort of stuck in an infinite loop, building it up in my head as something much more than it ever was. Looking back, it’s more than obvious that Brannal only ever wanted to be friends.
I value that friendship very much, and if I’ve managed not to utterly destroy it, I’m delighted. But there wasn’t a deeper connection.”
Kinan was frowning. “But he’s your best friend. Isn’t that a deeper connection?”
“He was my best friend. When we were kids. We fell into bed together for a little while. Then we both kept trying to please my father, until I decided to keep a terrible secret and drove a wedge between us.”
“It’s not that simple,” Kinan protested.
Cormal shrugged. “Maybe not. There were a few years in there where everyone was in survival mode, especially Brannal. But don’t you think it’s telling that I didn’t confess to him?”
Kinan’s gaze was stern. “You chose to protect him and shoulder that burden yourself.”
Cormal huffed, half smiling. “And you’re very good about defending me whether or not I deserve it.”
“You always deserve it,” Kinan argued. “Even when you’re stupid.”
Cormal felt a full smile bloom on his face. “Thank you. You made me realize what a good partner is. I’m in awe of you.”
Kinan blinked at him, looking surprised.
Cormal continued, “You’re kind and smart and thoughtful even though you’ve had these terrible things happen to you.
You listen to me as well as tell me when I’m being an ass.
Yes, it matters to me that you chose me, but that’s because no one ever chooses me, Kinan.
I mean, not for more than a few nights of fun at the Fire Festival. ”
Kinan actually growled, and Cormal couldn’t help the laugh that welled out, because Kinan jealous—really?—was such a novel concept.
“That was a stranger who liked what I could do with fire,” he said dismissively.
“It wasn’t really about me. But you actually know me and have seen me at my absolute worst. You reached out your hand when I was at my lowest, and you helped me pull myself out of the pit I’d dug for myself.
No one’s ever cared for me like that. And for once in my life, it’s not just about me.
” Cormal swallowed. “I want to make you happy. I want so much to make your life better in every way that I can. I’m sorry if I failed to do that today. ”
Kinan was actively crying now, and Cormal tried to brush the tears off his face, made even less possible when Kinan shook his head.
“No, no, don’t say that. Today was for you. I meant to come here and help you, and now I’m whining because it wasn’t all about me while you were asking for forgiveness. That’s awful.”
Cormal tried to lean their foreheads together.
“Hey. You’re never awful. I’ve got the market covered.”
Kinan snorted a wet sound. “I don’t mean to be so insecure.”
“No one has ever had to live the way you do,” Cormal pointed out. “And if you were clinging to an ex-boyfriend when I couldn’t even touch you, we both know that there’d be some fireballs lobbed around, don’t we?”
And finally Kinan laughed, much of the tension releasing from his body.
“Oh, does our behavior become acceptable as long as we both behave badly?”
“That’s how this works, isn’t it?” Cormal asked.
Kinan laughed, his eyes bright again. “I’m sorry. Truly.”
“There’s nothing to forgive. This was a very emotional day. But if you’re all right with it, I would very much like to cuddle in bed.”
Kinan eyed him. “Just cuddle?”
“Unless you’d like to do more than cuddle.”
“They might hear us.”
Cormal raised an eyebrow. “Do you think either of them would be surprised?”
Kinan snorted with laughter. “True.”
Cormal smiled back. “What would you like to do tonight, Kee?”
Kinan bit his lip and hesitated.
“Hey,” Cormal said, leaning closer. “You can tell me anything.”
Kinan whispered, “Would you—” He swallowed thickly. “Would you finger yourself open for me? Pretend it’s my cock?”
Cormal sucked in a breath, and his voice was raw when he said, “Yeah, I’d be happy to do that.”
He pulled off his sleep trousers, and Kinan was naked a moment later.
Cormal retrieved the bottle of oil that he’d packed and laid back on the bed, planting his feet, legs spread wide as he canted his hips so that he could expose himself to Kinan’s avid gaze.
The man’s hand was already on his cock, the pre-come gathering there giving him something to stroke with.
Cormal spilled oil into his palm and slicked up his fingers.
“Would you tease me?” Cormal asked, looking straight at Kinan.
He nodded. “I’d run my fingers around your rim, just a bit of pressure. So you’d know I was there, but you wouldn’t know when I was going to do more.”
Cormal did as directed, running his slippery fingers over his hole, round and round until Kinan spoke again.
“I’d push one finger inside, all the way in, a slow slide, because I knew you could take it.”
Cormal buried a finger as far inside himself as he could.
“I’d fuck you with that finger,” Kinan said breathlessly.
Cormal fucked himself, but it wasn’t enough stimulation. “More,” he begged.
Kinan smiled. “And when you asked me nicely, I’d give you another finger.”
“Please.”
“Go ahead.”
Cormal pressed a second finger inside himself, able to scissor now, to stretch, and that was a little better, though it still wasn’t what he craved.
He wanted the beautiful cock that he could see in front of him, which Kinan was still stroking, fist pumping up and down in a smooth, rhythmic motion.
Cormal wanted so much to feel that hard length inside of him, but he wasn’t going to get his wish, at least not today.
“Add another finger.”
The third finger burned a little, but Cormal breathed through it, letting out a breathless sort of moan that made Kinan pump his hand a little faster.
“You like that?” he asked.
Cormal managed to nod. “Want you.”
“I want you, too,” Kinan told him. “I’d be hitting your pleasure spot every time I fucked into you.”
Cormal whined and thrust faster with his fingers. He’d always found it awkward trying to stimulate himself.
“Would you make it good for me?” he asked.
“So good,” Kinan promised, eyes like stars, sweat dotting his forehead. His hand was flying on his cock. “I’d touch your cock, too.”
Cormal wrapped his other hand around his cock, groaning at the pressure.
Kinan’s voice was low. “I’d make you happy just like you make me happy. Come for me, please.”
Cormal arched and came, his body clamping down on his fingers, his cock pulsing violently, spurting across his belly as Kinan came next to him.
Cormal pulled out his fingers, ass clenching around nothing. He stretched his legs out and wiped himself mostly clean with a bit of the sheet. Kinan lay down beside him, and Cormal managed to sort of fling the covers over them.
(Kinan would usually stay under the covers if he was there when they were laid over him. He ended up on top of them if he laid down over them. He couldn’t squirm under them himself.)
“Thank you for being so wonderful,” Cormal told him.
“You, too,” Kinan agreed, voice full of contentment.
Tomorrow, they would find out if there was anything that Perian could do to help again. Cormal was trying not to let himself pin all his hopes on it, but it was hard not to dream.
He loved everything that they did together, and if this was all they could have, he’d be more than grateful for it, but… he wanted more for Kinan.
But for now, the man was naked and sated and lying happily next to Cormal, and that was enough.
Cormal started awake, not sure what had woken him. Kinan had roused at his side with a bleary, “What—?”
There was a crashing sound… from below them?
Was the house under attack?
Cormal scrambled to his feet, Kinan rising as well, and they rushed into the hallway, meeting Brannal and Perian at the top of the stairs.
A moment later, the area was lit with the glow of multiple fireballs.
“Whoever you are, you just made a big mistake!”