Chapter 6 #4
I narrowed my eyes, trying to find a trap, but unable to find one. “Fine…what?”
“As I was saying, I don’t trust myself to be the parent he needs,” he said with no shred of guilt or misery.
It was the voice of a man who was confident not just in his abilities, but comfortable with his shortcomings…
at least in that. “If I were his point of contact here, I fear my protective instincts and…parental discomfort of him experiencing certain things that are important for adulthood would get in the way. I would keep an eye on him, and either get in his way or…as you tried to be tactful about earlier, bear witness to something I don’t want to see. ”
“Right,” I said, less in agreement and more to show I understood what he was saying. “So…where do I come in?”
“Where you come in is that, adult or not…he’s still a young adult who’s going to be operating on his own here,” Marc said, folding his hands in front of him.
“Which means it could be beneficial to have someone to guide him if he wants, which would be up to your discretion, not mine. You are, as you put it, someone he likes and trusts, and I suspect he would believe you more willing to give him space than Charlene or me, and I fear he’s right.
So, I think you’d be the best candidate for giving him what he wants while also being willing to provide what he needs. ”
I stared at him. “You’re telling me to monitor your son and make sure he doesn’t get into trouble?”
“I’m asking you to be there for him, keeping an eye on him but not interfering any more than you would with anyone else…maybe a little more,” he said with a smile. “Be his Guide, basically.”
“That…” Okay, it wasn’t as bad as I’d feared, but it was still more than I’d expected. I wasn’t expecting him to put that level of responsibility on me…or trust. “You realize what you’re asking me, right?”
“I do,” he said with a smile. “And I can’t think of anyone I would rather put in that position, even though I know it’s not exactly the most comfortable position.”
“It’s a very…trusting one,” I said, clearing my throat. “Are you sure?”
“Quite.”
“And, uh, what does Charlene think about that?”
“You assume I asked her what she feels about how I handle things in this resort.”
“When it comes to Jude? Yeah, you did.”
He chuckled. “I did; you’re right. Are you sure you want to hear what she said?”
“Better get it out of the way now,” I said with a wince. Charlene wasn’t a cruel or even a mean woman, but she could be unyielding, and when it came to her only child? Oof, yeah, she could be hell on wheels if she thought she was dealing with a threat to his life or well-being.
“She said that if anyone in this ‘mental hell hole,’ her words by the way, was going to keep an eye on her son,” he said with bitter emphasis that, while slight, I didn’t miss. “That she would at least sleep at night if you were doing it.”
“From anyone else, I would sarcastically comment that that isn’t exactly a ringing endorsement,” I said in shock. “Coming from Charlene, though? That’s—”
“Practically throwing you a parade and giving you a key to the city, yes,” Marc said with a shrug.
“I won’t say that I don’t know why she trusts you, because I know all the reasons you are trustworthy, especially in this.
But I will say I’m surprised she took the time to notice.
Charlene is…a hard woman to please, and she doesn’t look for reasons to trust someone when she can find several reasons to distrust them. ”
It was one of the rare times he spoke ill of Charlene, and I couldn’t decide if that was dignity and maturity on his part, or unhealthy self-repression and a need to be in control.
I knew enough details of their separation and divorce to understand that while both had played their parts in the slow dissolution of their marriage, the final and irreparable deathblow had come when she had not only been unfaithful but had actively carried on an affair.
While I didn’t condone needlessly and toxically focusing on the things your ex had done in a relationship, you needed to acknowledge what they’d done wrong, and the pain and anger that came with it.
As far as I knew, Marc had never done those things.
He had every right to hate Charlene, to speak ill of her when Jude or mutual friends weren’t around, but he never did.
Even that was less of a bitter comment on her character and more a soft criticism that could almost be considered a checkbox marked off to keep a note of.
“But in this, we are of one mind,” he said with a chuckle that was dry and a little…tired? Bitter? Or maybe just knowing. “And I ask this of you, not because I want our relationship to be the pivotal, deciding factor. I don’t want you to choose with me as a factor.”
“Right,” I said, definitely not agreeing with him.
Mostly because there was no way I could think about agreeing or disagreeing without bringing him into it.
Jude was his son after all; Marc was my best friend and business partner.
There was no way to take him out of the equation, and he should have known better. “Okay, I’ll do it.”
“Normally I would accept an answer from you because that’s how you are, and your instincts are reliable enough that even if my cautious nature leaves me concerned at the frivolous way you do things—”
“But this is your son, I get it. Just keep trusting my instincts, I guess, because giving this more thought will not change my answer, I can tell you that much,” I said, picking up my fork to finish my food.
“When he gets here in like…a week, then I’ll do what you asked.
I mean, if it goes badly, I’ll feel like absolute dog shit, but at least I know I wasn’t the only one who made a bad choice.
You and Charlene will…with an added dose of parental guilt on top. ”
Marc stared at me with the driest expression. “Yes, thank you for your awareness, less so for your lack of tact.”
“Yeah, well, that’s the price you pay for having me in your life and trusting me with stuff like this,” I said brightly, dumping the plastic container into his nearby trash can.
“Now, if you’ll excuse me, I should at least consider what I’m going to say when I call an impromptu, whole-resort meeting tomorrow.
Who knows, maybe there’ll be enough of an uproar that I’ll be spared from having to take on this new responsibility…
ugh, and it’s the summer season too! Christ, what a few months this is going to be. ”
“Ah, you’re bitching and being slightly histrionic,” Marc said, and the bastard’s shoulders were easing. “Well, I suppose that’s that.”
“I’m not even going to ask because I have enough on my plate without worrying about what you’re thinking,” I said, pushing up from the desk. “Question for you, though.”
“Of course,” he said.
“Did you sleep with any guys I know?” I wondered.
A strange expression flashed over his face, gone too fast for me to determine if it was unhappiness, pain, distrust, guilt, or any other negative emotion, I knew he wasn’t feeling great at hearing the question and I felt a pang of guilt.
“Any other questions beyond those nosing into old, personal history?”
“Fine,” I said, taking the not so gentle hint and letting myself out the door. “But I’ll be asking again, because I don’t believe you.”
“Of course you don’t,” he said wearily, and yet…there was affection.