Walker #3
“I didn’t say that,” I insisted, wondering if I could get away from our closeness without upsetting him. Considering the sheer size of him though, I would have an easier time making a boulder get out of my way; at least I couldn’t hurt a hunk of rock’s feelings.
“But ya don’t believe me.”
“I didn’t say that either. I said that there’s a chance you believe it, and I believe that.”
“That’s fuckin’ insulting.”
“It’s…Cade, please.”
“No, ya don’t get to stand there and accuse me of babyin’ ya, then turn around and say I’m the one losin’ his mind. I might be half off my rocker, but I know what I felt, alright? Ya don’t get to tell me what I did or didn’t feel.”
I sighed; this conversation was falling off the tracks rapidly, and I needed to right it before it…I don’t know, crashed and burned, taking out an untold number of people. “Cade, I hear you, I do, but—”
“Shut up,” he grumbled, gripping my shoulders tighter. “Fine, here.”
I realized what ‘here’ meant only a split second before his mouth moved closer to mine, giving me long enough to squawk a protest before all ability to make a sound was wiped from me.
At first, the kiss was even more awkward than the one I’d surprised him with back in my room before fleeing to the relative safety of…
not being around Cade. It didn’t help that I was stiff with shock from his kiss, and my back was awkwardly pressed against the window.
It didn’t last long, just enough for me to almost relax into the kiss, to give in to this insanity before he snapped back with a frown.
“Cade,” I tried again, my voice weak as my head swam.
“That wasn’t right,” he said and before I could point out that of course it wasn’t right, he tilted his head and his hands slipped up from my shoulders and cupped the bottom of my jaw before he eased forward and tried again.
It was the simplest change in position of our faces and his hands, but the kiss was immediately miles above what the last two had been.
His lips were soft but insistent against mine, his fingers gentle but still clasping me.
There was no tension or reluctance on my part as I felt his lips part ever so slightly, doing the same with mine.
I felt my tongue slip forward, running the tip along the edge of his bottom lip, and God save me, I actually felt his fingers flex against my face as if he had enjoyed it.
Only for him to take the ‘if’ and throw it out into the mountains as his tongue darted out to meet mine.
It was hesitant at first, but then pushed forward and slid over mine as our mouths opened further.
I brought my hands up to wrap one around his shoulder and hold on to the middle of his back, the other behind his head gripping his hair and pulling him tighter against me.
I didn’t have the mental strength to hope the glass I was pressed against was stronger than your average glass as I held tight to him, bringing one of my legs up to hook around his good one.
My thoughts swirled, leaving me breathless and confused when I realized he was pulling away.
It was a gentle thing, but firm as he detached his lips from mine and let his hands rest against my chest as he stared at me.
Gone was the delight from his face, and the irritation at me, and it was replaced by something wide-eyed as he stood, towering over me, his chest rising and falling as if he had just gone for a run.
“You liked it,” I said, because it was the only thing clear in my head.
“Uh, yeah,” he said roughly, his voice quiet. He blinked rapidly before his brow furrowed. I didn’t understand what had caught his attention, or was making him look so confused until he looked down. I followed his gaze and—
“Oh…” I said, snapping my head up from the obvious bulge in his jeans.
It seemed I hadn’t been wrong the other day when I’d said that even good pants wouldn’t be enough to conceal his dick if it got hard.
I was also apparently right when I had privately thought that he was a grower, and if that was the case, then what there was left to grow was going to be plenty impressive. “You—”
“Liked it,” he finished simply, and I looked back up to stare him in the eyes, not sure what I was supposed to do with this sudden influx of information.
“I…” was all that came out. I stood there, meeting his eyes as he stared at me with…I didn’t know what to call his expression, actually. It wasn’t outright encouraging, but it also wasn’t making me want to step away.
He glanced down and nodded. “You liked it.”
“This is so, so, so weird,” I said, wondering if I had accidentally stumbled into some alternate universe. It felt like everything was canted slightly, and I was the only one who could see how absurd everything had become.
“Kinda,” Cade said, wrinkling his nose. “I had a guy kiss me, then I got mad and kissed him back and realized I liked both kisses. Then I got hard from it, so yeah.”
“You’re great at summarizing things I was a witness and participant in,” I said wryly, rubbing my face with my sweaty palm. I made a face and wiped it on my pants. “I don’t know what to do here.”
“I dunno, what do people usually do when they kiss and like it?” he asked, and honestly, if it wasn’t for the fact that I knew he had been with other people before, I would almost believe him.
Except I had to give him a free pass because this was the first time he had ever had that experience with a guy.
“Look,” I began, reaching out to…well, I didn’t know what I was going to do other than touch him. I hesitated before letting my hands hang there. “This is weird for both of us, I expect.”
“Hmm,” he said, sounding curious again, and took his hands off my chest to grab my hands and put them on his hips. “That what you were gonna do?”
“Probably,” I said weakly, my fingers closing around his hips. “Jesus.”
“That’s kinda different.”
“Than what?”
“I mean, it’s not like I haven’t had guys touch me before.”
“Not sexually.”
“Right, I know. That’s what I mean. This is kinda different, but it’s not like the kissin’.”
“Oh, fine, then how about this?” I asked with a huff of annoyance, and I reached down to cup his dick.
Only to realize I should think twice before I did things out of frustrated impulse.
There was a thick layer of denim between my hand and his dick, but that wasn’t nearly enough not to feel the heft and size of it against my palm and my fingers.
Frustration was immediately replaced by a wave of arousal that made me feel unsteady and uncertain.
He stared at me, and then looked down at my hand, then looked back up again. “Uh, yeah, that’s definitely different.”
I froze again. “Uh, that was the part where you were supposed to be uncomfortable because this is a lot different from kissing me.”
“I mean…not that different,” he said with a chuckle. “It ain’t like I kissed ya on the cheek. There was tongue.”
“Yes, yes, there was. That is not quite the damning evidence you think it is, though.”
“I mean…you still got your hand on it.”
“I…do.”
Which was my cue to pull my hand away. Something that took a lot more willpower than I would have thought for such a small act, but with a not so small feeling of disappointment, I pulled my hand back. Only for him to take hold of it and bring it back to his groin.
“Cade,” I said, eyes wide.
“I said it was weird, I didn’t say it was bad,” he said, and now I could see he was no longer looking like a little boy who had just discovered some new wonder.
There was a spark in his eyes that was making me swallow hard as I stared up at him.
“And I’m guessin’ it ain’t much different for you. I mean…this is what you wanted, right?”
Oh, goddamn him.
“You are not going to stand there and give me shit, not now.”
“Who’s givin’ you shit? Ain’t me.”
God, his voice had dropped in pitch, and I couldn’t prove it, but I didn’t think he was doing it on purpose. He was no longer surprised by ‘liking it’; he was leaning into enjoying himself.
My jaw tightened. “You’re playing a very dangerous game with me, on purpose or by accident. No way in hell am I going to get ‘out-gayed’ by a goddamn straight man. I might not have a reputation to worry about, but I can’t let that be part of it.”
“So…ya can do more than stand there like a deer in headlights?” he asked, and then it hit me…
I was getting a glimpse of the Cade that existed when he was alone with someone.
He was still as playful as he’d always been, but there was heat creeping in, not from the edges, but from the very core of his being.
He wasn’t just liking it; he was turned on and getting more so by the second. He knew I was, and he knew he was taunting me, but that was because the asshole was trying to push me to do more.
“Fine,” I said, snapping my head back to glare up at him as I took hold of the button of his jeans. “Then when you lose this game of gay chicken, you leave me the hell alone so I can beat off later and pretend it never happened around you.”
“Guess we’ll see,” he said, not flinching even when the button of his jeans was undone and I pulled the zipper down.
He was really going to follow through on this?
I had already opened my mouth, though, so there was no chance I was going to back down from my proclaimed game of ‘gay chicken’.
Not that I didn’t want to continue; there was a buzz in my head that demanded I keep going even when I wondered if this was the best idea, and not just because we were technically in public.
Still, there was no backing down now, and I pulled open his pants, grunting in amusement when I felt the brush of fabric against the back of my fingers. “You wearing underwear and jeans didn’t hide shit. I was right.”
“Guess ya were,” he said, and the pleasant rumble of his voice that was always there had become something…more.