Chapter 27
Zinnia
Her marriage had an Open Door clause for moments like these.
Back then, she’d really thought sad was the strongest emotion she’d feel. She’d never been so entirely, mortally wrong in her life. Her heart felt like it was being sawed in half.
“Now, this isn’t anything serious yet but offers are rolling in faster than we anticipated.
All you have to do is listen to the pitches.
Let me handle this.” Amber had kept her voice low, but then slightly pushed Zinnia forward announcing, “And here she is! The latest addition to our ranks. We’re so lucky to have her. ”
Zinnia’s head was spinning—offers, pitches, lucky to have her?
Jordan was with Bea. Did he know about this?
“We’ve met.” It was the same woman who’d stopped her earlier. “She’s as beautiful as promised and so well-spoken. We’re very pleased.”
“Zinnia, this is Magda and her husband, Charles. They’re interested in producing a show starring Alfie and Tantivy Shops.”
“I had my doubts when I heard Bea was no longer in the picture, but I must say, Alfie married quite the charmer,” Charles said.
Zinnia’s severely compressed stomach jumped. She was a replacement. Zaffre Hours was truly ending, and they wanted her to replace Bea in their new show.
But Bea was still very much in the picture. Right then, in fact.
“You also own a business. ZnO2, is it?” Charles asked.
She nodded, unable to trust her voice.
“And you have two business partners—Grace and Fiona? Will they be on Zaffre Hours at all? I’d love to meet them as well. Are they here?”
“Unfortunately, no. They couldn’t make it, but I’m sure something could be arranged,” Amber said.
“I would hope so,” Magda said. “We have a strong idea of what we’d like to see—newlywed small business owners living the American dream—but we’re interested in Alfie’s take on the premise as well. Of course, using the wedding as a backdoor pilot makes the most sense so time is of the essence.”
“Wedding?” Zinnia’s voice pitched.
“We’re still figuring out logistics.” Amber placed a warm, comforting hand on Zinnia’s shoulder. “Nothing is set in stone, but if things go well that could work.”
A wedding. A new show.
Jordan promised her it was only one season. That they just had to do this first for Sadie and then they would get on with their lives. Exactly how long were they going to do this?
Zinnia began twisting her wedding ring around her finger—but then her gaze drifted to her camera pod, steadfastly filming.
Sorrow the likes of which she’d never experienced took her breath away. Jordan wasn’t coming because he was with Bea behind the black curtain. They’d been separated on purpose.
“Zinnia?” Magda asked. “What do you think?”
He isn’t coming. “I—”
“Are you all right, dear? You look a little…feverish,” Magda said.
He isn’t coming. She couldn’t stop twisting her wedding ring. Everything felt too loud and too bright and too close, as if the room were closing in on her.
He isn’t—Zinnia gasped as a hand suddenly pressed against her lower back.
Jordan
When he saw Zinnia smiling, nodding, and twisting her ring, he all but teleported to her side. His mom had tried to make introductions, but he wasn’t having it. His wife didn’t want to be there, so neither did he.
She’d taken a quick break and returned to the party like a blank slate. Nothing had happened. She was fine.
Bullshit.
Unfortunately, they didn’t get a chance to have another moment alone until they made it back to their hotel room at a little past midnight. Mics gone. Camera pods off duty.
“What happened?”
“Unzip me, please?” They were standing in the middle of the room, her back to him. She moved her braids over one shoulder. “I can’t reach.”
Jordan clenched his hands before burying them in his pockets. He knew her too well to fall for that, even though he wanted to anyway. “Zinnia.”
She sighed. “Amber told me beforehand that it wasn’t serious. All I had to do was listen. I just got overwhelmed and then I remembered how the show works. I didn’t think you’d come.”
“Of course I came.”
“I didn’t think they’d let you. The timing was too perfect.” She gave up on trying to distract him, turning around but keeping her eyes downcast. “Did it go okay with Bea?”
“I suppose.” He couldn’t even pretend to be surprised that she knew. “The network really pushed to make it happen. I hope they got what they wanted because I’m not doing it again.”
“And you’re okay? Talking to her after so many years must’ve been hard.” She finally looked at him, eyes filled with so much concern he couldn’t love her any more if he’d tried.
He nodded but said, “It wasn’t, actually. I pretty much thought about you the whole time. Will you please tell me what happened now?”
She slid her hands under his jacket, holding him at his waist but keeping her distance. That was a first. She was practically allergic to leaving space between them and he wouldn’t have it any other way.
“They want us to do another show about being married and running businesses. Charles even asked about meeting Grace and Fiona. Said it’d be an amazing promotional opportunity for us and that we needed to ‘capitalize on the moment.’ ”
Why did she sound so defeated about an offer? “And that’s it?” he asked carefully.
“Their idea has been in the works for a while because apparently, I’m Bea’s replacement,” she said quietly. “They might as well just have kicked me down the stairs and called me a spare.”
He didn’t mean to laugh. “Sorry.”
“It’s okay. I was trying to be funny.” Her timid smile was proof of that. “And Magda wants to hurry because she mentioned using someone’s wedding as a backdoor pilot, whatever that is. Amber knew what she was talking about. Who’s getting married?”
Jordan stiffened and swore under his breath.
Twenty-seven days. They’d almost made it.
“The wedding is a cover story for Sadie.” He explained the plan in its entirety, watching as her face lit up with each reveal—minus the biggest one.
“That’s so impressive,” she said. “It’s also excessive, but that’s Zaffre life, I guess. So, whose wedding is it?”
“Technically, it’s a vow renewal ceremony,” he said.
“For your parents?” When he shook his head, Zinnia’s cute half-smile vanished and she yanked her hands away from him.
“How could you?” He’d never heard her yell like that before. Strangled, hurt, and quavering—it was a phantom stab in his shattered heart. “I told you about my parents’ ceremony!”
“You did.”
“You know how much something like this would mean to me!”
“I do.”
“And you just gave that to them to curate for a storyline too? That was mine! I trusted you!”
“I didn’t. What—”
“And if I say no, then your whole family will miss—oh my god, why didn’t you ask me first?”
“Because it wasn’t my idea!” he yelled back. “Because I knew if I told you the plan, you’d say yes on the spot, and I didn’t want that! I asked you to marry me for Sadie once. This time I wanted it to be for you. I wanted it to be for us.”
She stared at him, long and hard, until her righteous anger began fading into confusion. “…What?”
“It wasn’t my idea,” he repeated, as if it were all he had to hold on to. “I wanted it to be private, something just for us. I wanted you to be sure that I was enough. That you really wanted me.”
“Of course I want you.”
“No, I mean I—” His proposal wasn’t perfect yet, but it had to be now.
“Zinnia, I wanted to marry you then and I want to marry you now. I want to meet your parents, tell them the truth about us, and ask them to be there. I want to see you in your wedding dress with your dad walking you down the aisle. I want to marry you with our friends standing by our side. I want to marry you with my family watching me make the best decision I’ve ever made, again.
I want to marry you and dance to ‘Viva Forever.’ I want to marry you not as a do-over, but as the culmination of the second chance you gave me.
I want you to be sure being with me is enough to outweigh this never-ending circus I pulled you into.
Because I don’t know if it is, and I need you to tell me. Am I enough? Will you marry me again?”
Judging by the way she forcefully exhaled, he thought Zinnia might’ve been holding her breath. She launched forward, slamming into him so hard he fell back against the wall. He held her up by the waist, and she held on to him tighter than she’d ever had before, burying her face in his neck.
Every second she said nothing was an eternity. He concentrated on the rise and fall of her chest against his. The softness of her bare shoulder under his hand. How perfectly she fit inside his arms. She was trembling—in all the times he’d held her, he’d never felt her do that.
Zinnia raised her head as if she were coming up for air.
Like almost everything she did, the way she kissed surprised him.
It was without mercy, hell-bent on bending him to her will.
And when he pushed back, refusing to be conquered, she matched his energy, just like she’d promised.
His wife always smelled like flowers. Touched him as roughly as she did tenderly. And he loved her insatiable mouth.
“Yes, you are and yes, I will.” Her gasping whisper instantly restored his shattered heart. “And for the love of god, will you please help me take my dress off now?”
Jordan was all too happy to oblige. Her breath hitched as his fingertips trailed down her spine, chasing the zipper. So, it was a thong.
Zinnia winced while peeling the petals off her perfect breasts, and he eagerly volunteered to massage the pain away. He loved her at all times, in all ways, and especially like this, with darkened eyes and heavy lids. They were naked and on the bed within seconds.
“I meant everything I said,” he murmured close to her ear while moving inside her. “What do you want?”
“What do you think?” She bucked her hips and clenched, throwing off his rhythm just to prove she could.