Chapter Seventeen #2
The following morning, I met up with Torrin before heading to breakfast in the palace. I worked hard to keep my mind behind an indestructible wall. I didn’t wish for my cousin to hear my messy thoughts.
Torrin was intuitive regardless—a Brighthell trait. “You alright?” he asked, his brown eyes shifting to the side as we strode through the halls.
“Yep,” I lied. “I’m fine.”
Torrin sighed, muttering, “You’ve never been good at bullshitting, Mare.”
Vi called out from behind, hurrying forward to join us. “Good morning, you two!” she greeted happily, her violet eyes bright and excited for what the day would bring.
Torrin gave her a soft smile, though his expression faltered when he looked at me again.
“What happened while you were gone?”
I didn’t answer, and Torrin’s gaze narrowed.
“Did anything happen between you and Erabella?” he urged.
Leave it alone, Torrin.
A couple more steps, and Torrin’s head dropped.
His voice was quiet inside my head, defeated. “Lena and Silas slept together.”
I came to a screeching halt as I gaped at Torrin.
Vi’s head bounced from my cousin and me. “What’s going on?”
At his broken expression, I read him, his heartbreak clawing through my ribs. I hated that his love for her went unrequited.
I’m sorry.
He shrugged and resumed walking. Vi raised a brow at me, and I waved my hand dismissively.
“Pity me, and tell me what happened,” he continued.
I stifled a groan.
I…I had sex with Era.
It was now Torrin who became immobilized, nearly stumbling.
“Come on!” Vi whined, hands going to her hips. “Conversing in your heads with me right here is rude!”
Torrin tried to cover his shock. “S-sorry, Viola.” His brows lowered, and he focused forward as we picked up our pace again.
No response? Or is that judgment?
“I’m not judging you.” We rounded a corner. “I’m just surprised by how easily she ran into Silas’s arms.”
You and me both…
Seagulls were crying outside, the smell of saltwater filling my nostrils. I wished I could enjoy the beauty of this place, savor the comfortable breeze that rustled my hair as we neared the dining area. But life without Era just felt…dull.
“I can’t read her mind for some reason.”
My head recoiled, shooting him a disbelieving stare. “What?”
He shrugged again. “It’s the strangest thing. Like her thoughts are jumbled static.” He paused. “Can you read her normally?”
My brows pinched as I mulled it over.
I’ve noticed nothing different, other than her sudden disinterest in me.
Our conversation ceased as we entered the colossal room.
I paid no mind to the exotic fruit spread, nor the clear ocean just steps from where we sat.
No—my attention went to Era, immediately.
She was beautiful in her shell bra and sheer skirt, stunning as always.
But the darkness under her eyes concerned me. She appeared unwell, unrested.
Was my absence hurting her, too?
I tried reading her, feeling a subtle blend of guilt and sorrow.
She wouldn’t meet my eyes, even as I’d sneak glances at her during Lena’s many attempts to talk about the horrors happening on the mainland.
Valter appeared like he wished to hear more, his bright green gaze unwavering anytime she spoke.
But Lucretia kept changing the subject. Not surprising.
The Mages here lived in paradise essentially—no humans hunting them, no Undead terrorizing their land. Why would they wish to change that?
After our group enjoyed the fascinating foods and chatter, we were ushered toward the sea for some time to swim.
Yesterday, we were told of something called The Chamber of Time, and while we were to wait for it to charge—for Lena to use Igon’s memento for some answers—we were encouraged to explore all Nereida had to offer. They were even throwing a ball.
I overheard Silas tell Era he’d be a moment, and the second he departed, I marched over to Era, sitting in the warm sand.
“We need to talk,” I insisted as I sat down beside her.
Her stare was locked on the waves, or maybe our friends who had jumped into the water. “I can’t,” she said quietly, refraining from meeting my gaze.
“You can’t?” I took in a few painful breaths. “Era, I haven’t spoken to you since we escaped.”
She bit down on her lip, her eyes becoming glossy. “I can’t do this…”
My breathing faltered, my chest becoming heavy. “Did I imagine everything?” My voice broke. “Did I make up those forty-three days with you? I opened up to you about everything—”
“You didn’t imagine it,” she interrupted. “But Merrick—”
“You said you loved me,” I persisted in a low voice. “You said I was your person.”
“I know I did. I—”
I sounded pathetic as I whispered harshly, “So then why are you treating me like this?!”
“Because I’m afraid!” she hissed quietly, her gaze darting around in fear of anyone overhearing our conversation.
But no one was paying attention. Everyone was too engrossed in the beauty of this beach.
“I’m afraid.” She finally brought those defeated brown eyes to mine.
“It was different in the Valley. I had never felt freer. But it wasn’t reality, Merrick.
I can’t just tell Silas I’m not his wife anymore.
We can’t just run off into the sunset…as much as I may want to.
” She shook her head, staring back at the sea. “It’s too complicated.”
“So, your solution is to give me the cold shoulder?”
“That’s not it, not at all,” she whispered, sighing.
“We were away from everyone for so long, Merrick…I’m afraid I will forget.
” She paused. “That I will run into your embrace, that I will slip up and kiss you in front of everyone.” Her gaze slowly slid to mine, beautiful and broken.
“I thought I wanted you before the Valley. But now, knowing what it all felt like…” She exhaled shakily.
“I shouldn’t have to tell you. I’m sure you can feel it. ”
And as I read her, as those words came out, I did—desire that was so urgent, and fear that was agonizing.
“Believe me, Era, I wish I could take you right here on the sand,” I murmured, placing my palm in the shoreline dust beside hers, brushing her pinky with mine. “But, most importantly, I miss talking to you. I…I miss you.”
Her eyes darkened to charcoal as I let her feel my truth. “I miss you too, Merrick,” she whispered, brushing her pinky against mine. “I miss it all.”
She misses me.
I wasn’t going to waste any more time. I hastily stood, whipping my shirt off, leaving nothing but my navy swim shorts. Era breathed out slowly when I tilted my head down at her and held out my hand. “Swim with me?” I grinned. “Like old times?”
Apprehension spread up my ribs as she flicked her gaze between my extended hand and my eyes.
“It won’t be weird going into the water, Princess. It’s a beach.”
She offered a seductive smile. “Being in the water with you will bring up…conflicting memories,” she said lowly.
I shook my head. “Conflicting?”
As her eyes trailed over my features, she grasped my hand and said softly, “I will want you again.”
I helped her to her feet, her body close, yet painfully far away. “You stopped?” I questioned gently.
She shook her head slowly. “Not possible.”
I didn’t want to, but I released her hand, not wanting to reveal our romantic attraction to our friends. I headed toward the blue waves, beckoning Era to follow me.
Era’s face scrunched cutely as we made it halfway into the water, the liquid cold against our skin.
“It’s easier to just jump in, ya know!” Roland called out, his wet hair slicked back, a boyish grin on his face. When his eyes went to Era, an unpleasant feeling hit me.
Was that guilt?
I didn’t focus on it too long, as Elowen’s squeal tore my attention to the right. Zipping past my sister in the water were large fish.
No. Sea Nymphs.
One of them—a girl—popped her head up, covering her mouth sheepishly. “Sorry!” she shouted.
My jaw unhinged at the sight of her. Her cheeks and temples were stained a dreamy shade of aquamarine, her webbed ears the same hue. She wasted no time, dipping back beneath the waves to swim toward her friends.
Era choked out an incredulous laugh. “Gods…I can’t believe what I’m seeing.”
At this point, my shoulders were submerged under the water, Era still shivering in place, afraid to dip under.
“C’mon, Princess,” I urged, splashing her.
“Merrick!” she scolded in a shriek, and when I splashed her again, she did the same back.
At her growing smile, I lunged for her, pulling her down. She cried out from the cold, then swatted me. “Damn you!” she giggled.
Her laughter died down, however, as my fingertips, still at her waist, brushed against her skin.
“Merrick,” she breathed, eyes shining with warning. “You’re too close.”
“No one’s paying attention,” I murmured, raking my gaze over her face.
Her heavy stare fell to my lips, lingering for a fleeting moment before she drew away. “Too tempting,” she whispered.
And then her attention flickered to the palace, to the shirtless Prince who had returned. “His shirt,” she gasped. “He’s…he’s never once taken off his shirt.”
My brows pinched, and Era moved, trudging through the ocean waves as quickly as she could until her feet hit the sand, and she hurried to him.
I couldn’t understand why he’d refrained from fully undressing until I saw it. My breath caught as I studied the gashes and burns on his back. Gods. Someone had beaten him brutally. Repeatedly. I’d never seen such marred skin.
I didn’t interrupt either of them during the several hours of swim time, not wanting to erase Era’s radiant smile. But we’d catch each other’s eyes occasionally.
I knew she loved Silas. Knew his happiness mattered to her as well.
Her headaches eventually became too much. I could tell long before she insisted on lying down. Hendry volunteered to assist Era back to her room so Silas could enjoy the outdoors longer.
I speedily exited the water, hurrying to them before they reentered the palace. “I can walk with her,” I offered breathlessly, and Era scowled at me.
“I don’t mind,” Hendry insisted, mismatched eyes narrowing as they dashed between the two of us. At Era’s silence, he said, “Come on, Your Highness.” The two of them continued onward.
Over her shoulder, she offered the smallest smile before disappearing inside.
I wasn’t sure how to feel.